THE CHINA MAIL, OCTOBER 1, 1937.
THE WORLD GOES BY
THE Japanese Carul
Shanghai in a lengthy state ment to the newspapers has this to say about local journalists.
he had a bigger car.
these figures if it o
to
The cabin of a liner was used in Many of the foreign journalists all the scenes of a new play. Some in Shanghai have degraded a critic is bound to say it is all noble calling by prostituting "bunk." their pens in gross misrepresen
tation, using the contemptible de
+3
the company of swing music fans, 1 advise you to memorse this list. "Give me the type of business. Otherwise you'll have to hire an man who says what he wants to interpreter. say and then stops" says a mer--
Cats chant. But surely the one is prefer- Piston
able who says it and then goes.
Each of the guests at a dance Glossary
supposed to re- rhyme character.
vice of the half truth, and the held at a club
Swing music, which is a develop suggestion of the false. A compresent a nur parison of their published ac-A lady in a very decollete evening ment from jazz music, has a langu
of current war news" dress was presumed to have gone age of its own that cannot fail to with the confirmed events will as Mother Hubbard's cupboard. delight those who have an apprecia- show their dishonesty, as they
An influenza foxtrot has beention of words.
counts
Agony-pipe
Wopstick
Licorice stick Gobblepipe Dog house Pushpipe Grunt-iron
Dance musicians.
Trumpet.
Clarinet.
Ditto.
Ditto.
Saxophone. Bass viol. Trombone. Tuba.
My own winner in the above list is "Grunt-iron." hotly followed by
cannot blame these discrepancies written by a modernist composer. Should you ever find yourself in “Agony-pipe.” entirely on the unreliability of Chinese communications. They are rendering a grave disservice to their nationals and to the cause of international peace with all it connotes, especially in à cosmopolitan place like Shang- hai. Blind prejudice and self- interest are the mainsprings of their canards, palpable to all but those who share their aberra- tions.
Al of which reminds us of a story:---
if
An actor out of work—“resting," was walking you please,
-BY- "ULYSSES"
moodily along a street when he was accosted by a lady.
"It's no use m'dear. I'm just a poor actor out of work.”
"Ard I'm a poor girl who can't make a living.”
"Shake hands m'dear. Members of two of the oldest professions ruined by
encarnadinéd
amateurs."
*
these
*
More Progress
*
Many of us who took the trouble. to be born beautiful and with loads of personality or so we believe- have been depressed by the film expert who said that the camera "cam convert the plain, freckled woman into a glamorous star" More, he said that sound, while yet incapable of working miracles, "can already modify a strident voice into a pleasant one and make a mumbling actor understand- able
כב
Still more, he said "We are only. at the beginning of the possibili- ties.”
It seems, then, that the stars of the future, off the screen, will real- ly have faces like pies and voices like a peacock's. Our only hope, with our natural beauty, will be to double for them in public.
* ** *
These Military Dicta
فروشی
It was a bright lad who remark- ed that an army marches on its stomach, but we have never yet seen <a military tummy soled and heeled.
Then there was another cove who stated that Waterloo was wopon the playing fields of Eton. It is. remarks like this that make the Borstal boys class conscious.
And how about every soldier carrying a field marshal's baton in his knapsack, when all a good soldier asks for now is a really useful entrenching tool?
In Europe a motorist drove into a carload of 27 people, inju
them. He is convinced that he
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