1929-10-31 — Page 3

HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.

THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, THURSDAY, "OCTOBER 31, 1929.

SUBURBAN HEIGHTS-LEAVES ·

COMMENCING SHORTLY,

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS

AL JOLSON

ALL

IN "THE SINGING FOOL? TALKING.

Jim: "What's become of young Smile and his money t Tim: The young fool's been playing ducks and drakes with it." | In- deed, bon?"

Put it into a poultry farm."

Maud: Is there much conpeti- tion in your office " Inn Rather --between the mirror and the clock."

Little Joan, inquisitive, asked: "Daddy, what do you do at your office? Father, feeling rather tired and upset, replied: **Ob, noth- ing

Then how do you know when you're finished 7" queried Joan.

When

A minister called upon a wo- and, finding no one at home, slip- man member of his congregation,.

ped through the letter-box a card, After scribbling upon it the words, Visitor: "You haven't got halfSorry to find you out." as nice acematory here as we have the woman returned home, Mary; in our town. Prominent Citizen: the maid, met her at the door and Nove always heard that the presented the eard with a whisper. eemetery is the only part of your town that holds out any induge- ments for permanent residenta !

Here, mum, I took charge of this. It would never do for the master to know the minister's found you Fout $

Customer: Give me a comb without pyorroen." Clerk: "What Kindly shopkeeper (aa small boy. on earth do you mean?7" One jenters); What does my little whose teeth won't fall out."

How is your little girl getting on with her music? First rate. My neighbours are beginning to speak to me again."

***

Have you

any references "Yes, ma'am, a jat of 'em.?! "Then, why didn't you bring them with your They're just like my photographs, ma'am. None of 'em does me justice !"

"

Yes, he had a pleasant job, but

resigned." he

I'm surprised! The last time I saw him he told me his job was a regular sinecure." "Yes, but then it became insecure."

A woman with five children en- tered atrament. She busied her self seating them. A benevolent old gentleman rose and gave her his seat. "Are those all your chil- drun, madam ?" he asked, or is it picnic 1” "They are all mine," snapped the woman, and it's a picnic."

Mr. "Suburby: "Which do you advice me to plant-onion seed or turnip " Mr. Nextdoor: "31y chickens prefer "turnip."

112

тал wish to buy-chocolates 1" Small Boy: "You bet your life I do; but I've got to buy song."

Rate Collector: "Is Mrs. Smith at home?" Maid: "Yes, but she isn't receiving to-day."Oh, that will be all right! I'm not deliver- ing; I'm collecting."

A Scotsman declared that tele- gruphy was known in Scotland at the dawn of time. We've dug up the wires," he said. To which an Irishman replied, "We had wire- less telegraphy thousands of years ago. "How can you prove that

Sure, we've not been able to find any wires."

Politician's Wife (at 2 a.m.) There's the baby crying again,. John. What shall we do with him " Sleepy Voice: "I move: the gentleman be no longer heard."

He: True, my salary is not large; but then, two can live as cheaply as one." She: "Dut, Tom, dear, you forget-there's mother."

DECIDES TO RAKE UP LEAVES.

SIGHS AND RAKES "THEM UP INTO

ANOTHER NEAT PILE.

GLUYA:

SETS TO WORK, WISH ING HE WERE PLAY- ING GOLF INSTEAD...

TURNS AND SEES THAT THE BREEZE HAS NOW SCATTER ED HIS FIRST PILE

SPORT

MOTOR JYCLING.

L. H. Davenport. (Wolverhamp- on) who covered the course of 246 miles on an A.J.S. machines (was first home in the Ulster Grand Prix Weary Traveller (at railway sta month. G. E. Rowley, also on an motor-cycle road race held last tion on a south-country line): Is A.J.S. finished second, with F A there a cemetery bero" Porter: Longman (O. K. Supreme) third. "No, sir." Then where do you G. Walker, last year's winner. bury the people who die when waitinished fourth on his powerful ing for trains?"

Rudge and won the 500 cc. dass at an average speed of 80.63 m.ph, the fastest ever attained over tho course, Davenport and Longman won their respective classes, 230 Lc. and 200 ach

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

10

20

$27

128

Jaa

133

34

36

24937

[38

140

41

143

45

50

52

155

1156

57

46

Horizontal.

I-Vise man.

5.-Crustacean, 0-Convulsive sigh. 12-English school, 13-Nevada city. 14. To attempt. 15,-B

18-Profound. 18.-Borrow. 20.-While.

92-Recompense.

24. -Plant.

27.-Suffers.

29.-Not clerical.

31.-Through.

68

32-To look into pryingly.

34.-Soapstone.

36,-Bix.

37-Trench maker.

30.-jumped.

43.-Siberian river.

49-High hatter." "

44. Sudden light. 45.-Bick.

17.-Bailors

49.-To escape. 50.--To conduct. 82.—To bo fond. 54.-Symbol for nickel.

30.-Procured.

57.-Festive. 59.-To exist.

81-A mumber. 03.-Wing-shaped. 65. To depend. 67.-Conjunction. 08.-Shallow dishes. 69-Woody plant

Vertical. 1.-Body of water. 2.Procurable. 3.-Boxing match. 4.-Conclusion. 5.--Fish basket,» 8. To do again. 7.-Article. a.-Salutation. 9.-Precipitous, 10. Conjunction. 11-Alongside.

17-Type measure. 19.-Exclamation.

21.To spill.

23.

-Clock face.

26-Capable of being turned

about,

28.--Newlyweds.

27.To absolve.

28.-Soaks up.

30.-In music, symbol for pitch. 33.-Inclosed.

35.-Unmuffed, 38.-Thoroughfare, 40,--Acke.

43-Henvy ahoe. 48.-Kind of beer. 48.-Heavenly bodies. 51. To perform. 03-Spanish article. 50-To knock lightly. 55.-Skill.

80.-Organ of head." 61.Over and touching. 02-Not any. 64-Sixth note of scale.

8--Comparative ending.

70.00

GETS ALL LEAVES INTO A NEAT PILE AT LAST

STARTS TO RAKE THEM UP AGAIN WHEN HE NOTICES THAT A BACK-EDDY IS BRINGING THE LEAVES OVER FROM LES CRUMS PLACE

LOOKS ROUND AND SEES "TO HIS DISMAY THAT LEAVES FROM FRED PERLEY'S LAWN HAVE BLOWN ONTO PLACE HE HAS JUST RAKER.

DECIDES THAT THE WIND MAY SHIFT AND- BLOW ALL HIS LEAVES ONTO HIS NEIGHBORS

LAWNS AND HE MIGHT AS WELL.BE PLAYING GOLF

=

¿Copyright, 1927, by The Bell Syndicats, Inc.) 10-51

AND ATHLETICS.

Grosskreutz in two straight runs. At Stamford Bridge in the eveni- ing Gus Kuhn won four event: He won the Chelsea Scratch Race at

the fast speed of 43.06 m.ph.. the Fulham Handicap, with an allow ance of Isee, at 40.38, beat N. Nicol in a match at 41.95, and then se-

# eured the matchwinners' race In a three-round match B. Lament, from W. Phillips at 42.90 m.p.b.

the Australian, beat J.Taylor in two straight runs.

DEADLY TACKLING.

00-

were

tackling on both sides was deadly, and there was no further score. On Cardiff's side Stone played a perfect back game, while D. Jones and Cameron shone on mang essions. Poole, too, at the base of the serum was distinctly elever, and The outstanding forwards was well supported by Williams, Skym, H. Jones, and Lawis. The Cardiff pack however, fell away towards the close of the second half. T. Scourfeld, the horns, back, did well, and the three-quarters com- Three thousand people at Tor-bined excellently. The forwards W. J. C. Hewitt and M. V. Me- quay saw Cardiff win a keen game had the better of matters during Cudden each gained a victory for

by one goal two tries (17 points) the last ten minutes, and played J. S. Worters, whose Excelsior-There were changes in the Cardiff

to one goal one ry (8 points), with great determination. Japs they were driving. The for- side, P. Stone taking, the place,

TENNIS. mer won the 250 cc. race at 80.40 Trevor Lees at back, while "P. m.ph, and the latter was success-

Cameron was on the right wing,

The Hon. P. R. Aitken won the in the exant, for small anger and N. Fender came in for Bar-Boys Singles in the Surrey, Junior rell it the pack. The Cardiff backs Championships at Sutton **last Jones, driving the only cycle-car-at the meeting, secured the five-laps quarter of an hour, and the for- in the final by 6-4, 6-1. Nuthall, were lively and superior in the first month, when he heat J. W. Nuthall all-comers' handicap at 77.81 m.p.h.

wards better in all departments. with a wider range of strokes, was A. L. Loweth, in winning the 500 This was particularly demonstrat-unable to break up a driver's game, c. race, averaged 84.15 m.p.h., theed ten minutes before the interval "Aitken's driving on the forehand highest speed of the afternoon.

Cameron scoring a clever try after was some of the best ever seen in There were 30,000 spectators at intercepting a pas intended for junior lawn tennis. He attained the Crystal Palace last month, Foot. P. Thomas added the goal real speed. Not only had his when T. Sharp boat Gus Kuhn in a pointa. Torquay drew level when drives great speed through the air, match by two straight runs, and won Payne scored from a transfer by but they gathered pace off the the final of the Flying Nine Race Stabb, and Twose converted, It ground, Nathall's characteristic at 41.74 m.p.k, failing by helf was at this stage that the Cardiff | take-back of the racket preparatory n wheel to catch J. Stevens in the forwards begun to play with splen- to making a stroke, so like that of Crystal Palace Open Scratch Race. did combination, and before half- his sister, often found him late in In the final of the Trophy J. Bar- time M. R. Tarnbull and P. Lewis making the return., He was out.", ratt beat B. Donkin at 42.41 m.p.h. added tries. Stone did much good paced and outplayed, Miss K. M. Sharp and Stevens met again in work in the second half, and, in Payne won the Girls' Singles by match at Lea Bridge in the even- fact, the whole Cardiff back divi- beating Miss L. Wilkinson by 4-8, ing, when the former won by two sion improved, and play was very 6-0, 6-2. Aitken went on straight runa. Sharp also quali- fast. Torquay, too, played excel achieve a triple success, for he woo fied for the final of the Crystallent football, and Twose gained a the Boys Doubles with C. R.. Palace and Les Bridge match, but try from a pass by Delahay. The Faweus against the brothers. J. W. was unable to start owing to an in-home forwards appeared to be and J. S. Nuthall, and was also. jured foot, the race being won by standing the pace better, and made victorious in the Mixed Doubles Stevens, T. Croombs beat Max several determined attacks, but the with Miss Payno.

THE WOMAN'S CORNER.

MARROW PRESERVES.

Marrow ginger is always popu lar. Here is a good recipe. You will need six pounds of marrow,' ripened to melt #ress, six pounds of preserving sugar, the juice of two lemons, one quart of water, an ounce and a half of essence of ginger.

Peel the marrow;

remove the seeds, and cut it into pieces the size of a walnut. Place in an, ears thenware pan with the sugar and lemon juice. Leave for three days; This puzzle took 23 minutes to strring ocensionally. solve. See how long it will take Boil for an hour and a half with you to solve it.

the water and replace it in the pan for two days. Boil again for one hour, and when cold add the essence of ginger.

Preserved with lemon, marrow is

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.

GOAD ECO SCAN

ED: BERTTE EP. HTIGE 28IM.ZIPE 27500ROT SUP DUMALAP KED (BATES

90 MET

ONLR SALE FLAIR RELEK2 B2TICE EDEN AGO. ELIS Z423 7ODE BLOW

TOMATO SAUCE.

to

IN

AT THE

An unusual story of

a man without a con-

science about women,

regenerated at last by

a pure love.

JOHN

GILBERT

THE MASKS OF THE DEVIL "?

QUEEN'S

STAR BOKLA

THURSDAY TO SATURDAY

At 2.30, 5.10, 7.15 & 9.20

MONTE BLUE

'IN

"ONE ROUND HOGAN

THURSDAY TO SATURDAY AT 5.30 & 9.20.

LIONEL BARRYMORE

IN

THE BELLS "

Continuous Performance

THURSDAY TO SATURDAY FROX 1.15 To 11.15.)

STAR THEATRE

5-DAYS ONLY-5 Commencing Monday, Nov. 4th.

THE SHOW OF SHOWS

RUTH

VAN

VALEY REVUE

A

REVUSICAL, MUSICAL, MAGICAL SHOW. NOTE:--M188 RUTH VAN VALEY WILL POSITIVELY APPEAR Booking at Montríe's and Star. Prices: $3, $2, $1.

BY MAIL, WIRE, AND BRITAIN'S NEW FORESTS.

WIRELESS.

·

Wolverhampton-Fred Downing,

PROFITS FROM WASTE LANDS.

21, jumped into six feet of water in

Creat Britain is once more be-. the canal at Wolverhampton to coming a country of forests. The

FASHION NOTE.

reseug Alfred Nightingale, a boy of

cess line is being shown, with youk-

Forestry Commission bas.. planted

For tomato sauce, take one pound A slight modification of the grinnine, and a 13-month-old baby who 273,913 acres of woodlands between fresh tomatoes, pint white stock or milk water,

Slice the tomatoes and vegetables and put in a pan with the stock, butter, bacon and seasoning. Bring to boiling point and simmer half an hoor. Rub through a hair soive

or fine gravy' strainer. Mix the cornflour to a smooth paste with a little cold stock or milk, add to the strained liquid, and return to the pan

-

::

Boscombe.-George Coltart Cox,

were added in the past year.

l

It has been the policy of the com

missioners to re-plant the old royal forests, such as Sherwood, the New Forest, Rockingham, Wyre and ring like trumpet calls down the High Peak ancient names that lanes of history

one ounce mar-ed hips, and flares and godets, bewas strapped in a perambulator 1920 and 1928, and 17,237 acres garine, half teasponful sugar, deslow the hips, Infinito variety in which had accidentally fallen into bertspoonful corr.flour, a small car the sleeve line, balloon, semi-bal- the water.

Downing brought the rat, and piece of turnip the same loon, bell-shaped, tightly-awathed size, one Harge onion, half rasher sleeves, are all suggested by the cou perambulator in which the child of bacon cut in small pieces, salt turfers for winter wear.

was strapped to the canal bank, There are even double sleeves, and Nightingale was rescued by and pepper to taste.

tight crepe de Chine below and loose chiffon above. There are two other men. coloured sleeves, one colour from wrist to elbow and another colour above, and there are unexpected 45, of Oakdone, Sandhill Heath, different colourFordingbridge (Hants), died in the sleeves of a totally

sea at Boscombe while bathing, from the rest of the dress.

Some winter coats made of cloth Artificial respiration was tried for have the entire sleeves made of fur, an hour without avail and most of them have deep fur

Chelsea.The police, are seeking cuffs to cover the elbow in exag the husband of Mrs. Muriel Etrenne very good. Take equal quantities Stir until boiling, allow to cookgerated mousquetaire style.

for a minute or two until a thick, Greens are for the coming season, Fay, of More's-garden, Cheyne creamy consistency, and add a few all kinds of greens, but the brighter walk, Chelsea, who was found lying drops of carmine to give a good the better-emerald, lettuce, and dead on the pavement, having ap- one that is like nothing but cater-parently fallen from the window of pillar green. Almond, one sees too, her flat, on the fifth floor Honey beige, maroon brown, sap- phire and turquoise blue, and black, of course, while white and scarlet are used a lot for the even- ing. mil Embroidered and beaded net is Slice the marrow and steam until a "new" idea for the evening, while fish, and when cold cook some dinner dresses, which have ter, and lemons cut in four. When matching head pieces to wear round until creamy with the sugar, but beaded designs on the bodice, have cooked take out the pieces of le the hair in the shape of an irre moa.

·gular beaded bandean.

of well-ripened marrow and loaf sugar, half teaspoonful of wine to every pound of marrow, one lemon, and five pepper pods,

Peel and cut the marrow into thin strips. Sprinkle some of the sugar over it and leave for twenty- four hours, Boil for an hour and half with the rest of the sugar, the lemons sliced, and the pods in a muslin bog, yazmak

Stand for twelve hours and boil for an hour. Remove the marrow, add the wine, boil with a little more sugar until clear, and then pour over the marrow. (Continued at foot of next column),

colour.

For marrow curd: To each pound of marrow use three-quarters of a pound of sugar, two lemons, two

ounces of butter.

...

The greatest stretch of forest any where in England, will be in East Anglia, where an entirely new aren ed with 24,000 sores around Thet is being planted. It is being sturt ford, and ultimately the commis sionors dream of extending this to a mighty forest of 80,000 to 100,000 acres. This would be four times. the size of the New Forest,

Last year the commissioners spent 2848,930, and as most of the trees planted were spruce and fir, re turns will begin to come in about twenty years hence, We draw nine-tenths of our timber supplies Bow woman: I had seven child-£100,000,000 a year, although at the from abroad, (ata) cost of ren, but one got married, and that lowest estimato we have 3,000,000 leaves six.

waste, acres suited for afforestation, Nottingham man: We are pals, but at present unplanted. N

often say that I will knock In Wales the annual demand for pitprops requires 500,000 acres of forest to supply them. This is exactly the area of forestable waste land in the Principalit

his head uff.

Chairman at Kingston: Where did he strike you. Man: On the right face!