1929-10-24 — Page 3

HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.

THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 24, 1929.

THE FAMILY ALBUM-RATTLES

GLOYAS

WinS

By GLUYAS WILLIAMS

"You should take this mulberry

coloured dress, madam, it would suit you excellently as you are so pale."

"But I am not usually pale-Ifà am only shocked at the price."

I've roamed on the steppes and the

pampas,

I've lived in the jungle and wood: I 'Neath the Matterhorn's crest I

have taken my rest; On the trackless Sahara T're stood. I've been in all climes and" all

places,

And most to the memory are dear; But the place loathed by me is the

space with the sign.

That registers:

"Here."..

+36 Parking

To the sun-smitten isles I'm no

stranger

In the north where the wind's like

A knife,

I've laughed at its roar on the

Labrador shore. And thought this a wonderful life. But I'm back in the regions of com-

fort.

And the knowledge plicits a tear; Though I'm glad not to roam, it's

Innst sad to come home. To a spot that says: “No Parking

"Here."

امی

"A quart of cow's milk in this bottle... please."

*1"

"But that bottle is to small for a quart of cow's milk.

Then I will have a quart of goat's milk."

What are you doing now, Jack"

"Talking for the pictures."

That's fine. What part do you take!"

Well, if you must know, I do the ballyhoo outside the theatre."

College Girl: "I'd like my salary raised next week."

Harried Business Man: "You'll be lucky if I can raise it this week,"

.."

When the report went around that Rudyard Kipling was getting a shilling a word for something be was writing, some Oxford students aet about rag. Wiring him a shilling, they said. "Please send us one of your words."

And right back came the answer, Thanks"

I

"What did you say to the traffic

יין

thing." naswered Mr. Chug-

ging." When a traffic cop starts talk. I'm no orator. I'm just a good listener."

Mrs. Newlywed: "Oh, you did splendidly with the wallpapering. But what are those darling! lumps?".

Mr. Newlywed: "I forgot to take down the pictures."

Mrs. Alden was about to engage

a new servant girl. "And do you have to be called in the morning?" she asked the applicant.

"I don't has to be mum," the gril replied, unless you happens

Lo need me."

The young husband preferred to stay home, but to please his wife they engaged board at a country hotel for the summer. Nearly every night after dinner the husband hovered around "the parlour and managed to occupy the piano stool instead of a chair.

"I'don't understand, dear," said his wife one evening.

• why you always sit at the piano. You know you can't play a note!"

"Ah!” replied the husband,' neither enn anyone else, my love, while I am, here!"

Inventor (to capitalist): “This, sir, is an epoch-making machine." Capitalist: Is it! Then let me see it make an epoch.'

The unsophisticated yokel looked up as we approached."

But

Excuse ine,' I said. could you show us exactly where we are And I held out the map,

He took it and looked at it for a moment. Then he grinned.

This is a map of Surrey," he said, politely.

"I know that," I said. What we want to know is exactly where abouts in Surrey we are."

"You're not," he said.

in Kent."

"You're

Spectator (to referee): "If you can't keep order I'd better call a policeman."

SETS OUT CHEERILY FOR A DRIVE, WITH THE FAMILY

HEARS STRANGE RATTLE. CXCKS HEAD

DRIVES ALONS IN TENSE SI- LENGE, EVERYONE LISTENING, RATTLE IMMEDIATELY CEASING.

12

LEANS OUT TO LISTEN, "TAKING EYES OFF ROAD UNTIL WIFE GETS FRANTIC

FAMILY AGREES THAT IT'S JUST DAD WORRYING AGAIN," THERE PROBABLY NEVER WAS A RATTLE

ADDS TO BLOOM BY ANNDONG- 116 IT SOUNDS" LIKE A BROKEN SPRING OR ELSE A WHEEL IS EDING TO DROP OFF

(Cepyright 1929, by The Bell Syndicate, Inc)

SPORT

WRESTLING IN AUSTRALIA.

AND

SIPS" CHATTER ON THE BACK SEAT SO EVERYONE CAN

LISTEN FOR THE RATTLE

MOMENT LATER EXCLAIMS THERE IT IS AGAIN!

PROCOVERS PRESENTLY RATTLE' 15-CIMIDES FROM DILAPIDATED TETOR FOLLOWING BEHIND. EBOYS DRIVE AGAIN

9-23

ATHLETICS.

hold compelling him to roll back

CYCLING RECORDS BROKEN. In a match filled with thrills, in pain. Eustace escaped, only to fast and scientific work, and acfall into a toc hold. Three times

A new cycling record has been casional rough methods, American Eustace threw his opponent with set up by Mr. Jack Rossitar, who completed a ride from Land's End Eastace, were awarded a draw after wrestlers Jim Browning and Allan headlocks and held him with no

arim bar, but the round closed with to John o' Groats. The total dis

tance of 863 miles was covered in eight rounds at Rushcutter Bay out a fall Escaping from a toe Stadium last month. Eustace gain. hold early in the third term,

61 hours 2 minutes, which is 8 ed a fall in the Fourth round, but Browning assumed the offensive, hours 29 minutes less than the pre- viou record, set up 21 years ago Browning equalised matters by pin and had Eustace in trouble with ning his opponent in the seventh. a wristlock, but the latter broke by Harry Green. Since then there Although they opened carefully away. Browning was applauded have been many unsuccessful at- the first round had not proceeded for his cleverness in breaking a tempts to lower the record. far when strenuous work, commene wristlock and head scizzors, and hesiter rode a Raleigh cycle fitted call a policeman? I am a police-ed. Eustace went to the mat, but was holding Eustace with a too

Browning was unable to hold him. grip at the close of the session. Eustace threw bis opponent

Browing was cautioned by the re- against the ropes, and soon after ferce for punching his opponent in the fourth round. There were ex- citing moments in this session, and after Browning had freed himself from a wristlock, Eustace lifted him and threw him heavily with a a crutch hold and body press. in

Referee: "What d'you mean,

ין in!!

CROSSWORD PUZZLE.

R

Iສ

el

סון

2

15

16 17

#

12

14

15

16

18

19

20

22

[20]

24

126

30

35

56 57

38

41

42

144

45

146

3:47

148 449

50

51

52

53

54

55

Horizontal.

-Selected.

6.-Injures.

11.-To place in front. 12-Foreigners

14.-Symbol for radium.

15. Having ounces. 17-By.

18.Pronoun. 20. To cheer up. 21.-Part of "to be."

-Seines.

St-Female sheep,

25.---Kilted.

28.-Followed..

28.-Black in duty,

30.Jutting rock.

31.-Margin.

32-Cooked in water.

33-Most lacking in colour.

33.-Footless...

3. To employ.

41-Poetic for enough.

42.-Japanese monetary unit.

43.-To growl.

45,--Part of shoe.

46.-Within.

47. Tuba for wires.

48

Compass point.

50.-Safo.

32.-Percolated,

34.-Clothed.

55.-Home of Biblical witch.

Vertical,

1-Interior of volcano,

2-Pronoun.

3.---Away.

4.- Father,

B.-Banished.

--Tying line.

7--On the sheltered side.

8-To free.

8.- Pronoun.

10.-Traps.

11. To impress. 13-Boils slowly.

16.-Rule.

12.-Position.

21.-Sustenance.

23-To reprimand.

25. To grin pleasantly. 21.--Before.

20.-Age. 32,-Foundation,

33. Device for opening. 34.-Demanded debt payment. 36. To rend. 36.-Earlier.

37-Twilled woolen fabric. 40.-Downcast.

43.-Painful.

44.-Legal claim.

47,-Young bear. 48.-To spread. 51.-Business association (abbr.). 53.-Italian river.

This puzzle took 22 minutes to solve. See how long it will take you to solve. ít.

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.

7AR BFNCR - HEE (27 VEZUE DES REPAID ZAMPED

GP

BAR FI28

HREDED BOBINAGO IRBAZ BOO

Browning secured armlock, throwing Eustace to the canvas, The latter struggled with his free hand, compelling Browning to re- lease him. Eustace hurled his op ponent through the ropes, and later Browning kicked himself free from

toehold. By a spectacular move

Browning leaped upon his adver- sary's back, escaping from an arm bar. It was a fierce round with both men doing clever work, and for heavyweights their movements were fast.

.103 נחף

Wild

In the fifth round, Browning lifted Eustace bodily and sought to throw him to the canvas, but Eustace's legs catching in the ropes prevented the fall. work marked the next turn. Brown ing roughed his adversary with a face bar, and the referee cautioned Eustace for punching, in which both men engaged. Eustace hurled his opponent to the ropes, and then to the mat. Later he appeared to have his shoulders down, but the fall was pat allowed,

Again fierce methods were resort- ed to in the second term, Eustace holding Browning to the mat with a hammerlock; but Browning rolled under the ropes before his should ers were pinned. He was hocted for landing a blow with his elbows on Eustace's riba. Eustace had Browning secured his fall after a head seizzors on his opponent,

Tm. 93. had elapsed in the seventh against which Browning wriggled round. Eustace appeared dazed until he broke away. Then Brown-

Ros

AT THE

LON CHANEY IN WEST OF ZANZIBAR

THURSDAYтOSATURDAY QUEEN'S At 290, 5.10, 7.15 & 9.20.

STAR

IRENE RICH

IN

BEWARE OF MARRIED MEN

With CLYDE COOK, AUDREY FERHIS, MYRNA LOY THURSDAY TO SATURDAY

AT 5.30 9.20.

W THE LAST FRONTIER

WORLD

Featuring WILLIAM BOYD, JACK HOXIE, MARGUERITE. DE LA-MOTTE, J. FARRELL MACDONALD

THURSDAY TO SATURDAY

Continuous Performance From 1.15 to 11.15.

THEATRE ROYAL

THE

WARWICK REVUE Co.

TO-NIGHT

TO-MORROW

SAT., OCT. 20TH

BOOKING AT MOUTRIE'S

with Sturmey Archer three-speed THE VAN VALEY CO. gear. His time of 61 hours 20 ininutes included all stops for food and rest, his average speed for the whole run being over 14 miles per hour.

BRIGHT SHOW AT THE

STAR..

A record of 59 years' standing was lowered at Herne Hill, London, last month, when G. Stole and V.

Hamlet" without the Prince is Andrews (Polytechnic Club) did generally conceded to be a rather the quarter-mile tandem (fying dull affair, but the Ruth Van Valey start; paced) distance in 24 4-5sec. The previous record, made by L. Company gave a very bright show Pearce and J. Wells, wag 25 4-5ser, at the Star Theatre, Kowloon, on Another record, the half-mile paced Tuesday' in spite of the fact that Landeri, standing start, was set up the by W. Burl and H. Grant (Imperi- al Wheelers), whose time was 55 3-05cc.. against the previous best of

57 1-15sec:

HIGH LIGHTS

THE MERRY GO ROUND

AIRY NOTHINGS

PRICES: 83, 82, 81.

A. STROK

ANNOUNCES

ONE APPEARANCE ONLY

OF.

MIGUEL

FLETA

Star turn was unable to appear. We were told by one of the company who appeared before the curtain that Miss Van Valey had been forbidden by her doctor to take part in the show, and we would do their best to give us a were assured that the company||PHENOMENAL SPANISH

olls evening despite this handi

tunity of throwing him about the ring until he secured the fall. The referee hesitated when Browning held Eustace in a body scissors, but as Eustace fell back he awarded cap. They certainly did. Browning the fall.

Their move- ments continued fast to the close,

Much better than the War- wicks!" said a member of the

TENOR

AT THE

when Browning seized the oppor- of the engagement, and the verdict audience after the performance THEATRE ROYAL

ing forced Eustace into a splits | (Continued at foot of next column), was well received.

THE WOMAN'S CORNER.

JEWELLED BACKS.

WHEN YOU WASH WOOLLENS.

Wool has two special properties which affect the washing process.

The first is shrinkage. There are probably several factors concerned

HERE'S A GOOD TIP,

Doubtless many people have had trouble with loose fountain pen caps. They fall off when one stoops and shoot off if one jerks the pen from the pocket.

AN AUTUMN VOGUE.

Special jewels have been design- ed to fill the gap of the new back tess evening dresses, The choker necklace will be important this autumn, especially in the evening, The chocker is, however, no longer simple string of gems encircling the throat, but an important or nament with a short pendant in the front and a glittering string of shrinkage. Certainly rubbing even ing the closed end between the jewels cascading down the back.

but you cannot compare the two shows, any more than the Georges Grossmith and Robey are compar- able. The Van Valey "Company. works on entirely different lines, and along those lines they work excelleatly well. Their show is an American vaudeville show, and a very good one it "is-from the slap-stick stuff" of their clever comedian, Rex Storty, to the serious instrumental and vocal work of Miss Esther Van Valey and Miss Kathrine Scott Conjuring and ] juggling, with comic effects, some excellent "character" impressions, clever sketches and seng-scenes, and a marionette show--the bull fight is a scream"-go to make

Remove the cap and hold it with Up a well-assorted programme which in shrinkage, but there is only one the open end about four inches from met with the warmest approval from cause. Shrinkage is produced by

a crowded house. a hot flame. Keep it in this posi-The Van Valey Company will be With some wools even rubbing. dry rubbing may produce the felt-

tion while you count fifteen. ing which is the actual root of

Fine brilliants form the choker in pure cold water is suficient. thumb and fingers of the right cordial welcome. There is plenty

portion of the necklace, and an im- To prevent shrinkage rubbing mense square-cut diamond is set must be avoided as far as possible, cornerwise at the end of the short and it should be recognised that front pendant, Square-cut dia. the hotter the soap solution, the monds also form the long string. more the shrinkage that will be pro- Pearl necklaces have gained new duced by a certain degree of rub beauty by being fastened with a bing.

hand, insert the warm end between the thumb and first, two fingers of the left hand.

playing for several nights on their and may rest assured of a very Then withdraw the cap, and hold. return to the Colony from Manila,

af fun, in the show of both the noisy and dumb variety; there is plenty of music both of the ultra- modern and the more sedite type; there is something doing" all the time. and with the added attraction of Miss Ruth Van Valey's dancing, the next appearance of this com-1 The opening will then be found pany will be something to look for

Twirl the cap by means of the right hand and apply a gentle, even preaure to the warm end with the left fingers. Allow to cool.

clasp that is also a pendant. The The second property of wool js brooch, earrings, and bracelet show that it absorbs alkali. Now soap to be slightly reduced in diameter. ward to. a modern setting for precious is a compound of fatty substances when quite cold replace the cap

stottes.

Old Italian jewellers, master craftsmen as they were, would open their eyes in wonder if they could see the skill of the modern gem- cutter. Where they had to take what they could get in the way of colour and shape and make up their pieces accordingly, the craftsman of to-day works out a design and hands it to the cutter to produce the gems.

All kinds of queerly-shaped stones are to be met with in modern jewels. A navette diamond, an oval with pointed ends. is often auspended from a row of twinkling-brilliants; the pearshaped briolet that looks like a drop of dew may be seen hanging at the end of a long ear ring.

and alkali. Wool in soap solution absorbs some alkali, destroying on the pen. part of the soap and leaving the fatty substances, which may settle on the wool.

SERVICE TO READERS.

Tuesday, Oct. 29, 1929 At 9.15 p.m.

AT THE PIANO : JOSE ANGLADA

"

· RESERVED SEATS: $6.00 UNRESERVED $8.00 Booking at MOUTRIE'S from WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 18.

SEASON'S

GREATEST

MUSICAL

EVENT.

(8510

NOTICE.

MIS

ISS VIOLET CAPELL

wishes to announce

THE HONG KONG DAILY she will be Returning from

This separation of fatty substan- tion, which should only be luke

PRESS. LTD., and the HONG. "ces from the soap is prevented if warm. Immerse the articles, work KONG WEEKLY PRESS, through

some soda or ammonia is present. gently about in the soap suds with their London Office. at 21, Bains | LONDON on the 22ND OCTO:

It is therefore beat, when wash- ing woollens, to have sode

no rubbing, but only gentle squeez | LANE, FLEET STREET. E.C. 4. sze pre- monia present in the wash liquor,

Am- ing.

pared to give Subscribers and BER and will be resuming When clean, rinse first in luke Visitors advice regarding accom and also to give the first rinse with

warm soda water, and then in cold 'modation available, motoring faci Water containing soda or ammonia, water. It is better to give two cold and the second rinse can be with rinses than one. In pince of soda tho water alone.

ities, suitable shopping centre, her DANCING CLASSES

FOR CHILDREN as From

one can use amigonis, just auffici. I, when at home, they will call Now for the washing process, ent to give a pleasant amell, for or telephone to the above address Dissolve one tablespoonful of wash- the wash and the first rinse.

they will receive the "utmost assist- ing soda in each bucketful of water.

Remember soap itself does not nee and the latest available infor Use this for making the soap solu«

cause shrinkage-rubbing is the mation on all subjects of enquiry (Oontinued at foot of next column.) cause.

·will be placed at their diposal.

the 1ST NOVEMBER

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