1953-07-13 — Page 4

USE ZOAPY FOR CLEANER "TRAINS

THE CHINA MAIL, MONDAY, JULY 18, 1953.

Ugh! These trains: does nobody care?

Londen, schoolboys and TV has cropped B.,C.'s late SUPPOSE complaining up there. The about British Railways pete with work or prep.

evening showings do not com- But is akin to kicking a man there are great complaints when he is down, but that it is all the other organised hobbles, clubs, and spare-time here goes, anyway.

the school pursulis in

which In the past few days. I've huve now been left high and been getting around quite a dry.

4

bit on the Southern and Midland Regions, my first UK. land travels in more than four years.

HR

Wanted: flair

JOWEVER much it may go The main impression is of against our national grain, the nithy state of the carriages, we really must set about learn Has the cleaning squad thrown ing a few tricks of showman- ship with which to face this competitive world.

was depressed to read that o British *3-D“ film eyt- tight on Broadway. Everything

R.M.MacColl's

anonymous source, containing 10,000 dollars-in crisp new bills.

This apparently shy circum- stanca set thern on the trail: and, through the bank which issued soon con- the bills, they were fronting the sender, a prosperous tusiness man in this eighties,

He explained that when he started in business, all those years before, he kept his own books. Recently the worry began to ng him that he might have made some tax errors in his own favour, and so, to play safe, he decided to send in the ten grand. A Bkely tale, declared the wustice boys. Sternly they im pounded his books of 50, years before and spent nearly a week going through them... The anding the business man had vasily overpald, and so his 10,000 dollars were returned to him--

COLUMN on underwent a disastrous first plus 5,000 dollars more.

In its hand entirely? Doesn't that could go wrong did in the anyone care any more?

Some small matters of detali which

can make or mar.

of the coaches I've travelled in were so thick

luckless grit

Lint I felt the passengers should have been sporting miners' helmets.

Military men

cnsure that

with grime and And the subjects chosen were shots from the dear old Festival repertoire. Who of Britain

those,

of appeal to

Broadway

thought that

to

things. would a tough

and restless the audience? in

Lake steps unlts maintain

smart appearance

toughest

conditions.

الم

3

Soldiers In contrast, Cinerama, one of

try 1o get in a regular shave the outstanding American 3-D and smarten-up even in the systems, is put over with maxi- heat nf the campaign.

Their mum showmanship.

The very

commanders know how impor- first act is a rip-roaring job

seem on in which you

tunt morale,

this has a hearing Well, if dinginess and dirt are The criterion, then the

morale

of British Railways must long ogo have been mislaid

siding.

FILM

to be

down the runway

Nor is it only the carriage hurtling interiors and windows. In the

of a precipitous Technicoloured Brst-class diner on the London switch-back.

With the women in the euglenes Manchester run the table silver

that stains reamed like fury the night I was so ill-washed from some former incal were was there, and from the mer all too evident on it. In such there came nervous laughter. conditions the menu charge of with that as a flying start, the

single glass of performance never Tööked back. Us. Bd. for a

champagne non-vintage

(you

245.

Jan

can buy a whole bottle of die vintage. London) seemed a jest.

stuff for

Outrivalled RYANSTON, in Dorset, be- lleves it is the first public school to Instal a cinema-sized

B

Not long fince, the US. Income TV screen for the benefit of tax authorities-very much on the whole school.

their tees these days, what with

on

"People who take their children for holidays in Spain want to leave them there,"

IN LONDON YOU'RE AT

THE HEART OF THINGS

to

Borneo, and that

London.

as I am concerned, are

By Beverley Baxter, MP

more

the

cdmit that

50

The only concession they ask is that the King shail now be call- ed Emperor.

·

SUPPOSE there are Rome people left in

Is it fatire? Cerlainly. Is it Paris, New York and

people from across the was with

than house nearly collapsed with prophecy? Undoubtedly Shaw's other great cities. The

that we laughter. I waters. The English, the ordinary interest

it vivid mind was penetrating the entire population of the Irish, the Welsh--and even heard that the Coronation is a locul joke, but then even future. Today Ainerica har

Lendon is a sort of village. The permanent bases on British ter world cannot have moved en the Scots, despite their play would be Shakespeare's Eart

Marshal, in charge of ritory. Australia, New Zealand masse

London. And

resentment about the Queen "Henry VIII" and that everything to do with this and America have concluded a yet...

being crowned Elizabeth Queen Elizabeth and the Coronation, is the present Duke defence pact without even ask-

of Norfolk.

Ing Britain to send an observer. Why did I never know the. Second--have come to Duke of Edinburgh would

But what did Shaw's King havo In the interval Henry VIII to say to the Ambassador? that my North London con- London in a great human attend the opening per-

An a was presented to the Queen, emphatic Not stituents, whom I have re- torrent. If only I had pro- formance. Merely Discredited

presented in Parliament for duced my ill-fated play of matter of routine I was sent who had her own Ideas upon the

make-up and costume, which Shaw, the Irishman, was sup- "It Happened in the customary two tickets

were based

Holbein's posed to have despised the upon eighteen years, have rein- 1942,

famous portrait. And

English, but that on a friend left tives and friends in every September," today, it would allotted to dramatic critics.

was, only 3. JUST before

the South Bank we watched the pose. He seldom left England Washington he sent me the country in the world, with be a sell-out. How do 1

Was real South rest of the

fascinating family and never went to Ireland if he following item, which might be

hilarity as the album evening, and then the could help it. And certainly in described as coming within the the possible exception of know? Because every other There

most of theatre is packed and mine Bank

in im- Queen, took her departure. the climax of "The Apple Cart" he puts into the mouth of the dog-strokes-man category.

them are now visiting Lon- would be the only play with audience arrived

maculate evening dress. It had been great fun, and King such wortis of tender yet don? Their wants, as far seats available.

and the Cockney youngsters even

policeman's stolid proud understanding that would commented irreverently horse filcked an ear as Elizabeth move the most ardent English- upon the splendour of it all. and Philip drove away to the baller to silence. A policeman on a placid who were staying up much too

Word Music and then get in to the gallery MORE than once in this horse gazed imperturbably late.

column I have, remarked upon the revelry. Other when Sir Winston Churchill that the theatre is perhaps policemen

But we were not finished with diverted the royalty on the stage. The very HEY say that Shaw is dead is speaking. Now unhappily, the one institution that traffic to avoid congestion, next night we were bidden to 1 and finished. It is not true. Sir Winston will not speak

the but there could not have the opening performance of He will live when most of his most clearly marks in Parliament until the difference between a metro-heen less pomp if it had been Shaw's "The Apple Cart"-at-the-in-books-of-reference. Only Noel Colvard's revival of contemporarles are mere names polis and a normal city. The a welcome for a local mayor. lovely Haymarket Theatre. Noel one

other writer, William brings the same

is still a great draw, and his Shakespeare,

had a

greater The public gallery of the cinema

first nights are always a glitter- sense of the musle of language The Queen House of Commons seats filma to the small town as

ing affair.

and its orchestration.

Again and again at the Haymarket I about 300 people, and this to the cities, and television has created a democracy of

Certainly the audience on this found myself being moved to reason about 3,000 people a

was a distinguished writer's dream.

occasion provided a gossip emotion by the cadence and day ask for tickets. Visiting viewers that is nation-wide. INSIDE the theatre, however,

the living

Here was the colour of the words, for like all theatre

50 audience not

much of kinsmen from overseas who flourishes only in Paris, New sociallies but of people who

Duchess of Kent, for once great writers Shaw could rather drably dressed, or so it alchemise prose into poetry. be 100 percent York and London because of hold high place in the world seemed to my non-professional renders of this column, are the density of population, of arts, Wisely the theatr

But the pageantry did not end pretty reasonable on the whole. They are willing to and the traditions of the opened its top gallery, only to eye. Lady Astor, home from with Shakespeare and Shaw.

An unlooked for switchered the recent unhappy scandals the usual complaint about received an envelope from

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în

simplicity itself. They only Living Theatre

require to be shown around the Houses of Parliament

Autumn.

appear to

on

2

In my sleep

But

centuries,

there

front of the circle.

and

shrill screams of ten small boys

her bout with Senator Mce very next night there was

DZ

10 and

Great Moment

the gala premiere of them, "Gilbert and Sullivan," followed by a huge party at the Savoy a Theatre, which was originally but

ле

semi-

the "regulars."

Was full of memories of settle

tour of the

Claudette Colbert Fifteen minutes after the Shaw. buildings, followed by an Nowhere in the world is audience was seated the Queen ed extraordinarily pretty. and Douglas Fairbanks, who hour in the public gallery, the living theatre so loved and her consort arrived even if Churchill is not as in London, despite the advanced to their place in the been knighted over hero

is cannot use the title unless he built to house those famous apeaking.

pessimists who have been traditional to father royalty, gives up his American citizen operettas. saying for several hundred but I must say Elizabeth looked ship, carried himself with the

I must say that theatre seats fresh, young and sweet. She is pensive modesty

are not an ideal arrangement years that it is dying. And, a giri although a wife, a a royalty.

for taking liquid and solid re- of course, when an event mother

Queen. Pallip.

freshments, but we did our best, like the Coronation comes who had just won his wings as

Sir Alexander Korda, the Hungarian who was knighted the along, the London theatro is an RAF plot, looked fit and MY wife asked me

well, and managed to suggest

carly in the war by Churchill to ensure with some subtlety that while other evening if I was shrewd enough

making for

the aim of Nelson its unwell and had better see a that

offerings

and are he was only the consort he was SAM Goldwyn was peculiarly

Lady Hamilton, -moved allent, Gilbert young lady's undoubted

and even among his guests with a pen- seems that in calculated to make

peculiarly talkative, with emotions husband,

sive, smiling melancholy, The my sleep I was saying: contact

the dramatic critics looked as it

Gilbert and Sullivan dlm had After the National Antiem (I at any moment they might en cost an awful lot of money, and "This is where Charles I was engendered by that great tried by Cromwell and his event.

wonder if the Queen ever tires Joy themselves. As for peers it has yet to be demonstrated of that tune) wo applauded and peeresses, they were dotted whether the younger generation friends. Just over there."

loud and long and then turned all over the place.

on both sides of the Atlantic will was where Guy Fawkes, the

care a hoot about mailing the only man who

And what is the theme of this ocean blue or taking a pair of ever had a

25-year-old play which

In- sparkling eyes. cidentally, I attended ot It is not a great play, which birth when Cedric Hardwicke

doctor. It

practical plan for reforming

Old Vic

some the

Parliament, placed his bar: ONE of the most cherished

to the business of the night.

the story of Henry VIII sired the first Elizabeth.

who

that

Buy

However,

Miler

was

a

NO

Compensations

of our London theatres is is probably one of the reasons rels of gunpowder. When- over

the Old Vic, which flourishes it is performed so seldom, but, played the leading role? It is the a reigning Monarch

story of an imaginary King purista

of England in the 1920's. de- dies they bring the body on the unfashionable south then the

against Sending his throne here to Westminster Hall" side of the river near the Shakespeare shared the author-

slp with Fletcher. spot where Shakespeare

we were not so concerned with rebellious Parliament. It is good to meet one's used to hold forth in his the authorship

the as with

With kinsmen from overseas, and Globe Theatre. The Old Vic drama within the dramaticence. Shaw invaded · the had listened to Shakespeare even better to meet one's was run on a shoestring in the amorous antics of a king of

Queen of England watching Palace with a satirist's pen, but the South Bank, where he lit

kinswomen, and I love to see the years between the wars, England. their interest in everything. and it was a great sight to But you just cannot put an watch the cloth-capped ocean into a pint bottle, and Cockneys drinking, tea or that is what we have been sucking lollipops while

Local Joke

So I return to the beginning of my theme--the part that the theatre plays in the life of Lon- an utter lack of re- don. On successive nights we on

In fairness he used the same per the

of his immortality, wo with devastating effect upon the had p

soon the. cantankerous politicians. In the last act genius of Bernard

Show decry Shaw

unleashed his great the accusation that he died for moment, which, strangely, is for over when his body was lower- more topical today than when it

the grave, and we had was written. asked to do this year. Come arguing with each other THE coronallon of Henry and for a showdown with the Prime Sullivan on the very stage that

The King, waiting ed to

drunk thé fiealth of Gilbert and Ann Boleyn is not shown on Minister and his Cabinet. Is saw the first performance of again next year and the whether Mr Smith was year after, when there will good Hamlet or a blarated the stage but we hear the com- visited urgently by the Ameri- their operatias.

ment of one of the actors who can Ambassador. be more room. Britain is an washout. But in the last war wiping his forehead, said that

Yes, there are compensations island that loves. to be Hitler destroyed the place he had come

from the Abbey 17

His news is sensational. The, in living at the heart of things, visited, and we who dwell and it was rebulit with could not get another finger have decided to revert to their murky toge

Go crowded yout Government of Washington.even if the milling crowds anti sometimes send here are proud of the riches Stato funds and endowed as into the place. When mother bestowed on us through the woll ́ ́

octor, gazing at the audience former status of British Colonies! one's mind philandering with The frontier between Canada, the idea of a house on a hill beneficence of the ages.

while he supposedly watched the, and the USA is to be abolished overlooking a lake or the sea, Famous actors play for coronation procession, asked who th

In fact, all frontiers in the Com{ where tha, majesty" of nature that fellow was on the horse,

be abolished, Americans and the immemorial rocks look wah imagined that the Corona actors without a 'name get of Norfolk him that wants to their dollars are to now freely disdain - upon (our fleeting; tion fover affected only the their chance. Therefore it bo called Earl Marsha},” the wherever the British ang nies, immancy of the good carth,g

which was

However, it must not be nominal salaries, and young and his friend answered monwealth and Empire are to provides its own cathedral, anti

:

MARCUS CHEKE, ARBITER

By George Hutchinson

HEN A new Ambas.. sador arrives in Lon- don, it is Marcus Cheke who welcomes him.

No traveller haunts nur air- ports and our stations moro avidly than he.

courtier

Cheke Is a compound of and diplomat, Vica- Marshal of the Diplomalle Corps: ard head of the Foreign Offico protocol department.

In his protocol department, Cheke and a staff of six scTVO more than 900—the foreign. diplomats, great and small, in London They record · diplo matic arrivals, departures, pro- motions, and compile a monthly directory.

They ensure that diplomats have their privileges and Immunities, they guide and advise in the lore and laws of England. They are the arbiters of etiquette, the masters of procedure,

For Cheke himself (salary £2,000 a year) the social result in formidable; he is incessantly 0: gugeri at Ambassadorial

ct partits, Tumch, cocktaila, dinner. I doubt if there is a diplomatic reception to which he and Mrs Cheke are not Invited

AS

Of course they enjoy com- pary, or the years sinco 1840- when he became Vice-Marshal- would have been unbearable. But they have suffered tedium, Cheke has acknowledged 100, in a confidential guide for young diplomata, In this, the Vice- Marshal addresses himself to: John Bull, newly arrived in his first Embassy, and Mrs Bull.

are

"One of their chlef dulles," . writes Cheke, "will be to bo affable

to bores. There always to be found at official. purtles some personages whose rank and influence have caused them to be invlied, but who are devoid of social greces and con- !

stand around in dreary

sequently Isolation."

With the social gracea, Cheko himself is shiningly endowed. He has a reputation for good talk. Pale-faced and tall; 40 years old, he dresses well but not toppishly, and wears coats with velvet collore,

He has a taste for writing, and published his first book- "Papilice," a novel-while he was an undergraduate at Trinity

College, Oxford

But young Cheke nursed a longing for Parliament. And at 23, a Liberal, he contested New Forest and Christchuren: 11,320 voted for him—but 22,122 voled for the Tory.

Two years later, in 1931, Cheke became a diplomat, an attache In our Embassy at Lisbon. He served later in Brussels, thenTM returned to Portugal. Immersed In the history of the Peninsula, he wrote two books.

And in Portugal Cheka mar❤ ried alter an engagement of three months. Mrs Cheke is a dster of Lord Roborough, Thero are no children.

From their fint In South Ken- sington the Vice-Marshal usually cycles to his office (though he owns a car). He has a light-- weight

advanced con bicycle of struction. I cannot describe the refinements of engineering that

it' distinguish

from lesser bleycles; but Mr Cheke can. He knows his bicycle as a courtier knows his protocol.

POCKET CARTOON

by OSBERT LANCASTER

“Say, do "we", still stock "Uncis Tom's Cabin" ve dià is go in the lan; purge?”