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Every Wendnesday in the Telegraph:
T
Sitting on the
NHE middle classes are used to being kicked around by governments. After all, who are they?
They may cure the sick, teach the young, write most of the books, paint most of the pictures, compose most of the music, fill the universlties with their professors, provide most.. of the entertainment, pay most of the taxes, and find their sons always In the van. of our defences when
some foreign upstart periodicnity | threatens the country, but, neverthe- less who are they from the point of view of any government?
They are the people who never complain, and are therefore hardly worth consideration.
Moreover, their voting power is though wiser statesmen have metimes noticed that their in- fluence is strong
Fence
by NATHANIEL GUBBINS
IN AND OUT OF IN AND
PARLIAMENT
By Ernest Thurtle, M.P.
INDOUBTEDLY the next General Election, though possibly nearly two years ahend, begins to cast its shadows at Westminster,
Perhaps it is for this reason that I find little dissent among my colleagues from what I may call the Morrison directive on futuro Labour strategy.
thew
Broadly this is consolidation of present gains, accompanied by careful preparation for a further advance, with the cautionary proviso that such. further advance must be of a strictly limited .character.
*
MR MORRISON has, in my judgment, a re- markable capacity for sensing the prevalent public mood.
His view now appears to be that people are more anxious to be assured that what has been done so far is sound 'than to be asked to pass judgment on new things to come.
Between now and the general election the Morrison aim (a wise one, I think) will be to provide them with that assurance.
TUIE petite, and studious-looking member for North Lanark, Miss Margaret Herbison, is a great contrast to the forthright and for- midable Mrs. Braddock, the Liver- pool member she has displaced on the Labour Executive.
Her constituency is a mining Arca onco represented by Miss Jennie Lee. A teacher by profession, Miss Herbison makes speeches which reveal a well-ordered mind. Into her 41 years she has con- trived
to crowd a good deal of She is not likely perous, but will probably make a to bo obatre- useful member of the ruling body.
*
could possibly be one of the Devon-service for her party. shire fluffs, who, in my young days, used to style themselves "fluff-fluff," two small "s" with a hyphen.
The one I remember would quile old now,
though I should imagine still handsome, with long grey fur and fine eyes and quite a lady killer before the people he lived with decided that late nights were not good for his health,
to rear several handsome
ANCIENT issue though it was,
the Nonni telegram provided the Commons with a lot of exclie- ment
Oliver Stanley, gifted master of ralllery and banter, had. In this I remember how much it was an ideal subject, and he soon had regretted that he was not destined the House in a rollicking mood,
He has what may large families as
be called a fatal facility for this kind of witty as aristocratic as badinage. and
Members, foes and friends alike, As he appears from his letter to delight in his quips. And the modern
and as he classless society delivers them he has every ap. difficult to endure and seems in pearance of enjoying himself. need of a companion of the same age and breeding as himself, I won- der if he would consider meeting ot one of the old haunts
two and three
himself.
who wandered into a village on the over lasts between Zambesi river, drank 20 gallons of months, nalive beer, fell against a tree, which Hoping your wife and family are colapsed, and slept the rest of the well. night in the wreckage, the following notes on elephants and alcohol may be of interest to the general public. Although there is no evidence that
I remain, sir,
Yours faithfully,
A. Elephant.
Lottie's case book over old times? dictatorships
That is why all destroy the middle classes first. They call them "the Intellectuals" and their criticism "reactionary,"
-
that'
*
In to talk for him there is a snag
this success. Parliament
(maybe sho
#
of the avery suc-
alcoholism among elephants is on the
there is no doubt increase, clephants, being of a self-critical,
If he was the young Sir flaff-suff | little prim). Is suspicious Lottle, cat columnist, writes: Ever I first met at the Dustbin Club in witly humorist, and melancholy dis- introspective and
Theatre and sometimes drinking as well in the
statesman.
**
since I published a letter from position, are inclined to bouls DL
"Almost a Gentleman," a louclu cat Oxford before he was sent down for caful crack which brings down the excessive drinking when the oppor- whose unfortunate condition makes an affair with "Tibs" who used to House is apt to take something tunity occurs." So, before we
him unwelcome in female society, it behind the bar in a pub off away from the speaker's reputation kneeling are all
also us a serious politician. will before a oft. portrait of handsome
As you will realise, such oppor- my postbag has been full of similar The High, I expect he
But perhaps Oliver Stanley does Harry Palilit, and before writers tunities
are rare, as our size pre cases, all asking if I can advise then remember "Boo Eyes," the white.
on how to make friends and lead Persian We used to meet in the not care about this. I hope he does and artists are
vents us from entering public houses told what to do by
dressing-rooms of
not, for we should not like him half the Vaudeville
guise of solemn some gorilla in the Ministry of Cul- or even large hotels. We are there a fuller and more useful life.
I am afraid I can add little to saucer of milk or gnawing a chicken ture, may this column ask why this fore inclined to take full advantage present Government of all Govern- of a chance, such as the one re- the advice I have already given, bone in the kitchen at Rules in ments of Britain har
socked ments
the ported..
but have great pleasure in printing Malden-lane. manual worker by increasing the
this letter from a cat signing him- Twenty gallons of native beer, self "Sir Puss-Puss," and sincerely much in common, even if he is not into this sorry affair
Anyway, I daresay we shall have➜EFUSAL of an official Inquiry price of his beer in the 1848 Budget7
warm and lasting friendship the same cat; and as I would greatly think, weil Jusüfled. Manual workers are not the sort which is of high alcoholte content, hope
was, I of people to be kicked around by sounds a lot, even for an elephant, will be the result of it.
appreciate his help in writing a book The matter was, as the Lord anybody unless they are unlucky four legs to stand on instead of two,
to be called "The Good Old Days, President argued, essentially an in- enough to be Russians.
I hope he will read this letter and ternal concern of the Labour Party communicate with me.
Unfortunately the closing "stages" of the debate reflected litile credit on the House in general or Labour in particular.
It is true that the manual worker has been handed back some income tax to pay for it, but increasing the price of his beer is no way to retain, his affections or his voles.
Unless, of course, Sir Stafford Cripps, virtuous as an Jeoberg him- self, thinks that, in the country's interests, the manual worker will be happy to come home at night to a game of cribbage and a cup of cocon.
⭑
until it is realised that we hove
in
short-while-ago-1- read- two narrow feet, flat or not. and four round flat feet instead of DEAR MISS LOTTIE,
your Interesting article a letter from Although we have no arms to a cat called Sir fluff, spelt with a embrace lamp posts, we have a trunk small "," and am wondering if he which will encher us to trees in o grave emergency.
It must also be realised that as our bodies and blood stream are much vaster than a man's body and blood stream, the time taken for the fumes of alcohol to pass from the stomach to the bruin is much longer. Therefore, we have a better chance
Sincerely Bir Puss-Puss
C.V.R. THOMPSON reports the U.S. scene
NEW YORK.
strike demands against the nation's ➜ATIONING of petrol and fuel oil:
Congressional
railways. On an Inside pago is a Rwithin six months is predicted American working man, story of the same union in the at already earning the highest
committee
in world history, wants capacity of employer. It owns an Investigating the oil shortage.
not
hotel outside Čleveland where the workers went on strike against the union
are
the
men not
hus fold to worry
merely a limp vegetable growth of no use except to the appearance. Experts a woman, Miss J. V.. Sheppard, of Chicago.
"Had a good day at the cool face, to drink our fin before we pass out. wages dear?" asked the miner's wife.
"Absolutely topping. I did much different elephants, as it does on
Alcohol has a different effect, on more.
UOTE from General of better than Alfred, who is still a bit of a toper despite the higher village on the Zombest river were profits in world
different men.
Army Dwight D. Eisenhower, The natives of the Big industry, making the largest price of beer."
history, will not Their complaint: "They
former Supreme Allied Commander, "He'll come to
that no good, will
very fortunate
the elephant give him more.
anti-union and warned us we will former Chief of Staff, now President Alfred. I don't know what the Coal who drank their beer knocked down
lose our jobs if we dare to strike." of Columbia University, New York- So this summer America. is facing Board must think of him."
only one tree and went quietly to its worst strike wave yet. Organised Replied the Engine Drivers' Union "So long as I live I shall most readily "As a matter of fact, they think sleep. he's a bit of rotter. It really isn't
labour has not been in such an ugly "Not at all, but we won't let them answer to the name of Ike." Some rogue elephants in a state mood since the middle thirtles, say run the business their own way." good enough with the country in of intoxication will uproot all the
the experts. its present state."
frees round the village, trample the "And there's you
NEGROES can go to white churches A HEALTH EXPERT saving your houses to bits, and sling the villagera
It is
American Communism. The Nin Americe now. At any rate, about getting bald because hair is money and getting fliter every day into the river.
working man thinks it is his last man-made covenants to bar them to hew more coal: Here's yout
chance to win before an anti-Labour from Church property were declared supper, love,"
As the opportunities for an ele-Government gels in. "What, delicious boiled cod again? phantine "binge" (If I may use the
Invalid by the highest U.S. court. How absolutely serumptious."
expression) occur to infrequently, Nearly 2,000,000 workers may be "It's cheaper than meat and we there is no data available on the involved. There is even talk, still ALTER WINCHELL, the can put the money into National effects of progressive or habit-in the maybe stago, of general columnist, bas started on Savings. And after that, we cast
forming alcoholism In clephants, strike.
another anti-British splurge
has dropped have a nice cup of cocoa and a though it is known that once the
British sny
the B.B.C. newa programmes Industries which will game of cribbage."
taste is nequired an elephant will
definitely contribution: "If the display great cunning in the satis-phone, rubber. pil, maritime, glase, to the Russians, it is probably only, station.
Its municipal broadcasting be affected: Cars, electrical, tele they are not sending any more stuff from
Bernuse Mayor Williamız faction of his craving.
shipbuilding, coal.
because the Arabs cannot spare it." O'Dwyer is an active Zionist, Zionists claimed a victory for their SAFETY DEVICE which-tells the Boycott Britain movement. The motorist when his car is on the wrong side of the road's white line Programmes were too blased, ex- fact, they is being tried out in New Jersey, plained a columnist, In
reason they AMERICA'S front pages are When the car's tyres pass over the were dropped for the quotes from the Engine Drivers' line a loudspeaker says: "Get over, are always dropped at this time of. Union arguing the justice of their get over.".
year-atmospherics.
"Oh, noody, goody, goody," said the miner. "Oh, poody, goody."
Letter from an
elephant
There was the case of the elephant who remembered the date of art Big business is talking tough, and African chief's birthday and always acting tough. At this time, it is made an embarrassing appearance | saying, the country cannot atarct when, the beer was, being served. another round of pay rises.
Apart from lack of opportunity one of the main reasons why cle Regarding the account published phants rarely become confirmed in the London Press.of an elephant alcoholics is that an elephant's hang-
DEAR SIR,
D
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