Saturday,
WEEK-END WIT
DENSE TAR
Anilor, unexpectedly back 151 port, found his wife, dressed up in her best party frock.
"That's the spirit," he told her. "No need to look gloomy, though we are at war.
Just then the telephone bell rang and the nnllor answered it.
"Oh yes, judging by the number of U-boats we've sunk, I should cer tainly think so." his wife heard film say. Then she poked him who had called,
"Oh, he said, "just a fellow who wanted to know if the const was clear,"
•
TOUGHI-LOOKING,
Wife: "There's a man outside who wants to see you about collecting n. bill. He wouldn't give me his name."
Husband:
like?"
"What does he look
Wife: "He looks Ike you had better pay it."
NER FATE
And then there was the pretty girl who married an Egyptologist, anti ended up is a mummy.
*
WILD VILLAGE
Visitor: "I hear you have à curfew in your town, and a bell is rung at- nine o'clock."
Resident: "They used to, but they've stopped it now. I woke everybody up."
STOP-GAP JOB
A kind-hearted woman, was visit- Ing the prison and stopped to look at
a young man who sat disconsolately on his cell bunk.
SIMPLE METHOD
HONGKONG TELEGRAPH
"It's astonishing to me how
POCKET CARTOON the old fashioned women used to
"Now remember-the moment the warning goes you come
right down!"
RIGHT PLACE
Staggering Into a Chinese laundry, he asked the proprietor: "Is this a hand Inundry?"
"Yes, sir, it is," replied the Chinese, "Well, wash my hands."
She wrote
IN
咖
stick to their men through thick and thin."
He: "It's simple....they used to paste them once in a while."
·
OPPORTUNITY
mcmber of his orchestra In the
July 26, 1941.
BOOK OF THE WEEK GIRL'S WATCH
IN CHINA
while
In "Dawn. Watch In China", by the people, who stoically (Houghton, Mislin Co., Boston return again and again to ri- One day Willem Mengelbera, the U.S.§3). Joy Homer describes bulld their homes and streets famous Dutch conductor, met graphically her varied ex and, in some cases, their whole journeying city, with no more than their periences through both Free China and inherent optimism and genuine Japanese-occupied territory dur- wense of humour. are tragically ing the present hostilities Sent realistic. to China in the fall of 1938 as a reporter for the United Ameri-
street and remarked, "My, my, but yes jook prosperou How do you manage 17
"Oh, I'm a busy man," reled the musician. Besides playing in the orchestra, I play in a quartet, give lessons, and perfum on the radio.
"When do you sleep?” inquired the curious conductor.
"During the rehearsals," was the
reply.
FEELING. SICK
Daughter
nil of Sidney can Relief Boards, she saw first- Louise IIomer, and only twenty- haul the devastation wrought by three when she came to China, famine, flood and war, the suffer the author makes light of her ing and the tragedy of it, on own hardships, strange experi: her journeys through all but ences and narrow escapes from three of China's provinces, death, and unintentionally re- As she travelled mile by mile, understanding of all kinds of veals hier imodesty, courage and on foot, donkey, truck or train, or by sampan, plane or junk, That's what I'm golug to the bos- Miss Homer was awakened to pital to find out." ་
n
"My husband had powder-pull and a pair of stockings in his pocket when he cane hame last night."
"Did he have any explanation to offer?"
LEAF SERVICE
First Blonde: Father walked in while I was entertaining my boy friend.
❤
AN EVENT, ALL RIGHT Lanark, Mrs Helen Rahp, THE SAME CAUSE
Mrs Ray Tipton, Mrs Helen Olson, the Rev. and Mrs Peter Sorensen are to her boy friend: announcing the approaching mar- can come to see me rage of their daughter, Miss Martha, Papa's at home, but to David. Wolf, which will be an with a swollen font, event of May 4 in Trinity Lutheran
church-Clinton (Iowa) "Herald."
"How came you to be in this un- fortunate situation, my pour young marvel
Bho asked gently,
ma'am," he said, "Darling, you "Well, you "I was working in a bank, and... this evening.
"Ah, I understand," she interrupted he is laid tip with pity. "Temptation, and in- Understand?" adequate pay-How long had you
been working in the back before ing. I'm laid up on account of your
you got into trouble?"
"One night, ma'am.”
PROBLEM
ZOOLOGIST'S NIGHTMARE
A certain zoologist, having aupped overwell, dreamed of reptiles. He arose the follow- ing morning to find that there had flowed over from the sub- conscious to the conscious state these facts of memory?
(1) That one particular saurian had appeared twice, his name occur- ring in the list once in full, and once by taking the first letter of the first
He replied: "Can't come this even-
dad's swollen foot. Understand?”
Frank Impressions
people.
is
.
Birth of Nationalism the great migration to the un- developed west, the new idealism Throughout the book one is which seized China after she aware of the Chinese nationalism slowly but surely became united against a common which enemy, the vast reconstruction growing out of the chaos and Second Blonde: I'll bet your heart plans, the successful industrial suffering, a sincere desire of the leaped to your mouth!
First Blonde; Gosh, no. He leap-co-operatives, and, most ad- Chinese to fight for their coun- mirable of all the courage of the try, and fresh enthusiasm and ed to the window.
Chinese nation, their quiet de- hope for the social reforms termination and their new-found which have already begun to find patriotism..
concrete expression in the schools and universities and homes for warphans; mass She relates in a frank man- education for the working class: ner her vivid impressions of the farmers' credit societies which things she saw while in the are formed with government Chinese front lines, behind the loans as part of an agricultural Japanese lines with the gueril- movement, and the New Life las, in fever-stricken areas, when Movement inaugurated by a target for Japanese machine- Madamo Chiang Kai-shek, which gun fire, driving a supply truck was teaching them western over a thousand miles into the methods of sanitation and good. Northwest, helping with first-aid health, improved farming, até. and relief work after air raids In reading "Dawn. Watch in and during the Tientsin flood, China", one feels that the slow and interviewing some of trak of man-power, machinery, China's warlords as soon as she hope and ideas to the West, is had mastered enough of the like the ebb of a wave drawing language to do so.
back, steadily gaining momen-
·
•
PHILOSOPHY OF LIVING
Do right, and tear no men; Don't write, and fear no women.
CONTRACT How to Play
BRIDGE How
By JOSEPHINE CULBERTS
Twenty-six Cards
VERAGE players are enormously
Needless to say, South
"bid
1:13
A handicapped by their habit of heat off" to reach the slam contract. regarding the duminy
ns an
nere I was marvellously lucky to find auxiliary, often useful in protecting North with high diamonds instead of or building tricks for their own hand, but hardly to be looked on
worthless spade honours. It'must be equally important Unit.
admitted, however, that South's play Aside
from habit there is no basis of the hand compensated for his out- for this conception. Dummy's tricks rageous optimism in the bidding. count just as much on the score as
name, the second of the recond, and declarer si, teclorer's hand and cum- clarer rutted, entered dummy with
so on to the end..
10 think of (2) That another of the replies as wo
In fact,
fact, it is a mistake West opened the spade king. De-
separate entities.
diamond, The
ม and ruffed second was repeated
niso appeared twice, but that histy-six cards should be subtly spade. This process
name was written backwards,
In a declarer's mind and a with the second diamond honour and plan of operation selected on that a third spade, and then Dummy's tats. The contract in to-day's hand king of clubs was used as entry for (3) That while the names of the would be baffling to every one who the ruff of the last spade with the reptiles had ercaped_the_dreamer, hel
|-is-n-vietim-of-habit-
could remember the position of the North dealer.
vowels and consonants in cach name. the order in which they appeared, and one single letter of the name of the saurian referred to in (1) above. Compatted to paper, using O for ali the vowels and X for all consonants, his problem read thus;
ххохохоох
XXOXOX
OXOXOXX
XOO-XOXXXXOXXOX
OXOXOXXO
XOXOXX
XOXXOXOX
XXOXOXOXO XOXOXOXXOX
The zoologist sat down to puzzle this out and after a little time dis-. covered the names of the reptiles, The names appear on Page 12.
Both sides vulnerable.
0 0 10.
A8742 VKQJ OAK G
K53
MAKQ
10 V002
N
IW E
J9653
JJ87
S
Q1098
A.10873
0432
AJ701
North Enst South
INT Глав 3
1♡
West PASH Dbl.
Dbl.
The bidding:
Pass 54% Pass Pass t♡
Pass
Гава
PARN
acc_of_trumps-South's lost trump then was led and dummy's K-Q-3. were played, declarer discarding his losing diamond and one club.
Now
low club was led from dummy and declarer nonchalantly put on his seven.
West won with the nine, but had nothing left bul clubs and, therefore, had to lead away from his queen up to South's tenare.
Of course, it was also lucky for the declarer that West had held only two diamonds, since otherwise he would have been able to exit sufely, But the fact remains that the hand was played correctly, on the basis of the bidding, and the one opportunity grasped for fullling the over-
ambitious contract. The crux was the conversion of dummy's three trumpe into the master trump kold-
ing.
Her descriptions of the air turn for the moment when it will caids and the way they are taken flow forward again. ...
Che SNAPSHOT GUILD
PICTURING CHILDREN
"Tell me,
doctor.
About disinfectants-for personal use, I mean, Surely à is unwise to uso strong, staining. chemicals that have to be measured so carefully! What is good that Is really pleasant as well...?'
Nothing better was ever discovered for women than Dettol, the modern antiseptic. This highly efficient killer of germs will not stain linen, and is clean and clear, pleasant in smell and an excellent deodorant. 'Dettol' is non-poisonous, and is gentle and tender on human tissues, Ask your Doctor Buy a bottle from your chemist and be ready.
DETTOL
TRADE MALE
THE MODERN
ANTISEPTIC
FREE: A post-card to Messrs. Imperial Chemical Industries (China) Ltd., Hongkong, will bring you a copy of o ittle book of interest to every woman, entitled "Modern Hyglene for Women."
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CAN YOU TELL YOUR HUSBAND BY HIS KISS ???
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The MAN WHO LOST HIMSELF
with
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Based on the novel by H. De Vere Stacpoola - Associate Producer: Ben Hand Directed by EDWARD LUDWIG Produced by LAWRENCE W. FOX, İr A UNIVERSAL PICTURE
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Story-telling platures of children are okey to make. They're not only
A
more lifelike, but far more appealing.
· FRIEND of mine, who is an ar dont amateur photographer, re contly showed me quile a collec tion of pictures he had snapped of his children over a period of years. Ono.thing I noticed in particular- there were very low stiffly posed "record" shots, 'He had endeavoured to make each picture tell a story of nome kind, to deplet some activity in the lives of his children-tho story-telling type of snapshot.
* The typical "record" shot has its place la any album or collection of snapshots, but they should be con sidered the oxception and not the ruto. It is true that in this kind of picture.taking.you get a good like. Boss of the child as far as facial expression is concerned, but you don't have a real story tolling pic.. turs of this activo litlis youngster. I just ten't natural for a healthy, sprightly child to stand around do Ing nothing.
Play makes pictures. I don't main that the child should bo'acurrying around or eigngod fa somo fast moving activity, liavo your child "repairing" his tricycle, reading a book, playing with dolls, sailing a boat in a wash tub, and with his pot always an appealing. natural shot. Then you'll bara a better and a more lateresting album.
This appealing picture of the 11t tlo girl baking a bio was takon with- the aid of photo lights, replacing tho togular-bulbs in home lamps, (and alded: by handy: cardboard redactors. High speed fim' was used In the dameTA MEG A BUSpshot ozuo-
euro was given. This is but one of a serios abowing the chlid trom the time she started making her plɑ un- til she look it out of the oven. An Interesting cories of pletures like this should bo cherished by any parent.
The arrival of summer offers in- numerable pictare opportunities for outdoor snapshots of children. With your camors always ready for no tion you can capture many of their latoresling activities. Oftentimes, a tempting idea-playing jacka, ekip ping rope, shooting marblos-will be all that is nooded to got things golog. Of course, the focus, expo Buro Botting, and camera position should be determined in advance. A bandy exposure guida will be a valuable aid in gelling well exposed pictures.
"Posing action” is a trick you can often use in picturing children. Sup- poso, for example, you want a plo tura of your son riding, his tricycle, but your camera will not take fast moving objekta. Ask him to show you, how he looks when he goos racing down the streal,' and, as' bo leans over the handle bars, snap the pieturo, 'to' like manner, many Interesting."action", aliota can be posed but the final print will con voy all the feeling of motion.
Snapshots of children" "doing
· something" give you a 'patural and genuino likedona. Alake many "story-telling: ploturen eu possible, and notion how the appeal of your album is greatly inorgused."
John Yan Quilder
N.Y.K.
LINE
SAN FRANCISCO & LOS ANGELES via Honolulu
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