DONALD DUCK
SSST! HEY, BUDDY....
WANTA BUY A
PICTURE BY
REMBRANDT?
I'LL SELL IT FOR TEN DOLLARS.
INCLUDIN THE
FRAME!
REMBRANDT! I'LL TAKE IT!
Cope, 1940) Walt Dheery Production. 6-18 World Riches Rewrved
Thursday,
HONGKONG TELEGRAPH
OH, BOY! A PICTURE BY
REMBRANDT'S
WORTH-1
"August 1940.
Court
By Walt Disney
SUMMER
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MAGAZINE
PAGE
THE TALE
TALE OF AN
OF AN UNCOMBED Bridge
This is about Jonathan Snow. You remember him?.
Jonathan Snow
Was op-
prenticed to the barley-stick curling trado at an early age. He might have flourished at this, but unfortunately he de- veloped the pornicious habit of twisting the sticks of barloy- sugar to the loft, instead of to the right, and was dismissed with ignominy,
BUT
UT you must remember Jonathan Snow and tho epitaph written by an illiterate friend of his which does not make it any the less poignant:
"Poor Jonathan Snow
Away did go
Over the ragen main.
With other mails
For to catch walls
And ne'er was seen agane." Anyway, when Jonathan was dismissed from the barley-stick curling factory with ignominy all he had were the clothes he stood up in and the ignominy which he wore in a
chamois-leather bag next hin skin,
He was an orphan, of course. All his people were aphans. It was fatul to be a parent in the Snow family, and Jonathan vowed, while still youth, int he would never become parent.
Later he altered the vow alight- ly. He vowed he would own up to being a parent. This saved him a lot of bother in after years,
Snow experienced a number of vicissitudes before his disappear- ance. He was standing miserably on the waterfront one day when n tall man with a beard approaches him.
"Would like to catch whales?" said the stranger.
Brain Teasers
Here are some more brain -teasers.The answers are in
column 5.
1. What is the M.O.I.? 2. "What is your new tele- phone number?" said George to Helen.
"I can always remember," she said, "because it consists of four different figures in descending order of value (not necessarily consecutive num- bera) and happens to be daddy's car number reversed. Moreover, the two numbers added together come to 14553. What is her telephone num- ber?
3. You've heard of the Gestapo, or German Secret Police. Who is at the head of, this organisation?
4. What was the name of the Belgian who became fam- ous when he went out to meet the approaching German Army at Brussels in 19147 He died this month.
5. What does "Der Tag" mean
in English?
Through the... through
the vales
Softly coo the doves;
But...
#nics
That.
blow the vernal
youthful loves!
The missing words have the sure six letters. Can you find them?
7. In which Russian port did the Bremen hide when chased by the Royal Navy?
6. Who Is the Finnish Foreign Minister? His name was men- tioned many times on the radio during the days of Rusto-Finnia) tension.
9. Who are the "Wrons"? 10. Cronto onagrams from the following:
"See RN.'s glant battle ship": "This cuckoo has no nest." 11. What was the date when Hiller attacked Poland? "
BEACHCOMBER
"I'm the best bounder on the island," said Jonathan
"Watch mc,"
"Why? Have you lost some?" asked Snow.
The stronger theri slugged Snow with a section of gaspipe and the next thing he know was that he was at sea In the fo'c'sle of n whaling ship.
The
captain
Was known 13 Bluck McGinty, and he had habit of bashing members of the crew in the face with whatever happened to be handy. Naturally, this made it pretty monotonous for the cre
crew.
Snow, however,
was o hardy
lad, and soor he was diving over- board stranging whales with his bare hands ond tossing them onto the deck.
In an excess of zeal one day he overdid things. He started throw- ing them aboard two at a time. The ship couldn't take it,
and down she went.
That much 15 known. What
Ho thon bounded.
happened to Snow has been a mystery up till now.
He was washed up on an island. and found that food was abundant on the island, so he set about building a hut,
Not knowing anything about the. native
flora, he attempted to chop down a nalive rubber-tree. The Axe rebounded and cut his leg off the waist, seriously Incon- veniencing him.
at
Thereupon he decided to make himself a wooden leg, and gnawed the tree down with his teeth. I told you before he was a hard
roan.
Once again his choice of timber unfortunate, because overy TEA
time he put his artificial leg down -ho used to bounce into the air.
But he soon gol used to this,
So long as he landed on his face he was all right. Landing on his feet meant, of course, that be just
મ
had to keep on bouncing. His Problems
pro.
gress was perforce somewhat er- ratic.
It didn't do his face much good, either, but Jonathan was tough. He could take it. He counted it
a lucky day when he could jand
on something soft.
It was on one of his lucky days that he met a dusky maiden called Oolalo.
She saw him bounding about and asked, with quiet dignity, "What's the big idea?"
Jonathan was pink with embar- rassment.
"I beg your pardon, blast you!" he said in his rough, seaman-like
way.
You're
a bounder!" exclaimed the malden.
"Too right I ara!" said Jonathan, pounding himself on the chest. "I'm the best bounder оп this island! Watch me!" #c then
bounded,
"Marvellous!" erled the maiden, "Bat tell
me, sailor must you always land on your face?"
"It saves me shaving," he re- plied, gruffly.
"What a glorious big brute you are!" she cried, her eyes staining. "I feel that I could like you."
"Well," said Jonathan. thought- fully, "if you do I could pouch a nice plate of steak and eggs." Jon- athan had his dull moments.
"I am afraid you don't under- stand me," said the maiden, coyly. "Say that gain and I'll knock you cold," said Jonathan.
She said it again and he bowled her with a snappy right cross.
They were practically as good us married.
Snow is getting old now. He peddles bootlaces and back studs down at the Crown and Anchor. lits wife runs a sly-grog shop in the suburbs. All the children are out of work.
Tan't life hell for the poor!
DO YOU KNOW THESE PEOPLE? | Fun and Games
You've heard
of all these "people, but can you tell what they do? For instance, is a mun- mier a theatrical performer, a man who never says a word, or a child's mother? The first answer is cor- rect. But here are ten other in-
1. Meteorologist
2. Poltroon
3. Sourdough!
dividuals, and three definitions for each. How many can you identify correctly? Each correct answer counts ten points. A score of 00 is fair: 80, good; more than that, exceptional. Answers are on page 19.
Weather prophet. Astral physicist Soldier
. Coward
4. Cryptographer Code expert 5. Bibliomaniac
6. Dragoman. 7. Philatelist 8. Benedict 9. Chirognomist
10. Rustler
Gold prospector Cultured tramp
Archaeologist Book collector Guide Secret agent Beadle Palinist Cattle thief
Book thief Weight lifter Musician Stool plgcon Panhandler Slaughterer
FUNNY SIDE UP
Auto racer Broggart Pretzel baker Mausoleum builder
Bible reader Porter
Stamp collector Newlywed Penman Hanch owner
By Abner Dean
ABNER DIAN
trying something different in a plot
girl; but then moèta gorilla!””
bay meats
Dept.:
1 This, guests and playmates, is the sternest test of sobriety and concentration I know. You rend aloud a given passage from a book, while at the same time you try to wrlie down the alphabet on separate sheet of paper. You must not pause in your reading, nor in your writing. You'll do and say the silliest things....
0
2. "Reven kool" is really an- other way of writing "Never look backwards."'
Do you get the idea? Now unravel: (a) D core u the nx qq is often no vu Ford,
(b) (c) Victory 1 m pppp. (d) t 2222 and 24 t and 4 u and u 4 me. by the 1 It may open (e) A good the nm cell (1) y ̧x nnn? (2)
I want it your brains..
my puzzles II, (Answers
in Column Five.)
in a
.
3. Write on pieces of paper a number of Inconsequential sub- fects -
"Mothers-in-law," "The most beautiful woman in the world," ""Should spats
be abol- etc-fold, place Ished," "Babies, layer draws a
#hat. Each
two minutes, lecture his audience on subject he's picked without thinking or pausing for breath- Splendid training if you're ever thinking of entering parliament.
PI, for
the
Families May Join Britons Abroad
Wives and families of naval and elvilian personnel stationed abroad are to be allowed to proceed overseas, and the grant of Government pha- anges is to bo resumed, the Admiralty announce.
Journeys are made entirely at the travellers' risk, and no guarantee cant be given that a return passage to the United Kingdom will be available Li unexpected circumstances arise.. Government passages may granted to Gibralter, Malta, Alexan- dria, Port Sald, Holta, Simonstown, Colombo, Trincomalee, Singapore, and Bermuda.
ba
In the case of Egypt passengers should be given a certifiente to tho effect that the husband is a Britiah Government - servant: stationed or to be stationed in Egypt. The Egypilan Consul in London will then grant the necessary. vien.
to
The following hands are,' I sug- gest, typical of those upon which so many players come gelef through sheer bnd play, although and more's the pity-they only realise it if it is pointed out to them, and but seldom by their own nnalyals.
I, I, I
♡ Q.10, x ◇ A, K. 3, x
A.J.9
N
B
• K. 1, x
Q. x, x
The contract was "Four Hearts" by South, neither East nor West having bid. The score was N-S. Game; E-W. 0. West opened with the 2 of Clubs.
South considered the situation, and then, having "inken a view" (a euphemism for being wrong!)
West that
was leading from the King, let the 2 run up to his Queen. East, however, took the trick with the
and King
returned
the 10 of Spades. As West held
A, G, J, X, "tricks, South lost three Spndc so, with the Club trick already last, he was
X
was one down. Naturally, he bemoaned his bad luck until North mado the following well-chosen re- rnarks (or something to the same effect): "Bad luck, my fool! Why don't you count up your winners and losers? In this case, Four Hearts' was unbeatable with five Hearts, four Diamonds and the Ace of Clubs at least. Now I suppose we shall lose the rubber." They did.
Apart from the fallure to count up the posibilities of a hand such as this, believe that so many players of South's callure lang to play a hand in the most difficult or risky way possible instead off straightforward manner. I know one very erudite player who has read overything he could lay his hands on and could be really good but for this pecullar tailing which he indulges on every possible occasion, to the grave Amarelas prejudice.di.his partnera-and... himself.
Now for the second hand-
X, X, X
A, 10, 1, I OA, Q, x, x
*x, x
N
В
◆ A, 10, x
VI, I
OI
◆ A, K, Q. 19, I, I, I'
Three No-trumps", by South. and West Jed the 2 of Spades.
South Immediately assumed that with Aine Clubs to the A. K. Q. the sult would break for him. He was wrong because there were four to the Knave in one hand_ogainst him, and he was one down. The 2 was an illuminating lead as it marked West with only four Spades, unless he was false-loading, so South could afford to lose three Spades and one Club. Therefore, on gotting Inf with the Ace of Spades on the third round, he should have led a small Club and conceded one trick in the cult. Ka could ill make tus contract with six Clubs and the three outsido Aces.
It all so simple-afterwards, when pointed out. North again did the point- ing out, but South meroly, remarked that even if North was sight, "one wouldn't expect the Cluba, to lie so badly.” (Shades of safety-play!) Tirre lano hope for a player like that. Un- willing to admit a mistake, he refuser help even when kindly and gently proffered.
ANSWERS
TEASERS
1 Ministry of Information. 2. 0064. 3. Herr Himmler. 4. Burgomaster Max. 4. The Day, 8. Forest, softer, foster. 7. Murmansk. B. M. Erkko. 9. Members of the Women's Royal Naval Bervice. 10. Iz n best English pattern. Its shout can shock one. 15, Sept. 1,
FUN AND GAMES
(a) Be careful, siop before you cross the road; (by an excuse is often në üze; (c). I am for peace after victory: (as tea for two and two for tes and 1 for you and you for me; (e) a good stroke by the Alles may open the enemy' gras: (1) why buy foreign?; (g) I want you to tease your brains over my puzzles, nothing else,
DO YOU KNOW?
1.Weather prophet & Guide 2. Coward
7. Stamp collector :D. Gold, prospector: 8: Newlywed.
4. Code expert 9. Palmist
. Book collector ID. Cattle thief
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