THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 1988.

9137

So Rare-Fox Trot

.Billy Cotton's Orchestra

HITS FROM THE NEW REX "Whiz"

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You're here, You're there-F.T...Billy Cotton's Orchestra

9185 The Valeta

9148 Dixon Hits No. 16 9152 Yours and Mine-F.T.

For You--Quick Step 9156 Sandy's Happy Home

Billy Merrin's Band Billy Merrin's Band

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9146 My Cabin of Dreams--F.T.

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Lily of Laguna-Barn Dance

9141

On the Avenue-Selection

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Dick Robertson's Orchestra

.Reginald Dixon

PRE-WAX-

9157

Sweet Adeline

A Little bit.of Heaven

Joe Peterson

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9161

Gipsy Violin

.Gracie Fields

The Organ, the Monkey and me

Gracie Fields

9153

Moon at. Sea

So Rare

Vera Lyn Vera Lyn

9167

Primo Scala Accordian Band Tel. 27778/9 Six Hits of the Day No. 14.

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A

Chater Road

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Hongkong Hotel Garage

Showroom

The

FEBRUARY

FEBRUARY

FEBRUARY

FEBRUARY

now

FEBRUARY

for my

muffler again and evenings by the fire...

FEBRUARY

S there any reason why any month in the year should make us melan- choly?

Why should February clouds and mists be allowed to lower our spirits? Stubbs Road Is it necessary to be slaves of the

calendar and serfs of the seasons?

Hongkong Telegraph.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 1038.

THIS LOOKS LIKE

PIRACY

Au Insurgent submarine has struck another blow at Britain. Blows, come from all quarters, these days. Some of them in the form of torpedoes, some as bombs or shells, others nothing more than verbal shafts which do little or no damage. But all are aggravations, adding their more or less evil influence to the

state of the world's affairs.

by

FEBRUARY

FEBRUARY

JAMES DOUGLAS

FEBRUARY

fal to enjoy a blazing fire in the open candlestick or candle-smußters or grate until October raises the em- warming pans. bargo on coul and logs.

+

Vebruary is the month for think- ing hard about the poor who have tw money for blunkets, roaring fires and warm garments. Wo ought to give away our old overcoats before the winter seta in.

There are enough warm clothes in our wardrobes to keep all poor wo- men and all poor men as warm as a Loust.

As for the children of the poor, I wish there were a clearing-house for

the warm clothing which is stowed away and never used at all.

What we all need is a good Febru- ary conscience that would stir us Info a clearing out of all the cup- boards that are inhabited by moth- balls.

mothbali mlad is the

THE chemy of the poor. It

hoards comforts which would make thousands comfortable.

The social

of withholding warm clothes which we never wear in far too prevalent, It is the mean. est form of dog-in-the-mangerism.

If you see apoor man shivering In the street, think of the old clothes that you have forgotten, und nake him happy by giving him what you will never miss,

It a good plan when you take a walk to carry an old overcoat on and to give it to the first your arm

down-and-out you meet.

200

some

Or make a bundle of old shirts and vests and socks and astonish the fiest poor man you see by begging. him to accept them.

Women

the most callous boarders of old clothes. Do not wait till you die with a stock of garments These things are now period pieces, that ought to have been WE E feel delleiously guilty as relies of the romantic past, like the poor back years ago.

wheel and the snuff-box, If we could make an inventory of we light our first fire and spinning

all the unworn clothes. in all the houses of the comfortable classes It Nearly everybody I meet is glum commit the awful crime of gloating the ingle and the ingle-mole

over the flames which make our cold

NEBRUARY- is, the

cosy would shock the national conscience. because we asso- feet glow as we and lugubrious,

put them on the elate February days with lengthen- fender and taste the deep comfort of

month, the month of furs Let each owner of surplus raiment and tires, the month of malers and make on inventory every January ing faces. Why Cannot we over the old armchair.

and shower it on the shivering. What overenats, the month, of moth-balls. come the humps and hoodoox of

I know that few of us possess u There ought to be a Muse of the a grand orgy of disgorging it would February?

is a month. fender, and that we must console our Mufler, but I have never come across bef After all, February

The hoarding of old clothes is If we choose we selves with the electric fire, the gas an ode or a sonnet or a lyric to a and not a mood.

be called caused by forgetfulness. I wish can make it as merry us May. We are, and the radiator, those mocking muffler. They used to

substitutes for the leaping Gaines comforters.

February could be made the remem- can rebel against the lying conven-

bering month for giving away every- tion which turns the falety of which waste their riot of heat on the

cold flue of the extravagant chinney. I know that they are unhyglenie, thing that we can de without. February into gloom.

but I dote on them, for they go out too scan and come in too late. #_Q}

We can give February [nume Instead of a bad name.

The truth is that no month destrves, to be given up as a bad job, and the human heart can rejoice as genially and as jovially in February as in June or July

I da hot say that February is the best month of the year, but it is ger tuinly not the worst, and we might make it better if we made the best

of it.

HE poets have not done as much as they might have done for this grassly misrepresented month, but unfortunately they can and no cheerful rhymes for its bad- ly-chosen name.

The only word that seems to match syllable is bury, and bury has a sad

sound.

We ought to emulate the hilarity of that fine old parson the Rev. Thomas' Constable, who shouted at the top of his mellow old voice:-

Hall, old October. bright and

chill, First freedman from the summer

sun!

But even central heating is a bless, ed luxury that warms the cockles of the fey heart.

There is a sense of sweet sin as we

turn it on before it is due and revel in the thought that we could do with

out it.

If I had my way I would, wear a THE "VERY IDEA” comforter all the year round. There

is nothing so companionable as an old mufler which has done good ser-

vice in all weathers and all climates.

Mine goes to the cleaner

once

"We get an illicit kiek out of being wastefully warm in October, for we, a year and renews its life every know that it does not cost us more autumn. It is a portion and parcel to be warm than to be sold. That of my cosy past, with gales and snow

"THEY'VE GOT ME,

is the fan of living in a flat, for the and sleet in every crense. PAL", SAID

warmth is there whether we turn it off or turn it on.

PUT the pure joy of waste is captured when we burn our own coal in a centrally heated We may not need the re in

It reminds me that man is not a tree which loggs its leaves and goes nulted all winter. Why should we be disheartened by the spectacle of falling leaves?

I ngo

WAS

VERITAS

CUPID'S ARROW UNERRINGLY FOUND ITS MARK

By Eddie "Bluebeard" Kelly

think

theme

gat. the open grate, but it cheers us to MANY years

donnted a fur coat, and "I really do not understand why it We are sorry for the flat-dwellers should be regarded as a dangerous

waste as well as feet it. who do not possess even one grate garment." for burning coal. Their eyes are But I tremble when I get into it,- desolate. They are pleasure furnished by the ancient I run the risk of outching cold. As last Saturday of our old robbed of the fur i know that, if I get out of it TN view of the wedding This latest affront was des

"Veritas," We coal-scuttle and the tongs and the if cold-catching could be avoided by pal finitely n' foul blow, The

poker and the heartbrug.

any system of clothing! 1 like the brazen furniture of the The less we think of colds the Love should be our steamer Endymion carried no

old-fashioned hearth. I love the safer we are. There is no season fall off the brass dusts, for the dogs as well cling of the brass re-irons as they for colds, for there are summer colus to-day. more dangerous cargo than coal.

autumn colds, winter How romantic it themes. colds, and spring colds.

We have made a very close She had on board an observer

are brothers of the logs.

Alas! the dogs and their logs are It is a deluston to regard autumn of-the-Non-Intervention-Com-

dying out. There are children to us the season of snitts and bronchial study of marriage and we find It is the healthiest that-all-that-is--necessary—to. we were sentenced to per- day who have never seen a fire-log frightfulness. mittee's organisation which con-

make a wife happy is taet on the petual summer we should or a fire-dog or even a candle or a time of the year.

part of the husband. trols the traffic into Spain and be miserable, and we could not help sees to it that no munitions fell of sunshine.

Splee high the bowl and drink

your All!

Thank heaven, at last the sum

mer's done,

I

longing for deliverance from a sur-

The sun-saturated and sun-sated exite longs for the loveliness of October. "Oh, to be in England now October's there!" the weary Empire builder cries as he sees a vision of our October woods in all their glory, with

a pageantry of golden hues that surpase

pase the splendours of spring. I can never forgive Tom Hood for maligning the magnificence November:-

No warmth, no cheerfulness,

healthful ease-

ان

no

No comfortable feet in any mem-

ber

reach that country in ships which carry the flags of nations conforming to the non-interven- tion regulations. Such ships fly not only the fing of their registry but also the Inter- national flag which denotes that they carry a neutral observer who guarantees that the cargo is not the sort coming under embargo. The guarantee is backed by the International Control Committee. The only excuse of an attacker is the suspicion that the ship might shuddering are over. It is not law- have been Bying the Inter-

U

TIGER FÖR

BEER

SOLE DISTRIBUTORS:

No shaile, no shire, no butterflies,

по беск,

No fruits, no flowers, no leaves, no

birds, No-vember.

I am Impenitent Octobrist and Novembrist, for these wickedly libel- led months are crammed with beauty

and packed with delight.

the year, for they restore to us the comforts of the hearth and the fire- alde.

The sorrows of shivering und

They are the warmest months of

national flag and the Red En- Fierce fighters ан they un- sign as a means of breaking the doubtedly are, cruel as they may

A. S. WATSON & CO., LTD. Insurgent blockade of Govern have been in this civil

JULIANNANGUTANGALEITA ZETU SAINT PRESENZANADIAN ment ports, and that she

COPIES OF

PHOTOGRAPHS

by "Staff Photographer"

appearing in the

"SOUTH CHINA MORNING POST"

and

"THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH" may be purchased

at the Business Office of "The Hongkong Telegraph" Morning Post Building, Wyndham Street.

Was

war,

their whole history shows them to be chivalrous by instinct. not entitled to show these

Perhaps there is some good emblems of innocence. But the

explanation for the tragedy of onus of proof in a case of that the Endymion, and the eleven Hort is surely with the attacker, who perished with her, includ- In this case the submarine con- ing the wife of her master. It cerned fired the torpedo which is certain

that the British

sent the Endymion to the hot-Government will not act in tom in four minutes without|reprisal or in any fashion until even trying to ascertain the the authorities concerned have Innture of the ship's freight, had time to make their explana-

That sort of warfare la ustion-or excuses,

cowardly as it is criminal, even¦ The only immediate effect of when the victimised ship is the the sinking of the Endymion, it property of one of the bol-appears, will be the recurrence ligerents. When it is a neutral of that now familiar condition: craft the offence is nothing)"Incrowned tension in the Medi-: short of piracy.

terranean." It would be a wise Such an action does not «comman who could predict the to fit the Spanlah character. breaking point,

Sharpen your wits

Each of the following statements contains something absurd, and after each there are four attempts at saying what is foolish in it. ficad these attempts and underline the one which you consider best.

Your In the answer you will find the number of the best attempt. decision must be made within the time allowed for each grade. EAXMPLE;

"Every cloud has a sliver lining"

This is foolish because: (a) The cloud may have no lining; (b) Silver la a metal; (c) The lining may be pink; (d) It may have

a silver edge but no lining.

The best answer to underline is the first.

1

"Every dog has his day."

This is foolish because: (a) Every other being has his day; (b) Every dog has many days and all are his; (c) The dog does not understand what his day is; (d) His day means his opportunity, and he may not have one.

2

In

a cement-floored corridor, on either side of which are sound-film studios, is written In large letters the word, "Silence!" Foollsh because:-

(a) The doors leading to the studios could be sound-proof; (b). The im actors have to speak; (e) Foolsteps on a concrete floor are bound to make a noise, (d) In case of fire it would be necessary to give un alarm.

Time allowed for tests (1) and (2): two minutes.

"I am not boasting," said a young man, "for I never tell any one how clever I am."

Foolish becnuse: (a) He is boastful. (b) He thinks he is clever and is not: (c) He can be clever without being boast- ful. (4) It is bad taste to speak about one's cleverness.

4

In a lecture on public speaking the lecturer said: "The best way of driving your unanswerable arguments home in to bombard your audience with a quick-fire of short pithy sentences, composed of very short but telling words"

Foolish because: (a) The argument may require detailed ex- (c) planation. (b) This lecturer did not follow his own advice. Long sentences are as good as short ones. (d) Short words are not impressive.

Time allowed for test (3) and (4); two minutes.

marked

the beginning

5

French Revolution The democracy,

of

Foolish because: (a) It marked the beginning of a reign of terror, (b) A few years later Napoleon became Emperor. (c) Other democracies existed before. (d) Killing aristocrats is -not demoerney.

Time allowed for test (5); two minutes.

6. State the reason why the following statements are

absurd.

(1) I

man begins by thinking he is as good

as he is wise, he will end by thinking that he is as wise as he is good.

(2) A gentleman is a man who never does the wrong thing unintentionally.

(3) National effetency is like an epidemic. It grows os it extends.

(4) One man with unconquerable determination at his sido consitutes a majority.

Time allowed for test (6): four minutes. Answers in Column Seven.

Husbands are the enuse of all The the strife in the house. trouble is that they will answer

back.

Then there are sulky worms who won't answer back. Worse still are the ones who moon about the house, getting in the way and picking things up and putting them down again.

And if you ask them why they don't go out for n walk some- where, what do the selfish brutes do but go out and leave you all by yourself.

Before we got married we were a sentimental sort of a cove. We used to carry around a pink, heart- shaped conversation lollio with "Meet Me To-Night" on it. We had that lolle for years and years.

HALITOSIS7

It was a breath of romance to us, Of course, we had to get rid of it when we got married, in order to save any unpleasantness, (we didn't get married to save any unpleasant- ness; don't misunderstand us). We remember, the tears coursed down our check as we sat there, eating

It.

At the same time, we burnt all our photographs, and letters, and garters, and locks of hair and other souvenirs, and passers-by, seeing the huge cloud of smoke coming from the chimney, said: "Ah, Kelly's getting married. I wonder who the lucky, fortunate girl is?"

Don't take us too seriously, girls, We're free on Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays.

And though we don't go much on the other sex as a rule, we're will .ing to consider your propositions. Or, better still, your impropositions, Alsio be seeing you!

Solution

Here are the answers to the Intelligence tests in Column Five and Six.

(1) d: (2) et (3) a; (4) at (5) c:

(0) 1. He does think s0 from the beginning, both being the same. 2. It means that a gentleman sometimes does the wrong thing intentionally. 3. To grow is the same na to extend. 4. One mam cannot be majority.

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