THE HONGKONG. TELEGRAPH, FRIDAY, JANUARY 28, 1938...
KIL OLOF
(ENGLISH LAVENDER WATER
REMEMBRANCE
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YE OLDE ENGLISH
LAVENDER
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Would you like to be 21 again?-
I wouldn't
"I
'F you could have the chance, would you like to be young again?" The question was asked of a group of middle-aged men and women in a university gathering.
With fervour and sincerity we all replied: "Not for anything you could give us."
For no bribe would we again have endured
because there's a
lot of nonsense talked about being young.
the fumbling experiments, the emotional miseries, Life gets better as you
the self-conscious humiliations of youth. We knew well enough when we were well off.
Nor have I ever heard that question answer- ed otherwise by any one of intelligence to whom it was put directly and personally.
Yet in those curious public pronouncements which often seem to be made automatically and Phone 27778-9 without thought, people go on declaring that, the world is for the young, is in the hands of the young, must look to the young for solution of all its
difficulties. The
young, heaven help them, be- lieve it, and it
Hongkong Eelegraph. depresses them,
FRIDAY, JANUARY 28, 1938.
ONE REASON FOR
OPTIMISM
as well it may,
THE days of
a man are three-score years and ten, and the days of
a
woman, accord- Ing to the vital
get older
•
by DOROTHY L. SAYERS
BUT there! the relation
of theory to practice
is always so disconcerting.
In the days when parents said, "Children should be seen and hot heard" they had a great many children, who looked eagerly forward to being grown-up and enjoying themselves.
Now that parents say, "Youth must be served," they have vory few children,
many of whom complain that they don't want to grow up and can see nothing en- joyable to look forward to.
Let us for Heaven's sake stop talking insincere and poisonous nonsense. What youth has to look forward to is the pleasure
IT is odd that the cult of being adult, which is a very
of youth should be so great pleasure indeed. energetically preached from
educational pulpits. The object
of education is (one would sup-
"IR"
," said Dr. Johnson,
"clear your mind of
pose) to assist the mind to at- cant." To make a pet or a tain maturity. Yet the modern fetish of youth is to exploit it educationalist is the first to cry for our own selfish amusement.
To refuse employment to ma- stinking fish over the goods that he supplies.
ture workers is not homage to The brute fact is that the youth, but a plain matter of buy- brain decays much later than ing in the cheapest market. the body, and in some people The howl in public-over our seems never to decay at all. This own lost youth is an open con- is the best argument for the so- fession that we did no good with called "higher education" of it, and never should, not though women: and the one argument it were restored to us
twenty that is never, or seldom, advan- times over.
Excellent indeed was the ex- ced.
famous detective writer, herself aged forty- three. Broadcasting recently she said: "It is not true that a woman is finished at thirty. If it were it would be a dreary thing to look forward to."
If any one asserts that a hortation to become as little statistics, able; for here, skill is sold to the woman is "too old at thirty," we children-as nice, old-fashioned Statistics are usually dull rather more, since the female public directly and on its merits. should immediately demand, children, whose wholesome ambi- things except for the statis-organism is tougher.
What doctor, scholar, or writer "Too old for what? Certainly tion it was to grow up into men tician and those whom the
The days of our youth being, expects or is expected to attain not too old to enjoy making the and women. figures directly concern. The at a generous estimate, thirty great importance under the age best of her wits.
of thirty?
The slogan "too old at thirty" | general public of Hongkong, for years, we must all (it seems)
forward to rather
The golden age for all who live belongs to a brief, bad period of "THE VERY IDEA" instance, has very little interest than half a life-time of futility.
more by their brains is the period from social history when women were
look
No wonder that, confronted by forty to sixty. They have learnt expected to do no thinking, but THEY CALL this exhilarating prospect, mo- create freely in their chosen of that). Yet books and news-
their technique and are ready to only feeling (and not too much dern young people are sometimes credium, with wider opers are today and IT MUSIC accused of appearing sleek and ledge they have gained wider in verbinge discouraged,
terests,
purporting to tell women "how to keep young." It would be more sensible to tell them how to grow up.
-BAH!
"CORNET", IS KELLY'S CRY TO WAR-MONGERS
in trade returns, and the num- bers of bags of this and that coming into and going out of this Colony. A housewife may be interested in the price of
They know they are having a Incidentally, they have become flour, but she has little or no pretty thin time now, and they more entertaining and easier to concern whatever with the num- are confidently assured that this get on with, because they no
YOUTH is important, ber of bags delivered at Hong- is the time of their lives. Why longer take themselves with
not for what it is, but By Eddie "Hoo-Haw" Kelly kong godowns. Just the same, cunnot we middleaged such agitated seriousness. The
hypocrites tell them frankly, delight of middle-age is for what it may become, and the the number of those bags may "We are happier at forty than paradox: that as one becomes cult of youth has its ugly side. HONGKONG is taking dirbctly concern her husband's we were at twenty, and so will more important to others one
The fashion for immaturity
this war too seriously. -earnings-The-prosperity-of-a-you-be?
-becomes-less-important-to-one- reflected_in_the_educational pro-We rofer, of course, to the-
self.
grammes of to-day tends to controversy between scaport such as this varies I can think of four reasons,
To drop a social brick at seven- make both boys and girls grow "Eeyore" and the music directly according to the bulk all dishonest; idiot sentimen- teen is a tragedy; to drop it at up later and later. And this lovers of the Colony.
as forty-seven is a comedy. of freight which the docks tality; the desire to pose
martyrs; the readiness to shift
cence encourages some extreme- Both of them have written to handle for the godowns, and the our responsibilities; the con-
ONLY in middle-age is ly unpleasant inhibitions, not to the papers, protesting against godowns store for markets here sciousness of failure in our-
it gloriously revealed say vices, that astonish nobody "Eeyore's" Insidious attempts to selves, and the desire to present to one that what one says and more than the parents and undermine the edifles so care- and elsewhere within reach of this failure as a malady incident does makes little difference in teachers who have done their in- fully built up, note by note, by the Colony's traders,
rather to our age than to our in- the long run to anybody, and nocent best to bring them about, Paderewski, Glazounov, Busoni, firmity.
that therefore one may as well But time brings in its re- etc.
It is good news for the house- wife, and her bread-winner, then, that Hongkong should have experienced a record year in the matter of trade. Granted that a large proportion of the thousand million dollar total of
·
artificial prolonging of adoles-
say and do what one likes. venges: one of these inhibitions We could mention a whole THERE is a fifth and
If the party is dull, one can go is the refusal to face responsi-Liszt of composers who are more practical reason, home; if one prefers sweet wine bility; the refusal to face respon- turning in their graves as the employing cheap labour looks much namely, that the preference for to dry, one may proclaim as sibility is a contributory cause red tentacles of bolshevism creep and sounds nicer when it is call- finds the works of Mr. X-both declining birth-rate will (we the fortissimos of the classics.
without shame; if one of the fall in the birth-rate, the up the piano stools and storm ed "giving youth its chance." dirty and dull, one need not are told) shortly give us a nation entirely composed of Inexperience is not in itself trouble to read them. If one almost imports was made up of trea-preferable to acquired akill and dislikes physical exertion, child- elderly, and middle-aged peopic.
experience: if it were, it would ren, dogs, green vegetables, When we reach this point wo sure; but whether the com-
come dearer, not cheaper.
country surroundings, the re- shall really have to ask ourselves modity is sugar or silver, it
ligion of universal brotherhood, what has become of the theory means work for
In art and letters and the or Hongkong
theatrical productions in that the world is for the young learned professions, nobody pre- which the actors Inbourers and something to add tends that experience is not valu- down long flights of steps in a and amiable theory has landed fall up and and how on earth that attractivo
to the gross income column of
bad light, what does it matter? us in such a situation. the ledger.
TELEPATHY: AS EXPERIENCED
BY AN ORDINARY MAN
A:
Wo onco had a friend who thought that a classio was a room full of schoolboys who had eaten too many green apples.
in F. Major make us sick,
Us, we are like that. Arpeggios
Give us Art Carnerio and his boys playing "The Virgin Sturgeon Needs No Urgin'", and we sit in rapt attention for hours,
But B. Flats leave us cold. We had to get an electric radiator in our last one.
SONATA BY HAIG We don't care for Paderewski, but lead us to a straight Haig and Hag, with maybe a dash of soda, and we'll have another with you any day.
Rubinoff gives us a pain in our
Helena May concert.
A man with long hair mat down
at the piano. For a while he caress- ed his cars.
Thon
J
TINKLE-INKLE INKLEI
Ha stopped to pick some vermiri off the keyn.
RUMBLE-RUMBLE BRAMI
they are not recorded anywhere. These statistics are impressive And still the movement of some in a certain light. In 1935 mer-hundreds of millions of bullion chandise imported into Hong- has not been added, approxi- kong (not including the quanti- mately $386,000,000 coming in ty of goods for re-export) and $395,000,000 going out in totaled $364,989,915—n con- the past year.
WHILE home on a visit from was "something in It"; that I was Cadenza.
South Africa, where I had "sender" while she was the "receiver," | We were once envelgled into a siderable sum, but not reckoned Rending over these resounding built up a profitable little agency Power of Emotion anything to celebrate.
The figures even a pessimist must business, I became engaged to a following year imports of the be impressed. The trouble is, school teacher who was con- the theory that strong emotion, pro-
very intellectual type of girl-
In one letter my fiancee advanced Same sort totalled $452,350,193. as so many will complain, very vinced that telepathy was.
duced by some happening of great But Inst year, 1937, they had few of these millions of dollars seentifle and demonstrable fact. Import; some condition of extreme jumped to $617,063,967... or find their way into the pockets
Joy. "such us winning the first prize Her accounts of one or two in the Calcutta Sweep," was perhaps roughly $600 worth of produce of the average worker. But, as experiments in thought transmission essential to the success of such ex- for every single soul of the pre- a matter of fact, they do; nl-my interest in the subject, and we
were sumciently startling to arouse periments. sent population which is said to though just how many and justAfrica we should systematically en- the date was burned into ray brain
agreed that when I got back to South One memorable Sunday evening-INKLEY have increased by 250,000 in how, it would be impossible to deavour to communicate with each later-I was sitting alone in my room the past six months. Per capita, say. It stands to reason, how-
Intent on my customary ritund, when a mood of depression began to creep this must be one of the world's over, that the greater the mass should both spent half an hour in
The arrangement was that we over me, increasing in interity to a solitude at set hour each Sunday depth of desolation and a feeling that import total the only one that spending must be; and
had occurred. This foreboding of one difference in longitude, so that our calamity became so painful that in- counts when one considers the man's profit, and the profit of of time; that we should keep a re-aloud, for my pal from the next efforts should synchronise in point voluntarily I must have cried out handling of freight. There are the whole, is shared in some cord of what we tried to transmit, room poked his head around the door the exports, valued at $407,322,-; degree by every citizen. We give delalis of it in the weekly and asked, "Did you call?"
As he spoke, the wave of horrified cannot be estimated because a prosperous 1938.
(Continued on Page 7.)
other by this means.
Even the piano quivered, TINKLE-İNKLEINKLE-INKLEI
· RUMBLE-RUMBLEI
TINKLE-
com-
MINUETS SEEM LIKE HOURS "Say, what's thin-” we
"Shhhh" they said. "He's play- Bathtub!"
most active ports. Nor is this income, the greater the mABB evening, allowing for the two hours/mething poignani and devastating|ing Plumoffskiwinski's Minust fn-A.'
letters that passed between us,
"Tepnuta!" we mald coarsely, and departed, leaving Hongkong's musia lovers to enjoy the rent of the programme, by himself, Music may come in bara. But we profér"our bass' from a
Nocturnes to you!
FRIDAY NIGHT IS. AMAMI NIGHT 7.721; and the re-exporta, which have reason to look forward 10-we-kept up the practice religiously, misery completely overwhelmed me. bottle.--
and it certainly appeared that there