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Stubbs Road

Hongkong Telegraph.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 29, 1936.

FIRST THINGS FIRST

Mr. Anthony Eden, in his review of British foreign polley, couli not woll overlook the question of the future of mandated territories, for doubt- less this issue will be touched

response

P

Before you get married-

ROVERBIALLY marriage is a lottery: and if you marry in the proverbial manner--- without a thought, but with only an emotion--it certain- ly is:

Marriage is also an art, and as auch сип only be learned in marriage. How then without marriage-can you judge the potentialities (In that art) of the one you love?

Paychologists say that the only true preparation for that art is completo emotional maturity; and that you Aro to be considered emotionally mature If:-

1. you are liked by both sexes, 2. you are reasonably happy in your job (a woman should learn a job even if she intends to marry, they say),

3. you are emotionally inde- pendent of your relatives-- especially neurotic rela- tiver-and 'can make im- portant decisions without them,

4. you have a desire to abare the responsibilities as well as the joys of married com- panionship and to make the continuous adjustments that it requires.

You cannot measure emotional maturity in a paper test; but you can once your attention in called to it-observe the first three points in everyday contnels,

especially when you are visiting

ench other's homes.

detailed-is drawn ap to throw, This questionnaire--frank and light on the fourth point; to dicit your emotional maturity in rela tion to what you want from mar- riage and what you are prepared to give.

A Answer first those questions

upon when Germany sees fit to re-

on which you have clear-cnt bly to the British questionnaire, a opinions, then the others. Its to which is now long value to you naturally depends on overdue. The British Foreign the honesty you bring to it. If # your love justifies marriage, Secretary frankly confesses that will not bulk at the frank reality any ilua of transferring mau-of these significant details, dates from their present holders B. separately,

Answer the questionnaire then compare to other Powers would raise grave;

your answers. Your readiness to difficulties, but he does throw outdo that is in itself a test and

a hint that something might be indication of emotional maturity. done in regard to the question of

freer access to raw

materials C.

produced in mandated territories and colonies. The British view 1.

It will set you thinking and

talking.

What would you appreciate

most in your ideal mate?

is that this latter question might Label your choices 1, 2 and 3.

well be discussed at an inter- national conference under Lengue of Nations auspices. In taking this stand, Britain shows a clear realisation of the basic aspect of the problem. There has been no demand by the populations of the mandated territories for any change of control, and, what is

Absolute loyalty and fidelity: Devotion;

+

Reliability and trustworthi

ncss;

Even temper Personality;

Ask

your fiancé (or-ée) these 20 Questions

Ability to earn money: Ambition;

Affection;

Physical attraction;

A happy-go-lucky nature; Brains and common-sense; Love of children; Love of home.

Tick off those that you believe you possess in average or, mo- derate amount.

Underline those that you believe you possess in less than average amount.

2. What do you want most-from marriage First and second

choice.

Security; Children;

A helpmate in your career; Affection; Comfort;

Physical companionship.

If you could have these outside marriage, would you marry?

3.

4.

IJ you consider marriage.

should be

... 50-50 partnership? b...n 60-40 partnership in which the man dumin- ates?

<... 10-60 partnership, in which the woman has the deciding word? Which would you prefer?

For men. Of these three

types of women :- 1...the vivacious,

fluffy. elinging type who likes to lean on you;

2...the type who prefers to

mother you;

the woman who prefers-

You are

"emotionally mature"

if-

pou appreciate mort in the id vai mate (Své Questing Queri affection, physical attraction, even temper, love of home and children.

-if you want most from marriage: affection, physical companionship, a helpmate in your career (if you are a man); children and security if you are a teamán), (Sce Question Too.)

-if you prefer a 50/50 partnership, Three.)

(Ser

Question

if you prefer the co-operative type of partner; the man who is neither dominating and paternal nor submissive and hen-peeked; the woman who ja neither a "elinger” nor an overmotherly "elucking hen” (Ser Questions Four and Five.)

if you rate the following points high when choosing a life-partner (see Question Six); afection, physical attraction, similar interests and tastes, similar «views' about life, etc.. desire for children, sufficicui means to ensure security.

if you are on excellent terms with relatives, prefer to have their approval, but are able to make decisions without them and even against their wishes,

If you would prefer fewer visits from “in-laws" after marriage, but would judge them on their merits.

-if you believe that almost any two people can make a success of marriage if they are determined 19.

-if you believe in making clear before marriage: (d) whether the wife should retain outside interests or not, (b) how the family income should be controlled and bulgeted, ie) about children.

if you believe that instinet should be guided by know- ledge in the matter of the physical and emotional facts of marriage (See Question Eighteen.)

nor over 7. Do you consider that children 14. In budgeting for

to go 50-50 and is neither dependent

motherly.

...which do you find more

f.

b

...which is the more attrac-

tive physically?

Sense of humour: Ability to cook and run home;

equally to the point, the mandates NOTES OF THE DAY

on

sympathetic?

e...which would you chouse

As a mate if you had not already chosen?

d... in which category would you place me? (fiancee). For women.

a...in which category would

you place yourself?

8.

wants

to 9.

h

Of these three types of men:-- 1...the man who

dominate women; ...the charmingly submis. sive man who wants woman to boas him; 3...the man who is quite to go manly, but likes 50-50 in cooperating with a woman? a...which doe you find more

sympathetic?

fire not exercised solely in the interests uf the mandatory

A centre of spiritual healing Powers. At the same time,

has been opened at Milton Abbey, there may be scope for making which is situated in one of the raw materials produced in most beautiful parts of Dorset- the

The Abbey was dedicated these territories more generally shire.

June 15 by the Bishop of accessible, and Britain is quite Sherborne in the presence of more 5. For women. prepared that this aspect of the than a thousand men and women. question, and also its relevance including seventy clergymen, who to certain of her Colonies, should had come from distant parts of the country to join in a thanks- come under sympathetic con- giving festival to celebrate the sideration. When the issue is launching of this new enterprise. closely examined it will be seen The Ministry is to be conducted by the lev. John Maillard, who that the claims of those who are for the past seventeen years has raising this question could be brought physical and spiritual met if some satisfactory arrange-relief to many sufferers. Milton Abbey comprises an estate of nine ment on these lines were reached. hundred acres. Thirty, patients There is not, and never has been, are already under treatment, and any question of excluding from after a certain amount of renova- these mandated territories set-tion and reconstruction it is hoped tlers from, any country, and it to be able to accommodate about would thus seem that if the purely two hundred. The centre is open to anyone suffering from mental economic problem could be ad-disorders or bodily aliments and justed, no necessity for further diseases. Plans are in hand for concessions

would arise. It is the development of various occu-

has

b...which attracts you more

physically?

c...which would you choose

as a mate, had you not already chosen?

should be welcomed:

...soon after marriage? b...after two or three years of

married #fer

e...when-and only if-par-

cuts can afford it?

One choice.

Do you consider it justifiable

to have no children:

"...if there in hereditary

ter?

2 home which do you consider bet-

1...giving the wife a fixed allowance and complete control over it?

2...The husband to scrutinise bills and petty cash accounts and hand over the money as they are checked?

Would you consider it:

disease in either family? 15., wise for a husband to in-

it

b...If poverty makes

difficult to rear them? e...if either parent does not

wish it?

Should children:

...be compelled to undergo religious instruction?

b...be urged to?

c...be allowed to if they want

to?

...have nene or be dissuaded

from it?

16.

xure

himself when he marries, if not already in- Bured?

b... reasonable for the wife to contribute a small amount from her allowance to- wards this provision?

Do you believe that two

people about to marry should get from their doctors & clean bili so far as health and suit- con- ability for parenthood are

10. On what terms are you with: cerned.

*a...your mother?

b...your father?

c...your brothers and sisters?

17.

Do you believe that engaged couples should live in each

In each case, are you strongly other's homes for a time to test attached? On excellent terms? out whether they are emotionally compatible for more than twenty- Indifferent? Unfriendly?

four hours at a stretch?

towards: d...in which category would 11. How do you genuinely feel

you place me? (fance).

...your mother-in-law-to-be?. For men.

b..your father-in-law-to-be? e...in which category would

you place yourself?

Rate the following ̈ ̧points according to their Import- in · your opinion when

e...your brothers and sisters-

in-law-to-be?

In each easeStrong like? Like very well? Indifferent or dislike?·

Do you consider that re-

Do you believe that:

18... the physical facts of mur- riage are important, and the requisite knowledge should be completed from books or doctors or a com- potent adviser?

b...such things should be left to one's own instinct?

choosing a Bfe-partner. Label 12. latives (including mothers. 19. Do you believe that divorce

1. similar interests, tastes, in-law) should be seen:

hobbies, otc;

2. desire for children;

3. sufficient means or prospects

.. apparent, however, that even pations, in, which vital and cou- from this standpoint Britainstructive work may be undertaken. could not be expected to be the and patients will be encouraged to only nation to make concessions, lead normal lives. One section 6. and that is precisely the reason of the Abbey is fitted with modernance

electrical appliances, and a staff why the idea of an international of trained nurses is to be employ your choices from 1 to 6. conference on the subject

ed, under the supervision of a been put forward. The first resident medical officer. A special necessity, so far as the general convalescent home is to be built, situation is concerned, is that and a cinema will be erected where major European problems should films can be shown for the enter

instruction be disposed of before these ex-tainment lerior issues are raised. Thus patients. No public appeal for Mr. Eden pleads that with so funds has been made. but a sum of £20.000 has already been re- many other international ques- tions outstanding, there should beceived from private supporters. no disposition to introduce at this stage matters which might cause ill-advised to press for the solu- further differences between the tion of problems which might in- nations. Once there is a generul volve the nations concerned in settlement in Europe, other and interminable argument and thus

und

of

LANE, CRAWFORD, LTD. less urgent issues can be dcult create an atmosphere in no wise

with in due course. Until then, helpful to the consideration of Fit would be most impolitic and larger-and-more-pressing--issues.-

to ensure security,

..the man is a few years

older;

5. same religion;

6. same race or nationality;

7. the man is taller;

8. similar views

and politics:

about life

9. the full approval of parents

has been gained;

10. physical attraction; -

11. affection;

12. pity of one for the other;

13, mutual comfort and

venience...

con:

13.

n...often?

b...occasionally?

c...rurely 7

d-some often, some rarely?

Do you consider that women after marriage:

...should retain their job and

complete financial indepen- dence if they so wish? b...should retain a part-time job if they so wish? . c...should cultivate unpaid.

outside interests' if they wish ?

d...should' devoto their entire time to the home and

children?

20.

8.never justified? b...justißed if the marriage makes neither happy? c...justified only in the last

resort?

Do you believe: ...that almost any two sensi- ble persons can make a success of their marriage if they are determined to? b...that unless they are suited to ench other, their chances are poor?

..that they must be "apiri- tual affinities"; the only two for each other in the world?

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