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*Phone 27778-9.
HONG KONG HOTEL GARAGE Stubbs Road.
Hongkong Telegraph.
FRIDAY, JUNE 16, 1934,
OUR FREE PORT
STATUS
Wavering opinions on the question of retention of the | Colony's free port status were expreshed by Mr. S. II. Dodwell
FRIDAY, JUNE 15, 1934.
NOTES OF THE DAY WHAT ARE YOUR PET
THE KURAMOTO AFFAIR
R
MEANNESSES?
By "C. J. CUTCLIFFE-HYNE
The termination of the Kuramoto affair must have brought a sigh of rellef to Nanking, while a too close enquiry into the feelings of the Japanese direct-action brigade EGULARLY once a week somie-many miles does my lady's Rolls would perhaps bo undesirable.
one says to me, "Lend me log off per is. 6d. Add wear and Fortunately, there were cool heads your penell half a minute," and 1) tear of iyres and other things, in Japanese counnels and perhaps reply, "Sorry, can't. It's on
A chauffeur's wages, and so on, and a shrewd suspicion among those chain made fust to my watch you arrive at a pretty heavy ofer well
nequainted with Mr. Kura-guard." So I am one up on the moto that the denouement might thrifty man for more usually appear exde was pursued long pencila are not valuable, but. I grasp that? Not for one moment. waiting enough to prevent officials from looking foolish. It was just as woll for peaceful relations, never- theless, that Mr. Kuramoto's desire to commit suicide was not trans Inted into action. There seems to
as it did—and “
woman) who collects poncils. My
hate parting with them, Sticking to my own private pencils is one of my chorisited meannesses.
that saving of 108, on the distant hend charge to be entered against
exs. But woulds the dear soul
The utmost she would ever rise to would be a "Well, I had toʻtaką the car for a run, anyway," which was skating on the edge of-well, prevarication.
I don't steal pencils, as (for ex- ample) I automatically annex boxes of matches unless the nig
I have the habit." me.
It la a curious thing. "the sales.
The Very Idea!.
LOVE IS BLIND
By Eddie Kelly, Paralytic.
He met her at the talkies; They went for littlo walkies, Got married. Now the storkits Keep them home to mind the egnawkies.
Being the reminiscences of Mr. Edward Kelly, Impecunious Journalat, man-about-town, poet, libeller, misogynist, and etcetera,
⚫ must be all these that have marriages taken place in Hongkong
recently. Certain manufacturing
'be a lesson in the affair if one gardly owner stope other man'a frms live on It. I suppose it is
could only find it.
*
BIG CAPITAL SHIPS
same distaste for pencil an I should have for using a branch of the meanness habit.
Since we wrote for you
his tooth-brush. That la narrow but I am afraid only know about last week, we have fallen in minded, possibly. But I am not, it at second-hand. It seems al- moralising; I am merely recording most exclusively a woman's fad. love.
items in the cult of meanness,
1 NEVER BUY MATCHES
My own (slightly) superior sex la pharistically free from it.
We
for fell so hard The most popular shooting, man Miranda that we're bruised I have not, for instance, the in Great Britain, who died the all over. But, you should smallest séruple in using a match other day, was better known for
I have not paid for. In fact, buy-one little pet meanness than for see her bruises.
ing matches is one of the things all his manifold acts of hospitality
I don't do. Aly household pur- and kindness.
chuses matches--or ought to-and He was one of the few hosts I
R
agan here again."
She has eyes that twinkle
(Go on,
Parliament's manifest interest in Italy's decision to lay down the keels of two 15,000-ton battleships Is not far to seek. Although every recent development seems to sag- gest that the 1935 navul conference will be empty of results, the Ad miralty has not abandoned hope, Italy's new 35,000-tounera muy complicate matters seriously, for it is clearly the intention of the is incredibly mean with them know who told his guests, "I don't like dianionds. British Government to revive its
Where the store is hidden is ask you to pay my keepers, and Eridic, tell me more about arguments for Bmitations In size
black secret Rept by the distaff ghillies, and loaders, and benters. diamonds!) Her lips into- as well as of numbers, and to urge
Aide. I am not supposed to penet-I give them Adequate wages my maximum tonnage of 26,000 rate into their fastnesses, but oc self. If you interfere with thisxicate us (Love and XXX). with guns not exceeding 12 inches, Two now ships in Italy would givesionally I sneak in, find a match mancial arrangement and push Her teeth are like pearls (No, a fresh lease of life to the 35.000-rd, draw from it as and when tips on them, they'll get the sack, not Pearl's-Mabel's) Her tonners and spoil the argument in with this for a week, but that is
required. With luck I get away and you won't be asked to let off Grecian nose (Nose- favor of smaller craft which rare. They generally drop on the would rest largely upon cheapness leakage inside three days, and the in replacement of existing battle-hidey-hole is changed, and the ships when they reach the age
hunt on again, Bmit. It is a hard world for those,
nere grouse moor with caper and and scize us some time, Deant) When I am at home during the who are content to kill with the winter I can smoke a chain of
roe ground adjoining in Suther Her- landshire. He hated going to minimum of expenditure.
pipes all day and never use a other people's shouts, and his joy match. Long envelopes make ex- in life was to have constant partles gullent spill, and the trifle that on his own territory. And very I must be a distinct asset to the proud he did 'em, and so say all of British tolller fails to worry, me.
us who went. But- What does a ton of coal patter Well, he had just the one fail- if I can economise on a box of in, that I have already hinted at. matches?
He always ran out of cartridges Summer weather (not summer by lunclitime, or, if the stuff was time) rather defeats this scheme, coming his way, I've known it to but if one insists on the luxury happen by the end of the first her out to Repulse Bay in a taxí It happened when we took of having a Bre at which to light drive. is solemn-faced louder a spill, one must submit to a trifle, would come up to you, and "Please, the other night, of sweltering.
yir, could you lend the master, a
of
THE LAST WORD
Mr. Winston Churchill had to give the mud a final stirring before capitulating. There isn't a doubt
that the issues raised in his charges against Sir Samuel Hoare and Lord Derby warranted a close investigation, but the quiry com- pleted, and complete exoneration reported. Mr. Churchill might have fet the matter rest. Ife will, of
at yesterday's meeting of Hong-course, he forgiven. His penchant kong Brewers and Distillers, for schoolboy exercises among the Ltd. Expressing the view that mare's-nests a well known.
and understood. it is questionable whether tradi- tional policy should be rigidly adberest
to
AIR RACE
was
ridge and pheasant shoot rounit is like a swan's (You must come up This good fellow had a big part. | No-no! Ha! Ha!) Her neck is
house in England, and a 6,000-
We
Editor's Note: Don't you think you'd better stop!
Eddie's Note: · That's' funny. She said the very same thing
"What'n the heck?" we said. "Missie say "stop," said the driver.
"Drive on, she wasn't talking to you," we replied.
No, I do not use patent lighters. handful cartridges? We've We were proceeding fine when. They either smell of petrol or are shot more than we bargained for," the driver stopped the car. short of it. Besides, using them
HE WON-AND LOST. hardly seems playing the game for a nian whose hobby is being thrifty One humorist bet the rest of us with matches.
once that he wouldn't be called an An acquaintance of mine is one to subscribe a second time. So Britain is to embark upon a of the most generous women that took him, and he won. Our excel later all pains to point pigantic programme of air force ever happened. I
am always lent host shot with a twelve-bore out that he was not advocating development. Six hundred first- chary of admiring any of her abandonment of that policy, butine inchines, twenty new are possessions, na the odds are, if I The joker, when called upon by the So did all the rest of us. gun.
When we got out to Repulse that he merely desired the mat-dromes and a vast increase in per-do, she will promptly present it host's loader for a lonn of am-
sonnel are to be the first moves in to me. ter to be investigated thorough-the game, for once begun, we shall
Bay, she ran all the way up from munition on the drive but one She is, and always has been, before lunch, said, "Certainly, but the beach to the hotel. ly. What are the circumstances always be struggling to keep up a rich woman. She has never had I've only got sixteens, und I'm When we naked her why, she which create any doubt on the with whatever nations choose to any financial reason for buying in afraid they're no use. They
Bet the pace. After that
the cheapest market, but looking weren't, of course, and so he drew said she was being chaste. at the matter impartially I should from us. But I failed to see that say she has made that one of her ad at any more of our gallant
fe interests: She chief
will host's shooting parties. tramp miles of streets to get material two-pence a yard ches-go out of his way to stand a £5 Why is it that a man who will per; she spends an hour a morn dinner to a couple of his friends ing telephoning for grocery quota- tens, And the address of a cut-Cannot restrain himself from cady- price face powder merchant is the cach of them? I don't know.
ing a three-ba'penny stamp from most accepinble Christmas gift you it in a statistical fact that even the can offer her.
S. MOUTRIE & CO., LTD. issue? They are, acording to only be necessary to construct gas- will
York Building
Are
Mr.
Chater Road.
You-
ECONOMISING?
IF SO, YOU CANNOT DO BETTER
THAN INVESTIGATE THE NEW
RANGE OF DRESS FABRICS WHICH WE HAVE JUST RE- CEIVED.
"TOOTALS**
In a
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A new Printed Rayon Fabric by Tootals. Smart designs and beautiful shades,
$2.95.
Piece Goods Department.
LANE, CRAWFORD, LTD.
Dodwell.
two in bomb shelters in every other street number-the
and to supply the entire civilian | surrounding
population with masks for
the of the Colony with the barrier country to become thoroughly air- reefs of high tariffs, and our conscious. i dwindling entrepot trade. Tariff
impositions. by neighbouring
countries are not, however, any- thing new, although admittedly they were never so high as at present. Hongkong's free port status, which Mr. Dodwell con- cèdes hins been fully justified in the past, is based on its peculiar position as a distributing centre, a position which has not been changed by the fact that China has raised her tariff walls. The volume of our exports has un- doubtedly decreased as a con- sequence of the higher tariffs,
WILL OF MASSES
"The core of the American tradi- Tugwell, is to be found itt a kind tion," according to Dr. Rexford of defunce to fate." Dr. Tugwell, who is either a smart young man In a big job or a fearful bogey-man with laws that seven feet, de pending on the point of view, made this remark before the American Washington. He Society of Newspaper Editora in was trying 10 make clear that the administration welcomes criticism, and that any can life in defiance of the will of attempt at rezimentation of Ameri- the masses would be foredoomed to failure. And in his remark there is a shrewd appreciation of a fundamental part of the charac but the adoption of preferential ter of the people part - which duties by Hongkong would do both radicals and conservatives nothing towards the recapturing tend to overlook.
THE TEST
of lost trade. On the contrary, the effect might very well be to curtail our exports even further
The people, as a whole will not still. The only possible argu- and coercion cannot make them. do what they do not want to do. ment which can he put forward They can be fooled, but not for in favour of preferential duties long. They have ultimately a is that they would protect local Here is an excellent point to keep anving irreverence for authority. industries from competition. in mind. It makes the terrors of If we are to judge from Mr. Communism. Fascism, and so on Champkin's remarks, however, much less terrifying; for all such the Colony's newly-established receive genalue popular endorse- schenies must, sooner or later,
brewery stands in no need of ment or run their keels upon the such protection, for he pointed hard rock of stubborn contrariness -which is just another way of out that the only embarrassment saying that in the end the honest which the Company feols is not | wish of the majority will prevail. the finding of adequate markets,
but the impossibility of keeping sult would be a gradual fritter- pace with increasing demands ing away of our free port status. for the Company's products. accompanied by inevitably in- Taking a broader view, however, creased living costs. We are the case for protection locally is living in unusually depressing shorn of much of its power from times, and the danger is that the fact that we are not in any ments
we may be tempted into experi- delrimental to the large sense a producing centre. Colony's best interests. The Moreover, once n concession were Colony has been built up on its made to one industry, there transit trade, and any step which would be insistent demands from free flow of commerce must be threatens to interfero, with the smaller concerns.
The net reviewed with misgiving.
HER OVERHEAD CHARGES,
Last time 1. saw her she was
being driven off to a country town dozen eggs. seventy miles away to buy four
•
But
most open-handed of humans have a curious streak of meanness in them somewhere, and on the dis- taff side the most generous of them
has usually two.
You know what the NA- terisks mean as well as we de, so don't gef coy with us. If you people who rend this column would only stop Icer- ing and remember that this Is our bread and butter, we could cut our job down by half.
..
*
It's funny what supreme The funny part of it ls, they are optimists modern girls are.
nearly always concerned with
"My dear," she said, "I see in irining economies that do not mat. Miranda, for instance, is always the paper they're only elghtpence- ter. However, I suppose we must looking on the bride side. When ba'penny dozen there, and my all be equipped with our private we are out with Miranda, we try grocer here wants elevenpence. amusements, or this machine-made and avoid the subject of wed-
which is robbery. Bye-bye."
world would not be Bitch A Petrol's 1s. Gd a gallon. flow pleasant place to live in.
"I never miss a domestic selence lecture, but I come home and do everything just as I've always done."
ding. Bells remind us too much of bills. You might be un-
aware----
Unaware: the last thing giris take off at night.
of the fact, but the last time we were 'married, we had a nightmare. We dreamt that we were married to our wife. Screaming loudly, we woke up, and found that it was true.
We divorced her shortly after- wards. A chap named Glaxo Was the co-respondent. You must have seen the story of our divorce in all the news- papers. Street hoardings 'and' posters screamed out the aen-
sational news?——
GLAXO—BUILDS BONNY BABIES
+
•
•
Anyway, there's more than one pebble on the beach. *Aa
a matter of fact, when Miranda fell in love with us, wo didn't get a pebble. We got a little boulder.
יי
Sorry we must leave you now.. Don't take us too seriously, girls Our free nights ure Mondays, Wednesday, and FYJ- days.
As our last girl friend said: "I'll be suging you!"