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"WHAT A PERFECT COMBINATION"
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"MOON SONG"
"LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE"
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THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH. TUESDAY, JANUARY 16, 1934.
Save Tyre Expenses
HAVE YOUR TYRES -RETREADED
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ACKNOWLEDGMENT,
Mrn, Emilia Marin Alves and family beg to tender their grateful Acknowledgments to all who have their so kindly conveyed them expressions of condolence in the which they have snd loss sustained by the death of Antonio Luiz Alves.
Hongkong Telegraph.
TUESDAY, JANUARY 16, 1934.
NOTES OF THE DAY
DEBATE IN A VACUUM
The strangest thing about the lang argument in the United States over the government's monetary policy is that so many of those engaged seem to be trying to con- duct the debato in a vacuum.. What the country is getting is, in the main, an radomie discussion of the relative values of money which is anchored firmly to an Im mutable gold. base and money which is flexible. It is an argu- ment, for the most part, which might just as well have been held in 1928, as in 1933. Most of the time the public unrest which makes up the background of all the argu- ment is Ignored entirely. There is plenty of scholarly exponitions on the way Inflation starts and the things it does before it stops, and plenty of historical analyses of what happened In Germany and Russia, but very little mention of the way in which recent economic developments have put pressure on the social fabric.
PRIME FACTOR
HAVOC IN THE PUBLIC The Very Idea!
SCHOOL SPIRIT
By B. L. Jacot, Oxford University and Harlequin
Rugger player.
T was one of the grand old go to sco the game? It's no secret. Edwardian days that the Bate The lingering echoes of Player The-Schooll are driving the horde tle of Waterloo, or of Vinegar Hill,na surely as the lash drives the or somewhere, was won on the column of exfics into the frozen or wastes of Siberin. Each country playing fields of Winchester, Harrow, or some such place, for the its own customs. And I'd chooso safety valves of the public school Siberia,
BATHWATER BALLAD
JE ARE perturbed at a sinister move, moved by
WE
a London "doctor.
He suggests that everyone should have a bath a day.”
What's winter coming to? Much better to be re- ducoed twice a year. It is a well-known fact that we breathe through the pores of
init were mostly blowing steam A WORD OF round the turn of the century. EXPLANATION.
Well-an inquest was held the other day into the death schoolboy of eighteen who col- White Man' in the mentor of pire the skin, which open-and lapsed while on the playing folds building, and so forth, what is shut of his publle school. He was
of. a
It has always puzzled me (a
Burden,
playing Rugby football, and he wrong with the secondary schools? gularity.
Surely if Rugby, or Repton, won
said, as he took the field: "I am the battle of Bunker Hill, tho going to play the game of my fe
"LET'S GET IT STRAIGHT"
with monotonous
ro-
How can a pore breathe under
for the honour of my school!"secondary schools and council water?
schools had a hand income major. unpleasantness somewhere? No one is likely to ask me but, If someone did, I'd say the council schools did a certain amount in the late war.
No one who has played Rugby football is going to deny that as a game, it is a good one. But if any- one knows how a battle was won on Rugby football I would like to meet him. So I imagine would a lot of folk I know at the War Office. I don't like that: " Honour of my school.")
J
It is admittedly difficult to say exactly where President Roose-
Let me
explain quickly here, velt's monetary policy came from,
while the public school spirit is but one thing is certain, it did not
fingering its gun, that few can be come into being in a void. It has
fonder of the game of Rugby foot- been the product of forces some of
ball than I am. I am never in my them out of Presidential control.
for the age able to resist the leafy smelle Economic laws in text-books may
of autumn. The old head-lamps the be important: so. too, snys President, are farmers in debt, In the days when folk used to ad-light up yet, and the nostrils quiver home-ownera burdened with mort- mire hour-glass figures and ride when I first catch the scents of rages they cannot carry, cities on bicycles in Hyde Park the public the dying year. the edge of bankruptcy. All pro-school spirit was steadily working Autumn means goalposts. It due: dissatisfaction with an inflexi- up pressure behind the cork. So means (to the public school spirit ble currency system, a feeling that was its elder brother, "For-the-and to me) that manly smell of may be lilogical, mistaken and Sake-of-the-Old-Regiment, Lance- freshly-churned carth; the pale highly unwise; nevertheless, it is lot!" In Caster times the public slant of the afternoon sun through school spirit could breathe a na-leafless trees, that misty tang to the the prime factor in the situation, and any attempt to settle the tional inspiration into such ideas air which comes with the approach Roundness or unsoundness of the splay-for-the-side. We are off of the whistle for no-side." American monetary policy is value- the Gold Standard now, and a good less if it fails to take it into se-
count,
THE "GRAF ŽEPPELIN"
The Graf Zeppelin can now look back upon the completion of over five years of active service. Dur- ing that time the airship has made more than 300 trips, both long and short Including one world cruise, one cruise into the polar regions, and fity odd transoceanic cross- ings. The total distance covered off these trips amounts to over 700,000 kilometres and 17,500 pas- Bengers, 37,000 kilograms of cargo and 20,000 kilograms of mail have been carried. The airship has been in the air for more than 7,000 hours and has passed through the most varied meteorological and climatic zones. Whether, It has proved a profitable venture, it is more difficult. to say. The main thing is that despite the ill-fortune that has attended the experiments of other countries, Germany is con- tinuing with the development of airship travel. A new Zeppelin, with immensely increased passen- ger accommodation, is expected to take the alr shortly. Her career must be regarded as an acid test,
*
THE BOTTOM BUTTON
Members of the nobility, the theatre, literature, and the business world took part in the discussion recently conducted by a popular London newspaper concerning the question whether the walatcoat's bottom button should or should not be left undone. Each contribu- tor showed a proper sense of the gravity of the subject. From the zeal with which the topic was threshed out one might have sup posed that a wrong decision would have shaken the British Empire. Perhaps this was in part because. the distinguished French writer, Andre Maurois, had just shown that the connexion between the
BOOST HONGKONG !
This is the season of the year when Hongkong attracts to its shores from other parts of the East visitors who find unalloyed our climate, our delight in scenery, and the innumerable facilities which we have to offer for outdoor recreation. Unfor- tunately, however, the number of these visitors is not a'tithe of what it might be were a really serious publicity campaign undertaken in localities within reasonable-reach-of-the-Colony.. At the moment, the only efforts in this direction are those dis- charged by shipping and hotel companies. These are necessari- ly limited in scope, but they do have some effect. Shanghai people come here because they find the weather milder than the rigorous conditions which pre- vail in the North; while from Malaya we get a periodical in- flux of people who want a break- from the enervating climate with which they have to put up year in and year out. A few weeks apent here, with the attractions of such spots as Repulse Bay and the New Territories, to say nothing of the facilities for golf, tennis, walking and yachting, give our visitors an impression of the Colony which they hasten to convey to their friends on their return. This process of spreading the nows of Hong- kong's charms is, however, na- turally very gradual in taking effect. The real need, if we are to secure the maximum benefits from our undoubted assets, is a big, well-organised, consistent plan of boosting the Colony as a
It had been assumed that the winter resort. Other Crown
Prince left the button unfastened Colonies, with no further attrac-
because he was a "stout folla," but tons than Hongkong possesses, now M. Maurois assures the world do not hesitate to branch out that it was merely because he for- along the lines of official publi- got: So did an attentive and city campaigns. The point patriotic people model their social which needs stressing in the Far behaviour on the momentary for- East is that here, close at hand, Hetfulness of royalty. Signs, how- ever, are not wanting to show that there is an unrivalled winter re-
the time is perhaps ripe for a bold sort. If our Chamber of Com- and determined man to turn the merce, retail houses, shipping tide of fashion. Gilbert Frankau, companies and hotels could unite the novelist, anys that he would in a scheme, and secure some "rather go to Ascot in plus-fours" measure of financial aid from the than not leave the bottom button Government, results of a tangi-Reid states that he does so "with undone, but Captain Cunningham- Ele nature should accrue. The more visitors we attract here, the better will it be for business
and these are days when wo can do with anything that helps in this direction. It only re- quires a little enterprise and co- operation for a start to be made. The effort would be worth while, for the rewards would be reaped in due course,
British Empire and bottom-button custom is closer than might ap- pear to the casual glance, His- torians have said that the Empire was acquired in a mood of abstrac- tion, when the British people were and thinking of other things King Edward VII, then Prince of Wales, started the waistcoat but- ton habit in the same way.
•
SARTORIAL DICTATOR.
shame." The Earl of Westmor- land has found that the only autis- factory way is to wear no waist- cont at all. Public opinion is plainly waiting for a load. Any Englishman who to-morrow morn ing fastens his bottom waistcoat button, with a magnificent dis regard for social ostracism, and the scorn of Mr. Frankau, may | find that within a month he bas
become a sartorial dictator.
on
man is a man, who can bite off a "WHY ALL THIS piece for himself., Let's sit round SHOUTING?"
this and get it straight. Honeatly-How, about football as a prospect for winning battles? Not good? I thought not.
-
д
Doctors may come and under takers may go, but the pore are with us. (Classical always
quotation).
Why should water be poured on the poor pore every day?
Consider soap. Stand back a bit and have a look at it..
We know a man named Albert Fruggle, who got soap in his eye. and was only just saved from going blind by a specialist, who recommended a course of front seats at Mae West pictures: Even more tragic was the caso of Esteban Smith, who stood up to wash under his knees, slipped on the soap, and broke tiis neck on the tap.
We mentioned something about sinister movements, earlier in the recitation. Get this under your skull,
There's going to be another in China when the eivil war supporters of the Bath A Day move- ment start wearing badges with the letters" "B.A.D." on them.
We foresee International up- heavals when it is discovered that people we have otherwise trusted have gone over to the B.A.D. organisation.
The sound of autumn is the sound of a well-kicked ball,
But what I am thinking of is Rugby football of early schooldays, Four-fifths of the time wasted | No "gate." No special trains from
a game, and on sports at school, and nine- Waterloo. Just tenths of the time wasted in this great game at that. What comes way at Oxford and Cambridge, later, if you are unlucky enough could be better employed in alto play the game moderately well,
spoils football, most any other way.
What, for instance, of the de- This is what I say when I think cent feelings of the gladiators of all the time and effort wasted themselves? Does the Great Brit on football. Thousands of citizens ish Public ever think of this? Ask used to watch 29 other youths and anyone who has played before big myself playing about with a foot-crowds what he really thinks of ball at week-ends in the winter the crowd. If there Was ong time. A lot of good it did them. thought uppermost in my mind hair. Come out of the bathroom, Or me. If I had spent my time at when playing at Twickenham, Panting. In other words, bo Con- fretwork, at least I could make a Edinburgh, Swansea, Dublin, it pipe-rack now.
was a longing to be let loose for a glorious five minutes in the grandstands with a meat axe.
Why all this shouting? What has the man in the stands got to shout about? Did he do anything? Or did he? What's it got to do with him, anyway?
It used to worry me, but I know. now that the man in the stands is
We do not wish to cause alarm, bat it seems to us that the bath a day suggesion is just the thin edge of the wedge, which will lead on to
a cold shower every morning.
We advise caution. Wot the eyes with one end of a towel. Ruffle the
Bervative,
If you MUST sing. REMEM- BER....sheet music.
You can sing it in bed.
•
Five essential rules for people themselves who want to make "popular" at the movies are pub- lished by the Viennese Kleine Volkszeitung.
"Here they are, to bo read sympa--
I often wonder what I shall do when some son of mine asks me what a dropkick is. Sometimes I imagine I shall give a demonstra tion without the ball as a target, That would be when I'm thinking about making a good game Intoj business for the sake of some odd thousands who want to shout about something without unduly expos- ing themselves to the risk of In-yelling his head off because Flay-thetically by all movie-goers:→→
Up-The-School! is still echoing 1. Always come in late. Your jury. *
At other times, thinking, per- down the vaulted caverns of his neighbours like getting up. It's better if you choose the wrong seat haps, of a certain preparatory
first. school with only an exiguous line He la cheering the public school 2. Take off your overcoat 80 ns of bright caps along the touch-spirit, and I'll bet that if you to knock off the spectacles of the lines for a "gate," I can picture watch him that evening you will
person in the row. behind and the hat of the woman next you. myself producing a ball with pride see him brush naide his fourth while: probably explaining why it has cocktail, muttering the a pointed end, north and south.
What is it that makes the ap- proaches to the Rugby Union
youth.
For The Sake - of-The-Old - Ro- giment-Lancelot!
-You have the whole sad business
ground at Twickenham impassable in a nutshell in those fatal six on the occasion of the University words:.. "For the honour of my Match? How many of the crowd school!"
Hambler
"All this talk about Wagnor and Beethoveni
ing to ruin this, band?”
Are you try
3. Always join the stars in sing- ing the film songs. People have come to hear your voice.
4.
Tell people what is coming. Those around you are idiots, and
you know so much better.
5. Jump up and hustle but be- fore the film is over. You have been seen enough anyway.
++
•
Charlly Begins At Home.
If the organisera of charity affairs would like to use our name In order to squeeze guineas from snobs to help the poor, they may do so on the following terms:-
For Edward Kelly: 50 per cent. of the profits.
I
For less distingished patrons: 49 per cent, of the profits.
For the poor: 1 per cont, of the profits, less organising expenses.
*
CELEBRATIONS
This week we shall celebrate the 14th anniversary of the "Very Idea."
Soon after that we shall start celebrating Chinese New Year.
Then we shall celebrate Chinese New Year itself, and soon after. that we shall celebrate Easter.
Soon after that we shall eclebrato the Awful Child's birthday, and soon after that we shall celebrate the other Awful Child's birthday.
Then wo Bhall' celebrato, our birthdays, and, soon after that wa ahall colobrate Christmas. Boon after that we shall celebrate the 3rd anniversary of "Very Idea" and soon after that
The Editor: You start celebrat ing Christmas again?
Ed. Kelly: Yes. And soon after that we shall celebrate the Now Year.....
The Editor: And so begin" another year of wasteful de- bauchory 7--
Ed. Kelly: That's right,
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