THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH,"
MIXED GRILL
A Merry Miscellary Ashley Sterne
NANKING MILITARY
CONFERENCE.
FENG'S PLEDGE TO HELP CHIANG.
LOYANG TO BE ATTACKED.
An important military confer- An American doctor has struck | Ilon-year-old skull of an ape, which out in a new line for a medical man. Dr. Pilgrim of the Indian Geolo- ence was held in Nanking, under Addressing Rutherford (New Jer-gical Survey, recently discovered the chairmanship of Gen. Chiang Boy) Rotary Club, he gave his.,audi- there. What Crumpett doesn't
Kai-shek during the week-end, ne- ence a number of hints, not on how know about apes' skulls Isn't "worth to keep well, but on how to be knowing, notwithstanding that encording to advices just received
And now that a precedent has vious rivals declare that what he
here. The aim was to formulate been established, I can foresce other does know isn't worth knowing folks whose livelihoods depend on either. Crumpett has examined plans for the continuation of the the ills and woes of mankind burst- the skulls of all the fossilised apes Anti-Northern Punitive Expedi ing forth in similar manner. Un- which have been discovered during tion and, after lengthy discussion, dertakers will circularise us with the last thirty years, and has been
it was resolved (1) that a dele- suggestions as to the most effective greatly struck by their similarity
gate should be sent to interview and convenient methods of demise. in shape and size to his own, From
Gen. Yen, Shih-shan, Tupan of the Officiala of the Bankruptcy Court this he evolved the theory that he
Model Province of Shansi, and will offer us hints on how most himself was the Missing Link which efficaciously to ruin ourselves. Op- anthropologists had for so long Marshal Feng Yu-hsiang and se- cure their co-operation; and (2) ticians will issuo instructions on been searching, and he prepared a
that Gen. Ho Ying-yin, commander- how to contract astigmatism, and long paper on the matter which he the manufacturers of cosmetics wanted to read before the Royal in-chief of the Eastern Army will tell us how best to become hide- Society., The Royal Society, how-Route, should be vested with full ous and repulsive, while plumbers ever, told him that they did not authority to attack Marshals Sun and Chang Tsung- will advise us on the matter of thor-wish to put him to the trouble of Chuan-fang oughly congesting the drains... reading his paper, as it would be chang.
quite sufficient for the purposes of.. his argument if he just walked on to the platform and showed himself to the audience.
In this connexión I may mention that my young friend, Mr. Beasley Tosher, so widely known as the Plumber's Poet, has just published an admirable little volume entitled "How To be a Poet." It contains one of the most lucid and instructive accounts of how not to be a. poet that I ever rend.
At a recent auction sale a bird's egg was sold for £15. On making some subsequent inquiries as to what species of bird the egg be longed to to command so high at price, I learned that it was an egg of the original bird which was worth two in a bush. I must attend some of these auctions of curios. I have Jong wished to possess the original rolling stone that gathered
no mosa,
*
Old Professor Barmion Crumpett seems to be making rapid progress as a mahatma! The other night (ac tells me in a long letter from Bombay just to hand) he succeed- ed in projecting his astral body. He had spent the whole of the even- ing in the cocktail bar of the Smuji Hotel. He admits to hav ing from time to time refreshed himself, since he finds his 'powers of deep meditation on spiritual mata ters greatly enchanced by dry Mar* tinis; but as I stated last week he is leading a very abslomious life, except merely in the matter of food and drink. Anyhow, on retiring to bed he went to the dressing- table as usual to comb his whiskers, when he distinctly saw two images
&
of himself in the mirror. He adds that this could not possibly have been a delusion, as he careful- ly courted them on several occa- sions, and always made them come to two. To be able to project my astral body, if only for an inch or two, after but one week's practice,” he concludes, "encourages me to think 1 shall soon become a very powerful mahatma, I shall then issue a Challenge to the present Mahatma-in-Chief, Dam Ras Khal, for the World's Astral-Body-Pro-
eeting Championship.
Talking about Crumpett, how ever, I shouldn't be in the least sux- prised to receive a frightfully sud- den cable from him that he has chucked the maliatma business and gone bimbling off to Bilaspur State in the Central Provinces to examine the fossilised remains of the mil-
COLONIAL AFFAIRS.
QUESTION OF INFORMATION DISCUSSED.
London, May 13. The question of improving ma- chinery for making trade con- cassions in various colonies better known to the people of this country and of extending information of the raw productions of the colonies and the commercial varietics and requirements of the colonies, was discussed at the Colonial Conference to-dny.
In this connexion there was a dis- cussion on the usefulness of the work of the Imperial Institute at London. South Kensington, in There was general agreement that the work of the Institute was of immediate value, and served as a clearing house of information, though it was felt that if the Ins titute were more centrally situated in London it would be visited by larger numbers of people.
It was also shown that firms who desired to exploit a raw material, found that the institute provided useful information as to its com- mercial potentialities.
-
*
★
In a lengthy telegram to Gen. Chinng on Sunday, Marshal Feng Yu-hsiang said that he was des patching a large number of his troops to attack Loyang, Marshal "The white leaf," says Sir W-Wu Pel-fu's stronghold, via Tung- Jam Arbuthnot Lane, "is utterly kunn, but that he himself would re- insufficient to support life." All main in Shenai to direct operations the same, Sir William, I have seen from the rear. The Christian a alice of it support a bit of ripe General pledged his allegiance to gorgonzola, and if that's not life, Gen. Chiang and promised to co what is?
operate with him, but urged him at the same time to continue "the expedition against the northern militarists.
Summum Benum.
The day was very dreary and the
akies were evercust;
And my best girl hadn't written me for nigh a fortnight pust;
I'd that horrid sinking feeling both
in body and in Mind,
Marshal Chang Tso-lin is also reported to have sent a personal representative to Shansi to per- suade Gen. Yen Shih-ahan to re- main loyal to the Fengtien cause.
And a lot of other troubles of a dis.In view of Shansi's geographical
concerting kinil;
position, the. Model Tuchun's at-
A letter from a heartless, greedy,itude is being watched with much,
grasping landlord, who,
Informed me that last quarter's
rent way two week's overdue:
A huge bill from my tailor asking
something on necount,
And another from a buckie for a
further large amount, Then on top of these catastrophes Fate yet another brought;
1 received a jury summons for the
local Coroner's Court!
O, misfortunes don't come singly
but in a market-bunch,"
I muttered, as I took my hat, and
rumbled off to lunchi.
A little hour later, and my troubles
all were 'er:
Gone was my depression; I was
Ma's bright boy once more; Forgotten were the incidents of
sorrow and of pain,
For I'd had some young asparagus,
and life was good again!
Nature Notes..
The double-crested bog-tweedler (or lesser spifle) has been heard on Hackney Marshes.
A piebald pilgepipar (or blonter- faced gunting) has been seen in Kensington Gardens.
487 more enckoos yesterday or rived in England from wherever it, is cúckoos go to hibernate.
A bee was observed to be swarm- ing freely in a field near Rickmans- worth yesterday,
An early stinkwort has been found in full smell in a hedge at Chipping Sodbury.
a
A stuffed albatross in the hall of Margate boarding-house has, just laid twenty-years, after its first stuffed egg.
PROFESSOR PISLER..
FINAL PERFORMANCE TO-NIGHT,
At the Lee Theatre last night Professor Pisler gave another de- monstration of his occult powers: To-night at 9.15 he gives his final performance, and all should avail themselves of this opportunity to see him. The wonders he per- forms have to be seen to be be- lleved.
"Spell-bound" in the S.C.M. Post was quite correct when he stated that the Hongkong publie are not giving the Professor the support he merits, 30 wake up Hongkong, and see this last per- formance of the professor's to- night at 9.15 at the Lee Theatre Contribubed,
Discussion took place on existing and future trade agencies in Lon- don. The question was debated how far it would be possible to con- centrate and centralise various agencies where they represented colonies in one part of the world, like West and East Africa, and where they lend themselves to grouping. British Wireless.
interest. It was due, it will be re- called, to Gen. Yen's assistance and his allegiance to the Fengtien. party that Marshal Feng Yu- hsiang and his troops were driven from Peking last year.
The Nationalist Government in Nanking has appointed the follow- ing men to take charge of the funeral arrangements of the late Dr. Sun Yat-sen: Dr. Wu Chac- chu, Gen. Chiang Kai-shek, Gen.- Wu Te-chen, and Messrs. Yang Heng-fuh, Teng She-yu, Chen Chun and Koo Ying-fun.
THE COLONY'S. FINANCES.
EXCESS OF EXPENDITURE OVER REVENUE,
The financial returns for 1926
of the Colony of Hongkong, which have now been gazetted, show a reflection at the times through which we are passing.
The actual revenue for last year was $21,131,581.64, compared with $23,244,364.94 in 1925, show- ing a net decrease of $2,112,- 784.30.
The actual expenditure in 1923 was $23,524,715.94, compared with $28,266,817.04 in the preceding year, this reflecting the economy introduced by the Government.
However, the expenditure last year, it will be observed, exceeded the revenue by $2,393,134.30.
AMERICA'S RUBBER
PRODUCTION.
BIG OUTPUT OF TYRES REPORTED.
New York, May 13. The tyre output of the United States in March was the largest in the history of the industry.
The Rubber Association's figures show that the tyres produced totull- ed 6,349,000, and shipments were 5.781,000. Stocks in hand total 11,792,000.
was
The Department of Commerce re- ports that the production of re claimed rubber last year 180.000 tons, and the consumption was 164,000 tons, compared with 141,000 and 137,000 respectively in 1925-Reuter's American Service,
."
The Great Northern Railway Sta- tion at Londonderry was the scene recently of an attack by a young man on a girl, whom he slashed in the throat with a razor. The girl, Florence Power, aged 24, a native of Dundalk and employed in a city drapery establishment, was meet ing her sister at the train, and both went to the ticket-ofce to inquire about holiday train arrangements when the man drew a razor across her throat, inflicting a deep gash, As the girl collapsed her assailant fled and flung away the razor. He was pursued by a ticket checker. Later a man was arrested and taken Mieg to Victoria Police Station. Power was taken in a critical con- dition to the City Infirmary,
--
SATURDAY, MAY 14. 1927.
She'd Adore A Wrist Watch
WE PREDICT: That you will chose for her a dainty wrist watch at Ullmann's. That she will thank you from her heart. That she'll be proud to wear such a beautiful gift. That you will be grateful for this prediction from
Ullmann's.
J. ULLMANN & CO.
Alexandra Building. Chater Road.
If it bears
the label-
KRAFT
CHEESE
IT'S GOOD!
FROM ALL HIGH-CLASS STOREKEEPERS
Sole Agents:-Connell Bros. Co. Bank of Canton Building.
CONCRETE FLOORS.
made
WEARPROOF-DUSTPROOF-WATERPROOF
with
A Guaranteed Concrete Hardener.
If you are interested in results let us tell you more about it.
Fresh Stocks, Just Arrived.
SHEWAN, TOMES & CO.
Sole Agents.
BOOKS & PAPERS
Latest News of the Oorld. Sporting, Children's and all kinds and Children's of Home papors, Magazines, Ladies' Fashions, Leach Publications, Story Books Novels, Tit-Bits, The Humorist, etc. and also Stationery of all kinds. OBTAINABLE AT
VICENTE ATIENZA & Co.
Tol. K. 155
54, Nathan Road, Kowloon.
BRAND
RICKSHAW"
CEYLON TEA Cheapest and Best From all leading Compradores. PRICE $1.00 PER LB.
Be Guided by the Quality-Not the "Price.
FOR DEPENDABLE TAILORING Before placing your order for Summer Suits, Coats or Trousers you should see the selection we are showing. It is larger and better than ever before. There is a delightful range of Palm Beach Cloths from $25.00 per suit which are guaranteed for Washing, and Wearing.
NEW CLOTHS IN GABERDINES, SERGES, LINENS and DRILLS
Wm. POWELL Ltd,
There is
The Tailors and Outfitters.
12. DES VOEUX ROAD -
Only One Gramophone
that has increased the existing Musical Range of Gramophone music in true balance by a further 50% to six Octaves: AND THAT GRAMOPHONE IS-
The Viva-tonal Columbia.
Listen for the Difference at
THE ANDERSON MUSIC Co., Ltd.-
KLASt. George's Building.
SPECIAL
SCOTCH WHIS
Do
OF
BIRKCALDY
DON WHISKY IS AGED AND UNIFORMLY GOOD-IT IS THE FAVOURITE OF PRE-WAR DAYS.
The flavour and excellence of DON is the secret of many generations of distilling. You have missed DON since the war, but now it is back to you again-oxactly the same quality as before. You will not be disap- pointed!
At your club or store.
N.S. Moses & Co., Ltd.
Agents
JEAN
VALJEAN "Truly a Cigar
ch
ABAQUERIA FILIPINA
LEADING TOBACCONISTS
IN THE FAR EAST
Page 15Page 16