THE
STRANGE EXPERI ENCE OF A CABINET
MINISTER,
|
THE
Ascotio and pions wore the faces GF the first; humorous, convivial, and Hibernian the faces of the be wigged. The President's faco [imoyabo imagined.
HONGKONG
SHORT STORIES.
*
H
Mr. Slintson-" Willio, didn't you go to the trank-akor's yesterday, and, toll frim to send round the trunk. I ordered?'",
Wille-"Yes, pa."
*
TELEGRAPH
SATURDAY APRIL
"Where did he team to bo so untidy?"
"Why, he was in the New York custoin house for four years,"
Hostous
Disappointed. will you have some bread and butter, darling??***
I
Small Boy Broad and butter! thought this was a party?"
Injudicious. You no poly are to make trouble by advising to average man to use his own
bost judgment.
THE SCOT WHO WENT BACK
1961
A SHORT SERMON.
"Everywhere I go I 500 the there is no reason why marked imprint of the Scot. He is your prosperity fhould not continue to top dog every tune. Take your attend the efforts of the diligent THE UNIVERSAL-SOLVENT, Parliment" But I stopped Tow who liberally give of their limo dám. “No,” I said, take any-and talent in-emoting-healthy A new commandment I give
into you, That ye lovo önö sacrilegious hands there." lion who have oiled during the sous thing but that lay not your recreation. And of the men
motlier--St. John, xlii, 31. wo both lilighed. -
a
on on must mention the handi- |*
For the enres, burdens and in- capping committee of live capable
ou, Mr. J. Spittles who is the equalities that weigh mon down, goma, gontus" who directs with those who would help their fel- consummato kill the dostinios lows have long been seeking a of the bar, Mr. Phillips who con- solvent. trols the purso strings, and Mr.
To the observor who thinks and
"Seriously," ho went on after time, “there is no sonse of pro- portin here; you liso in extrends; wealth at one end; sirvation at the other; goilings hero the very devil thora it is not life at all it is fleeting ex- Storrie, the energetic secretary. feels it is impressively patonit that istonce that is not for me. I am The efforts of those officials are something should be done to less- going home."To bring youtably seconde, and no man deen, or at least equalize in some brother back with you, Ilmost serves-med-of praise-more-way, the load that has to be borne.
! than the "Old Man,” who might What is there to be done? snoerod.
The Socialist has his romody, be looked upon as the G. 0. M. of the clab. His heart is in tho the Single-Tax his, the Free- work, and every nombor has re-Trador his, and so on through i gnised his sterling wortli whic-long list of sy tons of philosophy thor on comunitten or in the and political economy. execution of other duties.
Socing the number of boats and the various classos now com- rising the fleet, who must readily
Each faction is so suro that all other factions are radically wrong: that the gonoral hand, which should be helping, hangs palsied
tho difliculty ox- und useless.
Who Won ?-The late Duke of Wellington got a letter once from [BY "RETLAW"] -
a lady, saying she was soliciting The whole company, having subscriptions for a certain church, The President of the Board of bowed to the President, by and had taken the liberty to put Trade sat in a very easy chair in a sono iniraculous menus found his name down for 200, and
ry luxurious study. It wanted seats.
They were cortainly hoped he would promptly aund. for minutos to midnight, but far more at onse than the Pre-her a choque for that amount. He
President felt no inclination sidont, for thoy
by chatted amongst forthwith replied that he would for bod. He had been vastly therasalvos, in quiet, and decorous rospond to the enll; but lip, too, irritated in the House of Con-tones, whilst the President, laud-was interested in a certain church monsthat evening. Gortain dled up in his very comfortable which nooded subscriptions, and, impertinent private monor, arm-chair, sat gaping with drop-counting upon his correspondent's who scorned the party whips and ped jaw and, bulging eyes.
well-known liberality, he had put word for over clamouring for the
hor down for £200," And so, "Come, Misther Prisidint," pre- introduction of business methods sently said one of the bo-wiggod,
ho concluded, “no money, pearl-| into the business of government,th' Board is awaitin' yer bannor's.
pass between us,”
BY ALICK FRASER.] -- lad persisted in asking him pleasure. Will yoz be kondens
isa pour joke," he added; perplexing questions. One had Light take the chair; for ut's
I met him in the Strand. He and I regretted my rashness the audacity to inquire who late at is, begob, hnd n divil av a
was down at heel. Aly over rapidScotland," he went on, may be constituted the Board of Trade, distance hayo wa conto, and, by
ly wandered from his latterod only the mursory of the wider He, the President, had escaped Saint Pathrick; the same distance
bowlorto his hungry-looking boots lands, but it is good enough for me for the time being by asking for bays we tu go back before dawn." Mr. Simson"Well, here is that seemed to have nibbled his The Scots wha Huo' get an in
trousers and loft the fringes London; the Scots wha Hinna notice of that question. Another had desired to be informed when the chair-very melt in the chair
"The President is already in the trunk, but no strap,'
Willie-Yes, Fa; but I told eloquent of privation. I had maun tak tag the road-back The Board hud Inst mot might say observed my of him thought you hadn't better-own-hi.of.old.to.bo-carefully again. It is no place for the President had been forced to the priestly party. "I tako it have any strap,"
caroless of We very and the heavy dadení~” | recogniso reply that it would not be that the meeting now open.
been folloy silents, and inthoso. But I pulled him up. He was Father of the Fair Uno-"How ; far-off days ho hdgived from hour looking beyond me towards to the public interest satisfy Whorefore it is innmiento can you possibly think of marry-tour. He took no thought of cold North, and thore was that in the lion member's overizomning | us to proceed to business. It is ing my daughter? You say that by what was to come.. curiosity at that
his eye that brought a lump into Whereupon a Ulfid untochist budu
ionic strictest economy you can save lind found the beaten track my throat: of the Australian beefworm.
only ten dollars a month!"
We boil rose. He had told mo sprung to his foot and skod
to London. He had had the whether the Board ever had not, Stidy, yer holy rivirence,
Voor But, Worthy Punt, Greok idea of inflexible fato, but nothing of London and the things and, if so, where. The Presidenterit another of the bowigge driven into a corner, had affected party, rising to his foet and glares, but if wo both savo, it will be nothing could quench the fires of he had seen. But he had brought
twenty dollars!'
his optimism. When ho had been me into touch with life. Ho not to hear the question, and hading trulently at the last spenkor..
"A clogen-hoofer umfimal, The Coward the big steamer told that fatalism reduced man to was a wanderer, homeless and "It's quare, thig tu me if assumed an indifferant ense which his flushed chooks bad:beliod.
ye're qualified tn, spake on thot had left the pier. The young the level of lower creation he an-friendless. But he lived his life, And now, oven in the silent subject. Yo're in Ar-rehbishop, man on the tar-barrel still waved swered that at least man had and the qualities that have mulo roached the sunnitis of the organic his race conquerors kept him from soclusion of his study, those grant yer-whether Crummer his handkerchief desperately, battling questions still hunter Reginald Pulo 1 know noth; what'er you waiting, for? scale, for man know that he was the river. He held out his hand. him. A choice rigar had filed but if ye wor the Pope, av Rome Coupon," said his companions, impelleil irresistibly along a fixed "No," he shook his head, “1 |path; lower creation did not.. want nothing." Then added: to soothe his ruffled Berres. A hisself-good luck lo. wnuts disgustedly,
"Aw could do wì' a smoke." 1 Here was a Scot typical of his had a cigar. His oyo grow bright. modorato pog of tor-year-old noself that' il denay yer right ta
race it all save-in hard-headed Aut he left me in cloud. 1 Highland whisky and brought spake concarnin' the hoof-wor-glance backwari, him no surconse of sorrow. Thom
perseverance, fle was a living stood a second, and he turned. Such is the sprightly descrip-simple words, the only course of latest novel, bauned by the cir-
upistle of failtiro. And it came,
Momories," he shouted back; tion given of the handicapper, culating libraries, had calmod
to me suddenly that I should liko him not at all. He was annoy
The Maid Missourian-Mis- to talk to my friend of the far-faro my favourite siiot. Forhaps At times, it is said, it seems as
And he was gone, Edinburgh!
for the handicapper is the butt ed-vory much annoyed; and the
tress (ba new mid)" Above all times and learn of this human some other day we may meet-in if the author was nonr the truth; longer lie brooded over the cause
things, I expect you to be re-document something of his phile- I had furious drons that night of satire and sarcasm, and the of his annoyance to greater his
tice,"
sophy of life. He would have of Sandy with his bigpipes in the opinious ladle out would dis- annoyance became.
Muid=“Yes, ma'am, certainly, passo me though the eyes be-Abloy; and of posts, long dead, concert many mo In long (Curiously); But what is there trayed in: he recognised me as come to life again
Kong I doubt, not that he smiles to be retirént about?'
I bad him-perhaps by instinct. For the years hid loft-thoir im- print on us both,
vilege to use the
·
daron," with one fearful
"What's the matter ?***
Sho a field gloss," said the
}
"I willingly admit, that 1-know nothing about the matter," replied | young pian. the Archbishop humbly, “bat! venture to say that you are in no better case; How should you, gentlemen, ne-time Speakers of The Irish House of Coinmons-au He had stoked his rigar office abolished more than down to the last inch, reached hundred years ago-how. should that point in his story whore the you know, any more than we of unconventional heminé runs away the Episcopal benchi, the habits with the non-moral hero, and and manners of the Australian drained the last drop of his glass | beef-worn?" of whisky, when the solemn
a
A Common Error What was the greatest mistake you ever made your life?" uskol’the youthful sweker after knowledge, "Un's out av order youre-happant when was a chimes of Big Ben nunced fontairely!" cried several of "the very young infin, and consisted the hour of michiglit. At the hewigged party. "Let the I've of thinking Leouldn't make ang,' isme moment the outermost of sidint spak."
replied the old codger, the double doors of his study was hea tu open. There was no mistaking the sound, for the pneumatic spring whose duty is was to keep that-yuter door fist|fidence."
The President of the Board-of
wards."
solete!"
19
Can
I've soen.
perienced in hulicapping races, Orthodox roligion, which has which include every boat from all along boon the bousting gutf- the largest to the smallest. Titodian of the real remedy, hus. position of the anticapper is by proved itself so powerless to be no means a "bod of roses, and of rent benefit that its vory oxist the "Yachting Monthly. aptly once as a vital forec among the describes the handicappor from a
What is that real romedy? sailing ugember's point of view is now widely threatened."
It is LOVE,
**Whon Jesus of Nazareth, snid,," distinguished for the thick-Anow.commandment l givo unto noss of his skin on who you, That yo love one another," holds Polaginn views in res-ho uttored words which stamped pect to original sin, and who | him as the greatest reforiner of w eventually enjoy the all time, to date, punishment of tho imposit le added to the Decaloguo a ont in a future state; a boing greator than any of its ton injunc Lions. lio kummed up, in a fow
without friends! "
culor.
treatment which will euro the common ills of life, figuratively spoaking.
For if we loved one another, how quickly and easily our con- tentions would vanish! flow speedily would our monnness and our greed and our false methods
1 is the sort of love that is best
means dovotion
น
to
Thus it comes that what ond
at the strong Scottish_necont of of business give place_to_honosty~~- a yachting friend, and rovels in | and just consideration! How THE YACHTING SEASON. vigorous rishisms of swiftly we would come to what Sonorous son of Ering and mon might truly call the begin- We went who we could talk
after a pauso when the crining of the millennium! and think. - Houstounded me: he was the very porsonification-of-
Drawing to a Close. tics are oxliausted--thero is pouco. boisterous good nature. I thought
in the land, and sportsmen wished to imply that we should It is hardly probable that Jesus the struggle for existence, would (By Our Special Correspondent) recognise that the undicapper bo bound together in one groat is not infallible, and luts done anion of affection. There is a have soured him. Perhaps.it was
his best as between man and higher definition of love thon A Race Against Time.-Visitor that I had forgotten for the Trade, finding harm, was in (at Navy Yard) Why such ex-moment the attributes of the race
-Now that the yachting season man. Fortunatufy, his sense of thr ended him, had by this time-treme husto in the building of that from when he had sprung had is drawing to a close, so far as honour is never challenged. recovered mensaro of CORE Drewhought? There is no pro- thought more of his dress than of actual racing events are concorn- The racing-has-gone-off-very-It is the definition actoď by ·
|spect of war, is there ?"
his philosophy. Fwas delighted. ed, perhaps a glance back over smoothly again this year, thanks Jesus himself, who "sq loved" that shut had a voico of its own. AL "My lords and gentlemon," ho Naval Officer (Construction De-He sat on a bench the very symbol the season's sport might be inter-boing due fone informant insists) he laid down hislifo. overy effort it cried aloud for oil said, rising and bowing profound-artment) Oh, no, we're sin of the hills and the heather: his sting to those who have the sport to the untiring energy of the
It does not take one long to ly, for heaven's sake toll no ly trying to get her tone and talk was as the rugged graadour of kings at heart, and who are committee in trying to please defined altruism Allenism.
which mombers of the junior yacht club, | øveryone. think disturbing, croopy thoughts who and what you are and why launched before she becomes ob of his native Lochnagar.“ when the clocks are striking
the C.Y.C "Ave been in your London/a
There are incidents galore humanity service to others; tho twelve. Between the first creak you are hero.”
The stoady growth of the in clubdom that would strange opposite of what is commonly that announced the opening of Surely, Mr. President," se Ja Line --Suttor➡" Your week," he said; "it disappoints Corinthian Yacht Club floot 1 appeal to one who delights in implied by the term solfishness. the outer door and the silent plied on of the Archbishops, daughter, sir-well, er-that-isme. Why? I'll tell yo." Man of has placed the once little humour The Three Mon in And so, guarding against any opening of the inner one, the surely you recognize the moshe told me to come to you-she course, is more sociable than any and insignificant: sailing club a Boat" are to be seen aften-misconception as to the meaning thoughts of the President of theory of your Board! Hearing of says you
hee; he is clubbable," as Johnson on a
par with
any yacht times near the C.Y.C. They of "love" as here used, we may Board of Trade sped Urough his four difliculties in the House of Pater-"Quite so- under- interpreted Aristotle's phrase. club east of Suez, and even sur- defy the elements, and in-say, That yo serve or consider or brain at lightning speed. The Commons, wo have stepped down stand. Let's see, are you Mr. But what is the result here; you passing many. This must be small motor boat they steal off work for one another, know Mrs. President was in bed, from the Elysian Fields to give Bronson or Mr. Wibbles?" are in a whirlpool—-” I stop attributed to the keon enthusiasm and doubted not that she was yon a leg-up. Bohold in us mem- Suttor Why, I'm Mr. Hotch-ped him, noting at the time that of the members, and their loyalty trio in the club. Their eloquence of us do not even attempt to do. on a trip the heavy and biggest This is exactly what the most asleop. Had he not heard hors of the Board of Trade--the|kist":
ho was tripping in his mixture of towards one another. It may at times is only equalled by From start to finish wo are in the familiar snore when stepping Archbishops of Canterbury, and
In addition to having a water- the tongue of Burns and the towell and truly said of them, they but thero, this is not a club cir-game for self; planting sud lightly just her bedroom, on to the Sponkers of the frish-House-
working and suffering for the way down from his dressing of Commons, from the first, down-pply second towns Tillicoultry gue that Shakespeare spako. "See are sportsmen.
dairymen
hero, Sandy, I want none of your congratulato
Thermal class was the backbone room half-ap-hour since?
Of course it was, Scot who good of the individual instead of themselves upon upholding, the philosophy of London life: tell of the club for several years, until That
the gonoral good. all the servants had retired he “Spokin' ay Chinese pur-rk," prestige of the place so far is theme of yourself. But he became expansion was necessaryand memprotested the other day against a felt sure, and, that half-an-hour interposed one of the Irish Speak-milk is concerned. The Doyon taciturn. "No," he said, "I want bors were willing to build larger winning boat because the owner or more ago.
fers, 1 have bere, Misther Pri-Valley Tribune," We don't to talk of London and the things and more son-worthy boats-not had put on board-us" ballast" gains another must lose. Thus it Who, then, could his visitor besidini, a specimon, ay the Ausronember having candour before,
that the Guel class were not sea- if you please a bulky member or comes that thero iso excess of ut this dead auf hollow hour of trading ref-hvor-rni. FIE- cane "I don't like suy now gown very
Ang I-kept silence as he went worthy, but that advancement two, when the rulos stated the material success in ono placó the night?
an' show, ut tu yor hanner.“
well," say the young lady," The on "The Groit Abbey was the should be inade for the benefit of number of men allowed on board. without a corresponding excess grim humour of failure in some other place, or All this, and a great deal more, The quaint phantasm of a material is nyfully pretty, mad the first place I went to; and when I the club. flashed through the brain of the obsolete office, holding auroliger style is all right, but it needs reached the Touts" Corner my
The impetus to this stride for about the situation when it was combination-of plicos;/ President of the Board of Trasie between his thumband forelager, something to improve the shape there? Have you noticed that by Dr. Heyward Hays, of Bang-as been hoard who quis ared to the greatest possiblo,num- Werens, if we planned and blood boiled. Have you been ward was given, unquestionably, narrated, and the individuals in this momentary interval be-advanced towards the President, of it"
namel, alid inany a cyclonic Inugle worked for the greatest possible tween the first protesting creak who, however, inable to stand the
whon "Why," suggested her dearest while Tom Campboll has a statuo, kok, some three yours ago,
ber, we would not only receive,. of the outer, and the noiseless strain any longer, dropped back friend, don't you let some other Burns and Septt have to be conto class, now called after the exchanged,
Bach his or her proportionate oponing of the inner, door of his into his very comfortable armchair girl wear it?
tout with lusts!!! Toubted medico, was built. Since that These, and a thousand bits of share of whatever profit resulted, study.
"Gang an' sec," he said. "The Line the club has still gone for- banter, make the CY.C.u gather but likewise over and above this Presidentsuf the Board of Trado
The Beginning and End have curious nations here of award-ambitious, and strong in ing place for sportsmen who are share of the best sort of profits, are not expected to bo as bravesident of the Board of Trade look-point in the entrancing landscape and yet," he went on, "we have tridd a dinghy class, but dise with the title.
It was remarked that the Prof Mother "It was at this scotan greation" herd-led: inuibers. The mombers built and really worthy of being honoured the sort Ut can noter condi as Homo Secretaries, Nevertheed uncommonly seedy whom he
from working for self,the, profit less, the President with whom this took his seat in the floo next that my daughter received a de-invaded England to some pur carded the beats as unsafe and Auy intos on the yachting of knowing that others have been story is concerned was not lacking day. Nevertheless, the loader of claration and accopled."
suitable for Hongkong waters.eason of the C. Y. C. would not helped and inade happier through in courage. lo sprang to his feet, | the Business Party rose to his feet
He rose, and on invisible bag the four ton cruisers which made not made of the motor boats of
The latostadditions to the fleet, Lo complete if recognition wore our own efforts.. and grasped the whisky decanterat question time and asked who
pipes, played imself round and their debut at the beginning of the club members. The motor cussing a dream to thus discourse firmly in his right hand, propared ther the President could now
And while it may seem like dis to sacrifice the contents if noud he inforarthe House" who constitut
that is all-thioro-wan
round-whuro-I-sat amazed-- Pritle of birth blazed from benchili his booxesllent boats in any weather, and a new hout, the Sonya, has fact romains that our social salva the season-havo been proved to section has done well this souson; upon so Utopian a prospect, the albeit mollow aid to years olded the Board of Trade?"
Her Socini Experience.-Mis-
shaggy brows. There was combining comfort and speed, the (warranted).
"Myself, his Grace the Arch-tress (to now maid)-"Wo are But when the first of his mid-bishop of Cuiterbury; and giving a largo party tomorrow Clouden in his notes; I saw in lutter item often boing overlook been added to this feet, afination is folded in these five words,
molol than any of the previousThat ye love one another.". night visitors entered the mumber of phantoms," replied the night, Mary. Have you had auchhi (not the war-worn trani od in a cruiter.
In) the heir of Bruce' and Wal-
ones. The loading spirits among and paced gravely towards him, President with a shudder, experience at parties?"
luce. Even in the Pacts' Corner dropped out of existence, as. O Messra. Ridio and Burn.
The old handicap class nearly the mutor: boat enthusiasts are the President replaced the whisky A murmur ran along the bon-
he had found, a racial injustico. fow of the "old brigado" remain decanter on the table with a shak- | chos. "Not well,”“ Breaking up,'
it was that the Saxon did not un- to toll the history of their fame of Next Saturday night it is hop-Southwark County Court, for it ing hand and sank back into his lun down," were some of the
derstand and the heather was on former yours. vory comfortable armchair with muttored observations,
ed to organise a smoking concert, is a most delightful relation- a gasp.
When did the Board lust incel,
season- is drawing and the following day-the clowship when master and servant In they stalked, one after and whore?" dominded another
At last he sat down and to a close and the Inomborsing cruise-thore will be soon treat ouch other with kindness," another, these midnight'visitors, | member of the Business.Party.
laughed. Passers-by turned and are to be congratulated in an array of prizes as has seldom You usk Mr. Redmond and. Bir. until the study was woll-nigh The President staggered to his
looked at him. His laugh om having decided on their club bean seen in longkong, thus Asquith if it isn't. packed. And strange figures fool again. they wore. Half of them wore "The Board of Trado-inot last priestly vestments, jewel-encrust || night—in my study," replied the ed mitros on hoad, pastoral crooks Tresident with obvious difficulty of gold in hand. The other half The next moment he was led into were wigged and round, silk- the lobby and dosed with stoakinged and knee-breeched. brandy." John Ball.
and fainted.
Friend-"And foll us the rest
of the romance,'
Fond Mother-Euforimately,
posa!".
“Only as a guest, ma'am.” Penniless."Miss Ella, was your bazaar asuеÇBнH?”
"Glorious! All the mon had to fire. walk liome!!!
WastedIt costs him to thousand dollars'a year to live."
"Why does he spend his money: foolishly 50
Tis Training My husband is just awful when ho wants to find anything. You never saw a man throw clothes around the way he doos.
5.
Tho
There
WAN
the laugh that is more infections of the last cruise. There is acuccoss and popularity.-
"Don't shrink from having a muster," said Judge Willis at
braced all humanity. It was house as the vote for the holding bearing testimony to the club's Celebrities anti Thoir Hobbies, than a plague. And yet I dared comidation and comfort at the So long as Dr. Clark, the com-I will pay whatever fine thoro not even smito: "Sandy," I said, olübhons, and the rocontacquire modore, is at the helm of affairs, is, but I will not, fo separated "what have you soen in Londonment of the site adjoining hos me and the vice," Mr. G.G. Wood from my dog."(Mrs. Patrick that makes you merryover your terially strengthened the capacity seconds him; the club must con- Campbell at the Fishguard **Bannockburn?"
of the place. In years to come tinue to prosper.
Customs.)