HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.
"How is it I didn't see you at the charity committee yesterday 1
"Probably because I took the col- lection."
Another new dress. Where ain I to get the money to pay for it
"I don't know. I'm wife,
not your financial a
Earnest New Student: "ExcusA m-could you tell me the way to the lecture hall 19
Old Hand: Fraid I enn't; I'm a student myself!"
Postal Clerk (trying to get de seription of the sender from the payes of a money order): "What's his Christian anme
"He hasn't got He's a Jew!"
n
Ripple: "I suppose you did quite a bit of reading while on you" Vacation !"
Ramble: "Well, I should say so Lots of signboards and Foad direc tions, you know,”
First Kid (at the zon): Do-no- ooh Lookit the rhinoceros:
Second Kid (whose dad took him to the auto show): That ain't no rhinoceros; that's a hippopotamus See, he ain't got no radiator rap.
An old bachelor who was quite ball fell in love with a pretty .widow, whose former husband's
tue was Robin. One afternoon the bachelor dropped in to have cup of tea with the widow, who, when ten was over, began to sing "Robin Adair."
The bachelor picked up his hat, "Madam," he said, "even if your hasband did have hair. it's no fault of mine that I haven't."
A rather unimportant-looking little man, holding an unlighted cigarette, accosted "a
when
"I am left-handed.” "Really-it doesn't show you have your hands in your poekets,"
A callow rhymester went to a wise man with the question: "What hook is most uwful to a poet.?''
"A book of stamps.'" "
"Papa, what are all these round things "
Those, my child. are what are known as the heat "circles"
Hrupecked Husband: "I wish they'd let me pilot one of those racing seaplanei.**
His Wife. "Don't he absurd. You'd kill yourself!"
"I know!
Three Welshan in an inn prais- ing a glass of beer-
First Man: "Best glass of heer
I never tasted to other!!
too."
Second Man: "So did I, neither."
Third Mau: "Neither did
I.
וי
Clerk of the Court (to prisoner); Is there anything you would like to say before his Lordship passe sentence
Golf Fiend: "Yes: if I'm going to be hanged, may have a trial wwing 1
The tram was already will filled when a very atout gentleman push-
THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS. WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 15,
SUBURBAN HEIGHTS--THE PICTURE HANGER
CALLITIO
BRINGS CHAIR TO STAND ON WHILE HANGING NEW PICTURE.
CHAIR SUDDENLY DISPLAYS TEND- ENCY TO WABBLE. ALMOST MAKING HIM LOSE HIS ́ BALANCE
GETS UP AND HOLDS PICTURE AT ABOUT THE PLACE HE WANTS ST TO HANG.
FIXES CHAIR AND CLIMBS UP TO FIND THAT IN THE EX- CITEMENT, HE "DROPPED THE
ARCHBISHOP ON
in and sat down, part of his ample proportions falling on a very thin gentleman on the right.
The latter glared at him. They SOCIAL PROGRESS. ought to charge by weight, in these cars. he said.
"In which case. was the genin! response, it wouldn't be Worth while stopping to pick you up."
::
A brass band once visited a small
NOT A MATTER OF WIRE LESS AND MOTOR-CARS.
well-dressed | village, and the people were de- FREEDOM AND FELLOWSHIP."
tc
man in the vestibule of a theatre and asked him for a match. The Han was annoyed, but began search his pockets in a bored way, and at length produced one.
"I don't want to take your last match," said, the little man, apolo- getically.
"Quite all right," replied the other; "I have a lighter."
199
[10
21
124
lighted with it, but they couldn't make heads or tail out of the trom- anne, so they seat old Cyrus Hay- wire to investigate.
I
Well, old Cyrus watched the per- formance of the tromisone player for some time. Then, he said, with a sneer: "Take no notice of him, fellers. There's a trick to it: he I don't swallow it every time."
CROSSWORD PUZZLE.
22
7 18 19 10
12
K
15 16
17
30
34
35
57
38
40
Horizontal.
1.--Point of union.
6-Shrub of rose family. 11.-One who gambles. 12. Flowerless plant. 14.---Wiles.
15.-To slip over. 17.Pronoun. 15.-Card game. 10.-Carpenter'a tool. 20.-Kind of knot. 2.-Printer's measure. 22.-Substantial.
23.-Inlet.
24.-Devilish.
26.-To cringe.
27.High cards.
28.-Part of chimney.
28.-King with golden touch.
31.-Spoke of alightingly.
24-Russian mountains.
35. To be skeptical of.
38. To act,
37.-Margin.
38. Irritate. 30.-Part of fish. 40.-While
41.-Gist 42.-Mexican coin. 43.-Representative. 45.-Publisher, 47-Mended shoe. 48.To mature.
1-A saint.
Vértical,
2.-Man's name.
3. Possessive.pronoun.
12
45 46
48
13.More moderu. 16-Non-clerical.
32 33
36
10.Window glass (plural). NO.-Arbor.
-Pertaining to the voice. 93.--To woo. 25.-Address to lady. 26.-Social organizations. 28. To confuse. 20.-Pertaining to a wall, 30.-Flowers.
21.----Anon.
32.-American inventor. 33.-Giver.
3.-Dessicated.
39-Sheep fold. 30-Celebration.." 41.-Chum.
42.--Mark on playing card. 44. To depart. 46.-Prefix: across..
This puzzle took 23 minutes to solve. See how long it will take you to solve it.
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.
No. 1542
POSED CLEAR DERIVERI
HUD
KINEE SEDORS
4.-Negative.
E
3PICED
HAD
5.-Screen,for vines.
ALEIAR22
6.-Unaceing..
7-To be borne.
8.-Frozen water,-
-Exclamation.
10. Tu také n
11. Done up in bundles.
By GLUYAS WILLIAMS
FINDS HE LEFT HANGER ON TABLE,
GETS IT BUT AB- SENTMINDEDLY LEAVES PICTURE ON FLOOR.CLIMBS DOWN....
GETS DOWN, RE- TRIEVES HANGER, CLIMBS UP ON CHAIR AND TRIES TO SLIP HANGER OVER MOLDING..
IS ABOUT TO HANG ..PKTURE WHEN WIFE
CALLS FROM DOORWAY) GET DOWN.HES SCRATCHING THE CHAIR. PICTURE REMAINS UNHUNG
Copyright, 1929, by The Ball Syndicate, Inc).
DOCTOR ATTÄCKS
SPIRITUALISM. -
SILENCE OF OTHER SIDE' ON SIGNIFICANT THINGS.
In the course of an attack on Spiritualism made in a lecture at the Conway, Hall, London, Dr. Addressing the York Rotary Club Bernard Hellander, the lecturer, What constitutes social pro- asked, "When a person is murder- gress?" last month, the Archbishoped, and the culprit cannot be found, of York (Dr. Temple) defined sociality does not the ghost of the progress as the development of to his mourning relatives?"
victim appear to give information
personality and freedom of persouni | Dr. Hollander is the well-known action in fellowship." In observa-physician for mental and nervous tians upon democracy Dr. Temple works on ineata and psychological diseases, and is the author of many said it was extremely difficult to do subjects. anything which did not excite some- body, however right, it might be to
THE
∙12-11
DAY OF RECKONING.
1930.
TO-DAY'S WIRELESS
PROGRAMME.
BROADCAST BY Z.BW..OX 935 METRES.
11 to 11.30 a.m.-Commercial news. 12.30 to 1.20 p.m.-Demonstration
programme.
145 p.m.-Weather report.
3 to 6 p.m.-Programme of Colum
bis records supplied by Messrs. Anderson,
Classe Noisette Suite, Overture:
Miniature and Classe Noi- sette Suite, March (Tschai- koweky), The B. B.C. Wireless Symphony Orchestra.
Classe Noisette" Suite (Tsechai- kowsky), (a) Danse De La Fee Dragee (1) Danse Doa Mirli- tons, and Classe Noisette Suite (Tschaikowsky). (a) Danse Chinoise (b) Danse B.B.C. Russe, Trepak, The Wireless Symphony Orchestra. The Gay Highway (E. Lockton and F. Drummond) and Ca the Road" (E. Longstaffe), Robert Enston.
Air on G. String" (Bach, arr.
Sear), and Funeral March of a Marionette" (Gounod, arr. Scar), J. H. Squire, Celeste Octet. "Peggy Aan" Vocal Genus and
The Girl Friend," Vocal Gems (L. Hart and R. Rodgers), Columbia Light Opern Co. Mercenary Mary," Selection (Meyer. Freidlander, Conrad and Caesar). The ** 1923 " Orchestra.
"I'm Perfectly Satisfied" (Leslie and Gilbert) and • Tell Me More About
Loved (Bert Page), Florence Oldham, "Martial Momente," March Med- ley (arr. Winter). The Regi- mental Band of H.3. Grean- dier Guards.
DISAPPOINTED DIRECTORS. to 7 p.m.-Chinese programme.
The directors of the Somerset Transportation Company in umfer ence assembled were very well pleased with themselves. They smoked big, black cigars and dream- Rolls Royces, and what not. ed languidly of winters in Florida,
most prosperous one. Revenues had The year just passed had been a been extremely gratifying They had kept down their investment by the purchase of low-priced equip ment, which they considered the dominant factor in their alleged all competition and securing busi success. They were underbidding ness in volume. Everything seemed serene. There wasn't a cloud on
the horizon. No reason why they plan a big expansion programme. shouldn't declare dividends and for another year would unquestion ally see their fleet of trucks. doubled or tripled...
Fraud and Imagination, Often spiritistic phenomena, he do it. The nineteenth century was said, had been traced to fraudulent prevailingly individualistic, and its practices, with the result that much
of the work done by psychical re gientest achievement Was Free search societies had to be devoir Trade. It was the sacrifice of rural to the exposure of possible con interest to the new urban interest.juring tricks. Even when the phe Nae the swing was towards central they were bound to rest on purely nomien were apparently genuine authority through the claim of personal belief and individual ex-fully Labour that in many respects inperience, and might be accounted dustry and commerce should be for on scientific principles, outside centrally controlled.
the domain of the supernatural- Social progress was almost the ndamely, by the working of the sub justment of "the muity of the whole conscious mind.
But lo! before the next year was well under way things began to ment, which had been so wonder happea. Their low-priced equip
#fficient the first twelve)
months commenced to falter and fall by the wayside, Missing motors, slipping clutches, broken axles, faulty brakes and other serious difficulties beset them. In fact, about everything that could possibly happen to tracks happened to theirs. The service on which they planned to build a gigantic enterprise, slumped badly and rev. enues decreased accordingly.
society and the "freedom of the "We may forget objecta and fartors within it. In practice so-events-that is to say, we may dis viety went forward by the swing of miss them from our consciousness, the pendulum with the emphasis but they are stored up in our sub- first home and then on the other consciousness to the end of our If both parties could be in power days. It is from this mysterious that the man of genius at the same time, they should get source
Besides endless repair bills and along on a straight course, but, as derives his brilliant thoughts, the annoying delays, they were forced it was. they altered so that each inventor and discoverer his guidefore the end of the year to re- prevented the other doing more une the post his inspiration, the than, an the whole. it wits good religious man his beliefs, and the cast. Cloue was their fine surplus place their entire fleet at no small they should do.
spirits get his supernatural pheno- of the year before. Gone were their The test of social progress was mena from the same source. always to be found in personal It is well known that the sub automobiles. They were forced to dreams of Florida and high-powered values. One would be led to sup-conscious mind has the peculiarity start all over again in the face of pase by some writers that social that it is very, susceptible to sug most discouraging handicaps. And progress consisted of the steam gestion, not only by the words ex- they never came through. engine, motor-cars, wireless, aero-pressed, but by the emotional atmes- planes, and so on.. They were good, phere crented. It is also well but were merely instruments.
known, or was at all events to the old mesmerists, that a person in state of hypnosis may read the thoughts of people present. Those who have witnessed experiments of thesis that minds in a atate, of sub- this kind explain them on the hypo- consciousness can communicate with each other.'
Radio Roading. He believed wireless on the whole was doing more good, than harm. He saw in wireless something which could be used, not merely for ainusement, but for the enrichment of human life, and the appreciation of good music among people who were not musical before greater. On the other hand, he had heard people who were former Jy readers say frankly that they had never read books since they had wireless. That was sheer disaster, heranse in reading they contributed their personality in the choice of what they should read.
WELA
The increase of-motor-cars tend
p.n.-Pregramme of Columbia records supplied by Messrs. Anderson. "The Student Prince, Serenade and The Student Prince." Drinking Song (D. Donnelly and S. Romberg), Allan Prior. Raymond Marlowe, Paul Cle- ton, Clat O'eon and Chorus. Hungarida Dance in D" (Brahms, arr. Robinson) and "Hungarian Dange in A Minor" (Brithms, are Robinson), J. H. Squire, Celeste Octet. **Ideal Homes" and "Hidden
Heroes" (Clarkson Rose), Nor man Long. No. No, Nanette." Vocal. Gems (Harbach, Caesar. Sear and Younians), Columbia Vocal Gena Chorus.
9.30
P.The.Hong Kong Derby," a short tak by Mr. Frank Hayter on the forth- coming local Derby.
Gramophone programme con- tinued.
The Song is Ended" (Irving Berlin) and My Blue Heaven" (Whiting and Donaldeon), Lay: ton and Johnstone.
Manole," Waitz (Waldtenfel) and
Eria-Selection of Irish Airs": (Mareston). Ticeprded at the National Union of School Orchestras,
"Waltz Medley" (arr. Debrov
Wembley Military Tattoo,"
Somers). Debrey Somers Band. The
Q
H.M. Grenadier.
Band Guarde. 14.30 pm.-Clige down.
UNHAPPY PRISONERS OF THE FASCISTS.
(Continued from Page 1.)
Terrible Railway Journey. All this actually happened, says the Federal Magazine. The real
The railway journey to prison was cause of failure was the selection of the political prisoner. Chained and one of the hardest experiences of equipment inadequate for their ser-handcuffed, they travelled in special vice. They made the serious error waggons divided into ting cells, of failing to figure on a speedy se- placement.
without light or air. The professor
far less important than the salee-great, and as prisoners are taken by eaid he was handcuffed for 150 MORAL: Original investment is hours. The distances in Italy are tion of equipment which will return the purchaser one hundred cents
stages, speading intervals at vari on the dollar in length of service would usually take 24 hours often ous prisons en route, a journey that Speaking of "deviation," the mak-life and dependable, low-cost per takes a political prisoner from ing of a piano or other object float formance. in the air, or the playing of musical
fifteen to forty days. Sometimes instruments by invisible hands, Dr.
prisoners were allowed to travel Hollander said:
handcuffed by, faster traine, but it SIDECARS STILL POPULAR.was very expensive, for they had to pay the fares for themselves and for their guards,
Feats of Lavitation,
*
"Allowing that there may be a still unknown dynamic force' some. where that is capable of moving punderable objects without physical contact, the presence of a force
soners, according to Professor Ros- Nearly a thousand political pri- selli, are now living on the islands of deportation. Life has become harder on the islands since Profes- militia who guard the political de- sor Rosselli's escape. The Fascist
said, and horrible scenes occur in portees use their bludgeons, he
its enforced idleness. worst feature of the island life is
The depor tees receive 2a, 'a day, so it is very difficult to support wives and child- ren, but their friends dare not send them help. If they did they would he denounced to the special tri- bunal.
Quite definitely, on the evidence available at Olympia, the big side- car outht is holding its own in the ed not to unite people, but rather capable of producing abnormal phy-estimation of the family, man," anys to separate them. They got a sun-sical effects is no evidence of sur dering of personal relationship by vival after death, still less of the There is a proverb to the effect contributor to Motor Cycling. reason of casy movements. People presence of spirits. We can pro that if one throws enough mud of one type tended, to associate duce similar effects on hypnotised some of it is bound to stick, and more together, and they developed subjects: They can see floating ob- the truth of the aaying is evident that evil thing class consciousness.jects, if suggested to them; only in this ense; so much abuse has the secret cells. But perhaps the
These inventions were really neu- the operator and those present who been levelled at the sideear that tral as regards progress. He had keep a conscious critical mind will many of its advocates even have not the least doubt that they could be aware of the hallucination." all be used for good, but they had "We have not received," he fighting for a lost cause.
acquired the feeling that they are been coming at such a rate that it concluded, "a single message which Olympia proved, once again, that But had been impossible for the people would throw light on any of the the combination is very much to to adjust themselves at once.
great problems which affect hu- the fore." Progress was the maintenance of manity so deeply, not one message the widest possible fellowship be- that is lofety or holy. If spirits tween the greatest number of dif-have nothing to tell us that is of férent sorts of people, so that in comfort or enlightenment to us, all the richness and variety of the except that they are perfectly happy those whom they have left behind life of the community there might in the other world, and that it is be a sense that they belonged to much the same as this one, suspicion ench other, that there was a sense is justified that these messages arise in which they all sharod, and that in the brains of those who attend DACANG İZİNGSHANEL NU
good for them at all.
(Continued at foot of next column).
"If spirits there are, if they love
them, if there is any love for humanity in the other world, then their manifestations should not re- quire the intervention of uneducat
prolestroller intcium mid the commonplace interpretations."
In conclusion Professor Rosselli spoke of the tremendous change that had taken place in Italian opinion with regard to Mussolini after the murder of Mateotti. "The day, when we reverse the Fascist regime """ he said. "it will be.. name of Batcotti. That is MU880- lini's nightmare **
QUEEN'S
WILLIAM
FO
#
ALL TALKING
MOVIETONE
DRAMA
Pleasure Crazed
THE PICTURE OF THE FUTURE
METROTONE NEWS
SHOWS YOU OPENING GAME OF ICE HOOKEY SEASON, TOM- MY ATKINS SINGING, BUDDIST MONKS AT PRAYER, A CORNER OF SPAIN IN NY.
WALT ROESNER
CAPITOLIANS
AND
HIS
GIVE
SYNCOPATED JAZZ!
BAKSMANN and VOROBIEVA DARE-DEVIL ACROBATIO
DANCERS.
GEORGE DEWY WASHINGTON
BINGS
"CHLOE" AND "A MELODY OUT OF THE
SKY
FINAL SHOWINGS TO-DAY
AT
2.80, 5.10. 7.15 & 9.20.
WORLD
DARING 1 DAZZLING !
REVENGE
PRIMITIVE PASSIONS! BARBARIC BEAUTY!
WEDNESDAY & THURSDAY Az 2.30, 5.15, 7.15 & 9.20.
STAR
The VEILED WOMAN
NIGHT LIFE OF PARIS
AT 6.30 & 9.20.