EM
HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN.
She: When are you going to buy some new shirts, dear
He: Why, I have more than plenty now,
She: "I know, dear, but I'm running short of pins."
Teacher: Napoleon once said there was no such word as 'can't.". Voice from the back of the class Please, miss, I wonder what he would have said if he had tried to strike a match on a piece of soap t
a news-
The Managing Editor: You sayf you've never worked on paper? What do you think you! can do for us?'
Miss Flapper: Why. I heard you needed sonteone to take charge of the makeup.".
3ale Vistor (chatting to oldest inhabitant): That's all very well, .but haven't you ever done anything
of any consequence ?”
Female Ditto: George, didn't you hear him say he'd lived in this village all his "life".
Nurse," said the Boston mother to her governess, "little Waldo seems disturbed. Please don's tell him any more hobgoblin stories."
"I didn't, madam. I just men tjoned that Bacon may have writ ten some of Shakespear's plays."
I never quite know how much money I ought to send any boys st boarding school."
|·
THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 3, 1929.
Hostess: Why is the plum pud. ding so long in making an appear- ance, Mary
Mary: Well, muin, we couldn't ger it alight with the brandy. But it's all right now, mu
We've put a drop of petrul over it.
TA
Tabby Hung it, dinner not ready yet I shall go out to a TO
sturant."
Wifey:Can't you wait ten minates
Hubby Will it be ready then ?” Wifey:No, but I be ready to come with you'
"There ought to be only one head to every family," "declared a man at the club.
little That's true,' agreed o chap, making figures on a piece of paper.
You agree, do you !! asked the first man, with a smile.
Indeed I do. I've just paid for hats for nine daughters!"
The small car had balked again, and while one climbed under it to work, the other ant, and chatted. "You know, I don't think 44 hours such a short week. Look at the American auto factory, where they only work 38.
"Yes," said the mechanic with a grunt, but I think they might put in another 10 tightening up the nuts."
Little Marjory had never seen her Aunt Jemina, and was delight-
"Well, I always keep my boyed when she heard she was coming very short of money now. I find he writes home nure often, and much more charming letters."
"Only yesterday," said Jones, who was discussing philanthropy, I refused a woman a small aun of money, and in eonsequence passed a sleepless night. The tone of her reproachful voice never left me for a moment."
Dear me, indeed a kind heart! Who was the woman
"My wife."
|
on a visit. On the day when the aunt was expected, however, a telegram was delivered at Mar. jory's home which read: Missed train. Will start at same time to-morrow" When her mother read out the telegram, Marjory burst into tears. Why, darling" cried the mother, anxiously.
what in
the world is the matter "Oh," replied the child, between her sols, Auntie says she will start the same time to-morrow, and if she does she will dose her train again. won't she?!
CROSSWORD PUZZLE.
16
10
12
13
ค
15
121 22
18 19
NIG
28
132
36
40
2
24
25 26 27
29
30
131
1339 134
35
136 179039
141
142
43
56
154
56.
159
47 49 149
154
57
44
$70450
Horizontal
1-Dance alep. 4-Man's name.
9. Part of body.
12.--German for one.
58
13.--Musical instruments. 14.--Before.
15. Fuss.
10.-Group taken as ona. 17.-Period of time.. 16.-American buffalo.
20.-Negative.... 21-Exclamation.
23. To annoy.
24. Cone-like.
28.-Insane.
30-Sound of hissing.
32,-To border on.
34.-Not in.
35.-Italian rain.
36-Easy jobs.
39.-504.
40.-Cuides.
41.-Poetic for over.
43.-Prefix: down.
44-Possessive pronoun,
45-Pertaining to "moon.
47.-Osculation.
50.-Noise.
51.-To imitate.
34. To annoy.
55.-Name.
58.Wooden pin. 37.-Napoleonic general.
38. Follows commands.
30.A number,
52 53
17-Pertaining to sound.
10.-Four.
20.-Nothing.
21-To gather together.
pa.-Usage.
24.-Sadly.
95.-Girl's name.
26,--Pungent. 27-To go. 29.-Sand hill. 31.-Prickly flower head. 33.-Abounds. 37.To weep. 33.-Perceives. 42.-Symbol for radium: 45.-A musical instrument. 48. Entranced. 47.--Relatives. 48.-Anger. 49.-Firmament. 50.-White. lie. 62.Church seat. 53.-Self. 55.-Toward
This puzzle took 22 minutes to See how long it will take solve. you to solve it.
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.
No.1455
FELBE MA
FOOKERKZA
201
Vertical.
1.—Smali, vegetable.
2. To assist.
High batter."
4.-Awakens. 5--Offensive in character.
0-Cut of meat.
7. To permit.
8.-Bone.
9.-Shelter.
10.To mistake. 11.-Jewel.
מ2018
BOTE
GAUD LOVE: FITZED LOBB VIK BAIE 12801FGB. LEO MIAGABBRIBE TO POLANDTM 880089 88423 PRIDE
SNAPSHOTS OF A BABY WONDERING WHAT HE WANTS
BƑ GLUYAS WILLIAMS
GUYAS WILLIANTS
KNOWS HE WANTS SOMETHING BUT DOES HYT QUITE KNOW
WHAT
TRISS SIXCHING HIS THUNG
NA, THAT DOESN'T SEEN TO
2:1
RENEE ADOREE in "TIDE OF EMPIRE”
MAYBE IT'S THE RYBBONS ON HIS JACKETY PUTS THEN IN MOUTH
NO, THEY DON'T SANSİY
EITHER
TRIES SUCKING AN OLD
SPOOL
AT
THE.
DISCARDS SPOOL IN FAVOR OF SUCKS HANDLE OF RAȚILE.
NOTHING WORKS ONE OF HIS COLORED BLOCKS
9-7 (Copyright, 1979, by The Bell Syndicate, Inc.)
SPORT
RAILWAY ATHLETES.
There was some good sport and close frishes at Wolverton when the annual championships of the Rail- ways Athletic Association were de cided. A. I. Mnggridge (Southern Railway), the holder, was beaten T. Entwistin (L.M.S., Earles- town) by only halt a yard in the mile rare, and there was a magni- ficent race in the half-mile cham pionship, in which A. Rose Taylor (London Midland) defented E. Hale, the Irish champion, by in ches, with S. E. Binfield (G.W.R.) the halder, another hall yard away, thir.
Inches only separated the first two in the 100 yards, L. D. Cullen, the Irish international, winning from J. H. Hambridge (L.M.S., Derby) in 10 3-5eucs., the runners being hampered by a gasty wind down the straight. W. H. Rees (Newport), holder of the 100 and 200 yards championships, was non-starter in both events.
疝
AND
"BUT AH, MOTHER JUST CAME
IN. THIS IS WHAT HE
WANTED
ATHLETICS..
UNUSUAL INCIDENTS ON THE ; REFUSAL TO BOX ON SUNDAY.
LINKS,
Jack Hood, the Birmingham boxer, who is British welter-weight champion and holder of the Lons- dale belt, has declined to fight on a Sunday, although Sunday w.boxing is very popular in the mid- lands, and he would have made more money, hy so doing.
i
An unusual incident occurred at Hadley Wood Golf Club when, dur- ing a four-ball match in which G. w. Cranfield (scratch) and Adamson (7) opposed H. F. Daw (D) and W. Williams (19), the third
"My decision," he said, "must not be taken as an indication that held, measuring 15 yards, was halved in two. Cranfield almost disapprove of Sunday boxing. On the contrary. I attend and en- holed his tee shot, being only four joy the boxing at West Bromwich inches from the pin, while his part, most Sundays. There is a ver ner's ball rolled into a bunkertain lique, however, bitterly on posed to this form of Sunday sport. guarding the green.
If I had agreed to box on Sunday these people would have seized the opportunity to renew their pro- tests, and Sunday boxing might have suffered in consequence."
Daw's finished four yards from the pin and Williams was just short of the bucker. All four players holed their second, shots, a feat without precedent on this course. The result of the match was a vic- One of the best performances was tory for Cranfield and Adamson, accomplished by T. W. Richardson wha beut Daw and Williams by two (Londen Midland), who won the
1 two miles walking championship in G. D. Ioberts won the thirty-six 15mins 14 4-5secs, and beat the holes open competition for the Lord.} Railways record for this event by Warden Challenge Cup at Rye. Tsecs. Miss M, Wannop (G.W,K»).¦ Roberts, who is a member of the retained her title, in the 100 yards. home rlub, bad successive rounds women's championship.
of 75 and 77 for a total of 152 Lo win by three strokes from W. Lister Hartley, the English internation alist, who had rounds of 78 and 77.
TORQUAY UNITED APPEAL Torquay United's directors re port net loss on last season of £010. The gate receipt at home gumes totalled £7,314. In the an nual report, the chairman, Mr. C. W. Hore, inakes a special appeal for increased support, expressing the belief that there is a promis- ing future for the club.
I
up.
HAMPTON REGATTA. The Hurst Park Cup for single sculls at the Hampton Regatta was won by E. O. H. Thompson (Staines), who with D. J. Car- tledge, won the Foster Knowles Cup for double sculls
j
Hood added that the Boxing Board of Control are about to open up negotiations for a contest for the world's welter-weight champion. ship between himself and Jackic Fields, of America.
OUP FINAL LAWSUIT,
The Hertha Football Club of Berlin, which was recently beaten in the German cup final by the Fuerth Club of Nuremberg, has filed suits against Dr. Bauwens, the referee. and two of the players. The referee is accused of unfair- ness, the two players of assault.
Evidence will be brought to show that one of the Hertha players had in consequence of rough treatment by his two opponents to go to tos- pital, where he still lies disabled. Damages will be claimed for him and for the club. Both clubs are
amateur.
THE WOMAN'S CORNER.
WOMEN AND MONEY.
AS MUCH CAPABILITY AS MEN 7
[DY JANE ENGLAND.]
The question of the fitures of women for finance has become acute in America!" This met my eye in the newspaper at breakfast time; and, reading to discover the reason why this audden momentous ques tion had become scute, I found it
was because one woulin in America had failed as a stockbroker and had been committed 'for larceny.
When a man fails on the Stuck Exchange or embezzles, nobody na men are not fitted for finonce. Tel surely if all women are to be indicted for and woman, all men should be indicted for one 'man.
The world seems to be in a state
The days are gone wher, a woman was not allowed to possess any money, when she hd to coax and wheedle for money.
In those days there was a great deal about the finance of the home that did not enhance a wife's self- respect, or lead to a keen sense of honour in money matters. Who would not wangle the weekly budget if it was the only way to
*
ui perpetual astonishment and in- get the extra pair of stockings; that terest about my sex, always as if badly needed new handkerchiefs? we were one indivisible and solid body and not individuals at all.
There is continual discussion about women. Should they play games, smoke, drink cocktails, and attempt to use their brains?
And above all-the loudest and most poignant query-are fitted either to possess or deal in any way with money!
women
a
"
ADDED ATTRACTION
“THE HEART OF GENERAL ROBERT E. LEE” in TECHNICOLOUR.
AT THE
QUEEN'S
TO-DAY TO SATURDAY At 2.30, 5.10, 7.159.20,
A SAILOR'S SWEETHEART
with LOUISE FAZENDA
TO-DAY TO SATURDAY
At 5.30 & 9.20,
CLARA BOW.
IN
THE ANCIENT MARINER
TO-DAY To
SATURDAY. Continuous Performance" From 1.15 to 11.15.
T
R
AT THE
BORLA
THE GREATEST BIRD ACT STAR THEATRE
OF THE CENTURY!
FORGAT'S ROOSTERS
A “TROUPE" OF 60 GAME FOWLS IN A BIOT OF COMEDY, AND ACROBAT OS ECCENTRICITIES
with
"COCO"
THE ONLY ROOSTER COMEDIAN IN THE OF THE HISTORY
STAGE
COMMENCING
TO-DAY
AT THE
STAR
At 5.30 & 9.20
PRICES: 5.80 p.m.-$1.00 & 60 cents 9.20 p.m.-$1.50 & 80 cents
CINEMA NEWS.
ROMANCE OF OLD CALI- FORNIA AT THE QUEEN'S.
-is no longer exclusively in ma.. culine hands... and it comes out into the open periodically, in generalisations, whenever a wo man makes a spectacular break
"Tide of Empire," which will about money; and immediately
be at the Queen's Theatre from to- sort of suat women become sally for the verbal missiles of all day to Saturday cells of the Cali the disgruntled members of the fornia "Argonauts" and their mad chase for gold in the Sierra other sex. ...
mountains during the forties" Just as there are dozens of wo- The drama opens with the Cali
who are quite incapable of formia of the Spanish dana, who running a house decently, so there lived in tranquil grandeur before are hundreds. who run their the discovery of gold. Then, John houses well. And just as there are Marshall discovers gold, and gold- many men totally incapable of an 'seeking hordes of barbarians pour aging the simplest financial matter, in.
men
inen
d
And
women
The pioneers were the vanguard
COMMENCING
THURSDAY, OCT. 10, 1929
EDGAR WARWICK
Presents the
WARWICK REVUE CO
IN REVIEWS OF THE REVUES
OPENING ON THURSDAY & FRIDAY OCT. 10th & 11th
WITH..
THE PEEP SHOW
IN INNUMERABLE PEEPS
SATURDAY & SUNDAY OCT. 12th 13th
66
'HIGH LIGHTS"
A FUN BURST,
BOOKING AF MOUTRIE'S AND THE STAR THEATRE
PRICES: $3, $2, $1... NIGHTLY at 8.15 pm.
POLICE RECREATION CLUB HAPPY VALLEY
AL FRESCO CONCERT
SATURDAY, OCT. 5th 8:30 P.M.
BAND OF THE K.0.8.B.'. By kind permission of the Officers of the Regiment.
LOCAL ARTISTS.
ADMISSION $1.00.
Trams and Bussos Pass tie Club.
[8451
Rence Adoree plays the Spanish Teachs Free Book
so there are many who are briliant about money...
of modern progress in the Weat But why generalise about it all? and out of their invasion came the Why not take it for granted that building of the railroads and the there are many kinds of women, rise of modern industrial towns just as there are many kinds of built on the ashes of the romantic men; and that as the world pro days of the dons. gresses both
heroine Josephita, and George change?
Some worgen I know can eal- Duryea the Irish D'Arcy, and culate at lightning rate now much George Fawcett plays Don Jose, hali a erown will make at thirteen last of the old Spanish granders. to eight on a horse. a piece of paper and some hours' Miss Fazenda, starring with quiet thought, and then I should Clyde Cook, is now at the Star not get it right. But I know men Theatre in A Sailor's Sweet- like that too.
heart." Warner Bros. production Miss Because une woman is a bad pri- directed by Lloyd Bacon. vate secretary must we throw out Fazenda plays the part of a laye
I should need
At the Star."
brings a big stora direct to your Bone." Hundreds of Idead A Curtains, Nete, Window
·Fabrion; New Valises in Houss hold Lion. While to-day.
Furnish the PEACH Way-Drid from the Looma. 5. PEACH & SONS, LTD., 094, Tux Locxa,
NOTTINGHAM, ENGLAND. ❤
Brixton. A firo escape and a came into collision at
I should imagine that the be ghing of a clearer understanding between the two sexes began when women were allowed to call their
all the brilliant woman secretaries torn spinster who, upon falling heir tram-car money their own, and even to spend in London, and because one woman to a fortune, leaves the ladies' Gresiam Road, Brixton. The as- it if they wished.
makes a bud wife, ut men never boarding school where she had cape was wrenched from its carriage There is still a deep, almost murry! Let that figment of the been teaching, to hunt big game, and crashed into a garden wall, unconscious. resentment in some masculine imagination-"' women " any man being big game, accord-breaking down about 12ft. of brick-
Work.. ing to ter point of view, inen that the great power-moneyranish, and let reality flourish,