"HUMOUR: ANCIENT AND MODERN."
A girl was asked if she had pro- posed to any man during leap year.
No fear," she said. "I'm not fool enough to propose to any man who'd be fool enough to marry me. And it's no use proposing to the others."
4
A tourist had been shown round
a small Far Western towaship by
A man who wished to make con- versation at the dinner-table said to the woman at his side:-
"Do you know the story of the archeologist who found two skulis of Cleopatra. one of her when she wus girl and the other when she
was a middle-aged woman
No. Do tell it to me," she said:
"In 50 years do you suppose elec
Dunno. They'll have to look after their own generation."
two brothers who had built the entricity will be unde like it is now " tire place during the past ten years or su He was shown with pride the town hall, the free library, and numerous other buildings. Sented with his hosts at luncheon sub- sequently, he remarked:
By the way, I didn't notice the church. Where is that "
The brothers looked at each other for a moment, then one remarked
There you are, Abe! I've told you all along I was sure we had forgotten something!"
Finnegan runs his Irish hotel ou lines of his own. Usually the bells won't work. If you want to attract attention, you have to go out and throw your hat at them.
An English visitor, having at last secured a reply, asked for some
water.
There is no carafe in my room, he said: "no water bottle
"Well, now," commented Finne- and I always thought a girade was a bird.”
The tencher. WILS explainingsan, things to the boys in his class,
For instance, I want to intro. duce water into my house. I turn too. The pipes and taps are in order, but get no water. Can you tell me why?"
The detective put away his mag- nifying glass.
The culprit has left a number of clues," ́be declared, casting a He expected the children to see quick glance round the room, " and I'm certain the thief has short black that it was because he had not made a connection with the main in the hair, is five feet seven inches tall, street. The boys looked puzzled, smoked cigarettes, wore woollen They could not see why the water
socka, and drove here in a car. AD- should refuse to run into his pre-other thing" mises after such faultless plumbing. How wonderful!" interrupted Can no one tell me what I have the victim of the robbery. "Now, neglected ?" "the teacher repeated, was the culprit a man or The WO- looking at the wondering faces.
man 7" "I know," said one boy at last. "You don't pay up!".
Alife I hear Mrs. Clyde had a very costly set of covers made to protect all her furniture."
Virginia: Yes. the material was so lovely that she is now having A second set of cheaper, covers made to put over the first set, to protect them."
"What time is it, Maud? "hcom- ed her father about midnight from the top of the staris.
Fred's watch isn't going." "How about Fred ?"
At an undertakers' trade dinner.
one of the speakers was so bucked that he declared his willingness to bury his next client free of charge.. A loud report was heard, and it was found that an Aberdonian had shot himself!
43
It was then that the detective was hafted...
"Héy." said a man, coming into the repair yard. "any of you fel- lows lose a wrench ?"
"Yes," replied one of the mechan- ies. I did."
What's your name?' Mike Connars." "Well, the wrench belongs to Pat Pending. His name's on it.".
An American visiting England was being shown the sights of Lon- don by Erfend. The American eyed Bush House approvingly.
Say, what's this dump?" he
asked.
"Are they exclusive ??? "Exclusive-why,
their. finger-bowl water comes 'in eans."!
THE HONG KONG DAILY PRESS, TUESDAY, JULY 23, 1929.
SNAPSHOTS OF A BOY LEAVING FOR CAMP
ARRIVES WITH MOTHER AT MEETING PLACE. WAITS WHILE MOTHER GOES OVER TO TALK WITH COUNCILOR.
CHECKS SENTIMENT, PULLS CAP OVER ONE EYE AND TRIES TO APPEAR HARD-BOILED
By GLUYAS WILLIAMS
LOOKS OVER THE REST WISHES MOTHER WOULD
OF THE BOYS
HERE COMES MOTHER TO SAY GOOD-BYE.
WISHES THIS LUMP WOULD GET OUT OF HIS THROAT
(Copyright, 1929, by The Ball Syndicate. Toe)
SPORT AND
PERFECT GENTLEMEN, -
BUT ——,"
"British Association football de feats in Austria, and possibly else where, are due to the English con servative old-fashioned, machine like safety first' and unimaginative methods which the Austrians use caly as a basis for the game, not the whole game."
"I don't know exactly," said the This scathing comment on the poor Londoner. Edgar Wallace's office, showing made by First League perhaps."
football teams on the Continent, with special reference to the defeat of Newcastle United by 8 goals to made at the at Vienna, was even
Austrian Football Association's headquarters in Vienna by Herr Alexander Neumann, president and cofounder of the first Vienna Football Association, and
Herr Dionys Schoenecker, the manager of the Bapid Club.
CROSSWORD PUZZLE.
16
19
29 29
22
33
38
39 140
41
42
146 147.
Horizontal.
1.To leave out.
B.To mature.
8. South American country.
12. A flower.
13.-Convulsive sigh.
14.--Eras.
15.-Lines up.
17.-Go away! 10. To rent.
20.--Invasions.
21-Long Sah (plural)
93.-Weight measures.
21.-Everyone..
26,--Adores. 28.-Upper part. 31.-Plural of "I'
32. To be ill
33-To perform. 34.-Conducted. 38-Enchantment. 39-To fondle.
39.-To follow order.
41.--Grain storage place..
43.-Arctic.
45-Markets.
48.Associates.
50.-Facing of fireplace.
51.---Actual.
62-Garden tool.
54.--Terrible.
55.-Jutting rocks.
30.-Sea eagle.
57.-Powdered rock.
Vertical.
J.-Pertaining to mouth. 2.-Greater in amount.
3-Jewish people collectively. 4.-To plague. 8.-Donkey.
To depart: 7.-To recede. 8.-Heathen.
10-To tear. 11.-Customs.
150
154
G
18.-To holler.
18.-"Love god. 22.-Lathery. 23.-Relates..
4.Boring tool. 25.-Shelter.
37. To compete.
29.-Poem.
30.Kitchen vessel.
36.-Monetary standard.
36.--Withered.
37.-Kind of bean.
38.-Heroine of Merchant of
Venice.
40.- Dips out 42.-Disembarks.
43. To separate. 44.-Prefix: vil. 40.-Gull-like bird. 47.-Eskimo vehicle. 48.-Feminine pronoun. 50.-Humans. 83-Conjunction.
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION.
30.1497 REG XA BEARED ZUBBED 1292 01Z ILEE UP. THOD? 21— 12 3KEEKND
EL
The Austrians," added Herren Neumann and Schoenecker, “are
COME BACK. HOPES SHE ISN'T TALKING
· DIET AND BED-TIMES AND WET FEST TO COUNCILDPU
SAYS: 600DBYE VERY CASUALLY. IT'S TIME SHE REALIZED HE BNT A KID ANY MORE. STRIDES HURRIEDLY TOWARD TRAIN-
HAS SUDDEN SINKING FEELIKS, HE'S GOING TO MISS HIS MOTHER PRETTY BADLY
SOPS "SUDDENLY AT GATE, TURNS AND WAVES TO HER? A LITTLE WISTFULLY
ALTYDA
·6-27 WILLIAER!
ATHLETICS.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS.
The British Boxing Board of Control has addressed the following letter to all the Federations of the world in relation to World's Cham- pionships:
It has been announced in the Press in England that the Ameri- can authorities have sanctioned a contest between Al Brown (Ameri- | ca) and Vidal Gregorio (Spain) as for the Bantamweight Champion- ship of the World.
KENT HONOVES,
Holders of Kent county athletic championships who defended their titles at Chatham found the opposi- tion particularly strong, H. flyde, the discus champion, improved his winning distance of last year by more than three feet, yet he was beaten by ten feet, W. Hertzog (Guy's Hospital) winning with
192ft, ein.
Hertzog retained his long jump. title with 21ft. 31ins, G. L. Rampl- ing put up new figures of 2mins. 12-58ecs, in the half-mile, while J. E. Bancalare equalled the Kent pole jump record by winning at
This has not been officially report- ed to the British Boxing Banrd of Control, and the officials here are very doubtful that official recogni- | 9ft. tion has been given by the Ameri- can authorities to this contest,
For some time many interested parties in England have endeavour- ed to proclaim Teddy Baldock (England) as the Bantamweight Champion of the World, but before quicker than the British players the British Control would officially and do not hesitate to take indivi- recognize the same, they wished the deal responsibility and take the
position properly settled in a sport- ball down the field instead of resort.ing-like matner The New York ing to short passes between the
team,
The British are perfect gentle men, but play, as if their primary reason was to earn a day's wage, instead of putting their hearts into the game, whereas the Austrians, though having reached profession alism from the amateur ranks, have yet retained their amateur enthusi-
authorities were therefore asked by the British Control to nominate the Bantamweight Champion of America, so that Baldock should meet their nomination, to officially settle his claim.
Directly it was unofficially beard that a match for the Bantamweight Championship of the World was taking place in America, a protest (Continued on next Column.)
was lodged from the British Con trol
As these differences have been go ing on for some years, and are. likely to continue, we think it time that a universal body should be formed with the one object of re gulating world's championships.
We feel sure a scheme could be devised whereby boxers of all na tionalities would have an equal op portunity of boxing for world's championships. It only means every controlling authority giving support to such a scheme to make it an absolute success, and success would result in a great revival of the sport of boxing throughout the world.
Your views on this subject are cordially invited.
THE WOMAN'S CORNER.
STUDY YOUR CHILDREN'S
DIET...
The feeding of children after early infancy is often a problem to mothers.
When solid food is necessary to take the place of the milk diet that has satisfied so far, how is one to know that a child is getting all the food value required to build up the quickly developing body 1
It is often at this stage that à fall- ing off in baby's development is noticed; digestive disorders hitherto unknown cause anxiety, and skin blemishes appear with alarming fre- quency.
Don't Experiment. Faulty diet is usually at the roof of the trouble,
As soon as baby can take solid
FLEECER GHADEE-food, too often the nursery meals are i
870020 SEBECO ON PZNOORBE HE ▲ SZABB EE- OGEE BRZ DISE BILETAT DE HUB-LD OLLEE
cost of their child's health, until a suitable diet is hit on by accident.
They say they have no use for theories. And if you mention such things as carbohydrates, proteins and vitamins they are either scared to death, or very sceptical.
It is just as easy to arrange well- balanced, menis as to trust to luck. The essential things for the proper development and nourishment of the human body are fats, carbo- hydrates, mineral salts, vitamins, and water. Meals 'should contain a certain amount of these every day. Without going into elaborate food charts a mother can make sure that her family is getting the proper lood: constituents if she remembers that
Proteins are found in meat, cheese, yolk of eggs, fish, pulsei food (dried peas, beaas, lentils, macaroni).
Fats are contained in butter, cream, egg, suet and dripping.
Carbo-hydrates are in porridge, bread, milk puddings, sugar, jam, marmalade, golden syrup."
Vitamins and minerals salt arë in green vegetables and fresh fruit.
Here are a few suggestions for | child's diet from eighteen mouths to school age.
SERAKFAST.
Bread and milk, oatmeal por ridge, eggs poached or lightly boiled, wholemeal bread and butter or dripping, dates, oranges, apples, bananas, grapefruit,
cream cheese, honey, marmalade. Milk or milk and water to drink.
Sardines in oil can take the "place of herrings..
DINNEL
White" fish, chicken, mution, young rabbit, heart or liver lentils, (atewed, never fried), .butter or haricot beans, green
vegetables, potatoes (boiled),! young carrots, onions, salads, baked apples, stewed fruit, rice padding, suet pudding with jam or golden syrup, junket, custard, cornflour mould, aponge cake with", jam, fig or date pudding.
TEA.
WILLIAM
FOX
PRESENTS
TRUE HEAVEN
With GEORGE O'BRIEN LOIS MORAN
Story by CE.Montague,
JAMES TINLING production
AT THE
QUEEN'S
AN ABSORBING SPY
DRAMA IN WHICH
ROMANCE OUTWITS
THE GODS OF WAR:
TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
At 2.80, 5.10, 7.15 & 9.20.
THE story of a woman who played with fate! Two men loved her. Only one could have her. So they declared that one must die. A thrilling climax of a duel at dawn!.
BETTY COMPSON
THE BELLE OF BROADWAY
AT THE
WORLD
TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
At 5.15 & 8.00 Only.
2.80 & 7.15-Chinese Picture, The Invisible Bride."
REX BEACH'S NOVEL SENSATION
now a thrilling picture!
THE
AUCTION BLOCK
A STARTLING STORY OF MODERN MARRIAGE
AT THE
with
ELEANOR BOARDMAN
CHARLES "RAY, SALLY "O'NEIL"
STAR TO-DAY & TO-MORROW
At 5.30 & 9.20.
DIRECTORY
OF
THE FAR EAST
1929
Bread and butter, jam or honey. Classified List of Manufacturers
bome-inade scones or cakes, hard, sweet biscuts, an apple or dates, cress or tomato sandwiches (skin "the tomatoes),
Milk contains protein, fat sugar, vitamins and mineral salts. Therefore, it is the best possible
Golden ayrup instead of jam or food for children, but it should honey: Milk or milk and water, or, regarded as a food, not as & later, a dash of tea can be allowed
driak.
The drinking of milk as a thirst quencher often leads to stomach disorders in children,
Also, as most vitamins are des taken from the grown-ups menu troyed at boiling point, both eggs with such items as ment left out on and milk are best left uncooked,
contain a good amount of vitamins.
in the milk.
GOLD LACQUER CABINET.
The famous 83,000 cabinet by Beikei Kobayashi which has been for many years a feature of Komor's showroom, has also been sold to a private collector in Lon- Raz fruit and salads are the best,don Tha cabinet is distinguished "67""guid"
the obvious ground of indigestibility, though a lightly boiled egg will still But if nothing is added to take the place of meat, protein, a valuable food constituent, is missing.
dy
-- Mem Suggestions.
venicles for vitamins, and bboud be by very beautifu It is mothers experiment often at the included in a child's diet every day. lacquer.
and Merchants in Japan,
China, Straits, Etc.
Hong Kong Daily Press Office.