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Hongkong Daily Press
No. $2,091 四拾九零式萬弍第 日叁初月年日已
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But when she got there, she didn't half swear; she'd forgotten the
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Hongkong Daily Press
Swans
HONG KONG, SATURDAY, MAY 11, 1929. .喹拜被日登拾月伍年九廿百九仟管英
UNDER
CAD
THE
PUNKAH.
BY J. PENN.
A Chinese who was charged the The finding "of a mixed jury in a Almost every week now there is other day with shooting A
recent jaw case has caused a great some trouble about an expensive deal of criticism. One dear old picture, and the experts, who are. denied that he red at it. Prohlady of my acquaintance tells meso confident when all is quiet, have abiy the animal dashed forward at that she could have knitted a much [rarely anything valuable to say the hallet and impaled itself upon
bester verdies
when the authorship of a master, piece is called into question. How stream of lager heer flowed are we to be sure of our pictures i along the gutter n Queen's Road How am I to know that my copy the other day, when a truck drawn of a Rembrandt is really a genuite hy six coules collided with aire, copy of a Rembrandt, and not hydrant pedestal. Over one hun merely the original! dred battles were smashed. No. body was injured, but the feelings of several onlookers—including my- self-were burt,
A Chinese compradore in Kow leon boasts that he is the father of thirty-five children. It is rot kaown whether he will apply for admission to the League of Nations or just permit the Colonial Govern- ment to represent him for the time being.
+
According to an American paper a tornado which struck the town of Haileyville moved a residence oce hundred yards along the street without
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A certain judge threatened that he would turn the next person who laughed out of" Couft, whereupon the prisoner in the Jock had bye- pteries!
A clerk in the P.W.D. recently received from a "client" a form which was incomplete, Thereupon he sent it back with large crosses in red ink where it was recessary to be filled, with the words Please complete where marked in red ind."
i
Under a spreading chestnut tree
The blacksmith tukes his station. His brow is wet with honest sweat.
And not with perspiration,
And his views on the Derating Bill
Are published in the Nation,
Recent schoolboy bowlers: LXXX means love and kisses. Tint-contraction of it is.. fold for the pocket.
Handicap-Headgear that
modern fashions.
will
atute 10
who possess
Overbear Feminine disturbing the sleeping family. Surely the U.S.A will not let things rest at that! No doubt we shall shortly hear that a return tornado has been arranged to put the house hack again!
A Hong Kong tailor announces that he supplies distinctive cloth ing for men." And, a very neces- sary thing, too, in these days of sex equality.
-
Some few days later the follow- ing reply was received: Dear eir,I have no red ink.-Yours faithfully,
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Overheard on the Peak tram the other evening:-
Has your baby learnt to walk
In the..view of a contemporary.yet " "the restaurant exg in China is not. Heavens, no! Why, he is only to be trusted." Only a week ago just learning to drive the car." I wrote un mine, "Opened by mis- take and left without signing the chit.
I
---༥༣-
......
There was a stationary tram-car coming from the other direction," read a sentence in a news report in a contemporary.
Thistles do more damage than rats, declared the Montgomery shire Agricultural Executive Com- That's just the sort of thing wittce recently. Stung by this un- one would expect of a Tone Kung exiled-for attack on his national | tram-car, remarked George P. vegetable, a prominent member Bottlethwaite, with a sniff, whan I of the local Bur-r-r-ns Club writes drew his attention to the report. to say that, within his knowledge. more arable land has been" Inid to waste hy leeks than by any other noxious weed. A reply to this re-t tort from the St. David's "Society should make interesting reading.
Daphne is a darling,
Daphne is unique.
Daphne surely couldn't stand
A cave-man or a shek.
She wouldn't like the desert; she'd simply loathe, a den,
And shows that she is bored to
tears
By strong, silent men
Daphine's nose is ravishing, Daphne's eyes are blue, Daphne's captivating smile
Thrills you through and through. Silent men grow valuḥle,
Cavemen soft and bland, And she has the fiercest sheiks"
Feeding from her hand.
Still it's not the slightest se,
Really, for you see.
I belong to Daphne and
She belongs to me.
Sheiks may crime and sheiks may go
But she'll be always mine
For Daphne is my daughter, and
She's not yet mine!
ས-་
4 nice mudguards,
A wheel brakes,
1 sleek subbers.
When she shakes;
4. new pistons,
4 plugs, too,
4 wide doors
To enter through
4 bright headlights-
How they shine!
4 more pasmecta,
Then she's mine!
-~
Gorgeous-Those large appetites.
||
ল
||
There is a tortoise on Stone- tutters' Island who was a great favourite with Captain Cook 150 years ago. When asked to what he attributed his great age the ter toise said: "I have never smoked nor tasted alcohol. I take a cold hath every morning, and though I cannot get about us quickly as I used to, I go for a brisk walk every day. I think modern girl tortoises are too fast. In my day there was none of this craze for undignified rushing about."
What about the following, set to appropriate music by Prof. Mac Quaver, as Hong Kong g own anthem?
I.
The moon is up
On Peak's grim height; But tiny clouds
Have hid her light.
I cannot find
II.
My new felt hat. Perhaps I dropped it
On the mat... III.
But on the Peak
Beneath the moon,... Who needs a hat
Is just
coon. IV. Therefore I will
Not wear a hai, But go without;
And that is that!
Unfortunately she had been told that she could sing. So the first opportunity saw her in the studio The following little jingle was of a teacher, undergoing an audition inspired after George P. Bottle- before arranging to take lessons. thwaite had spent an evening out The professor sat down and played with a number of American friends soft accompaniment while the and written the next morning- ambitious young woman poured The meteors scrawl Bre schoolboys forth her choicest assortment of of a slate:
P
notes. The test. did not at very The landscape fades like butter on long. At its end the professor a plate; swing round on the music stool The sun comes up like ads on a and regarded the flushed performer movie screen. wrachfully. Madame," be cried. And sets like pennies in a gum
it is no good, no. Nefer haf 1 machine: heard such a voice, not 1 blay on Snakes go wriggling der white keys, I blay on der Black ground keys, but always you sing in der That hootch! It makes the world cracks
spin round!
Diary of Coming Events.
To-day.
(May 11.).
Shanghai Races, last day. St. Joseph's College Athletic Meeting, Sookunpoo,
Lawn Bowls:-Division I.: Kow. loon Docks . Taikov, Craigengower r. Civil Service, Kowloon Bowling Green Police, Kowloon C.C. Recreio. Division 11. Recreio H.K. Electric, Taikco, Kowloon C.C., Civil Service. Kowloon Bowling Green, Yacht Club 7. Craigengower. gower . M.B.K., H.K.C.C. z. Chinese R.C., South China w. In- dian R.O. "B" Division': Recreio v. Kowloon C.C., H.K.C.C. v. R.E. and R.S., M.B.K. v. Nippon Club, University v. Indian R.C, Chinese R.C. . South China. "Ć" Divi- sion: Recreio v. R.A.O.C., Civil Service . RE and R.S..
European Mails:- Inward; } Europe zid Siberia (Tamba Maru); Europe vid Siberia (Amur Maru). Outward: Europe rid Marseilles (Kalyan), 10.30 a.m.
Sunday. (May 12) Sunday after Ascension. Opening of S.C.A.A. Pavilion King's Park, 3 B.m..
Queen's Theatre: Slightly World Theatre:"The Thief of Bagdad." Prince."
Csed"
Tennis:A Division: Craigen- Star Theatre: "The Student
Concert: Wesleyan Sailors' and Soldiers' Home, Fraya East, 8 p.m.
Queen's Theatre: The Crowd."| World Theatre: The Thief of Bagdad."
Star Theatre: "The Student Princo,"
Ten Dances: H.K. Hotel, and Peninsula Hotel, 4.30 p.m.
Dinner Dance: Peninsula Hotel, 8.30 p.m.
Monday. (May 13)
Piano Recital: Mr. H. Ore's pupils, Cathedral Hall, 5.30 p.m.
Queen's Theatre: BEghtly Used." World Theatre: The Patey."
Tubsday. ,(May 14.)
on
the
Garrison Rifle Meeting, Kowloon" City Range, 9.15 nm.
China Sugar Refining Co., Ltd. (in Voluntary Liquidation) Extra- ordinary general meeting, Messrs. Jardine, Matheson & Co., Ltd., Board Room, noon.
Sanitary Board meeting, 4.15 pm,
Queen's Theatre: "No other Woman.""
.
World Theatre: The Patsz." At 9.30, and 7.15, Chinese Picture "Yang Kwei Foo."
Star Theatre: "The Danger
Girl
Tea Danoes: H.K. Hotel and Peninsula, Hotel, 4.30 p.m.
Dinner Dance: Peninsula Hotel, 8.30 p.m.
European Mails:-Out ward:
At 2.30, and 7:15, Chinese Picture Europe vid Marseilles (Hector);
Yang Kwei Foo."
4.30 p.m.; Europe via Vancouver, Star Theatre: "The Danger B.C., 5 pm; and, viá Siberia, Girl." .."
Tea Dances: H.K. Hotel and Peninsula Hotel, 4.30 p.m.
Dinner Dance: Peninsula Hotel, 9.30 p.m.
European
Mails Outward: Europe via Victoria, B.C., 5 p.m.; and vid fiberis, 5 p.m. (President Taft),
p.m. (Empress of Asia).
Weddesday,
(May 18.) Garrison Bife Meeting, Kowloon City Range, 9.30 a.m. Queen's Theatre: Woman."
"No Other
THE
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SHAMEEN
Guides
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and Special Care Täke of TOURISTS. Cable, Address: "VICTORIA."
FETACOMBE PRIVATE HOTEL OF LONDON, BUT NOT IN IT.
In Clear Fresh Air, by Heath and Park, Quásta are but 23 Minate from Classno-crons, j'NG leave the whhi and worry of Town behind, in comfortably surroundings with the ussal ameal- tion of a well-esadunted Home, Gas Fires, Constant Hut Water, and Quite Exceptional Cuisine, Ones having lived in BLACKHEATH, ORE never wishes again to reside in Busy Lossos,
24 GNS, F.W. INCLUSIVE PERMS AND NO YEN VURAN.
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HOTEL CONSTANCE, 1324, LANCASTER GATE, LONDON.
A Beautifully appointed Hotel for
*** 50 guests. Delightfully situated at a corner. facing South and South-West, in fall view of Hyde Park, bat standing auf. ficiently far back from the main road Within 3 to ensure perfect
quiet minutes walk of Tube Station, and atore's throw of buses to all parts. The spacious public rooms are ex quisitely furnished. All bed-rcoms have gas fire, and bedsiderending lamp. Running hand d water, already in many rooms, in being extended to all.
Electric lift. Night Porter. Thu cuisine will be found.
entirely Ratisfactory Single rooms from 3 to 6 gris, double from 7 to 12 gns, weekly, including fall board, attendance, buth, otc. Some rooms have Private bathroom.
Másäging DireRKET
**Your Eyes Aru Buên •With Ca►
N. LAZARUS, Hong Kong's Only European Optician (tabilabed Over Forty Yaam). Manager: - BALFU) A COOPER, 22.0
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Two London Hotels
Rembrandt
Rubens
៥
Thaar. Hetals are elbosted in the ssent desirable positions - ssey of access from all parts of Loodes. Under one management, ami highly recommended they offer the maximum ef furarians" reduement combined with the latest hotel improvements 12 very reasonable rates, Bedroom with Private Bathroom. All roote are beated and have hot and cold running werer, ele
HOTEL REMBRANDT, South Kensington, facing the Victoria and Albert Museum.
HOTEL RUBENS, Buckingham Palaco-cond, facing. Buckinghani Palace.
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