BY

THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, JUNE 17, 1961,

JACKY'S DIARYS

DIARY By Mendelson

"This week in School we learnt all About a Tuy called Julius Suigure,

age 33

This Here Seizure was the Emproar of Rome a cupple of years ago, of all the People Liked him Loto,

RAY

Exseft for a guy named Cashews, who was Nuts & wanted to Sassinate Him

(doo,

But an hour he didint Trust

Cashews; on a count of he useta, say El Bl WARE of

men

who

LEAN

ET TU BRUTE

after that they figured

FRIENS ROMANS

COUNTRY BOYS, LEND

& LOOK {HUNGRY")

So then this Soothsayer

| Came & tried to warn him]· about how they wanted to sassinate him, only hE. Wooden Listen."

SOOTH South.

SOOTH

After they did there was a Big War in which everybody got killed

TRAST and West have one of those holdings that delight rubber bridge players, but that cause duplicate players to tear their hair,

They can make all 13 'tricks at elther clubs, diamonds or no- trump and their non-vulnerable opponents have a nice save in spaces against anything except

even no-trump, '

The bidding started out the same way at Both tables with a no-trump by West; two spades by North; alx diamonds by Eant: and six spades by South.

At one table West looked at his two diamonds and put in a prompt <louble. Every one passed and North was set five irleks, for a 100 points 1568.

At the other table West was made of alerner stuff, Ha de-

NORTH

AKQJ1003

1

[Sure enuff, the Very Necks day Cashews & his band of contractors look Knifes & Stabbed Julius Seizure right in the forum.

TARGET

ELK

NAP

EIG

once only.

How many

words of four letters or more can

you

make

From the letters In the

Barn

on the lett ↑

11

making

the words. (2.00) letier may be used Each word must contain the large letter, and there mut be at least one tea-letter word in the list. Nu plurals; UF tureign words no proper TamarW. TODAY'S TARGET: 64 words, Wood: 72 words, very pout: 3 words, esvellent. Haluttua on Monday,

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION: Cement cent råte eineia emit enie rzrite EXCITEMENT est extent extinct item meet wett mint mite altt mitten next teeni ! tenel test test tlen tline tine trat

London Express Service.

TALKING

POINTS

There are no

GRR,

OUTS

4--23

PROGRESS

UTSIDE the Foreign Office, no one yet seems to have realised quite what the emer- gence of a crop of small independent African states has done to that urbane and (we hope)' resourceful fellow, the British diplomat.

In one sense, the creation of a new batch ambassadorial posts is exhilarating event

for the leering middle segment of the Foreign Service, where promotion is hungrily awaited.

During the post year, 14 in- farit countries have received British diplomatie representa lives for the first time.

ADMIRABLE

So thats when

he said the

Famous Saying:

which means you two BRUTES!!

2. THE BOWEN IN

they oughta Berry Him, ...So they Picked Mark anything who was Seizure's old & Crusted friend to makes as

ispelche

ME YOUR EARS

1961, King Textures Syndicats, Inc., World vigher terved.

The END

REPORT ON A BRAVE NEW TRIBE OF DIPLOMATS

It's a strain being

dignified when the

embassy is furnished

with whisky crates

upon a diplomat blissfully re-

They arc now almost presenting his country in the numérous enough to form a rue du Faubourg St Honore or miniature African tribe of Massachusetts Avenue. ambassadors,

first secretaries, countries

in the world less known by the British than these self- same British islands.

--BORROW.

~(London Expreks Søruler),

second secretaries. third secre- iaries, and their staffs.

There is something admirable

THOMPSON

CONG

AGAS

even eitt typists must be sent Our embassy, na Brozzaville, out from London) have borne, for example. is housed no longer ther novel hardships with in an old butcher's shop, with and brave about the desire for

But independence, gallant as Our man In-well, I am asked fortitude.

the Ambassador Extraordinary But promotion to a land few Independence." In such lands as

and Flenipotentiary sliting in say where, precisely- people have ever heard of, with Upper Volta (where Ouagadou- it is, has brought an Initial not to

In Lome, capital of Togoland, the 'cashier's glass kiosk. an unpronounceable capital city, Ecu the capital, is no larger but phase of overcrowdin, short was giving a formal dinner to

the charge d'affaires overesne a must sometimes seem

age, confusion and discomfort.

Elsewhere, houses and officea prickly much hofter than Margate), or

members of the local Cabinet ticklisht divation by constructing are being acquired, hotly fought garland indeed when it descend's Gabon (population 420,703).

recently. The electricity supply furniture for the embassy out of for in a booming seller'e market (a three-bedroom, rather 'rudi-

707th Heaven

FAMILY IN FLIGHT... You're coming with Mummy and me to visit your Granny, Daddy said. In a great big

Rolls-Royce 707. Sa.I told my school-friends. I'm going to

Fly Air-India (stuck-up shing! soil one ). I shall sit.

on a seat of purest gossámer, with milljons of jewels

all around me (you're ugly! said another) and be scryed

with big helpings of jelly on goki plates (piggy) said another).

And I shall be escorted on and off the plane like the

queen of all the world. And my luggage will be

carried by handsome princes (big, kendt shouted

་་

my best friend) I don't care. I shall fly like thi

AIR-INDIA

In association witti Bong and gANTAR

1

diplomat-pioneers assembled in. falled just as the guests arrived, whisky crates,

The other day a group our

London 10 discuss their prob lems and progress in their Arst few months.

This meant that the embarsy

their new countries with no moment

Many of them had arrived in home or office available, and With ferocious competition to every existing cranny of accóm- modation.

STILL MORE

In Conakry, capital of Guinea, mentory house at Bamako has was in darkness, and the new the diplomats but a swimming just been bought for £10,000). air-conditioning was out of pellon. By ill-luck, the prevail- pool for themselves et untold ing wind veered round at that penditure of tropical sweat

and began to blow In another capital, a diplomat horrifying odours from an open spent his evenings in a sleazy Of course; even modern re. drain through the dining-room hotel room, stark naked imper- sources bring problems. When windows,

turbably writing his despatches the electricity falls at GA CI- white cockroaches can over his bassy dinner party, the Am- fect.

bassador's look of distreso may not be merely because of his questa inconvenience.

QJ7

+82

600

WEST (D) EAST

4A07

& None

7

A353

+QJ

4KQ108

42

AX 100543

AJ72.

SOUTH

40342

K1000 +371 4543

East and West vulnerable (See article for bidding.)

Opening · lead-ę K

clied that seven diamonds might well makco end instead of doubling West passed and left the decision about seven to his Dariner.

East bid seven diamonds all right and when it got back to North he went to seven sondes. East doubled that and picked up 1100 and a net profit of 200 points, or five IMPs for his side, How could East and West have reached seven no-trump for the maximum? All East would have had to do would be

to

pass over North's Boven spades. In that caso West might have tried the no-trump grand slam. I say, might have fried because I rather feel that he would have settled for the sure proft and doubled.

NECARD 52rde♣♦

Q The biddlog has been:

North

East Douth Wert Double Redoublo 1 m

1

Pais

Prze 24

34

Pers

You, South, holdi

Pasy

Fus

Pars

6A87 ❤K354 494 49532

What do you do?

Am-Fais. As the song, myNI "You've gone aboué na far na

TODAY'S QUESTION The bidding has been: North

F1

Bealt

West

Double Redouble 1

You, South, hold:

SART WKQII SAS SISTE

What do you do?

Answer on Monday

CHESS

By LEONARD BARDEN

With the temperature alrendy And, all too often, the jungly more than 100, the wintlows ellmate readily explained to

Candies were

It was taken with calm when them the nickname of the were closed tight.

found, and boosted the tem- it was found that from Yaounde, armpit of Africa," which has perature even higher.

seat of government of Cameroun, He will probably also be been acquired by one of the new

cipher telegrams hid to be thinking of a whole deep-freeze- sovereign republics.

In that inferno, it is a relief transcribed tour timed by in- ful of food-slowly, biexorably to know, the best traditions of expert hands at "booster" going bad. The most prudent diplomatist diplomaty prevailed. The am- stations before reaching London, And If any diplomat in Paris could hardly preparo himself in bastador improvised etiquette and So arrived impenetrably or Rome is irked at having advance for this new life. He for the occasion, stripping him- garbled. (In any event, the con- missed the chance to show his might, perhaps, dutifully memo- self to the minimum and irmation copy by mall was pioneering hardihood, he should risé the words of the local pressing his quests to do the usually delivered firet.)

fake heart, national anthem. (Ono dificult same.

There is every chance that example begins: “Ry tanin-

And now, after all the tri- another half-dozen brand-new drazaray malala of")

There has perhaps never been bulations, the diplomatic fo is embassies, in brand-new African Black to more, 'Can

He a diplomalle dinner party con- gradually assuming. something countries. will have to be defend himself by either (a) ducked in like conditions of like a normal appearance in created in the next few years....Q-Q1 or (b)-1 ....... B-K47 semi-darkness and semi-nudity, these parts.

-(London Expresă Service).

A SHOCK

HARDSHIPS

But he could hardly arm him- self against the ways of the only plumber in one virgin capital in

For social strain it'oven out- West Africa who mixed up clamed that other recent em- wiring and water pipes so that barsy gathering at which the overyone pulling the plug in small talk was brought to a the embassy bathroom received en electric shock.

Any social event, it developed, can be treacherous ground in a technologically unsophisticated society.

shuddering halt when one dis- tinguished gust began to reminder about the time he ale his wife.

By all accounts the planeering diplomats and their staffy (for

Just Jones That

That la

A PYTHON found coiled naloop on steps to à baso-

909 call spat a police squad cor. to a 4`ft.)

ment flat In Seymour-atrcéf, Marylebone. Then R.S.P.CA Inspectors put it in a bag. "Baid ono! "It'h only a baby--the cold steps made it sleepy," "Police are seeking the owner.

GLE SEAMAN, PETER CLARKm, of the frigato Leopard, hax

ing A tkreip without a Vahter. Banan

ཚ།།་

London Exprekh Baralon.

HOW BRITAIN IS TACKLING HER SLUMS

SLUM CLEARANCE DRIVE

DEMOLISHED

CONDEMNED HOUSES

EACH YEAR

PEOPLE REHOUSED EACH YEAR.

1930-1905 (30,000)

(90) 1355 11.000

NOW: $1,000

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