LOGA
GO
The Gallery Game.
O
BEING ONE MORE
IN WHICH
THE DEALER WINS
HAVE been asked by readers of this column I
for advice on most things. There have been requests for information on how to keep bees, how to expedite a divorce, how to make wine in Sussex, how to become a Prime Minister, and a strip-teaser (separate inquiries).
THE CHINA MAIL, WEDNESDAY, MAY 24, 1961.
RLAY
army
"He was sleeping in telephono boxen when I come nero him. "You may have seen Jim wandering around King-rond. He's unmistakable, He usually walks around with his bent at the elbow und raised to shoulder level. Try It some time. It's by no means comfort. able. He does this to teach him- self how to forget the pains and demands of his body.
"He may be here any minute to demand more money. The trouble is, I don't think he trusts me. Every artist la convinced the dealer cheats him!
Doctor of
disaster
Cliff in
the corner
TEENAGERS' maga-
NOTICE that President Azine has been giving
what it
calls
Kennedy, in his most its readers recent speech about the Cliff Richard wall' panels. Cuban situation, refers to They can best be described as sheets of wallpaper (of hideous design) incorpora- ting photographs of
Richard.
Mr Castro.
At the same time, his UNO
representative, Adlal Stevenson, cult him in other speech, throughout Dr Castro.
two Cuban
Most of the Brilats he shown have been modernistic, abstract and petive. Including R German auto-destructor
who I Once Dsked attacket strips of nylon with officials what Castro was brushes dipped in altrie netd. But at the mament he has an doctor of. Their replies:- exhibition of Ruslan Icony, dating from the fteenth ren- tury and worth from £50 to
£500.
He said "I don't think there has been un exhibition of Its Kint in London gallery be fore. It's taken me mouths to
worth it.
collect 11751 Jaut It's beent
I, of Freedom,”
2. of Disaster."
Sadly and incredulously quote from the printed instruc- tlons:-
I
"Two panels on either wall at interest over your bet. Just think, Cu first thing in the morning and last thing at night. "With C behind your door, with probably have Jo employ bloodhounds to keep all the visitors away,
yuu
to Professor Niehaus, MEMO descendant of the Kaiser, and
"With cur in the corner, specialist at his Swiss clinic in dusting should be a pleasure... regenerative treatment for the aged. including Somerset IT WAS sald by Earl Fortescue
In the House of Lords, and It: "They have a strange beauty Mangham and Dr Adenauer:-
Faust be the most snobbish and power.
"They've given me something and spiritual like a relligious experience. Made me feel quite different. In a way I don't want to sell any."
If I had offered
him.
This week, though no one has asked, I propose to tell you how to become an art dealer. It's ne 1 might the kind of recondite advice that I don't think has ever been offered before to British newspaper readers.
The best way is to tell you how one man has done it site- cessfully.
Youngest
Hrs :: Mr Richard Temple, 23 he must be the and at youngest art dealer i Londons or any other rity where art dealers are permitted.
the grandson of Sir He Richard Temple, ex-Colonial administrator whose family line hns parallels with the Dukes of Buckingham. At 21, after dolug his National Service with the Blues, young Richard found himself, ke many young men
Next step was to find a place
to sell the prints.
He found a disused basement below + garage in Chelsea (where else?) hung up his 100 prils, and waited, in no timent
all the prints were all sold.
Now, several months later, he has moved to a small but plugh gallery in Knightsbridge where! his customers include diplomats with aesthetic leanings and rich Philistines who want something to cover that space on the wall.
Ancestral
Young Richard. who still
£200 fut have periunded
טן
ם
An ad. in a London magazine statement (putting it politely) offering "Professor_Niehans' of this week or any other!--, . cell therapy"
Bayswater "It is evident that crimes of clinic. It is next to an ad selling violence and sex' are rare among "Photo-nudes," and one seeking those who have had the advan- a public dance partners for a strip-tease fage of education ai club.
school-or perhaps 1 grammar school."
Do you approve, professor?
-London Express Servic#),
-
KING HUSSAIN
TO MARRY
"First it was a Yank, then it was Adam Falth, then it was mo, now you want to marry a king.”
The family crest
business
By
ROBERT MILLER
OT your family crest yet?
of similar background, with no wears his old school tie fin-UT It is now being more widely realised that
particular carcer in mind,
desire to lucubrate at univerity.
He discovered quite for tuitously, when browsing around the dealers and shops in end outside London that Howlandson prints which were being sold in Bond-treet for 210 (framed) could be bought in rural re- treats for 2s. 6d. (unframed).
Young Richard bought 100 at 2s. 6d. and hatt them framed.
He had taken the first step Into the pratical, fascinating, Polychromatie World of art dealing.
he evitab:v
went
la Stowe,
which was onett the ancestral possession of a coat-of-arms is not
is booming
the
the prerogative of home of the Dukes of Bucking-tifled folk, as must people used to assume. You may be ham; and who still looks like just an ordinary person und yet put in
undernourished subaltern, claim for a family crest.
an
has this to say:
"Apart from luck--and I've It helps, of course, if you con certainly had my share-an art prove descent from some fore-
dealer must have a sharp sense bear who was granted one, but
of business and, of course, a keen appreciation of art.
"One of the best painters I've tound is Bruce Proudfoot.
successful
According to a leading au-
ἐν
this is not essential. Every year, thority the official attitude is
that few people are likely scures of new crests are sanc-apply for a famlly crest unless
private tioned for use by
in- dividuals whose qualifications they are suitable to receive one. ure mainly that they would like
to put a coat-of-arins un their
"In my opinion he's not far short of beint a genius, but he's | notepaper, but who have no also not short of the eccentrict- ambitions for a title or such-like ties of gemus.
6
honour.
The man called
MON Randolph has now
completed
the
pious book
task of putting In form Sir Winston Chur- chill's post-war speeches,
The volume-"The Un- written Alliance"-inevit
element of ably carries an pathos.
The orulory which dazzled Britain for half a century is suli in full sunte eight years ago, gradually declining to a trickle. until it dries up altogether in October 1959.
Nowadays he attends the im portant debates, but opens not his mouth,
on
to
give
the roar'
BY WILLIAM BARKLEY
be man the singular instead ing Here he is reported in his 78th of the plural?" year making as Prime Minister
a venetrating study of defence Amid the heavier political problems. One recalls the great prononcements we find that dome of his brow furrowing st.gem delivered in the presence of one point, a portentous air of the Queen herself ai Si gravity enveloping him → and Stephen's Hall, putting much of this is why:-
the British Constitution in A "mut my warn the Houre few pointed words-- that um going to make an unusual departure.
I am golug
to make a Latin quotation. It not
Is one which I hope will offend the detachment of
The have old school tle and will not balle plan.
the now spelling brigade."
Good social standing
The people who are interest- ing themselves in heraldry lo- day are mostly those of good midle-class social standing. If you have had good education, are in the professional, manu- gerial. or executive class, and are ready to pay the necessary fee. Your chances of being granted coat-of-arms
0 good.
аго
The body responsible for Investigating your credentials and endorsing your applica- tion is the College of Arms. London.
with its 13 officers headed by the Duke of Nor- folk, Earl Marsbol of England. He acta for the Queen, the "Fount of alt Honours."
The Duke of Norfolk
But Elizabethan traders later idea. They Kot took up the
pur- crests not for military
trademarks and poses but as hallmarks. Many at this For nearly 500 years the
today ori- Herald of this college have escutcheons listed been entrusted with examining ginated in that way.
contains
oui.
That is why many applicants are findig It cheaper to adopt the
method alternative
of having a new coat-of-arm granted to them. The fece for this. Including the handsome box containing the parchment scroll on which the crent emblazoned, are round about £150.
taken
for
fur
London Exprem Service
MANY poopla are discovering that they con display
a coat of arms without necessarily having a person with titled ancestry. Interest in haraldry is growing, and more excutcheons have boon registered during the last 30 yours than in the previous thrae centuries,
SIX STEPS ΤΟ THE MOON
By Peter Fairley
FORTY billion dollars that means
£14 thousand million.
That is the price which the American riation must pay-50 experts testify--if it now
Iman on wants to get a
the moon ahead of Russia.
The dilemma
And even that price carries na
guarantee.
Blx steps must first be taken,
Put Congress has been tuk that they can be taken in sle years instead of the planned 10-if the cash is found. The alternative? Years and years of finishing second at every stage of the Space _Race. A sense of being dworted in
Losa rocket technology. prestige, In American parlance a hell of
dilemma.
But
D1
these are the things which sensible, serious-minded American scientists pre now working on and for which tremendous pressure will be applled on President Kennedy to get an "OK."
man
STEP ONE--Orbiting
round earth. It is unlikely to happen before autumn, no matter how much money is available.
It depends not on the man or his capsule, but on the booster. Alias, the chosen bouster, is still unreliable. Scientists may witch to Titan, 19. glant,
duc go into squadron ser vice with the U.S. Air Force.
STEP TWU--Controlling a Toe- kot near, or around, the moon. Long-range guidance must be Ruscons perfected. As the now know, it is no use sand- ing a rocket to a planet if you cannot get its messages back or tell it what to do. Two U.S. "ring-around-the- moon" shots have flopped be- cause of booster failure. Work a now series, known as Project Ranger, is well ad- vanced.
should culminate Five frings
next year with the impacting 8001b. shock-proofed of a package at instruments on the moon's surface.
оп
the claims of everyone wishing Among the thousands of to have annorjal bearings in examples in the College of Arms England. In Scotland, the duly archives are many now In Union, and Randolph in performed by the Lord Lyon abeyance, yet they could be re- More corporale bodies and Churchill Justifies it by the King of Arme, whose head vived by a direct descendant of private concerns are applying
coals-of-arms, too. number of speeches given hurc quarters are in Edinburgh.
coat-of- for the Arst grantee. A
Arms which dwell on the necessity of
ulsio
out arms does not completely lapse are Anglo-American friendship.
The heralds delve back into their unique centuries-old Ales until the line has entirely died official or semi-omcial reasons,
High sheriffs of counties, The reader will and many to find out whether the appli-
example, need a crest for their intimate, glimpses of the great cant hat any forebears who How do you go about getting barrers, and members of the man, his incredible blend of possessed a grant of arms. one of these coveted escut Orders of Chivalry 'need one. authority and modesty,
chcous? For an English coat-
The College of Heralds exists One Ust of crests For example, when Attlee said
of-aims your arst step in to not only to investigate the In our Island by trial and of Churchill's war sperches that about 30,000, and few of them approach one of the Itzalds and claims of applicants but also to error and by perseverance they expressed the will of the have over belonged to. tilled explain your case,
prevent the duplication of escut- across the centuries we whole nation, and he replied: familier,
Ife practises rather ke a
cheons, no easy task in view of found out a very good. Their will was resolute and
burrister, and will receive your the large number already exist. Here it is "The Queen remorseless, and,
no it proved,
"brief to find out whether
ing, either in use or dorinant. unconquerable. It fell to me to
crest under yohte sumame was The College of Arms has had
In that event many vehement critics. express it..
"FL
he will then try to discover 1. Round, the eminent 18th cen-
In fact a tury whether you
scholar, declared descendant of that carlier holder he could not understand the of armorial bearings.
effort to perslinde the public Then will follow the delicate,
tricky.... ihat the grant of arma is a
it le STEP THREE- The "parking oblained for notoriously
the orbit," This involves patting Into orbit a platform or "space nere payment of cash,”
station" froin which Nevertheless, as long as family
any number of orbila-a big honour and xolidarity are re
rocket can be launched deep garded as virtues, coats-of-arms
Into space. The Russians sont their Venua probe winging on its way by this method. expanding interest in armorial bearings is to be prulsed rather] It pay be possible to send a
ewed inbonstilp [liero then deploreL
can do no wrong."
Dad advisers can be changed as often as the people like to for that pur- use their rights
Out he comen with the frat three words of the Aeneid.
He spy: The quotation Ja, Arma virumque cano, which, for pose. the benefit of our Winchester friends, 1
translate inuy Arms and the
JU
A great baitis is lost. Parlin- Zang, ment turns out the Government. That generally describes my A great battle is won. Crowda
theme.'
men
pitshen
wall
Traders had them
ever registered,
Are
Could be costly special privilege, "when
Dr J.
that
nation and race dwelling all round the globe that had the lion heart. I had the luck to be called on to give the roar."
that The fallacy
armorial So it was just luck, was it, all bearings are restricted to per- the fartention that this one cheer the Queen.
song of high rank dies hard. man gave to the free world?
THI -costa-of-arths were What
goes wrong
Nobody will believe that,
The cost of the research may nway with the politiciang Nebody but Sir Winston would originally used sa distinguishing
other In shields so be £30 or co. 1 WK 80% have dared to say it.
sa on knights' responsible.
that friend could be distingulah- #lances if much more involved right La lala
ed from foe on the battle fleid. Investigailom is needed, the will be prized. From this point alter of our wilted Com monwealth and Empire.
Tho Vogritwa Atitastcé – #finston In the Mkile Ages only men bill may run into hundreds of of view, at any rate, the present
6. Churekha, dprochen
of military cante und theo, and pande. Even.co,, the work has utlo The Unwritten The
edited by Rambién Chahuch men were unwaily ülled ip, be paid, for whether it pro 1,50 Caitskell, swallows the halt and Alliance" is taken from a speach
Jucen results or not. warriors who uwned land, zises to inquire: "Should it not he made to the English-Speak-
DELIGHT
And picturo the Ineffable delight on his face when that old Wineliester friend, Mr Hugh
or tho
*(London Expratz Geroles).
after
and
more than
buck by Bring it straight from earth. But the Russians cal- culate that to send one man There for one week by this method will need a "chip" weighing 3,000 tons. So it seems simpler to carry the bits of your moonship up to 8 platform where less motor power is needed to escape from gravity's clutches — and use that as the jump-off point and return rendezvous.
Three U.S. Brms are now aludy- ing how to do this, for a fee of nearly one million dollars. They call it Project Apollo.
STEP FOUR-"Soft-Jonding" o
laboratory ол the America has two
moon, schemes
afoot Surveyor and Pro- spector. The Surveyor craft, to touch gently down on the sterile planet, will stay there for 30 days.
It will carry tape-recorders, an 18in-long drill, and four TV host of eamoras bealdes a selentile instruments. The whole laboratory should weigh about Bewt, on touch-down, Ils delll will dig up samples for analysis by the equipment aboard. Cost? More than 30 million dollars.
A drive on the moon
Prospector will complete the trick by disgorging a tracked vehicle to crawl over the moon's surface in search of samples. These steps are vital to avoid contaminating the planet with human germs before scientists have a chance to eximine the priceless evidence there. So to
STEP FIVE-the monkey on the Moon, Hussin will đồ it with dogs. Americu prefers the ape, belleving it to be more like a human. Either an provide ample proof of the satèle of the operation before a lie is risked. And
Be- STEP SEX-man himself,
fote he atepa from his craft, he will have taken a peek at the pinnet from close quafters on an Earthi-moon-earth orbit. Such a looping orbilt will probably be achieved within five years for it te infinitely easier than the "soft-landing.” These things will surely happen, There is no longer a shadow of doubt, How-rión, dependa on the value America | pinqua on being fiZEL,
LOGO EXTTI" Stuki).