THE CHINA MAIL, WEDNESDAY, MAY 24, 1961.
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British newsletter from Peter Burgoyne
'We really begin
to wonder about
the comic colonel'
London.
He is too painfully well-remembered abroad to need any detailed sketch- ing-in by us: the comic English colonel, whose touchingly simple creed it was that any foreigner could be made to understand anything if you only shouted at him loudly enough.
THE LOWER Swindling LEVELS ticket
tout gets
by
Rufort Ratcliffe 12 months
Musical Madness
The London Philharmonic Orchestra was "flooded
London.
FIVE football fans who swopped two expen- withsive Cup Final tickets for five 3s. 6d. ones re- ceived a shock when they to the Wembley got
they were
applications" when it started looking for a girl "to play the typewriter" in a performance of Erik Satio's "Parado."
This remarkable musical com- position. 1። a50 scored "police siren, pistol and foghorn"
Remembered, we hasten to add, through European cabaret acts and news-
paper cartoons. Never encountered any longer, we like to believe, in according to the report. the apopleptic pink.
But dammit, sir! We really begin to wonder.
our
Mr Rednald Maudling, 44-year-old President ot the Board of Trade, left with his wite for Moscow, where he opened Britain's
Russian trade fair.
Art
loud long and hunting horn.
But Sheba the
The conductor sald he anti- cipated the girl chosen would Here have "fantastic-shaped glasses а like
Ah yes, we knew it. our piste. Let the sun set on land be "streamlined and glossy Gur Empire if it will, and the like a raller glamorous and Irish (all those potatore cannot typical American secretary." do them any good) beat us the grub-stakes record.
and
the
foxhound, seated placidly on her table, neiler yelped nor bristled. She just looked the other way accepted a custard cream.
She had come over frem Mrs Maudling, by way of pre-enemy. She was brain-washed paration, had been busy study-küler no longer, but a lady. ing Russian--alone. Her hus- bund believes in sticking to Engilsti.
Taking stand?
A challenge
It all began two months ago when
Shoba, scampering
Semersell the lush any other through Quote: "Speaking
the Dutvertu leads language only
tnis meadows where W understandings and misunder Hunt rides, wandered acciden- ! standings can be serious when tally into the League's 300-acre they have a bearing on Britain's sanctuary at Barlynch, trade problems."
It was a king-sized challenge to Mr John Grove, the warden,
be would not Could Sheba
won? Why
Well and good, if Mr Maud ng neans that he
like to the up the purchase
uf should the Chinese Communists
ul cal indoctrination?
เอ
Britain (573 copies per 1,000) has the largest newspaper vir-! culation in the world.
Britain The bellringers of
will surely strike a medal for the brother whose team was taking part in a contest the other day. His trousers fell down. fe his let them stay there reund ankles, and
misked never netu.
☆
#
next year's Uzbekistan carpet | have a monopoly on psychologie! It sounds alarming. From output on the strength phrase or two
carriage
Measts.
self-tutor.
conversation Somebody's
A
of railway- He took Sheba home
na she from Baronsdown Farm just Russian was-lean, hoy and ferocious--
his! and put her in the care of 17-year-old daughter Carol.
But if he is taking his stand (and surely he cannot be?) with to luck The colonel, it begins more alarming.
13 that
The spoilsport truth The colonel's brusque technique for unter-ractal communication was always a dismal og. The more he bellowed and roared in English at an inpassive French water, the more he got nowhere at all-and the more he Wa5 punished for it when Paddition" arrived.
An interpreter Anyway, for Mr Maudling in Mancow it will have to be an interpreter, like the
who accompanied Nikita Khrushchev on his barn-storming tour of the United States.
one
Millions saw on newsreels and television this accomplished fel low's astonishing virtuoso per formance, as he translated with fired deft speed the questions by reporters at his boss, and the king barangues fired back.
il
He never hesitated, never
Diten, alumbled. But
to watcher, It seemed strange that something it took so many words to say in Russian could be enn-
into verted
so little English of a single the luss without nuance,
1 is no mean point that Mr Scime Maudling provokes. (notably our Mr Harold Pinter, in vogue) a playwright much
breakdown In fear a jet-age
amorg ecmanunication even those who share a common lan- Rilege.
Then the insidious course be gen. Firm kindness, good food, cautious introductions to anbaals But for the foxhounds detest.
the first few weeks, whenever hunt parsed by, Sheba quivered at the "Tantivy when humans could not even hear it.
A triumph
Then, slowly, her blood-lust faded. Soon she was turning a and dent ear to foxy noises would not even chase a fem- hunt yard chicken. When the came by again she could not care less.
It was a triumph. Sheba the and huntress was fat, friendly
[0 be said) a little (il has foolish.
They do not talk about her now down in Dulverton hunting
They do not even circles. her.
own
Dash it, if ever the foxes got to hear about that brain-wash- ing course...
*
morc
BAD ENOUGH
I usually mumble "pardon me, what was that you said?" turnstiles and keep this up for a minute told the tickets or so with my mitt cupped to
my car. The less polite ones forged.
yell "what's wrong with you? Beaf or something?"
Generally, I shake my skull sadly and say "Yes, very deaf. The sounds here did in me car- drums years ago."
DEAF TRICK
of
When 1 Was the guest
<f the Con refined hoeserows in Japan, 1 felged deafness after the first couple of days,
were
But with the help of the the police the five faus sow Final-and the ticket tout who swindled them was jailed for 12 months by Hendon sex) magistrates.
Middle-
John
The tout, 24-year-old James Cavanagh, of no settled address, pleaded guilty to three charges concerning forged Cup Final lelets.
Tals sounds bad enough to start with. The "muste" she'll render will be that of a profes-on slonal typist making the bell ring at the end of each line.
discovered It worked wonders, What a pity there won't be Instead of the warders yelling a performance of "Parade" in at me. they hmored me al- this neck of the woods. 11 together making finger-signs would be dead easy to liven that I was batty and deaf.
It up with plie drivers, ! screeching bus gears, squeal- ' Actually I am now a bit deaf Ing bleycle brakes, hawker's and I suppose a bit batty too. stlekk-banging,
ille Who would't be having to bash mahjong and bashing
the (exotle) ruddy typewriter for a crust Hound emitted by the popul-;---and never get invited to play
of one in an orchestru? исе in slurping bowls noodles.
STEADY DRONE
Rumming rhnically through The Background, could be steady drone of carefully edited with the stirleks, howls, tupes means and Bellows of rage of assorted palefaces who've been Riven a dozen successive wrong phone numbers-or have tried
Britain and America we
warned that ore
more and
women
arc suffering from it. New York specialist Dr Irwin Lubowe Baid cently that within a decade nearly OUTLY third of women would be unwilling victims.
Now the Institute of Trichot keep partoling their names logy in Britain worries us with the sweet creatures at the other and getting these fouled up by the news that more
than halt end of the line. the patients is their Brixton he spital are women,
How would you like it your wife anncumeed casually over supper that she was going bald?
Tourists often tell me they love the sounds of the (exotic, fiselnating colourful and cap- tivating) Far East."
the
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MAILS FOR OTHER COUNTRIES
By Air WEDNESDAY, MAY 24 Iran (Latter Mail) Noon; Вила. Aden, Africa, Grezi Britain, Europe Nces; Philippines Letter Mall (Letter Mail) a pin (Parcel Mad) pm India, Midlo Fast Parcel service: to Lebanon) Letter Mad))
The court was told that when the five fans-from Lelcenter-in (Parzel Mail) 2 ; Br. New Guinea Australia, New Zealand, tickets were
Fii (Letter Mall)
Parcel forged they walked round the Malli 2 pm; Jaosa (Letter Mall) a stadium approaches and spotted in Farret Math 2 pin: Hawaii, Cavanagh among the touts, still SAN. C. & S. America Letter
3 Di Parcel Mally North Borney Letter Malit trying to sell tickets,
Police stepped in and found (Parcel Mail) 5 pm.
By Surface 27 tickets In Cavanagh's
Argentine. Drazil, E. pockela. Then passer-by union of S. Africa (Letter handed them 14 re that❘ Nocn Cavanagh dropped in the road.
Later
ן
£60 WORTH
Cavanagh admitted
2 pin:
6 pm
Aldea, Madi
having purchased 150 dud Cup Double dummies
Final tickets for 100,
"They were quite good for-
London. sald Detective Con Herles,"
Thieves broke the plate-gioso "and it window of the Slot-TV company stable Alan Jolins, they hadn't been detected as in Caledonian-roud, early as they were a number of Cross, and stole two television
genuine tickets seis. Both were dummies. people with
London Express Service.
O Lord our Lord, how ex-would have been very dis- cellent is thy name in all the appointed." earth!-Psalm 8:9.
The works of the Creator
reveal flis glory and power. And it is One like this whom we should know in a personal way as "our Lord." Press-Radio Bible Service.
Inc Cincinnati, Ohla
CHINA MAIL ENTERTAINMENT GUIDE
7
FILMS
ROXY
MAJESTIC: "Aty" David Ladd, Arthur O'Conur. KING'S & BROADWAY: "Eimer Gantry," with Burt Lancaster, Jean Simmons.
HOOVER & GALA: "Murder at 45 B.P.M.,“ with Danielle Darrieux, Michel Auclair.
ROYAL & STATE: "Carry On Re-
Aidary with gardless,"
James, Kenneth Connor,
LEE
PRINCESS: "#partacus,"
Kirk Douglas, Laurence starring Davier, Jean Stromans, Peter Us- Μπον,
8," Elizabeth HITZ: "Butterfeld
Taylor, 1.anrence Harvey,
Naked In the ORIENTAL "GO
World." Gina Lollobrigida, Anthony Francicz, Ernest Borgnine. ASTOH: "Woman of Bome", with
Gina Lollobrigida.
with Bill PARAMOUNT: "Gergo".
Travers, William Sylvester WORLD;" "Yive Criminala,"
Yoko Mihara, Shigeru Amachi, CAPITOL: The Cola Game,"
NIGHT SPOTS CHAMPAGNK: The Five Pink Pearla
Irons Japan, and Susan Stepu
tena DanL-WRIA) PARAMOUNT:
Duo Alexander; Can Girls. GOLDEN POGENIX: Star Leo Bing
China Autica, and the Sense tional Acrobatic Team Wasta and
There is always a crumb of comfort somewhere. Even, though at first glance we do not
appear to leap with any particular lustre in from its solid pages, tho United Nations
Year Book Statistical just issued in New York. The Irish (calory intake: 3,500) are the best fed nation in the (335 world. The
Americans cars for every 1,000 citizens) are the most mobile. The Russians are the biggest film fans.
of course. We get placed, Britons come fourth in *he It was a tense moment in calorific league-table, and
Caxton Hall, West- in the mobility stakes (98 cars are actually minster. Members of the per 1,000). We League Against Cruel second best at watching televi- GRANDEL LOUNGE: Sports watched breath- lessly as, halfway through thair ORNUA! mcoting, thair chairman Mr Ed-
We do not know the answer. But please not the colonel
ogain.
sion.
We knew it But don't We come first t Not even anything any more?
with
and Tokyo Can
METROPOLITAN:
Vocellat Mos i stone:,, 7, News Headlines, Brahm Betty Wong and the Metropoillan Lebeslleder Woltzen: 7.16. 'Superman' band.
BLUE HEAVEN & BALL de 02 730. Dick Halvorsen, B.
Tokyo Can Can Girls; Duo Artedie and Prof. Locht iros.
PÄRK HOTEL: Cino at the piano, SHATIN HEIGHTS HOTEL:
Beltran and his Combo.
12 Lc
News and Weather 0.16, Buddy Gregg Enterlains; 8.30. Common wealth Day programine complied by Dick Demuth: 0. News Headlines. Twn of a Kind, Bing Crosby: 0.15. Radio Report by John Wallace: 30. John Gunstone's Newsical; 10. News and Weather; 10.13. Carmen Machlae: 10.39, Concert: 1. Rodio Newsreal and Weather; 1139, Mutie; tidnight, News Headlines, Weather, Close,
REDIFFUSION
RADIO HONGKONG (A31-370m. Bɛoke, FM--Jinic,) 12:30 pm. Gown Show trepeat): 1, The Signal. Diary: 13. Weather: 1.19, Time Signal, News: 130. Johing Dankworth reprall; 2, Theme and (repeat) 230. We Live Variation
Noon. Light Moud (repeati: and Lesta (repeat); 4, Hindleford:
12.00 pm, Local Gold Rate, Clitheroe 9.30. Young Tea presented by
Kid repent); 1. Diary: 1.15. Newa Pamela: B. Homeward Bound 5.68,
and Weather: 150, Ray's Laugh Weather; 6, Tune Signal, News, 6.10,
(final)-trepest): 2. Melody Time: Interlude: 6.15, Muste from Holland:
4.15. Tea Dance; 4.45, Operaten 0.30. Speaking Generally (Brittl
The Moon Satellite: 5, Children's Comer Council Programming: 0.45. Archers; 7, Time Signal, Today - --presented by Auntie Dee: 8.30, by Michael Page: "7.35, Sek Kong Requests presented by ke Way for Music: 7.45, Strings Barry Haigh: 0. Anything Goes un Parade; 7.58, Weather; 8, Time With Mike Elery: Hongkong It Signat, News, Commentary 11.15. Parade: 7.26, Sibg Along With Us: Bookshop: 9.30, From the Concert 1.55. You Said -presented by HnRrcial by Milkfred Kin
John Shepard; 6. News; 8.00, Wea- (piano) and Glpiletín Tom (soprano) ther:
and 3.10. Announcementa accompantert by Evelyn Kwongs Interlude: 3.15, Muste in the Air: 6,30, Music Show: 0, From A to Z 19. Letter from Ameelen: 6.15. We're
in the Business: 9.45, George Cerah In Show Biz; 9.30, Birthdays and win: $98, Weather: 10, Tane Signol,
Analversaries 135. Consider Your Nether! 11. Time Signal and Bl
News about Britain: 10.53,
Verdlet; 10, Deans Day Show- less, Rello Newareet: 1.15 Chamber presented by Tony Myatt; 11. Stop
(Final): 10.30, Sweet with ▸ Beat Music Recital: 1151, Weather: 11.59. News Headlines; Midnight. Time Pre News Headlines; 11.03. Date
In Dreamland; Midnight, Closo. Signal, Close.
TELEVISION
COMMERCIAL RADIO
Kena Dabi. MAXIMU Musle by Franco Trombetta and hi Ilalan Combo. PARIS: Yuri Shiraka from Japan. BEAN HOTEL: 4.09 Vlia & his band, Bally Con-
(190 m. 2530 ke) cperan at the piano.
Moon, Lunchtime Rendezvous: 1.15 OLOUCESTER HOTEL: Baddle anđ
1.30. pon. Newn and Weather: Sirlo
Bir Lancelot, Calypi", Lichtline Rendezvous; 2. Compriser Peixiong, Guitarist from Trinidad, or the Day; 2.43, Interlude; 3. For CARLTON Linn Coeu LEG sts the Ladies presented by Mary Cut
Combo, featuring the versace
Hring Tea Dance; 430. Weather; 4.01, Children's Conier — with A-
Vic Cristobal
Pearls from Japan and Sabrina.
In
5 pm, Chinese Children's Talent Show-produced by M. Chan; 3.15, Laurel & Hardy: 8.33, Hara's Hoc key: 6.43, New Homes For Beavers: 535, Cartoons; C. Close: 1.30. Newe English: 139, Wells Fargo: 8. News (Chinese Commentary) 10. No Hiding Place: 9.05, News #Fallch Commentary): 0.15. On The Spot: 2.33. Big Band Lash; 6. Newa; 8.10 930, Contonese Feature: 11.15. Late Sonnet, Werner Muller, 0.30, 1 Fi Night Final, News Headlines, Waa- Club presented by John Con- i ther and Announcements. Clown.
in a world in which the popula- | PRINCESS GARDEN: The Five Pluk | tie Morvi Arilain of Distinction: ward Hemingway cupped tion will pass the 3,000 million SUNYA: Sing Lee Sing Show and his hands and hallooed mark this year?,
LJ PO CHUN CHAMBERS,
DES VOEUX ROAD, C.,
SING LEE SING FAMILY Dancer Songs " Comedy Juggling Acrobats
1 SHOW AT 1.15 A.M.
Dito Alexander,
State
RESTAURANT &
NIGHT CLUB
Proudly Presents
THE WORLD RENOWNED
TOKYO CAN CAN GIRLS
Most Spectacular Attraction Ever Come from the Land of Cherry Blossoms!
Performed in PARIS HAWAII * U.S.A. FASCINATING! GORGEOUS!
OO! LA! LAT OUI QUI
1 SHOW AT 10.15 P.M.
RESERVATION: TEL. 45341
THE JAPANESE DANCER MISS YURI SHIRAKA First timo in Hong Kong Enchanting! Alluring!
1 SHOW AT 12 MIDNIGHT
added that ; had two previous
"Detective Johns Cavanagh convictions
King's
courts in the name of O'Rourite
both at Lelcester CROSSWORD
and was in fact wanted by the Leicester police on another matter.
Another tout, 17-year-old Leonard Walter Young, of who Morris-road. Dagenham, sold a forged ticket for £2, was was dred £50.
Four other men facing charges concerning forged Bekets remanded until May 23.
TARGET
FOE
BOY
FUN
were
How many
words ar
four felters FIF MUTE CO You ke from
the
Letters In the RTO
the left In making 19% the words. Sear letter may be used unce 15 contala the there must be at least one ten-letter word in the Ist. Na plurals ; no forelen
no proper nungs TODAY'S TARGET: 21 words, Good: 21 words, DOTY pood: 43 words, cccclient, solution tomorrow.
Bach
word inrie letter,
and
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION: Kotle uztiak artistle astër asimet
Patin INABTIRTIC nitrie alt tant rtani salat rotih satiric scant stain stair star stort glatte stint «Er strain struit strict tarit tart fain taint fanisi Tarn tars tink titanje tract train trail tranall
rins.
London Express Service.
10
Across
1. Benttered. ()
10. 2017. fi. Prust. (48
22. Toy cards.
18. Unlikelier.
15. Metatila noise. (5)
10. Consumom,__ (6)
18. Praising. (9).
1. Necessity. 09. 22. Tribesmen. (6) 23. Hele, (0. 3)
Down
1. Hrage effcet. 16, 8). 1. Michlet maker.
Divided, 19)
6. Poverty-stricken.
5. Zellah. (5)
8. Boy's name.
1. Expires. (4)
10)
6. Quarra
V. Piattom
14. Point Of
entry
34;
for on
an electriMLI
Intention
en) Burkett
กอ
17
(4)
(5)
(4)
HOR GOED
19. Taited. (Teaterday's in 10. Boirondon Express Service..
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