A pretty face shouldn't panic an office!
THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, MAY 6, 1961.
SATURDAY MAGAZINE
JAK
SEX is one of the things a prospective employer and
must take into account when interviewing a would-be employee, Mr E. W. Hughes of Durham University has told a gathering of personnel managers at Nottingham.
He wasn't as you might ex- put, advising the owners of Striptease joints about prosper-
ve bubble dancers. He talking of office wurkers. Tolk- ing nonsense,
TROUBLE
enn
WAA
It went on to say: "Over glamorcus women
bring trophle into a peaceful Csab- lament,"
I'm not sure what Mr Hughes mans by over-glamorous; I don't know what his standard of gluncur 19.
But in my experience There me not many girls offering themselves for office work who o be described ao over- glamnious by any standards.
Ir they have outstanding physical attributes, they are ually pursuing some other carcer as !m starlets or mudela,
Anyway, the obvious amplica- tion of Mr Hughes remarks is that it is a hazardous enistake suploy a really attractive gal in your offler.
- חנוt
by
LOGAN
GOURLAY
I've employed secretaries in all shapes and sizes, ha all de- grees of intelligence, stupidity. and pulchritude,
I've never found that the really attractive ones were the leost efeleni,
GEORGE
I
IT is not nice to dis- cover that one has been clasping a viper to one's bosom, or to come upon proof that a com- rade, ostensibly decent and clean living, is no more than an outcast.
In my simple way, I bad Blways thought Jnk pinyed a straight bat, however alicky the wicket. Now I know differently. and. frankly, the whole subject in solid and distasteful.
They did ndi, for example, But for the Graveney crisis allow themselves to bein the nation's affairs, unn interrupted by phone calls from | might have felt incliued to let suitors as Më Hughes fears. the rotter rot, or send the end
to Coventry.
They usually had that depart- ment of their lives extremely well organised.
DREAMS !
Remember, 10: that girts en wate a lot of day-diaming dismally.
plam time
And does the glamorous girl arcuse the jealous fre of her tesa-endowed colleagues?
But these are anxious times- times when it behoves all of us to recognise the devlis In our midst.
I blame myself in a way. I should have recognised that Jnk was hot one of us when. many weeks ago, he failed to be up standing at the mention of the | name of Sir Jack Hobbs.
One wia even prepared to accept it as a Juke when Jak, on being informed that the Aus tralians were arriving replied: "What for?"
This, think, is puritanical absurdity, reminiscent of our inhibited forefathers who sidered that a pretty face mist cances the soul of a temptress.
I know a secretary who within weeks of joining a large organi-nal, crushing Carried te its lagical con- chslun
has it
terrifying
salon was asked by the others revelation, no prespects for
to give the hint on inake-up. Orvellim world,
clothes sense, and grooming.
DT
What the Ban-The-Beauties are really advogating,, if only they would admit it, is n soviely In which
But the -
longer 10 bp
over - locked,
And think of the effect
that
ignored, 07
on
the male members of the staff.
on attractive girl can have
we all conform to a dull grey pattern. Stune sorts, not a temptation. carne clothes, same looks,
It can be inspirational, a tonic.
Perish the prospect. Give are the braule who does not remind me of that fament of Ogden Nush: "I wish I liked the hunt caes, I wish I liked Its silly far
The man who is distructed from his desk by a pretty profile, US who chases
netrical ankle around The ing cabinets, is more common in comic strips than in real life,
-(London Express Servicej,
excused, came when he was
heard by sev-
eral independ
ent by-stand-
ers to ask: "Who is Gra- veney?" ]
600GLIES Í CHINAMEN ONLY
NO
Flannelled fools?
Never one like
IDEAL RESIDENCES FOR SALE
this.......
he could fearn all he wanted to know about cricket without moving from the next depart ment, the bar,
JACOBY on BRIDGE
Luck and skill win CARD Sendek..
for team
Easi Sculli West Tasa 24
The bidding has been:
North 1
3
Pass You, South, hold:
7
AKQJ107 VO JA805
Pass
KQ2
What do you do? A-This is indeed a lough one,
TODAY'S QUESTION
I think I may say at even took Jak quietly aside and beg- Peter May would have approved ged him, for
Everything was one, in fact, LTERE is a hand that again the sake of the
until Mr Gover let loose two
Illustrates team of four luck of the calm way I dealt with the side, to let me rescue the perish
donkey drops that situation. No panle. No indis Ing. to permit me
ony Feif- although maybe we should give to exorcise criminate swiping. Instead, I him. to free
respecting schoolboy would have the lucky South player credit and purify him However, I eventually per- hit to Clapham Junction. The for skill also. fron telean spirit.
sunded hakus into the inner first Jak dispatched firmly with To give the devil his due, Juk temple, where, at the nets, we the meat of the bat, and nobody The bidding at both tables but your best cholze is probably agreed, albelt with a leer, and I discovered Alf Gover, Arthur would have complained had Jak was identical. At Table Ong to merely rebid to three spadea lost no tine hustling him down Wellard of Somerset, and Joe been in possession of the meat West
opened the ninc to be inflated at Alf Gover's Skelton, the Harrow coach, put- of the bat, or any part of the spades. South won in dummy next.
of to see what your partner dors cricket school at Wandsworth. ting their best feet forward (and bat, at the moment of impact. and lost the club Anesse tu
To some
morons, of course, elbows correctly placed, of As it was, the company West's king. West shifted to the Gover
establishment is course) in the instruction of the ducked smartly out of danger, the eight of hearts. South merely a 100-year-old converted young on four precious wickets and Mr Gover explained to cashed all his high clubs, stable-luft over a garage, as the fast, medium-paced, fast-that- the new pupil ihat. however hearts: and spades and decided unbelieving Jak did not fall to keeps-a-bit-jow, and one-that- much you might hate the bowl! If anyone was going to point out when I knocked three turns,
er, it was not customary to hold the three missing dia- times and asked for Alf at the "Looks like an avlary, or u throw your defensive weapon at monds it would be West so he side door.
coconut shy," proclaimed Jak, hlm. loudly, and heedless of the fact The second, and last, ball of that he was standing on ground - Jak's innings got a much bigger hallowed by Sandbani and laugh. It hit him squarely amid- Strudwick In 1920, and latterly ships.
After a decent interval, the graced by May, Tyson, Loker, Graveney Garfield Sobers, coaches drew lots to decide Hanif Mohammed, and other which of them was to teach Jak nll-time grents,
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For full particulars and price list please anle
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red balls
A jest!
Twn colytes in flannels were playing as we entered, and Jak, after close inspection, sald E had no idea they used so many in erickel. A frigid silence followed, but I managed | to pass it off as a merry Jest
when one of the chaps explain- any as a thousand cricketers a anxious mothers, the schoolboys week here," be said, "From were asked to withdraw from schoolboys to Test players. We the moment Jok got his hand unen taught a man with one eye on the ball. Me too without Another awkward hiatus occurred when Jalt insisted that and on artificial leg how to score being asked.
to bowl--and which of them was with fortitude:
Gover acepted the situation to bat while Jak was bowling. "We have us Also, in order not to alarm their
ed that the game was snooker.
enlied
THE EASY
WAY TO
FIX FLAT TYRES
WATCHED o motorist
mend a puncture
in less than two minutes. And ho didn't
even tako the
wheel off his car.
The fat tyre was coupled with a flex uke that on a bicycle pump to a cylinder smaller than
a grease gun.
nity. On Use other hand, we niso tried to teach a client for two years before we found out he was left-handed. We tackle anything-er anybody."
Screams
ing friendly advice on the way he should be facing when, after suitable preparation of length, directlos und spin, he eventual- ly let By.
After half an hour with Jak, frm half-nelson, and way offer- As I left, Gover find Jak in a
I migh: Fay, Mr Gover Was rather less confident, but no- body could have tried harder.
"Cricket is not a complicated game." he told the man I once called friend. "You merely put three sticks In the ground, and, if you are a bowler, you try to hit those three sticks with a leather ball. If you are a bats man, you try to defend both the sticks and yourself, to which pur pose you are armed with a de- fensive wooden club, known as a bat.
'Empire'
"If, in the process of this de- fence, you are hit on the leg. you could be crippled for lilo. What is worse, you are probably lbw.
"On these basic rudiments an The aluminium cylinder had Empire was founded, a way of a self-plercing nozzle and once life begun. And the prke for it was connected to the tyrobeginners ls 15s, per half hour." valve tubeless or tube- it re- One would have thought that tenned a highly compressed mix- this simple hut eloquent ex- fare of air and chemicals which faith by a man who took 1,051 planation, offered in all good
blew up the lyre.
The sealing compound of butyl wickets for Surrey and England' 23.05), would have and plastic contains billions of (average microscople Abtes And in try clarifted
cricket for oven the
ing to escape from the tyre the most obstinately Ignorant.
But I fear that Jak's per- chemical locates the puncture, plug the hole with fibre andformance on the Wandsworth to be wicket left something
Then soltaises,
and
know if you I am told that a car can be desired. I do not driven for as long as necessary have ever seen a contortionisk with the scaling compound al-stricken with the palty in d
motorists though many
may middle of his act but li was prefer to have the tyre repaired something like that. In the usual way later.
Flannelled, gloved, Because it depends on high padded, Jak looked tolerably pressure, each 47, 04. kit can presentable. He even managed be used only twice on tores flecting Impression of intelli- itted to small popular cars and rence when Gover told him to once on larger care.
"keep the "V" of the left hand, The invention, known.
forefinger, as between thumb and "Repair 'n' Air," was developed pointing to the left shoulder, In the United States after four and the 'V' of the right hand years research.
similarly directed towards the London Express Servico. (right shoulder."
Beyond hearing a few screams of unearthly anguish, I have no exact evidence on what happen-
next few ed in the
minutes. Gover having handed me my and it is 158. back, refused to comment, only from outside that subsequently learned about the fumigation measures, the posting of sentries, and new arrangements with the Insurance companies,
Bources
As for Jak, he has told me what I can do with Hobbs, Graveney, and the whole of the Australian team. It was forth- right and expliclt-but it was hardly cricket.
GEORGE WHITING
---(Lendon Express Service).
TARGET
SIR
CAT
OAR
How many
words of
for Intley
or more.
गय anke From 1ae
Letters in i gara
on the Test T
the wor
cuch
makina
tetter
may be used unro vitis, Sneh würd musi contain the turge letter, and
Sheza must us at east and len-letter word in the list. No plorata: no Coreign words 1 no proper names, TODÁNH TARGET: 38 words. good: 40 words, very good 84" words, azenlient, Solution on Atonilar,
VESTKABAYA AOLUTION I Kerie Ever expire express EXPRESSIVE prer peere juler press previje prive reeve repa revise ripe tine clve seep neet selse sepa auta neries serțe saver suvere steve aire alxer apite apres per Verne' keeper viper.
London Express Bervice.
led a small diamond from dam-
WEST
A9012
108643
• None
NORTH AAK?
VAQ
• KJ754 4J62
22
You do bid three spades and your partner bids four hearts. What do you do now?
Answer tomorrow.
my and went up with his ace. West showed out and South had to go down three.
At the other table West opened the four of henris. East played the nine. South lost the club finesse and West ted the three of hearts to clear the sult. Now South cashed three
apades and noted from the fall
EAST
A J 103
JD75 Q02
of the
spades that West
had
4K 1097
853
started
with four spades.
Ho
SOUTHI (D)
4 Q13
*K 2
A 10 303 AAQI
East and West vulnerable South West North East IN.T. Pass GN,T. Pasa Paza Pasa
Opening lead-- 9 at table 1; Opening lend...♥ 4 at table 2
BY .
cashed 'noted
the last two clubs and that West had started with either three or four clubs,
The heart plays had marked West with five hearts sa South saw that West could not have more than one diamond. Now South played dummy's king of diamonds and spread his hand when West showed out.
If diamonds had broken two- one the other South would have made the hond also.
THE WAY
by Beachcomber
BUNCH of daffodils arrived sceousses! What sauts du loup! corner from the impetuous Char A yesterday for Mimale Slop- What virevoltes: What rot!
te Suct.
News from Helicon
Slopeorner,
have written a poem con- "he'll touch her sisting entirely of punctuation hand,
us though by accident, marks should have added a few during some accursed lecture on exclamation Industrial
marko, for the co-operation. And emotional effect. Perhaps I led when she. falters, Me Suet! the way with my "Dawn Inside You really shouldn't the oaf Vesuvius." will move his own hand away as though
Lava, they said; lava; What bird; would; king,
there, Daun darkncas?
"Any day now," anid Mr THE port who is reported to
stung by a moddened scorpion." Said Mrs Slopcorner, "It was a kindly thought. She can wear one of them at the Luton Vegetable Rally if she in elected Miss Cauliflower."
The elephant in ballet
THE
no tree, For, nesting, lava they, satd Because. There, was nothing Else, to sav
London life
CHRONICLER remarked the
HE Introduction of real plge-other day that modern girls ons into a ballet opens the are sick of flottery. Any day way for a real elephant. Hlo now we may read:- clumsy movements would set of ... I saw Baba Blacksheep, |the exquisite grace of the Human the ugliest and worst - dressed dancers, and he could easily be girl of the season. She Was laught to encircle the walit of laughing at one of her own silly the prima ballerina and throw jokes, and the sound was like a her to the fool in a leopard skin wati falling in. Nuclen Fudgo- (corryluk tomfool bow and ar- Smailcraft, her rival in hideour- row), who waits re a felder ness, poned for a wincing photo- in the slips during a Test match, grapher, who grimaced as he got Then they could all circle round her dreadful fäcs Into focus. Bho the great beast, who would thanked him in that high-pitch- execute a superb pas d'elephant, ed neroam which would disgrace What plerades! What demi any parrot-house. tours! What 'ma#inades! What
London Express Servico,