IF

THE CHINA MAIL, TUESDAY, APRIL 25, 1961.

WOMANSENSE

Shirley

YOU'RE

ALWAYS LATE, I'LL BET

IT'S THE MAN'S

FAULT ..

HOUSEHOLD HINTS

NTS JE!

Lord's page Lord's

MOST men think hatching punctuality out of a woman is an impossible

task, whereas women (like me anyway) spend a good proportion of their lives trying to point out that they would never be late if it were not for all the man-made obstacles in the getting ready race.

The only time a woman has no handicap is at birth, for no gynae- cologist has yet proved boys arrive earlier than girls. Take a look at an average couple, preparing for an evening out.

Ha a pity that twin baths, unlike beds, are in the minority. It's a hundred to one that man Koes to the tub arst, which n lead he'll rarely gives him lose-unless the phone inter- rupts despite the fact he'll take 15 minutes to soak to his wife's maximum five,

After the water-jump. the obstacles ON the COLLESC Rel worse....while she alruggles along with the bathtowel, he la yelling out for his cuminks, s when the dias located them, and attempling with difficulty to silde still damp legs into nylons, he is there agam pushing snows cuffs under her nose for aid in fastening the wretcher things.

Zip stuck

JUST when her zip has stuck

JUST

"It's extraordinary how the nicest

husband can change into the

smuggest prig when he looks at his watch and says, "Good heavens,

aren't you ready yet?"9

home. *"Too late," said the and that is, of course, being buller-but then I should think too curly. That is unforgivable. this type of admonishment extreme,

19

I don't dole out even a re-

to Cuenta late primand

for drinks, but if they're late for

THE AFFLUENT

and things couldn't be dinner, a ruined meal is sufl HOARDERS

worse, man decides his jacket clent punishment,

dld need pressing after all and it's her fault for not persuading him two hours ago when the subject enme up." Now, grum- bling he says it will have to do. Watch-glancing beglos and it's extraordinary how the nicest husband can change into the smuggest prig when he looks

Finally, when is it vital to be on time?

THEbout 420

scene was brilliant INTERVIEWS THE AT MOST

perhaps these that

people, (except stressed "lack of convention excluding the orchestra, sat

the city, vae. required" in

(when down in splendour for the columna) LAST DATES

Lord the dinner to honour the breaking finally you're whole thing off-the sooner the Mayor of London. better for both); MEETING

TRAINS 'worst

slipped into 400 or so pockets ference and was front page or handbags.

nows.

Afluent face smiled happily, At intervals over the next few but a few reproachful glances years, unless Mama Gabic is came my way as my plale went firm, we can expect to Soc pictures of his pregress with back into the kitchen with my own personal "Femme Crino- captions commenting on his luc" ating mournfully

likeness or otherwise to Papa. mere puddle of inaccessible cream. I felt no need of my

of a What chance has he

in a

(the line with the Family heirlooms glittered plastic doll, but why did the happy anonymity and, who

reputation alo

her

BE FIRM,

more particle

of

are

at his watch and says: "Good heavens, aren't you ready yet?

has a nervously Here I am waliing ogatis...."

round aristocratic others? habit of making you look a fool necks, sensitive highly strung

Just one The room looits like the men's by arriving unexpectedly to the appetites picked at out of season department at C and A after minute); DINNER PARTIES,

the British banquel with guests behaving speaking, January sale, the looking glass particularly if you know there's digestibles in fact a typical proof, I suppose, that generally

natural hoarders? but still In a typleat

to my" reveals seams that are still no Frenet cook proud of vertical and hair that hasn't had soufles AND WEDDINGS ( mind, extraordinary way when

This it came to the sweet course. its necessary back-combing. But get a good seat, of course. there's nothing for it but to go 1's the last time her man will doesn't apply to the bride....

"Femmes Crinolines" it was look at his watch without called and cach guest received nagging). This, of course, is concentrat-

a luminous ice-cream, topped ingt de punctuality at home--If

a grinning plastle I'm rather bored with all this with

Crinoline skirt made my average couple were visiting excessive punctuality at

sal whose another average couple, they time, outside the boolding offler regular creamy indentations all few

couldn't care tess if their quests at Covent Garden Opera House the way round. arrived a few minutes late-and and on Aldermaston Walks, but would probably be quite IL put it down to the plenie streak

latent in all of us. leved.

alter a few cream crackers with and spread them thickly

cheese. Brown grated

them uncle the grill for a minutes, then put a small knob -of-butter on-top of each. This makes a quick and delicious savoury to serve to unexpected puesta..

Ji is not advisable to altempl to wash a down quilt at home. As the cover is down-proof, 11 is almost impossible for the filing to be dried and acrated once i Ins become soaked. If the

at once.

Barred!

E question of when to be late and when never to be

Is an extremely varied one.

It's just a lot of "bunktuality'

cover is solled the best plan is to be on the dot at a cocktail

to have it professtonally cleaned.

naucer

dry-party. In fact, I was brought up

Succer

To 'frost glasses so as to give the right appearance to cold drinks, have rendy a containing lemon juice and a Containing emulated sugar. Dip the rim of ench glass first into the lemon Julce, then Into sugar. Then chll the glasses. When Alling the glasses, pour the cold drinks into them only up to within an inch of the frostedrim..

to believe it was inconsiderate to be on tine-that ten minutes settle and the canapes to de- to allow the potato crisps to

freeze was always accepted gratefully but, beware, this as I found out just recently does not apply to all households.

doll Mrs

GABLE

LADY ✪ LUCK

your

CHINA MAIL

horoscope

TUESDAY, APRIL 25

AQUARIUS (January 21- February 19): You may be called na a witness by a mere acquaintance. If you can help, don't refuse.

PISCES (February 20-March 20): You will get twice as much pleasure out of w hobby if you share it with someone equally keen.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): You will return to your work with renewed zest after a pleasant meeting with friends over lunch,

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Unicas you can fully justify n decision which affects others, you ought not to act without consult- ing them.

GEMINI

(May 21-June 21): Your strong sense of responsibility will count favour heavily in your when your promotion comes up for consideration.

|CANCER (June 22-July 21): If you are asked for your expert opinion, give it cure- ful thought, as your answer may well be considered decisive.

knows, he may want it. Family circles everywhere look for

dad-Ronald Armstrong-Jones apparently walled anxlously to LEO signs that junior is taking after

of athletic prowess see signs

A from son Tony, Aly Khan was disappointed that during his life- time Karim lacked Interest In the racing world and many tycoons have pushed a balance sheet into unwilling hands.

In this case not just a family circle but the whole world will be walling for J.C.G. to emulate THERE ought to be a law someone that tragically he can cele- never know. I hope Mamia Gable realises that problem and Already ot two looks to a future, away from

From my good-position against baby

THERE

could sce all over the room brities. these le figures (estimated

There is only one social crime cost a few cents each) being weeks old John Clark Gabla the past. worse than being horribly late plucked out to be surrepililously gave his first Press

con-

-(London Express Service).

STORIES FOR BOYS AND GIRLS

All About Flying

-Chirpie Tells Shadons It's Like Swimming→

By MAX TRELL

cating y breakfast," said Chirple. He ained his beak at the special big crumb for

Invited to a casual cocktail at 8,39 by a member of the Londonderry family and arriving breathless in the Easter 66 AS SOON as he comes I'm second time.

rain at 0,50, I was barred entry "AS SOON us he comes I'm

al the door of the historic the Shadow

JACOBY ... BRIDGE

TODAY'S hand is one of my

favourites and has appeared

in the column before, so I apologise in advance

to those readers who remember It.

I was North and Mrs Jacoby was South. We were playing a rubber bridge match against two very good players, so good they were giving us П small Handicap. In those days the vulnerable grand slom bonus was 2,250 points and needless to say well worth scoring.

We were playing the last rubber of the match and after the first round of bidding it was obvious to me that Mrs Jacoby would not be allowed to play hand below seven spades. the

เร

WEST

AG

NORTH 4AQ034

+3

•AQJD43

4 None

J 105 +076 4AJ4542

EAST

43

Boy with the

Turned-About Name, raid to his sister Hanici.

So the moment Chirnic-Who- Was-A-Sparrow alighted on the window sill and folded his wings and got ready to rat the broad crumbs set out for him, Kauf sald:

all at once I remembered about

the erumbs on the window sill.

I wasn't tou

there. Now

Aren't

sure they'd

Be

anef Then they

"Sometimes we mitted Handd.

forget," ad-

"And som tienes the wind the blows

The crumbs away,” sald Knart.

This time Ilanid put out her hand and covered the cruma. In fuct, she covered all the crumbs. Chirple jumped back.

Feels hurt

"Anyway," Chirple went on, of thought. I might as well take look and see for myself. So I said 'So long to the Pigeons

"Didn't yet tell them where

2-15

you were Kelng. you selfsh "I'll tell you all I know about "Say, what is this anyway. Bird?" Henid naked, shaking flying," Chirple told Shadows. pala?" he asked in a hurt voice, her finger in front of Chirple's "I'm hungry. Let me cat first beak, "Chirple, how does it feel to and answer your questiza sec-

und."

10

By"

AKQD80

+2

KQ 1093

SOUTH (D)

AKJ 10752

#72

◆K 100

07

North and South vulnerable

North East South West Pass

14 W 7

Pass

Pass

Pass

Pass Opening lead—♣ A

The obvious way would be to

It also acerned reasonable to mark her with the king of dia- monds 43 part of her four- mpade bid so my problem to find a way of stopping a

seven bld six hearts over West's five heart lead against spade contraet.

hearts and then go on to seven spaden if East and West went to seven hearts.

CARD Sersek♦

Q-The bidding has been:

I deokled that that was n trifle too obvious, West was one

of the two or three best players

North East Houth West of that day and would not fall

1

3.

PAED 14

Раби

You, South, hold:

Pok

AKJÕUS VK31 SABNE SO

What do you do?

OP

for

such motheaten strategy

I aimply Jumped right to

seven spades.

Of course, I was lucky,

Woot

Suddenly stopped

"Answer the question and est spond." ilanid said

sternly.

Chirpie had his eye on a cor- For a second Chiryle looked

| tain large bread crumb. He

was hungry. He was just about as it he was going to take to pick up the bread crumb in peek at Hanid's hand. But he he suddenly changed his mind. Ile burst out his beak when stopped.

chirping.

"Tell

exclaimed

"Like a big ecran of water,

"Like water!" them!" exclaimed Knart and Humid. Chirple. "Pigeons can eat like Elephants. I don't tell them about my breakfast. No, sir! So And the wind is like the cu 1 turned into the wind and rents that run worked my wings and lurped

und-"

Sounded surprised

"Okay," he said. "You win. "Just a minute!" cried Knart, Knor had been paying sune-

into the wind? thing. 1 wasn't until this in- I'll tell you all I know about "You turned stant that Chirpie understood Bing. what he was anyag.

He let out a shrift chirp amazement.

"What?" he exclaimed.

Kaart repeated the question.

But I won't do either What's that?"

much good. of you characters You won't be able to fly any of more than a plane."

"Now that's a funny thing,

this way and that way and sometimes go up and sometimes sweep down and sometimes to spinning found and round. And if you go fly- ing with the wind when

you start, you get swept along tog Info the fast. But if you fly wind, why it's just like, just Hke. Just.

This time Chirpie didn't know he A- all right," said Chirpie, sound- exactly what to say so ing surprised himself at what nolly said: out chirping he had just hald. bursi

"You know. when you walk on the ground Knart and Hanid waited until you thing the rir is is jus

nothing." he was qulet, then they ex-

And he sane mure.

they

"Isn't it?" asked Hank.

And Knart sakl

How does it feel?

"I heard you the first time, plained that they knew they pal," said Chirpic. He was never could fly because tough city Bird. But he wasn't didn't have any wings nearly as tough as he sounded. "How does it feel to fly? Il feels fine. I

recan. 1

never even thought about it.

Chirpio's question

"But Just the sune," said Knarf, "we'd like to know what it feels like."

sald

Same as swimming

"I guess to like sliding up- hu ona sied. The wind slips under your wings and

up you

Eu."

"Of course It's nothing. It's

Kdarf, "y- "I guess," said just air. You can't grab it, or in the wit must be like hold it. You can't even me " swimmbug in the water."

Feels liko water

"Sure, pal, that's how it is,' nald Chirple, "Flying's lite awimming, and swimming's like "That's what's so funny about flying, and nothing's like a win- Hanid, "How does it feel to walk?” "For instance,"

erumbi ho asked Knart.

"how did it feel when you were it," said Chirple. "That's how it dow all full of bread flying here a few minutes ago seems to be when you're on the when you're hungry!"

ground, walking around or just "Why-I mean-it tegla fine, for the breed crumbs?" A-Dld four no-trump to check happened to hold the ace of too, I guess," stainmered Kaart.

standing. But when you're fy- for sees. If North shows two clubs, but it is quite possible 11e had never thought about Honid lifted her hand a little ing, air feels like, it feels like out laughing, and Chirple burs

that he would have opened a how it felt to walk any more so that Chirple could get an- Chirple paused. club anyway, Of course, after than Chirple had thought about other look at them. that the alam was lay down, how it felt to y. Mis Jacoby drew trumps ezdi. ditcarded her

„Kors you will bid six bearis. -

TODAY'S QUESTION

North bids fivo spades to show thres aces, 3What do you do now? Answer TomorTOW

diamonds.

hearte una

my

Then Knart and Hanid bursi

He tried to out chirping, and Hanid took think what air really felt like her hand off the bread crumbs wilen he was flying in it.

and Chirple didn't fly and he didn't swim and he didn't walk "Well," he said, "I was otrnd-

Then he said excitedly: "I lie just stood still and pecked "And now, if you don't mind, Ing on the corner talking to a

his breakfast downi I'll get down to the businem of couple of Pigeons I know, when know) It feels like water!"

VIRGO (August 22- September 22): Don't bo too sceptical about a pre- position promising quick profits on a small invest- ment. It may be quite feasible.

LIBRA (September

24-

October 22): A neighbour's behaviour will disappoint you, and a cooling off of your friendly relationship is inevitable.

SCORPIO. (October 23- November 21); Your at- tempt to administer a re- primand will

carry loss weight if you lose your temper.

SAGITTARIUS

(November 22-December 21); If you have been the victim of a shabby trick don't dwell on it, or you will only suc- ceed in hurting yourself more.

CAPRICORN (December 22- 20): An old January friend neede your sym- pathetle support. Don't make things harder for him by being critical.

(July 22-August 21): YOUR

at worrying situation home will be suddenly cleared up. to the great re- lief of the entire family.

LUCKY COLOUR: If today is your birthday, look out for a combination of CERISE and BLACK. It ought to bring you luck.

Rupert and the Paper-fall-35

Rupert bursts out laughing at his pal. Poor old Algy" he cries. "I clean forgot about you, but you've got the best present of the fot. Without it we couldn't have beaught all the others. Look, this Isn't it. aled is for you. beauty!" Algy grips the cords in

delight and pulls it. "It's grand 1" cries the little Pug. "Oh. I do hope we have some snow before spring comes." Then Rupen worn to take his new car home, but before he can start a sudden shout from Algy makes bim pause and look round.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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