Page G
Jak and
George
IT is with some aston-
ishment that
this
column announces that its artistic half, one Jak, will shortly be appearing with all the physical at- tributes of Rock Hud- son, plus a touch of Tarzan around the pec- toralis major and the inter- costalis externus,
With a bit of luck, we migh even have had him looking like Marilyn Montor and/or Ava Garaner. Only the regrestable substitution of a green card fur a pink one brought this during a trustiating tull- prospect to stop.
Full credit
But this is no time to be Dippant. Full credit to Jak fur facing up to the fact that, as of
now, his shape leaves something whether that to be draired.
shape be viewed from the front. the back. the side, er trom
greatest available distance.
1, at least, can feel for Having myself been
The
him.
blessed with rather more prepæssessing have A Lain- proportions. radely sympathy for my Less well endeared colleague, aml ( Histoned with tolerance and affection when he confessed that 10 look he, too, would like human.
in- Immediately, I caused quiries to be made in the world of science, as a result of which Jak is shortly to be re-shaped, re-modelled re-designed and re- ball like nobody's business.
The Body Beautiful awaits him by courtesy of the experts up Tarzan's torso; who tuned made Monroe's chassis immortal and ensured that Zsa Zsa Gabor shall never crumple where she should most assuredly curve.
Perfection
In short, I took Jak's peculiar problems to two gents abounding it physical perfection blossoming in London.
J
NDW
THE CHINA MAIL MONDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 1960.
In search of the body beautiful
..for JAK!
Their_reputations are impec- cable. One is ALIT es-marine who once wanted to be a mum ster, to which end he filed two buckets with concrete, cemented them to a length of s-pipe, and started throwing the lot around until wiser courses and a couple of hernias prevally
The other finished 15th in the
and
at their ing steel equipment
isponat, they face Jak's future branely, if not with confidence,
Recovermg
quickly
the initial professionally from shock of my colia.gue's appear- anco, tin instructor explained were 2,146 known that there methods of improving the human If necessary. shape, and that, Mister California Contest they were quite prepared to behind, he admits.. 14 idiot think up a 2,147th in the present gorillas.
From these humble beginnings propor- sprang the splendidly tioned chaps who
have sworn to make a man of Jak or bust their biceps in the attempt. Having re-furbished the hip lines of half Hollywood, and with £15.000-worth of gleam
Anthony Lejeune asks:
now
rather interesting case.
True, the bone structure was no1 immediately discernible, but much could be done if only Jak would appreciate the importance of body-building. tuning, dictless slimming, proportioning control.
and
What did the Ministry
JUST
how efficient is the Ministry of Defence. now, four years after the Suez crisis? Whatever one's political views about Suez, there can be no denying its military lesson...
With UNO round
If With our slowness and our necks and the Russians indecision which brought us to rattling rockets, any local disaster at Suez.
military action must
our
be
four There have beon completed quickly, prefer- Improvements since then. ably within 48 hours.
kon
and flexibility is Mobilly what we most need. Lord MAT!
of Lambeth has admitted that his Government might have intervened at Abadan," but it would have taken six weeks to build on adequate force.
blk
from
4
The idea was to have Jak finish the course looking like Jayne Mansfield's husband, not
ke Jayne Mansfeld.
COM-
But it sure
-a5
ALEXANDER THOMSON
A Fortune out
of Fashion
MODEL girls with practised elegance walked
round a fashion salon as we talked about the textile business.
There was Maureen in a dress called Bonjour. Daphne in a cute little number named Amour. And many other dazzlers, too.
Said Mr Kenneth Boardman: "I believe 1981 is going to be another wonderful your for Lan- cashire.
"Demand from the Taxhlon buyers for next spring aud summer Is alrendy that."
This puts Boardman himself in the millionaire class, although you would never think so, He Is such a homely sort of man.
Yet he has a 40 per cent stake in the company. And at present showing stock market orices his holding
is worth £1,500,000.
Down-to-earth
Kenneth Boardman. 46, 's
So for expansion, has taken place out of carnivwer, which
Is much the best way of doing things.
We
head of the £3,000,000 Board. What happens next? man Marden group which has are not going to stand still" just pleased the Stock Exchange said Kenneth Boardman, "I am by raising its half-year's looking at half-a-dozen other to see how they dividend from 72 per cent to concems
would fit into our group, 9. per cent,
He is a down-to-girth Lan- cashire businessman who saw better chances in fashion than In cotton spinning and weaving.
For . six years, now he has been chasing those opportuni- ties. And trading prodis of his firm have risen from £55,000 to £484,000.
an
"But we are only interested if the management is good. Any other way only leads to head- oches."
I asked about the bird's, oyd view Berets of the rest of Lan- cashire's textile industry.
He said: "So far as I can see, there is no sign yet of any let- up in its boom. Order books are stronger than since 1851.
Improved
STO
If Boardman Marden were to consolidate its Is, shares into be. form, they would probably be investment rank- given higher ing.
"This
JERT,"
whispered Boardman AS
attractive brunette twirled in front of 129, bo nearer "I hope they will £700,000.
"Most people, you know, are fooled Jak. Hel preliminaries Thèse We were handed a pink Pro-
than "Pront
much clothes conscious
margina Chart, then gres
hurriedly pleted, we moved to the murmur smiled happily at the shiny-more
For example, cloth substituted a green one. Pink, it of soft musle into the gymna bright appliances that are going ever before, I started with better, too.
Their purenis then that was selling for 20 pence a was explained with merry sium, and I wish to go on record to shitl 12 inches from his hips teenagers.
followed their example. Business yard a year ago is fetching 34 Laugh, was for ladies, and that, with the remek that I do not to his shouldere or else.
pence now." would never do, would it
care how many gymnasiums We turned a couricous bead, is fantastically good."
Boardman's story is rather of course, nover
we passed the seen-you've you have
He came out of seen one like this. Even the ladies bust-developer (it looks fantastic, too.
major blood on the floor turned cut lo like an ironing board) but were the Army as a Gunner
un as a cloth encouraged to make detailed in 1946, and set he carpet.
examinations of the universal merchant.
Eight years later, he merged The receptionist, who used to hip and thigh machine, the leg
Arm of ¤ middle-weight for extender, the abdominal boards, his business with a
and weavers, England and St Pancras, accom- the vibrator belts, the jungle cotton spinners panied us on tip-too. Ceiling pulley
the and took over control. and naturally
He closed down three of his decorous light latissimus dorst encourager. laments shed on walls of ebony and coral But enough of the idie fancy, ew group's six mills, and began
went to see our dividend cover mirrora multiplied every Jat's the boy for jerks. My buying dress factories instead.
As profits increased, he bought increased from twice to 214 htful glitter of the stamless steel part in this deal is simple. All
Now there are more of them. equipment.
times," he told me. female form I have to do is to find a worth in the Boardman Marden set- divine rogaled us from a mural while pedestal
muscle-develop mount the magnificent bundle of p, including the Mornessa and ing weights were painted pink muscle that is to be the new and gold: Nobody mentioned Jak. the word "sweat."
Astonishing
that
Earnestly, swiftly, methodi cally, with never a hint these astonishing contours were beyond hnan ken or under standing the experts jotted down Jak's measurements on the chart, and swore never to reveal them to a living, soul.
sa 110 more
1, too, gave a similar under- taking, and can muscle- than that my colleague's vital
an outline re- statistics revealed weight not dissimilar to that of a banjo a Chianti bottle or a bed-pan.
box
..even the
Gymnasium? Confronted with this salon, this sybaritio work- aut
Jack Solomons parlour, would have rushed in a scream- ing frenzy to his fish shop.
of Defence
Suez?
would be any better next time Suez, specifically is anybody's guess.
TWO: The Navy now has a special Commando-carrier; only one, but it is a start. Bulwaric, already serving in the Far East, can carry one Commando of 500 to 800 men permanently and a second
我 Commando cmer-
ONE: As a nan from the said, our Ministry of Delence Joint planning machinery is fur better. But against this remains gency. the old doubt; soldiers, sailors, and airmen can do nothing un- less the politicians give them clear orders, Whether that
Albion is due to be refitted Es
to
learn
heavy fighting broke out in the
on which to
Something like a circus... or possibly the Dairy Show.
Marcus businesses.
As things are, they yield 5 per cent on the basis of last year's dividend of 27 per cert,
I asloed Kenneth Boardman
about this year's chances "
But I would still hope to pay at least 35 per cent, if trading continues as at present,"
Just then, model girl Maureen was back again, as Boardman's fashion show went on.
"I decided" he told me, "that our best policy was to get much
WOEDEN nearer
Now we are really getting into our sildo.
Over the past six years, with I noticed thai thila, time; the
gown she ving weariṭig the firm's shares have climbed· called Galety. Very fitting,
-London Express Services?- from 101⁄2d to Ss 6d.
GEORGE WHITING Kenneths Boardman in control,
-(London Express Service).
IT'S NOT A GLAMOROUS
LIFE FOR THESE PILOTS!
NOT
News in the air- by
all the RAF's Yemen. Our forces would then pilots fly glamorous be very heavily strained indeed. 700 m.p.h. fighters, big The longer range and greater 600 m.p.h. V-bombers or speed of modern transport air-
world as "airline" fliers James Stuart go cruising round the
relearn forces go further. But in other craft can certainly make small wartime techniques of working ways our position has worsened, with the Army. Its function is เจ transport the Strategic Reserve.
Against this an uncomfortable doubt remains. If the Strategic Reserve is to be effective, the R.A.F. must be able to move it immediately.
But transport planes are not earn their
a Commando-corrier next year. kept standing by; the Treasury And some time in the doubtful requires them to futur a "dockship" or "assault keep by constant freighting. ship" will be added. Two of
The R.A.F. approves because these ships can then be kept East it trains crews and accustoms of Suez.
people to scaling these planes come and go. In theory, aircraft Against this is the state of could always be brought from the present Amphibious Warface somewhere by
the time tho Squadron, which is the Navy's troops were assembled. But no congregation of landing craft. one outside the RAF seems very This squadron, now at Aden. confident about it. bas been streamlined and
refitted since Sucz-but its ships side of Suez was grossly mily- FOUR: The public relations ate all four years older.
handled. That will not happen
THREE: R.A.F. Transport again.
Commatid has been
beyond all recognition.
improved
Comcis
and Britannias can operate at
for greater distancce than the
The strain
Hastings and Vallante we used The Army has a new radio for
Space for reporters
at Suez, find, being much faster, the use of newspaper corres can perfum two or three mes pondents.
many misslots. The Beverley will be reserved in the drat wave transport altcraft will soon be of froon carriors, Correspond- ente pocred flation cards have been distributed to area.. com- manders all round the world.............
supplemented powerful Argosy.
by the
The doubt
more
We are losing our OVETSCAS bases, in which men could be trained, acclimatised, and held ready.
And
across great
swathes
neutralis!
arc
of the globe uur alterati being blocked by nations which will not allow them to over-fly.
The needs
I suggest that Britain three big defence Boods.
of Transport Command:
For two years now the men of 1072. It would use
built 1.18 prop-jet airplanes. BEA is to extend its present
London-Prague service
Hungarian capital.
10
SOUGHT AFTER
the
British girls are still sought after by airlines in the USA Latest airline to send recruiters. of the long to Britain 1s United, one
No. 78 Squadron have been runways made necessary by the America's biggest domestie. based in Aden doing local flying big American jets of today, operators.
In their 100 m.p.h. Scottish- but Twin Pioneer airplanes,
Incidentally "GRE" heads
the organisation that has
Just
Gov-
a
The squadron's pilots claim to been given the £350,000 be the "oldest and slowest" in crament contract to prepare
for a supersonle the RAF. Their average age is design study 35, compared fighter sqmdron.
with
22 in
The Twin Pioneers, which
are
sicliner.
FROM BUDAPEST
☛ WHAT à remarkable story is
the growth of passenger flying since the worl" Told in a hit- Nine million people shelliit used the world's major airlines in 1945, and 18 million the fol lowing year.
has take off and land in about the
The New chink in the Iron Cur- length of a football field,
recently announced. ideally suited aircraft for the tain: The state-owned Hungarian Agures for 1959 were 97 million. more Aden landing strips. They are airline is to start a service from These do not take into account civi air used for troop transport, recon- Budapest to London on April 1. the massive Russian, naissance, casualty evacuation it will use (of course) Russian network, nor the Chinese.
London Express Service). and all other kinds of flying.
We need to spend money on conventional forces. Government expenditure 05 whole should doubtless be cut rather than raised, but this is not the place to cut it.
We need to give the Services more confidence in their poll- tical musteris.
We need a new concept of global strategy to meet a new
situation. We political
shall have to find a way of keeping small striking forces
In two years they have carried over 10,000 passengers and 3,000,000lb. of freight.
DOWN TO EARTH
MR GEORGE OGDEN has to go into the. sext-door garden Amid all tre droom-talk of
to clean two gable windows of his home at Newton-le- affliners whizzing Willows, Lancs. Now the council, which owns the next-door supersonic per-acrom the Atlantic in a couple garden,, is demanding 58. a year rest from Mr Ogden for using
of hours comes some down-to- its iand every time he cicats his windows.
manently nearer to their pos 'sible targets,
(London Express Service);
QUOTE
earth language from the chief of
the British' Alteraft Corporation,
Sir George R. Edwards,..
WARMER Louis Rochas was blown out of his house near. Nimes, Southern France, in ». zas explosion. A rescuer rashed in “GRE." is always matter-of-from the road. The rescuer's name: Guy Fauques,
Mct, and the man who designed the Valiant bomber and ↑ the Viscount airliner (among a long line of others), he ueritally kiws what he is talking about w
FUE only plece of property. Usted among the £175 acts of a master of foxhounds at his public examination Tit, when and the planning and modernisation has been done,
bankruptcy was a hunting lorn, valued at £2. The examination of 28-year-old Dennis Browin, Master of the Hatherley: Páritkárs the ble query is still the simple
He says "We do, not yet, khow Hunt, Devon, was closed. We shall still have nothing one: Are we strong enough? E
by an offteini after a con- how to build a Mach 3 striiner to equal the great American
Duncan Gandys who planned forence recently to plan an (three times the speed of sound Globemaster
COUNCIL onani in Norwich picked up hĩa bubblóLE; which
An appeat, fund fde flood victims at 1983 mph of any sort, let Affed it over hie garden fence, and parked is on the lawn. such
sturation na PL
our post-conscription roared into Beleitt during the he told me that the Linaire town of Husn-alone a vertical take-off middel.
we should never gain be fada camile Lebanon crisis. But though its with an operation as largo de UITE obviously, the hun reflection of that nefuler does!
"I console myself, with the
committes denied to fill hit to keep the one th lifting capacity may not com Suez without American help. Qdreds of families we have anybody else," he adds.
suffered will need more finan- wyjechan
caused they
parm with America's, our Tr
port Command in new probably the fastest in the world
that a fuft?'''
That may be true, but to ind, it aboma a dangerous assumption help in the mate: cic Cleorge thinks that?"If we Suppare for instancers last give. Detalls Wraa101 -being, tried very hard" wegilght And the A a group!" "Kam Benki erkälloj šinos Katya and at the wadonge thealer), znant will be made.
vormcil“garage in future. “
DEMEMBER that drunken duck hunter in Russia, who thot down's place and got afght years, Juli? Well in Beeply saber moment, He appealed. Just an honest mistakam- he ha