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THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 1900.

ཏེ་་ས་་་་་ཏ་ཏ་་་ ་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་་

SATURDAY MAGAZINE

JAK and GEORGE

this week take an Olympic look at Rome...

Rome.

TF there is one thing I cannot

stand it is pessimism, and I would like to take this opportunity, on behalf of the working classes, of registering a resolute protest at the defeatist attitude now being adopted here by the Great Britain team authorities in the Olympic Games.

Nothing so becomes a man as modesty, but you can overdo the shrinking violet lark. And Sandy Duncan, Chef de Mission of the British contingent, is hereby ac- cused of lowering our national prestige to an ebb unknown since America beat us at football.

Sandy's sin is largely one of accountancy, but it is none the leas heinous on that score. Nor is it any use claiming that he means well.

Here, briefly, are the sordid details.

This man.

once an Inter- national sprinter and a double Blue at soccer and athletics for Oxford, has so far forgot- ten bis proud keritago as lo have old in only six bottles of the right stuff with which to celebrate the Olympic gold medals about to be won by his fellow countrymen and countrywomeIL

Six measly magnums.' It is a poor, snivelling compliment to the youth of the nation. Men have been sent to salt mines for 10es,

But that, I fear, is not the full extent of the Duneen shame.

Pink pills

Six

CAMPO PECOPILA ENTRATA

HON

VOLITATE

PERICOLOSE

"I DID MY BEST TO GET JAK IN OUR TEAM BY HAVING HIM SHOW HIS POLE-VAULT PROFICIENCY!"

bottles! That's

all we've

got to celebrate victory

our bounden duty, today re- hot climate. Pretty weak, I moved part of the evidence from thought, the British quartermaster's store at the Olympic village,

I

is true. there are some mighty strange comestibles being this Olymple

As a versatile athiele, Jak just reception centre, insisted on us has to be seen to be believed. leaving personal documents by way of security, a situation de- His all-round achievements manding resource and quick my havo escaped

the thinking. Olymple

but record books,

from

14 lies before me as I write dished up one of the 7,500 pink pills im- village from biltong,to bully not for nothing is be known But we made it, and Tina and ported to prevent the united beef and from tinned apricots to to the inner circles of sport Maria are now acting as custo- as the Pentathlon Prodigy. dians of a return half to Earls- stomachs of 338 British athletes tripe in stufato which I under- rumbling amid the ruins of stand is the

Beld and a stern letter Roman iden of

Obstacle ancient Rome,

tossing the Jok's bank manager. stewed tripe.

cuber, pontoon and most other come pretty Confronted with his act

It is also true that some of our athletic pursuits sabotage, Duncan took another Italian hosts like to treat the easily to Jak. pinch of snuff and sought refuge artichokes thele careopfo And there was the famous

of

races,

For defence

Once pusi the squads of white

the rest of the world for an Olympic loop.

headquarters,

in the British they were talking about cricket and discussing who should drink the last remaining bottle of beer,

In trouble

And Jak? Well, 'I did my best

to get him in our national team, even to the extent of having him show his pole-vault pro- Helency over an adjacent six- looi six-inch wire fence,

Unfortunately, It turned out to be the fence that keeps the orcam of the world's women No, indeed, this alien Scot, in vulgar abuse-inferring that alle quidia as though they were occasion, of course, when he hit

athletes in a kind of Olympic not satisfied with estimating our idiota who talked and wrote in need of the same kind of his peak as anchor man to the coated policemen, we wandered Pardab. Olymple chances at a low miser- drivel would be made to swallow lubrication as a cricket bat, Wimbledon Ladies tug-of-war, awhile among the bolting as

quarts, has actually had a very diferent kind of pill if

phalt, plucked a willing petunia, When I left, Jak's Intentions the effrontery to accuse his he had his way,

Nevertheless, I stale again Having got the lad pretty it and eventually found number 25 word being questioned with team of being susceptible to no

that Sandy Duncan has culpably on pasta asciutta and other via Finlandia, where the Bri- some heat and much gesticula- fewer than 1,500 collywobbles, Then he side-stepped fato fur- confused the Abre of the British spaghelli assortments, I felt the fish team are housed in a roomy tion by three policemen four stomach aches, and rumblings ther denigration of the great tum and the future of the British least I could do was to put him set of terracotta brick flats set Corablatert, and a Bulgarian of the tun

British siomech. Something team.

at the nation's disposal, and I high on concrete stilts.

weight lifter. about the possibility of strange

may tell you I had the devil's Jak and 1, carrying out what foods having disturbing effects Why couldn't he have laid on own job getting him past the

The silts, I gather, `ore 'one But my colleague is not easily we believe to be no more than on unaccustomed innards In a six pills and 7,500 bottles

of barricades and into the Olymple other defence measure against discouraged. The last I heard of the time when the flats ore him, he had gone over to the village.

handed over to the families of Russians.

uble

Just Fancy That!

RANITE chippings and grit decorated the rock cakes T entered by Mr W. E. Jupe, of Thuraley, Surrey, in the village flower show. On them he put a card

..

bubbly?

·

The prodigy

-

Fort Knox solf could hardly Italian income tax officials.. be more rigorously defended.

Next door thirty or so large George Whiting Tina and Maria, ¿wo culo- Americans were drawing up Incidentally, It' was only by accident that Jak and I stumbled eyed algnore in the blue glass team tactics designed

the crime,

Actually we had gone to the village, set in a sea of swelter- Ing tar by the banks of the Tiber, to offer Jak's services to

to throw

-London Express Service).

Gigantic new U.S. rocket

describing them as "the only genuine rock cakes." He the British teain in case Gordon auc

won a special prize for originality.

-London Express, Service).

VICKY

Chicago Go

LIBERAL

AMPHITHEATRE PLATFORM

Pirie, Dick McTaggart or Mary Bignal wasn't feeling quite up to the mark.

I

London "Kupres dirvian,

brings the

the moon nearer

From CHAPMAN PINCHER

Stockholm.

FULL details of the gigantic Saturn rockets now being built by the United States for space research and travel to the moon were revealed by Dr Wernher von Braun, the ex German rocket scientist, in Stock- holm.

The first Saturns will be nearly 190ft, long, and capable of putting nearly 20 tons into orbit round the earth-or one ton. gently on to the moon. This type is due to be fired in about four years' time.

Later veralons could put a three-man space station round the moon,, Diber Saturna could be modified to form tankers to carry fuel to these space stations, von Braun said."

From there landings on to the moon return fights will be possible,

and

Von Braun belleves that planets will be. Inhabited in, the foreseeable future. He said: "Man has been struggling to survive on this semi-hostile planet (the earth) for about a million years,

First stage successful

Why should we continue to konano him

on this globe when we have learned to create an artificial environment providing comfortable living unterwater.as,wall as in the stratosphere. and In space?”

The first stage of the. Saturn rocket har. siready been fired mugonssfully in the United

U

The Saturn

:

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