THE CHINA MAIL, WEDNESDAY, MAY 14, 1958.

THE UPPER FIFTH GIVES

ITS GENERAL APPROVAL

ESTING cars is

TEST

no job for a

Krown min. It should be left to small boys. Let one of these tousle-haired monsters loose in car and

you have unleashed EL whirlwind,

When a dashboard knob comES off in my hand I'm inclined to tut tut a little and slap it back on. But not the demons of the Upper Fifth. They promptly attack all the others, explaining all the while where the makers have gone wrong. interspers. ing savage critic- ism with involved extracts, from the Technika pages one always skips

in the instruction

manuals.

I

-by

Robert

Iriarted off with such

the cebeulbos when 1 tested

knew Riley Two-Point-Six. him of old. There was an occa- sion at the Motor Show when single-handert and with unsenil- ing them, he redued a stanillub of salesmen to rubble.

A BORED AIR

He got inter my Riley with the bored air of an expert. His

father owns its pruincest r--the,

Pathunder.

The Riicy. Two-Point-Six.

Glenton

tion you need, time much better nt watching the pored nhend. The tradentor warning light about a big as a glow-worm's

all-light and completely cured by the steering wheel."

09-

4 broded about the wheel

EL

15

D

n lot. The steering on this car iheavy, Cruising fast en good straight road problem, but in etsantry Inner and in town, my shoulders soon. began to creak.

Now for the best things about

attle too much leg room from tho buck-seat passengers,

THE FIGURES

This is a handsome cor, an -considering it will do nearly 100

miles an

hour very sop- histicated.

92

Now for performance: -—

GEAR SPEEDS: Top, miles an hour; third, 77 miles an hour; second, 55 miles bour.

fan

ACCELERATION: 0-30 miles

an bour, Sacc.;-0-80 miles un

FOR

2,039 c.c.

STIRLING MOSS asks-

Now, why can't WE make a car like this?

Dyou could buy a splendidly, trim O you remember the days when

family car for £98 10s.?

There are plenty of folk still far from middle age who can recall the showrooms glittering with chcap temptation.

such

For practically nothing down and even less a month all the freedom that a ear bestows was waiting.

And that was only in 1830.

No purchaise tax, no waiting lists. You

shiny

you will find it hard to belleve

IE:W

саг

A

The Gorman Goggo- mobil. It has four- whool indopondent suspension,

air.

cooled ongine at the rear, and can carry two adults and two children. It costs the Gormans only £275.

buair, 17.49e. The speedometer | could have your first was 2.6 miles an hour fast at within minutes, CO milles un hour.

Why has it all changed? Why hus the possession of a car, so recently Just FUEL

CONSUMPTION the matter of a little thrift, now become (uriven reasonably hard), 21 just a day dream to so many people? miles to the gallon,

Stand the edge of a main THE TECHNICAL: oud today and look at the cars. Engine, six-cylinder, overheads the stream past nose-to-tail valves, capacity,

b.p. 101 at 4.500 rpan.; sus that there is a single house in pension, front, torsion bars and Britain without its garage; that wishbones, rear, semi-elliptical. there is a single individual who Price £940.

Total including caco drive.

But the truth is very different, Lax), £1,411 75.

For many people the driving WILL IT FIT YOUR seat of a car is as far away as it the dust and terrified the cattle. in Baltain over Whe age of GARAGE? Length, 15ft. 5ito.: was when the first cluttering, What ara the feels? Well 19. A few weeks ago there space does seem to have stolen width, 501. Tim, height, 501. Ulm. Thorseless carriage churned up there are 36,000,000 people were just 4,180,531 cars on these of building a tiny cur for a little car that could be tucked

The driving

the car. The brakes are splen

the acceleration. And father, whe did. So 18

position is good couples a convinient generosity

and, apart from a ifttle roll and with a market reluctance

ruther more tyre squeal, the walk a yard nurs than

cornering admirable, ned, allow his son to drive the car to and from the garage.

made up My pantnger mind quickly. The engine wa. smooth, the gear-fever was 10-

The Bish Is far above is clazy and

the comfort. the Barge huggage

his gh

so, the instrument lay-mral Was to

god, the handbrake was most ljute he had seen,

the

I thing him sast before t

tu work with his horrid little

spaber, but I must say be was very observant.

The handbrakt is hidden be

hind the steering-wheel tund

for The moterat

Wilton

܀ La

If it's always 3 o'clock

in the morning

orang-outang blood in his family Yul kinds of unlikely facts. You may know all about YOU are probably intelligent, and knowledgeable, about'

it in a long stretch to reach

The Hy Two-Point-Six has entirely went and exhe six-cylinder engine,

The pear-hever mented

441

the floor on the right-hand side

of the driver is for 1st of the

tin pleurant to use. 1 could

motor-car engines or he able to do a crossword puzzle in flash. But do you know even some of the most simple facts about your own amitomy?

Ask yourself: Where. Is your spleen? Is it on the right or the left of your upper abdomen? Question No. 2: Where is Liver!"

"My liver?" Mr Johnson said. looks like after you've

have done with a longer one, "Well, I tell you this, doctor,

it can very well at that we when the right on the It would obstruet entry into the left."

car.

tself

The selection usually good but a chansy diy- er could ik reverse without much trouble Witen changing ch.wp to second.

I'd started this

medicat qez with Mr Johnson because he

come

io

The

with

his Own

was diagnosis. "I've got a chill on

He told

me flatly the liver," Anatomically speaking he hadn't But when it came to a clue. describing his symptoms he was must graphic.

On the whole I agree about

It

"These days I feel as if it's always three

o'clock in

the instrument panci, Mounted

in expensive polisher wond looks good,

But there are two bad faults. Your eyes have to stray a song way to lake an all the informa-

(13)

-All-in-a- doctor's

day: by

CEDRIC

CARNE

top racing driver who finds even a 10 h.p. saloon too big in town puts his finger on a blind spot in Britain's car industry.

Though catarrhal Jaundice Is common. Mr Johnson did not have it. He never had yellow ing for one thing.

That's what I said." Mr Johnson argued.

"It's a chi on the liver. It's a catarrhal liver without jaundice. Pre had it a number of times."

Evidently

road.

thing they are far too expen- Tanities If they could find what sive; secondly and mainly, they they wanted, and could afford it, are still too big.

In the motor salc-rooms, Most of the small cars being But why on earth should they made in Britain at the go to the expense of buying, moment are Junior versions of taxing, and Insuring a car of bigger models. And because of their own which is to a lesser or 1ls they suffer. They are just greater degree a copy of the one modications Instead of being that the firm provides? on entirely new conception of Think of all the

men who motoring.

drive to the station every For a long me the Con- morning on their way to their Unentala have realised the elty afees. They would hail

or

the unfilled needs of so many away in a corner of the station You ean reckon that more al Citroen, the 15ttle Flat, and maybe even

million people. There is the yard until they returned, than half of those vehicles, the Goggomobil.

left outside the perhaps even

office. two-thirds of

I am convinced that if our them, are owned by business

So would the wives who will makers net their minds to com- So what does that give fits.

nat motor to the shops in the peting, we would have some ligh Street nowadays you? The incredible truth that

thing not only cheaper but far they can, because

aven fl only about one udult in 30 OWNS

in advance

they don't car.

of these foreign fancy struggling with the steer- rivals.

ing wheel of a car much too big there. Designers must set out to far, far away from the shop they But the basic płon must be for their needs in a parking place

All that mass production In Coventry, Birmingham, Dagen

and Luton and yet,

ham. Johnson knew source

that the liver was the of his trouble.

"All right, Mr Johnson said.. diagnoses. your

"If that's what you wish to call il,"

except for comparatively few, car is just a loxury to dream about.

the Though I dik- agreed with him I didn't argue. There are a number of feeling I think this is absurd, be

saffer cause after all these years at miki infections people from that the GP never tehould not be the all-on-the-

glugerbrend of Hving. It shoul He calls it "induenza,” or an- Le just as much an accepted part other such name. "Chill on the of the household as TV. liver" will do just as well even A short trip into the country

After all, side for a picnic, or a trip to the his liver is A.L

Especially seaside suuld not be a matter of what's in a neme expation's feet much better if struggling with the children on

buses and trains » name is given to their dis- ability.

Off colour

A gimmick?

No

The price

NOW what should this cor bo like. It should cost about £275 as does the Goggamabił to the German.

meet un entirely new concept of what. The need is there,

There may be people driving. who would buy this car, squash in the family, and drive from Put they would be the exception, the end of the land to the other,

The market to meet and courage is one that has a real nerd for transport over cam- paratively short distances. gets more and more impossible As fares go up and parking

1 think it should have four- be boll wheel independent suspension economical and extremely conduir-cooled-engine at the rear.

venient.

The four-wheel Independent It's a funny thing, but every suspension means we can use one expects a racing driver sinall wheels and still

relain to go round the place la a great good road holding and braking. thundering

machine

en air-cooled engine at the bulging

this le Car would

with engine. I have used a 1 rear makes the car simpler and horse-power ear for many yeart cheaper to make; also It won't now, especially for town driving, freeze up even if you leave it I find even that too big for elly outside night, I would like driving, and I must say that to see a four-speed gear-box so when I bad a bubble car I found that we can keep economy and that wherever I wen! 1 was cer- performance with slightly less Purchase tax must, of course, lan of parking within at least pawer.

And it must have a turning

hed a Calerthel jaundice is a mild iew chain- virus infection of the Jiver smoking associated with loss of appetite, Erren! U a stiga semen opser with around? Well, feeling of fulness in the raiddle that's how [ of the abdomen just under the feel,"

cage of the ribs, and a gradual And he at yellowish apparence. tributed all

11 usually afegis adolescents

The fact is our body often This 10 A er those in fly middle life, overcomes virus infections TAKING the children to school "chill on the end the

often is before sl.tent

the latter fraukių pr- every day should be a few liver." But depressed and seedy-minded in presses itself full-blown minutes' drive, not a burden there's 110

the way Mr Johnsca described. symptoms. That is to say, people Shopping should be a pleasure Juch thing. "It's а mlid condition," 1 suffer a sub-clinical attack of and not a struggle with heavy the The liver does not cough or explained. Lle are be done some infection or another, and

loads, morning," he said. "I feel seedy sneeze, On the other hand except to take plenty of fluids while the body is in the throes And why isn't it? as a Graham Greene channeler, occasionally the liver is affected like lemonade or orange julee of its struggle against it the You know what ashtray by a virus infection. This may or glucose drinks, and

diet patient may just feet a bit off take a major share of the blame. 50 yards of my destination. lead to catarrhal Jaundice, high in carbohydrate and low colour.

But I think part of the answer But I would be happier s circle even better than a London The liver is on the right, example, an illness by no means in fat. Of course, the The spleen is on the left.

It is not uncommon for people 15 also that motor manufacturers if the real compromise could be taxi'e. should be in bed."

So would millions of My Ideal mitilature ear would in an office all to have colds, have considered the miniature found.

as a gimmick, Surely, other people.

have room for two full- headaches, and coughs except, cars

missing the And there is no point at all sized adults say, for Mr X, although Mr Xhough, they are

In the front and in car manufacturers raising the two children in the back. With doesn't escape entirely. He just biggest market of all time.

Britain What feels a bit seedy end Greene.

and argument that a baby car might this system we wouldn't even Like the others he had a dose needs badly, is a genuine small, hit their present sales,

have to take the in-laws with of the virus also, but had inexpensive car. I don't mean

from . An Kallan 0s on holiday. greater resistance against li.. at unrenilstle, Hiny little horror manufacturer actually pro- And we don't want our cir

"You could be Mr X." I said with a claim that it will do duces two baby cars with less to look like a soap-box. I

than hundreds of miles to the gallon. to Mr Johnson.

one horsepower dir must be cute even if it is not I ara thinicing of # real ference between them, and glamorous. saloon car, one with a wheel still sells of each of them, I believe that if such a car fat each corner, an engine that I have already sald that the were made it would sell In auch in't overworked, four scats anjority of cars on the roads enormous numbers that any even if two are small-and room today are owned by businesses, manutneturer would make # for same luggage.

Executives use and drive them; fortune, And we, at long last, What is wrong with the small tev would, in many cases, be- would become 1 motoring Tears being mado now?

of Iwo-car nation.

uncommon,

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"Quite right, doclor," he replied. "All the others in the office were three o'clock in the morning too. Only they didn't have headaches and coughs,"

"What then?" I asked. "They all had chills en the liver," said Mr Johnson,

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