This Funny World
MeNaught Bridicate, the Trum
BY
"Is my slip showing, dear?"
THE WAY 。
by Beachcomber
IF you are going to put your hard work is the key to lasting
hoy into the horse-duping success." business, he will require a course of tralaing.
The great burlionc Boohmer proved that the two can be combined. He bent double and sang while looking at the audiene from between his legs. It was hard work, but it varied he proceedings. I kept him out of opera, but he was in great And he demand for concerts.
Sun- was allowed to do it on
The publication of a hat of 31 drugs in se in the profession will no doubl stimulate the dupers to find drugs that are more difficult to detect. Sus pleton will increase. The eyes of the Jockey Club will be on every horse which woggles its cars days, provided that he did not 'There unduly, 06 exprit analysts will wear a false moustache.
have traced this peculiarity to ar, apparently. no low against very rare Lapp drug used to singing a serious song in an un- speed up reindeer. On the other orthodox manner on a Sunday. hand, a horse which turns and Fun at the bar runs the wrong way round the
American bars should
אן
eourse may be merely expressi. 1 SUGGESTION that stools in ing boredian with the witple atted with safety belts, to pre- iden of the race, without having vent people from falling off been doped at sil. Not long age them. show how dangerously
THE CHINA MAIL WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 18, 1957.
JACOBY ON BRIDGE
Sly Trump Play Wins For George
By OSWALD JACOBY
WEST opened the lung of
hearts. East pinyed the treg whereupon West shifted to the queen of trumps,
Generous George looked hap- pily at the queen and remarked, "I could take that all right but every day is Christmas with me and I am going let you held that trick.
As usual, George had been
giving away lec to the Eskimos,
ite hind to lose a trump trick o matter how he played the hand
WEST
NORTH
13
EAST A72
¥753
34
• AJJZ
4AQS42
QJ IO VAKQ10 +Q070
07
SOUTH (D) AKDUSS 9802
AK3
2
◆ K 10 5 4 10005
East and West vulnerable
Wesl North East Pous
PONS
Pass
Houth
14
2 d
Para
Pass 3+ Puss LA PASS Opening lead-♥ K
Pass
and he wanted to be able to diaw the adverse trumps with- out giving the defence a chance to cash more than two heart tricks.
If George had fo
That queen of spades he would have bren set Suppose he Just West played a second heart. would win and lead another trump. Now George would have no trumps left for his two Bitle bracie. If he tried to run an innocent-looking man was people Bye nowadays. Bars the clubs he would get one heart. arrested at Doncaster. He wish with very high stools will prob- | direard but West would trump ed to get a good tip and said to ably distribute amall parachutes a friend. "Give me the dope." A so that undersized drinkers may police officer óverheard him.
bate out and reach the flour in Foulenough and Vita safety. Another useful device would be the ejector. By (JAPTAIN SOULENOUGH, Be Pressing a button the burn Con Piret the rowdy drinker least eligible bactelor FI from his reat into somme Londons is still courting the wealthy Vita Brevk
Brevis
"When-
ever he proposes to me," she raid, "kaw he bar had a bad day at the race. What attracts me to hdm in his funkness, Que day 1ked him If he would want buy no I were poor. He said: "That would de pend on Newmarket. Lewes, and so on.' And once lig salt to nut Would you marry me if I were rich? salt, of course I would, if I loved him, 'Well, there you ure! sait, love you, and although you're rich. Td marry you
If my wealth tomorrow. wouldn't stand in your
CATTIRE,
CROSSWORD
10
#
20
Khu
10
why should your wealth sland in mine?' He certainly make, my other men friends sum voy chall
In England now
THE Languid Look for dogs is on the way out. The new shazzy, slewy, spozzy hell vor- nish, K9, will make your dog look a million dollars. Like the
Killer
(2)
i, Malevi alm.
in and be able to cash one more heart.
Should Grange simply play at the trumps West would win the third lead and set the fad twu tricks. If George went righ after clubs West would trump the third lead mul promptly knuck out dummy's are of dis- monds.
WOMANSENSE
I Put The
mutis year I enst
awny
around 20 unwanted pounds of Amanda Mar- hall, with the help of a diet, a
and the doctor bracing inspiration of a younger sister who thought it was About Time.
Postgraduate slimmers take as keen an interest in new methods us those of unregenerate chunky ladies who have still to be con- verted, and I experienced The thrill known only to avid method-collectors discovering in Reduce in Record Time (a book and a set of three LP records Living Method Course by Evelyn Loewendahl)* a new system of reducing under instructions from the stern voice of conscience on the record-player. Just in time for Christmas, too.
(11
P060
some
-to
Page G
Hips On The Turntable
get in
sart oľ n
trim for Christmas
relielant bat already- by AMANDA MARSHALL
shape and lone on the reduced nuss. The synt pathetle doctor who supervised my regime advocat- ed swimming every afternoon, followed by Ice rest and carly-le-bed. Finbby, he said,
one up
of lexs lovely newly-slim
and It with a nusty dropping
And i. thed, was what I was. Thinking malevolently of the ietsured life with afternoon swimming
und ม ulee rest lently remarked "And folly food luck.")
pleiding
you
yנם
t
results by lots of Darby the next day's amazing Living Method activity eyebrow-raising, eyelid-squeez-
I was joined by a two- ing and check-inflation at odd your-old no viable spare moments during dinner- need of "the extra bene- parties and on rush-hour wes. its from the two insoparubias
Obsessivo diet and exercise" ("the feeling of well-being, pep; the avoid- ance of lethargy") and a friend who had dropped in for a cup of tea and was soon waving his legs in the air and groping in
ogony.
These exercises are obsessive, compulsive and deeply nostalgic, recalling the long hours spent in One's the freezing gymnasiums Spartan English girihood, doing press-ups and arm-swings us I have not yet embarked on much to restore circulation as The Waist or The Bust("... to whittle down English girl→ Bawoning -20cording to jak,
the ideal visualised as a well- hood's currant-bun fure, while Desperate
anything
rounded, rather ample uplified, wearing a despondent Aertex possible 10
The postpone
that Ingloriously contour...."); garment soparaled, m Ultimate,
I made a dash for the but I am already stocking up prophesied the Sack. Discomfort
Loewendatu P records and
with 3lb bags of sugar for
By Practies! Evelyn Loewendall with trembling hunds put The
now I am a dead keen attel weiglat-15fting purposes
convert To merely udvises regular daily lips on the turntable
Living Method bend-and-stretch on the cont There was the voice of Phyfil: working like mad on raising my
Quarter-of-an-hour Calverl,
eyebrows, squeezing my eyelids Slimming. the exercise-narrator tight shut, and blowing out my a day is all it needs. Flabby, parative discomfort of your own carpet.
Does it ever seen to saying: "You are going to work to remove age lines and square, sagging women of the tha: you suffer from on all that excess pudding which
world, unite You have nothing Square Middle.
to lose but your spare tyres, Protruding Bas collected round the large rides from the face." Abdomen,
These must Flabby Underarm, usele area of the hip."
practisel "corporation" abdomens, dead a Bualie Stance?
"All of it?" You are al-
I said glumiy, several times a day for quick fest, and atonle musculature of
results, arul the Marshall Plan is the face, leady demonstrating soine of the settling down on the floor. Ten Signs of Ageing, Are the
Roll-Roll
10 cet quick and probably "fonner hrm underpinnings" of ·Roll-co}l," said Miss Calvert, your trunk beginning to spread? sweet and unmoved, "Roll over Docx your face sag as the on your stornach. This exercise The Loewendahl Method em-, evening takes its qulek toll on may seem very easy, but don't phasises the importance of regu- your face musculature as Milsa Jet it fool you." Tor exercises in conjunction Eve Loewendahl puts it " promise" sald I, my face with the proper diet. Exercises brutally? Are you aware that are vital not only for the still-the modern housewife facts podgy, but also for the woman serious danger in the arm field," whe has peeled herself down to that "the overheavy, pendulous 36-20-30 and still has to im- bust-line presents as serious a predicament as the wadersized eny," and that "rigid bodies are old bodies. The ultimate is vigor mortis?" Reduce u Re. cord Time, or else.
Regular exercisos
The Living Method Course, Published by the Dally Express. Price £3 35.
muffed in the hearthrup.
1 had abash at frog-kicks (The Thigh), scissor-jung (titio), and making myself into a V from a horizontal position. ("We are going to work on both the upper and lower part of the tusumy, fattening the whole frant area.
This is not easy. Try hard.")
BOYS' AND GIRLS' MAGAZINE
While McMugg Slept
When George gave away that Arst
was spade trlek West coumed. If he played a teenaid | 64%OW. spade George would simply pull trumps and make all the rest of the tricks.
West noted all this and at lcast was smart enough to wash a second heart and keep George from making an overtrick.
V-CARD Sendeko
Q-The bidding has been: South Went North
Esst
1
Pass
Рови
1 A
Pass
4 A
Pass
3 J'ass
Pass
Pass
Переми
6. Portion.
You, West, held:
9. Top of the world, 10. 1
30. 1% poetically,
Lankunge. (4)
12 Otherwise (4)
1 2 3 141
18 Card game. (a)
90.
14, 19) 22. Lully, NİNJ
Searchers. (U
DowB
new mane-do for horses (21 Deteat. 14) member") it is space-age with a zing. How smart an dog get'
Me, I wouldn't know
ine for ving.
So they say
SUGGESTION
Pardon
gers in buchy, winch remLİK
stationary for long periode In
). Movement. (
3. Unumut,10
1. Annesthetic, 15) (4) Cupid, (4)
5. Furm
divi
10. (5.41
. A queen, lay
9. Porld. (4)
short (9)
at
Dawn (3.9).
traffe jums should pay a 15, FUr dining
mlum in their fleket: considered.
is being
Would you believe it?
44 NCCENTRICITY muy who a
"ES
tabmentary notoriety for a singer." says a muste.reite, "but
Magn.
1. Lon
Three. (4) Cruinn around.
NJ
48642 7 QJ008 $KJ84
What do you lead?
A-The deace of tramps. The diamond lead is tempting bas your Arst plan with this holding should be to start getting rid of two enemy trinnps at a time.
Wost
TODAY'S QUESTION The bidding has been: Norib Baxt South JA
Pass
7 You, South, hold: AST VAQUE $375 MAQ54
What do you bld?
Аланет Тomorrow
CHESS
Trales-dev's intuicy
by LEONARD BARDEN
YOUR BIRTHDAY ....By STELLA
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 18
BORN today, you have '' Tather you And I diffleuk, lo come right
complex personality, Although
thir personally is highly magnetle, attrneting people Into yexir ostili, you have to winty sumede Eur Ex time by turė rouw admit tisat peruan fuls the circle of your In- Ulmate Frlendis. Enctional and JAN- pulsive of tiger, you somethier re- itect into an Ivory tower and become atnost inertally depressed ul. The state of the world. You Art an Ideallet at heart and I alwaya dise, treases you to see peuple falling short of your original estimate at them.
Although you have the elements, of leadership in your nature, you are often too crsily' influeneni Üy the asknions of others. You went to be. Tair and unbiased in everything, and yet you ve ret ideas on certam subjects. Then you become arbitrary and even, stubbom,
When the incod 11 span you. It [= easy for you to be the life of the party ochotter along without £23 - unstaing of much importance. Yet, af ather trace when you have something hiportant to say,
do
out and say it. Despite the fact that ellers cozñe to you for hdvlog -anut You are quite, frey in giving 11- you are exceptionally close-initiied about your own nites. It almTR seems as it al thres your left hand In idea of what your right hand is up (01
You have a deep revise of the -piritual valuea of life and might Lesive a
tu eater Church. If You will enltivate the latent latent ve speaking well di pubźle, you might becomes a powerful influence fur good upon your times.
Anon 10100 born on bly dajo. gere: Lynan Abbott and Samuel Hakes Cadman, theologi: Theo. dule Ribot, prychologist Alfred 23, Street. author: George, D. Prentice, noted editor: Mary Nolan and Lynn Hari, actresses; and Edward A. MacDowell, composer.
To and what the stars, have in tore for you tomorrow, select your birthday itar and read the cones. ponding paragraph. Lat your birth- day star be your dally guide,
THURSDAY, DECEMBER 19 SAGITTARIUS (Nov, 23-Bec. 32)— You may take a calculated risk fo day and anticipate sirvesitul resul A busines trip could prove fruitful. CAPRICORN (Dec, 23-Jan, 20) A spiritus), mystle day in which you may be concerned with oftaira nutside the, normal trend of your
AQUARIUS - (Jau. 1-Peh, 10)- Personality counts NOW. 1 your best fool forward when meeding" bn- portant people,
Job
PINCEN Feb. 20-Mar 101- Time now to ernventrate on activides on that everything là sâde ready for the holiday season,
(Mar. 21-Apr. 20) Concentrate on taking care of Im- portant details. Not much time ta accomplint a folf So make the inest TAUNUK (Apr. 21-May 21)- A complexity of Interests can cause unsiderable confurton today untro You make every moment count.
OENINI (May 22-June 213- If you are planning to visit rela- Hvis for Chelatinas, bitke sure thin all plus are completed by now.
CANCER (June 22-July 2)}~ Stay on your toce, for this swiftly-paced day with much to be
ecouplisted before nightfall.
LEO
Ze-Aug. (July
23)- Children's Interesla are being high- lighted. Lest-minute shopping detalls should be taken cere of at once.
VIRGO (Aug. 24-Dept. 23) 1 asked to
11 Bino ernumunity festivities, give of your Well as ottering fuairelat support
LIBRA {Bept. 24-Oct 13)- Romanus interests are higjulgated, Anticipate a pleasurable day willi the one you love the most.
SCORPIO (UR, 24-NOV.
It involved in reisil marchandising, then this will be one of your br days the month..
Gio, 03591 A problem by R. Prytz (Natal Mercury, 1924), White males in Lwa.
Solution No. 5318: 1... RXP chl: 2 BXR, Ki-K16 ch; 3 BXR, Q-Rich; 4, B-R2, Q×9 ch; $ XxQ. R-RI ch; 6 Q-RS, RxQ mate.
Lendon prata ServiLE
TARGET
S
TBA
MU
1
words at
four Jetters
or more cal you make from the letters in the
the left in making each word, th lettere in each of the all equates may be tied ouça only. Each word must contain the tarer tetter in the centre samare, and there invist be at least one nine-letter word in the Tish. Na pluraja; no foreign words to proper namico. TARGET: · good in words, very good war ercellonk, Solution tao.
YEATURDAY'S SOLUTION. ~ Aalian weten siste alle anlie, giuset stanicament janka sajan" elst welja, mixt, grail o fort, Faxllery PAOTIONAL MEMINTAMEN DEAL CANDIDă, dit down tons, Troni" ins fete Bit list surt pakai čaj main tale zalloci takin tincal fait final tanis
4.
white tops fall, new dandelions grow. Isn't that the way it hap pens?"
"I think Uke Pixie Mc- Mugg." Hanld said after Pixle O'Scowl had finished. "He may have a face like a dishpon, but It's a very ulco fuce just the sure."
Svarthing Unusual Happened To His Face- By MAX TRELL
"I only wish," said that everyone was as kind and as I may have men- Goned before," said Pixie Pixie O'Scowl shook his head. good-natured as Pixie MeMugg." Bald "I guess you're right,' "It isn't as easy as that. The O'Scowl to Knart and Hanid, the Shadow Children with the wind comes along ant blows the Pixle O'Scowl. "Everybody likes Turned-About Names, "there's white tufts away all right, but MeMugg-and that includes me." no Pixie in O'Cheer Holl who they don't all fall in places has a face like Pixie McMugg" where dandelions can grow."
"What's la face look like?" "What do you mean?" asked
Hanld. asked Knart curiously.
"Like a dishpan," said Pixie "For example," sald Pixie O'Scowl, "Like, a very old dish- O'Scowl, "suppose one of the pan that's been banged and kick- tufts fell on a rock. Would that ed and scratched."
be a place for a dandelion to grow?"
Pixle O'Scowl started to laugh. It was not a very long or cheer- fut laugh, for Pixie O'Scowl was a gloomy Pixic.
"What are
you laughing about?" unit asked
"I'm laughing about something that happened to Pixie MeMugg last year about this time."
Gnarled Bonch
Pixle
Kuart and Hanid readily ad mlited that a rock was no place for a dandelion to grow.
"Or suppose."
"Pixie O'Scow! went on, one of the dandelion tufts fell down a chimney? Or got liselt caught on a top of n railroad train? Or tell in a plate of soup? None of them could any of those places, Krow ellher, could they?"
Knarf and Hanid shook their heads,
"So you see, my dears," con- tinued Pixie O'Scowl. "There was plenty of work for McMug to do except, of course, before, he ldn't care to do it
as 1 sold
Pixie O'Scowi, Kharf and Hanki sat themselves down com fortably on the gnarled bench In front of O'Cheer Hall at the roots of the Old Oak. Then O'Scowl began, the story.
"For the most part, Pixie Me- Mugg didn't mind working hard at any job that came along, but
"Bosh!' he said, "Why should There was one job he hated. He hated dandellan-planting.” I chasing after dandelion tutts? I don't care where they Here Kaart spoke up. "Do dandelions have to be row. It's none of my business!! "With that," Pixie O'Scow! planted, Pixie O'Scow!? I just went on, "McMugg lay down un- thought they
a clover. A few minutes selves. I mean, the top of the der dandelions turn while, then the later, he was fast asleep with his And what wind comes niong and blows mouth wide open. them away and, wherever the happened?"
planted them-
MEMUSE lay down under a clover and fell asleep,
"A dandelion tuft fell in his mouth Hantd shouted "That's what happened!"
"That's only half of what happened," sald Pixie O'Scowl. "Two dandellon tufts fell in his to open mouth They, started grow, and by the ume Pixie MeMugg woice up, he looked more like a flowerpot-not like n dishpan! But the surprising thing is this: Instead of looking battered and scratched, he look- ed flowery and pretty."
to Plxle O'Seawi stopped
result." said Pixle Q'Scowl, "was that bic- Mugg become quite fond of dandelions. He never let a day. puss without planting a dozen or more. And he always had couple of them tucked prettily in the corners of his mouth."
chuckle again."
"And. the Ainul
Rupert and the Thinking Cap
Rupee is just golim to tell sunny, morning? What matter Gregory that he too has difficulty, now?". Rupert quickly içila her about what to ask from Santa Claus - why Gregory looka ao mimrable when there is a cheery call, and and Tigerlily umiles. "So little their friend Tigerlily hurries up gulowapig no can.t'ink," she says. **Allo, "allo,” celea. That velly interesting, welly new the slope. the little Chinese girl. Why you problem. Now you, wait whilla both, not look happy on so fine.. me tank. -- fraps me can help
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
a
יא!
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