Page
This Funny World
Simonski
"Oh, for goodness sakes, did you get up on the
wrong side of the bed, again?”
BY
between
THE
WAY
by Beachcomber
CAN there be any connection and Aramintn." The discovery revent of The amorous theft whe made smuggling of corsets Into Equa- by the fond inother. "Arnold," der and the Health Ministry s cried, "it Gas gone!" Her announcement that more then son verified this grave, news by 200.000 are issued free every exploring with a cautious hand year in this country?
utely pleasure Jome. (Coleridge) which Whispered
Haa some secret corset gang comment Bad likened to il been stockpiling the stuff in billiard ball. When Gertrudo remoto Lancashire warehouses conferred what she had done and then shipping them (on the Lestinon smiled ruefully. dark nights) 1 Pun Istand? Sadd his mother, "Arnold, only a From there they could ensify be churl would allow personal landed on the coast In some vanity to wither at a glance the lonely creek and rushed by lorry tenir shots of a young girl's to Cuenca. The Liberal Con- love," "Ma, replled the post- gress at Oxford discussed this man, "De Strabismas (Whom matter and decided to make God Proserve) of Utrech shall representations the Ministry be my best man, Gertrude and of Health, the Foreign Olee. I will often tell our it!le ones and the Permacul Interior the tale of how Love thwarted
Committee which investigates Science,“ the dumping of Japanese rommets.
Love conquers ali
-A-clever-scheme
THE Post Office is considering
every
subscriber
of
a sebeme to induce people THE ruthless seythe of passion
has mowed the postman's B to give up telephones. The solitary hair. In more homely dra is that language, Gertrude Mol stole should be allowed six free calls upon her fiance as he dozed and must to the in flar snipped from hto hend is his or her chote. There is no lonely sentinel. It now reponis genotre that the star would between the leaves of "Love -- 30 weer,
subscribers world be able to boast: "I was on the phone yesterday to Rita Demenice." The scheme may by extended to include racing motorists.
CROSSWORD
#7
ALTUSI 1. Raise drag. canak.). 191
5. A wide ses with violence, (5)
The space around.
Harsh, but it's ring sent around.. (V)
10. They keep you close. (4)
1 could be interpreted in
two dinerent ways. (T
18. Dainy seen round about Christ-
20, (41
16. Enabled without end. 44)
17. Meludy. 13)
18. Tik šike an orator, or act like
whale. (5),
21, suitable in time, (3)
3. Many sportsman will swing
for it here (3)
23. TAK Like-on helps many
overloaded piane. (8)
Bow
1. Desert island charsoter. [8]]
the
TARGET
HOW DRY
Faur
words of
Helter
or more ran
DS
U
you ше
1
C
letter in the
The left? 10 mak
U
OA
word. Le Tectare in rack of the small guares may be used ofice wly. Enen word must contain the Inrge letter in the geutre Nouare, and there must be at trast or attie-letter word in the plurais, nu foreign Words Yo proper unines TODAYS TAUGET; M worde good g words, Tr WATAN excellen Comorrow
oaklan
זArrow? w
подредза
YESTERDAY S MOLUTION WORTHY arrow
+ WATET flaw them than twy wait Mart
what was way with
wasili mar:by wraoh
wary what wider
wy way wa
Math Mral woth
TELOW
THE CHINA MAIL, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 1957.
*JACOBY ON BRIDGE
North's Neck In Grinder
By OSWALD JACONY
WEST'S pring bid was
minimum or maybe a bi
ર
less so that in spite of his part- ner's strong bidding he pissed at two no-tromp
This was too much for North. Without stopping to realise that hits partner was marked with on absolute bl Dr possibly oue Jack, North stuck his neck right into the mirat grinder und well- ed "Double," Fast redoubled and South rub out to three clubs. Wesi doubled that and East doubled the three-heart rescue.
of
as
West opened the jack hearts. He wanted to net as many enemy, trumpa ou possible. The Jark was allowed tu hold and West played a second heart. Dummy's ace won the trick and the king of dia- monds was led and täkten by West's are. West played a low spade and South went wrong, He played dummy's ten.
Fast won with the queen and took his high heart and shifted to the four of clubs. West won
WEST (D) *A932
J
A953 *K 107
Went
Pass Pasa
NORTH
KJ100
A 1097
• XQJ 10
Q
29
KAST 4074
KQG 870 #AJ94
-SOUTH 400-
8432
+42
400032
Both vulnerable
North East South
Double Redouble 1 ♥ 2❤ 2 N.T. Pass Double Redouble 3 ♣
Double Pors
Double 3 ❤
Рабо Pass
Opening lead-✡ J-
with the log and piryed a ser oud eub which was puffed
jury.
in
This gave declare: his second trick. I enhed dummy's thrce good diamonds and eventually made his remaining trump for t fatal ef six tricks and ainus
of 100 points.
South could have saved one trick If he had gone up with the king of spades, but even the 800 set was better than letting two no-trump play redoubled, East would surely have made s contract for a plus of 830 and probably wouldi have made an overtrick for 100 points niora.
♥-CARD Serisens
Q-The bidding has been: North East South West
14
You, South, hold: AK: ❤KA76 4AQS 41087 0
What do you do?
A--Bid three no-iramp, This is an overbid but you have no other bid and are too strong to pass.
TODAY'S QUESTION
The bidding has been the same as in the previous question.
You, South, hold:
AK 1098 K2 9875 GATSI
What do you do?
Answer Totmerrow
3. Hod Lou Feather, ad YOUR BIRTHDAY
Red
Duck. [41
4. Pit Ideas mixed. (9)
gray might get it. (. )
7. Dr strong inina. (D)
8. Pullow. (B)
11. len and an M.P.
makes them
-not of gold
LIN. (
14. Looks open-
mouthed.
(4)
19. Wild
ona.
wiin tageti.
(30)
12. Short for a
المون
buy 7
each does.)
Yesterday's STATION
CHESS
By LEONARD BARDEN
The former Essex champion, Dr. Fazekas, one of the most Ingenious attacking players in the country. The following win by him is against the Scottish International. Dr. Altken. P-KI, P-QB4; 2 Kt—KB3, P-KKW: 3 P-B4, 8-K12, 1 P-Q4, PXP: 5 KLXP, KI—QBS; B-K3, K-B3; 7 PB3, 00:8Q-Q2, P-K3; 7 Kt---83 (safer is 9 B-K2), P-Q4; 19 KixK, PxK; 11 R-QI, Q-RI: 12 BPXP, KPxP:_18 PXP R-K1: 14 K-82. R Ki; 10 B-K2, PXP: 10 B-QI (losing quickly; better is 10 KR-K1). R-K15; 17 Q-84 KR4 18 Q-RI, Rỵ8; 19 "RXR B-B3: Resigna
Queen ta lost.
The
Solution No. 5207: 1 K-KLI fwaiting! Note the tries Ram 917. B-851 or 1R-B1. B- 95: bath emphasising the fusion of white and black half- pins.
London: Exprel), Firstca,
}
WOMANSENSE
How they get St. Trinian's out of
your girl's hair...
by SYLVIA 'LAMOND
arich
McCorquodale had bara THE conversation
come round, as always, signed to buiter-less living.)
But I understand her possion to the enormous cost of for standards,
don't And I educating our young-and I think anybody needs a jerking said: "What a waste of up of standards more than the money finishing schools are boarding school.
average girl from a British
these days." Mrs Hugh She has crouched over a dest McCorquodale (mother of for 10 years, and continues to Mrs Gerald Legge) looked rouch all around the house. amazed.
IS IT WORTH IT?.
"Would
Anger
"Darling," she said. you want our girls to grow up no snowing what n bowl is for?
"With standards" slipping "ali over the place, where else are we going to give our children tiny limpse of the correct way"
now
has been segregated from
the other sex, and does hir famous right-wing bolt when- ever It appears. Something has to be done about her figure, her voice, her St Triniun's beeps.
If by sending a daughter a
21
"In the heme where there anishsig school I got back a was once a buller, the family
with lovely young woman does the washing-up. A high potential. I'd start saving Food nishing school at least now. teaches a grl What to do with a butler if she ever geis one," I was not convinced, being a generation younger than Bar-
Put It costs between £500
and £1,000 for a year-and I wander, is it worth 12
To And out I visited a "... And is allowed out with ty pleal school in Knightsbridge young men," I sakt,
tastefully
appointe "Ah-h-h. But young men are A girl house (brochure language for submitted to me dest.
Ainishing schools) which brints her boy-triond to me ance belonged to Lily Langtry. hefore they go out and I make In her mudy, surrounded by tactful suggestions about where pictures of Old Girls in their he should take her." Court-curtsy gowns, 1 met the principal, Mle, Palanque.
She said that turning s
schoolgirl into a lady was not
DISCRIMINATING
A pleasant
ARE there never any
Inckients?"
asked,
The principat beamed
1212-
I
Page 5!
Does the school provide any sex instruction?
"I give it, cnly as a mother
suld would,"
Mademoiselle, "If a girl wants to quietly. knny anything or I feel she is confused; we try to straighten it out over a cup of coffee,”
De the girls learn anything to help them earn a living?
"I con range for them to desire have any courses they outside," sald Mademoiselle.
"But practicni instruction has always been secondary in Д
1 very rarely have to deat Inishing school. We visit
a process that changed, "The greatest thing is to help the girl assume authority for assuringly. herself. We make a stori by
enxing her to switch off her with An unsuitable esport, muscunis,, selected plays and own light at bedtime."
Mademoiselle's face by its hate of marmalade hair shone with sincerity.
"Remember, the girl has had verything done for her.
recall
After all, girls who live in a concerts; we give dancing charming atmosphere with classes, a little cookery and a other charming girls soon be- certain amount of etiquette. cone discriminating,
French is the only Important "Her face Bad- subject " only
0:10 rather dened lightly . "Although nusty Incident. That was when today. I am afraid, shorthand "Once she can switch or her I had to pack a girl off to 1 has come to us all, own light, the Is ready for Scotland to part her (rom other responsibilities. She gets very peculler young man-mod 50 TO 60 WPM
her own front-door key, " even he had a title,"
"JATURALLY I would never
Stick It On The Back Of Your Head...
& Forget It
By Hazel Meyrick
A
London.
FTER all the fuss about hats that hide your face, hats that sil on lop of your head, and the kind you wear down one side of
the back of your hend and it. it's the hat you stick on
forget about - that is making news in London
now.
Back, with bang, are the beret, the jelly-bag cap and the 'windsock' turbon, They cover your hair completely, look neat and chic, and everyone can And a version lo suit them.
כון
For
lly verul; of course, is the one hat that suits all women, who feel slightly self-conscious
anything too smart. once Paris has come round our way of thinking--and the beret is suddenly high fashion.
The 1920's are recalled-by the felt helmel-shaped hats that five
well worn pulled down over the cars. Tall girls are burying
sof: shower-caps in fubrics which droop practically down to shoulder-level, sinall Frls are snapping up pert French sailor berets in shock- ing cink, biller yellow and other bright shades. But the girl who wants to stand out in
a crowd is the one who is buy-
In this year's beret to end all beret's in fluffy snow-white
Left:
Two versions of the beret, both selling in London at under thirty shillings: A velvet shower-cup, with a loop trimming at the back. Right: A 'wind-
sock turban in soft, pliable felt,
BOYS'
AND GIRLS'
World's Marble Champ
-Nobody Played Marbles The Way Policeman Did
By MAX TRELL
Ľ
press a girl for high ef- ciency. If she wants to be shorthand specialist she must take a course elsewhere.
"En she simply wants to be useful to her husband, tak- Ing a few notes for him when they ore abroad on a busines Arfp..." Mile Palanque's face
brightened . "then I happy If she manages 30-00 words a minute,"
Still 1
Am
not convinced.
Surely there must be something cise for all that investment?
HER SECRET
MADEMOISELLE Palanque let
secret. "Seventy- nine of my girls have marelėd in the past 29 months," Aht said. "And they have all made ruch very, good marriages."
"This," she added simply. "Is what impresses parents."
It reminded me of something- Mrs McCorquodule had said:-
"My daughter had... a rather German ghastly time at her finishing school. But they took her up a mountain, and eight at the lop, the most circumstances she
husband."
romancio
met her
MAGAZINE
"Where were you this lime?" sked Knarf.
זיי
was Policeman.
in_Indin," said the "So I had my dioner in an Indian restaurant
my house with my marbles. I (and very good food was, rolled one down the street and 100) and I went right on rolling Inclusing. has a wide blackNARE, the Shadow, went welled the other one after my marbles all through the velvet headband with pear! down the street. He threw "Just the way I did,” sak! night under the bright moon. trimming in centre front, and a marble and made it roll ahead Kiurf.
It was morning when I looked મા fabulously of him.
up again. You know where I Then he throw on- olher marble and made it li "Exnetly the way you did!" was expensive French model.
"So I nodded the Policeman. the first marble.
"Where?" asked Knart, All the way down the street kept rolling the marbles, une Knart throwing one after the other, one after the marble after the other, making other, on and on, down streets, them hi, picking them
up, dawn roads. across bridges,
over mountains. throwing them out again.
Suddenly it was noon and 1.looked up,*
"Where were
you?" asked Knarf.
By STELLA is a copy of
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 19
perisaner In un
Bots today. Head Falch you might be to the mediums of this art, it in more like
for business and will And that practies, thy A V-niihe trazas out Baconsfully fog Mish. Maite # a poltst the strike vent day your vit as so 'DA possib Yout
$1 happy working for oflich, and the best auth Toward contentmeal and sheena
bc- them wadig tr coming your own boss. You have a witch draw a magnetle personalitę profile you and makes it easy for you no dirent them is tuny enter- Naturally leader, you will rike.
jy that you well satisfy these yearn- าดเง by
being
cantsinstin patience and sorter of those who do plena professlunatly,
You pirn ure ne public speaker. are, Hond organleers and might well look into the idea of going ing polities. You would probably do welt ramning for any elective umer and then, if you applied yourself, you might become a real statenman
be able to gather together a good is likely that you will make what is group of workers You might do called good" inarriage. This wit well in prisonnel work, since you help you În, your success us well an have the keen might and abluty to bring you great happines,
CHILDREN LOVE MOLASSES COOKIES
MR
u11
MOLASSES cookies h
all-time favourite in school lunch palls. Here they ure, done with a different flavour with the addition of prunes,
went
He Meets A Friend
Finally Korf reached the corner with his two marbles. There he met his friend, the Policeman.
"Good
morning, Policeman," said- Knorf.
"Good morning, Knart," sak the Policeman.
"I'm
playing marbles," said
"It's a wonderful game," said
To make, you will use 34 cup of cooked prunes;
cup shortening; 1⁄4 cup sugar; 1/3) cup of light matusses; 211⁄2 cups Knarf sified all-purpose flour; 33 tea- spoon of ginger; 1 teaspoon of
teaspoon of soda; andi cup of water, Remove the pits from the prunes and chop. Cream 10-! gether the shortening,
"I was la Chine," said the Follecninn.
"In China?" exclaimed Knart. The Policeman nodded,
Chinese Lunch
They Rolled On
"I was in Egypt. So I had in an Egyptian my breakfast restaurant and then I went on roiling toy marbles some more. rolle. them through Spain and France and Germany and Scotland and England and Ireland and then," said the Policeman, "I rolled them aerosa the Atlantic Ocean."
Ocean,
4:19
"Did you ever play marbles?" Kuart asked Pollceman.
Well, I'd better be getting along. Good morning, Kharf."
"Good morning, Policeman," rald Knart.
Then the Policeman walked of.
Knarf went back up For Jutat Д moment, the street, rolling one marble after
the
Knart let out an exclaration. "How could you roll marbles "So I had my lunch in a
the across
Atlantic Chinese restaurant," he said, Policeman?" he said. "and then et thenugh a pure and ext-al' the
went on rolling my Among those born on this date real trum. You are a pond judge of were: Grant Overlon and Louis
I rolled them and marbles. character and rately have to change Vance,
Policeman. authors; Wüllaın 1. Aalor,
rolled them, your opinion, ence it has been elven, nacier; Andrew Pickent, South Elt;
"When you were a boy," said hills, across fields. Now it was "My dear
on and on, over Falleeran paused, then he said, the other. But he kept looking boy, no one played up every few minutes to make Carolina slalesinin; Johu H. Crosby, is appears to make you a early
Kharf, did you ever play Montanu Governot,
and
dinner time and I looked up marbles the way I did! I throw sure he wasn't in rather stein, forbidding porn, this Disti P. Wilder, Board:
marbles?" is quite the wrong idea. You are
Thein right again."
neross the ocean.
India. "When I was a boy," answered Diy, velity and piesture-loving To find what the tale have and ke to enters in your own
Policeman, store tor you tomorrow, elect your
played rcing
and birthday star and read the corres ponding paragraph,, Get your Birin day klar be your dady guldde.
Many of you, wit ind that the stage fulds a real fascination for you.
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 20
As an employer or an employee, you
(Feb.
20-MEAT.
Sugar
tho molasses. Sift the flour marbles with ginger, salt and soda. Stir night.
I
morning, noon
I never got tired of
into the creamed mixture alter-playing marbles. I rolled them nately with water. Stir in the all around the world,"
prunes, and drop the mixture
30)
| cooky
Knurt looked at the Pulice-
д
man in astonishment.
"You rolled around the world?" Knarf sold.
pli
by teaspoonfuls onto a greased
sheet, Bake in
grees) 12 to 15 minutes.
Yield, about 40 cookles... United Press.
VOLGO Gang. 24-Sept. 23) personal and business success just Fave possiblities in busines for you. RICER should and conditioni excellent, Good fortune alte:ds you, to make moderately hot even (370 de
LIDRA (pl. 24-0c1. 23) the best posilute use of all oppertuni- This can be one of the month's big tio now offered, Show alliative. days but B also behooves you in ARIES (Mar. ti-Anr. 20)— put forth your best efforti CO1 This is an outstanding day, especialty inually
for financial matters Involving pre- scoarie (Oct, •_24-Nov. 22)-perty or real estate, Close a deal, Combine petional affairs with your "TAURUS
2}}- (Apr. 21-May] busters Interests for the brgi posis. A record-making day. The stars may bin success. Can be a romantic day, you may achlove some long-term objective for, which you have” bges SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 22) working... Prospects are fair and can be turned GRMINI (May X3-June 11)
100.
Household Hint
be
Your un opener should kept as clean as Eny other into excellent necount if you will A gais day socially as well as being
kitchen utensil. Wash it in, hợt: put forth big efforts, Can be en ima productive in financial and busineri portant day.”.
Affairs
water and soap after each use. CAPRICORN · (Dec. 29-7425) 20)— CANCER (June *-July 14) You can be more adventuremine Maks spectacular gains now. There
Openers mounted on the wall Hiki other times and 'gain an im- is rolling standing in your way. portant advantage to develop your Forgo abead successfully,
con usually be lifted off the 180 aucom potential.
(July N - AME
hinge for enay cleéning. “A AQUARIUS (Una, X-FI). 19) 11 plane hays been well-madky now small brush' is handy for clean- Feierully
work is the time to executs then spying the opener's cutting edge, netdon lps can jeward # happy combination of and miccessfully," No, mere delay.
13)
marbles
"I don't know how it bip- pened," said the Policeman, "but that's what did happen. And if you care to hear about I, FI tell you just how it come ubout."
Knarf Wanted To Know
Kharf said he would very much like to hear about how. the Foliceman rolled marbles all around the world,
This is the story the Police- man told:
"One "morning, fight': after breakfast, I went out in front of
Rupert and the Fiddle--25
At the sight of so many people from here!" says Simon, grabbing Abou Simple Simon “Rupert'a arm and scuttling through running becomes very nervous. We were some curtains and down a prosage. told to get out of everybody's "Half amo'," calls the little bear
Let's Ro." way."; he whispers.
"Your cap as blown off. H« "Yes, but where ?ays Rupert. paumes and looks back just my a
· gorgeous steward appears following. "We don't know our way about the castin," "Oh anywhere away them through the same curtains."
ALL Riours heØENVED ***
1
China or
NEWLY ARRIVED!
RUPERT
SUMMER ADVENTURES Two Exciting New Stories in full colour
$1.00
Aho
NEW RUPERT ANNUAL
1957-8 $4.50
At S. C. M. Post Offices