This Funny World
VALLEY DUDE RANCH
Maha
"I didn't want a too spirited one-but this is ridiculous!"
BY
A
THE
"ARYNGITIS
WAY
by Beachcomber
ly no joke," wrile, a doctor, But It
was once.
During the First World War an officer was detalled to take
6 party of important visitors
up to the front line trenches on
.
time of the commencomeng of n shower of rain. Mr Justice Cocklecurrat frowned:
The brothers Zola
INCE taking over
nutionel Bitumen Emulsions
THE CHINA, MAIL, MONDAY, AUGUST 19, 1957. ·
• JACOBY ON BRIDGE
False Card · Sets Sure-Fire Slam
By OSWALD JACOBY
INTIL a Better One conCY along today's hund will have to go as the swindle of the year, The hero or villain was the well known French expert, Georges Theron; the victim, an unnamed South.
WOMANSENSE
DOES THE LARGE LADY KNOW HOW TO MAKE THE
MOST OF HER SIZE?
of
London, measuremente," the red-hot and designers' eyes—and those ET'S face it the fashion-wize Momma told me in the lady who buys their pro- recently. Sophie ducks. however discreetly
Laverage Englishwoman London reely 5000 vents her dress to cut, however plain
"Any
would the
The bidding le not approved.. The siam should have been bid is not the tali, slender wil- old", has a waist measurement the design and dark the colour, in no-trump rather than ja ispades since a successful heurt
lowy creature we imagined that clocks up 40 Inches, finesse would have insured
to be. her the
She's short, slam irrespective of how the spades broke. Of course, six spaces should have made also
plump and 'comfortable looking according to a but here is what Monsieur sizing report from London published recently. Her hoight is 5 feet 2 inches. her vital statistics: 37-27- 38%.
Theron did to South.
The opening lead of the club jeek was won in dummy and the king of spades led. Monsieur Theron dropped the queen.
large woman rather look her size and wear something that's fashion-right and attractive, than try to look discreet in a style cut on silm, dull Unes," she added.
1
nothing on earth will diagulac fact that he is large- thun-average, so the sooner she admits it d
Lo gots down wearing fushlonable clothes
the better, for she has many
advantages over the rest of
US.
The large lady can take her Sophlo was just underlining fashion in large helpings-only what we've always raid that outsize women have enough large ladies have as much right room to display those wide to be in fashion as anyone else. white sailor collars, those
manufacturers don't huge artificial
and !lowers, strings of multi-coloured bends. Only large ladies can adequate- ly cope with the big handhags
The nation-wide survey, Lon- ducted by dress manufacturers, showed that there is t far larger legion of outsize ladies in But ten
Britain thas anyone has 812- pected.
Now South entered bis hand with the ten of diamands and fed 3 spade toward dummy's spot. He did not mind losing a
NORTH AKI01
DC
2T
• AKQJ3 ★AQA
WEST
foter-
♣ J2
+75
J100765
a quiet eccter, He answered and the Kellon Zine Accessories
Rue
all questions in a whisper, and, I have been impressed by the to be on the kafe side, the spate of writings about Proust. Vialtors,
too, began to whtspee. If ever I write my auto- When they came to the Support
port biography, he will be in the trenches, o Cabinet Minister Index, because when I was in sold in a whisper, "How far are Parle as & boy, my father took we from the Germana?" "About me to Weber's in the three
mile," quarters of a
Proust used to go whispered the guide.
"Then there, and I can easily permunde Why are we all going on like myself that I saw him. this?" asked the Minister. "I down his name will go, to the don't know about
you," deligh of the
Prouts, my possible
whisperert the guide "but I've got laryngitis.**
The fried egg
IVING expert evidence,
A
Royale.
"Zola,
50
Also in the index will be
Emile," and "Zola Gorgon," with the story of how the writer's obscure brother Gorgen gave his name to the pathologist sald that CE famous cheese, to annoy Emile. stains found on the driver's 10 How Anatole France laughed! could not have been more than 43 minutes old, thus leading to Unrehearsed effect the supposition that the driver had eaten the e. Mrs Wedge
testified that when the driver's car passed her at 11.29 (Green-
to be mi
DURING
the shooting of Hogwasel's new flim unfortunate incident bccurred. wich time) his mouth appeared The two lovers were in a rose Asked by Mr garden on a stil summer night, for He had just said, "Gee, honty Honeyweather Gooseboote the defence or prosecution or the pory of Nalure sure does something, how she knew the comp'n to me." and she had just that exact time, Mrs Wedge replied, repl
replied, "Yew cza Say watchmaker's orain, buster," when the wind- daughter."
Mr Tinitlebury machines ured in the hurricane Snapdriver remarked that one serne were turned on, and the might as well expect a water- pair of them were blown clean. -diviner's daughter to how the nut or the garden.
bm
YOUR BIRTHDAY.
EAST 4097
K10732 ⚫ 9852
SOUTH (D)
AA1653
❤AQS
104 1
K83.
Both: vulnerable
South West Norih
Pass 3.
3N.T. Pass
44
East Pass Pass
G
Pass
Pasz
1
Pass Pass Opening lead— J
trick f East had started with queen-jaek of spades blank but he wanted to guard agains; los- ing two trump tricks should West hold four to the jack-nine, West won, with the Jack and for want of anything better to do led a second club. Monsieur Theron trumped and the hand was down.
Like most hands of this type rather doubt that it took place except in someone's imagination, yet the whole play was fairly logical. Monsieur Theron knew from the bidding that South would hold the heart ace. Не also could see that the hand was bound to make unless his side could plek up two trump tricks play and that his sensational would be the only wuy to get them.
CARD Senseko
Q-The bidding has been: North
By STELLA
Bask South West
24
Pass 24
Pass
3+
Pass 44
Pass
Pass
SV
"
there is No more prestating-- Just, out-and-out Gazy-in getting Around lu doing it!
MONDAY, AUGUST 19
have В tem BORN today, you
perament that full of con- trosis. On the one hand you are impetuous and, at times, rather ton dominating, aggressive and demand. Ing. On the other, you are khely, sympathetic and optimistic. There may be strey and strain,between the pmetiest, business side of your nature and the prisile, devlieniny- care elements Het tempered and quick to anger, you are just qulex Lu root 5 am cifer zafi Apolog: But often is too late. Leam to count 10 before you answer in wrath and you will save matty a heartache. While you never
a grudge, others mas!
Sinew you are a good st Dr hostess, you will want to entertain In Sour own hone You are very affectionate and demand a great deal..from the one you love. But you retuma it in kind and show great ivation 314 loyalty, February apstars to be your most, forțurste irnath each year, and Tuesday, your "lerky day. Your Intellions keen. Learn to depend upon them moir when okablog decisions.
Amen thrise Bar
This date were: Fred Stone and Kenneth
are
You ar Datural student and Mack, actor: James Gould what is known on the stage Da
Cazzers, author: Fir
Ferguson.
have In
"antek study." In fact, you have a ketter: Orville Wileht, poncer In true care of the dramatle aid aviation; and Sidoey Morre and inigut make a merombat career an Joynes Lerox, rehuesturs.
screen, i radio or the stage ne television. You have a tremendous atore of unthusiasm, and your ener Ke know no bunds unto you be- eine interortret in a prajeet. Sti.
If you are bored with Homething,
sclect
read
Pass 54 Poss You, South, hold:
AAE785 32 4381.4765
What do you do?
A-Bld five spader. You have never rebid your spade sult and now that your partner has shown heart control there may be seven in the hand,
TODAY'S QUESTION. Your partner continues by bid. ding six diamonds. What do you do?
Answer Tomorrow
CROSSWORD
-
Tu Bad what the Renzi 26*4>1< [Or you tomorrow. birthday itar and
Ing paragraph. pour burieday star be Nie daly guide.
Let
12 3
TUESDAY, AUGUST 20
LEO (July 24-Aug. 23)—If you sure AQUARIOS (Jan. 21-Feb. 15)— planning a bualnesa trận, niso plan. If you have sidestepped serious pre- to Keth song picanite as a by- birms the past few days, there can
Hurnance is also passitile. be trouble now. Proto (Aus 21-Bept. 23)-Fine prospect seem to be guaranteed i your health is up to par and your enthusiasms are kept at high piten, LIBRA (Rept. 24-let, 23)-Allend to important matters only und far-
PIACES (Fib. 20-Mar, 201-Duny lines are ahead when you need to he wady i tak selvantage of new opportunities. Make plans BOW.
ARIES (MAT. 21-Apr. 201 There en be a fandeney towart a personal
get about monenentials. Your today undeas you take
health is of the utmost Importance,
ACORPIO UCL. 24-NOV, ZZ)-
If your judgment recenity has been
Una brámiary precautions.
TAURUS (Apr. 21 May 2})-The Keneral trend is now taking a turi Recurate, then things should of the better. Handle financial
about you want AGITTARIUS (Nov. 3-Dec, 22) mettere you have previously post- Unexpected events may cause undue poned tensions untere you are prepared in -advance to ael sensibly;
CAPRICORN (Dec. 23, 20)- You are not exactly in the mood to today, but copo with emergencies stay calm it culled upon to do so.
CHESS
By LEONARD BARDEN
(Ne. (249)
A problem by B. J. da C. Andrade (Bouth African Chess Magazine, 1940). White matos És turo,
'London Exprana Berrios
VEINI (May 12-June. '233—you' may court god fortune if you have been showing whehign, tú making unctiest decisions Intely.
CANCER fuse. 22-July 23)-You Pensia be able to minke wistential
Fuccess today.
la
10
12 13
+
Acron
1. it keeps the home to place. (8) 3. Qurlish laughter. (6)
Usccarian. (3)
8. Ita a dángerous thing for a ypolitamani so be too bear this, (+5)
10. Por the most part the most. Lo
on the lot. (8-0)
advance along the road, to eventual. A Spoils and changed. (8)
18. It
More something of fitue
TARGET
How many words of
NLA four letters
1
ΙΑΠ
or more cau make
tellers in the SOLATE On vke, jeft ↑ da making rack word, the Lecters, in rach of this mnall aquares may be used once
FC
A
ly. Each word must contain the large letter in the pentre sinare, unit there mÜRE
bo t
least one nine-letter word in the tint No plurals; no forcien words : Dog Proper TODAY'S
ната.
Doo 24 WOCHET: 1B WordN
worelu, ascellent,
COMOTTON,
Very good
Bolution.
SATURDAY'S • EPLUTION, kydim bella bolsa kijine buides star bila
MUDİSTEMELE MUSIC BAGS
jila kama tied cărn
bei seined,MHI BÓI, slats "shd' allés
19. Rims are upset when the tram
has no fis con00,
(8)
20: The lady in the inval. (3)
21. Zoding animal. (3)
22 Colour of cha fayre ladro. (3) 23. The Nders watobed her, (8)
Down-
1. Are they Just the places for squirrel to keep nuta? (4-5)
la Tho, tectise who oblige Diem
them (0)
8. The Amartean soldier le mext sp
. saint
(4)
4. you and sho's fiáif an American(
14)
5. Begging without Crosby, (8)
* Talk gives YOU. A
good start
when you drive away, (3)
2. The workers of Bedan 1 (0)
8. Ever” big brother,
11. Jiw bound to coma at the close
of the day,
ii)
19. Onoose in
_shock (6)
14. LORD Brosa.
15. Athena mat).
(0)
17. Bus kept a
date with
This news gives the fashion. boys just one more excuse to turn out stit more cosy little dresses for the dumpy little woman, designed, apparently to make her look as unfashionable as possible.
Do
But are outsize ladies an.isfied with the elo.he. they find wah- ing for them. the stuck-rails Or would they prefer some- thing more adventurous? they want to look stimmer-or
There's more fashionable? doubt in the mind of the largest Indy of them all, Sophile Tucker, """When 1 buy clothes. I look for something designed for a
10 2-year-old, adopted my
no
the
believe it,
They stick to the same old styles-plain mos, crepe, with
at cross-over bodice that has to
s
that are currently in fashion. up be kept in place with a brooch, It's just a case of scaling
till displays Fenerous quanti your accessories to match your
throat....an old- size. fashioned-looking skir!, with a curious kind of trill down one side which is raid to look slim- ming...and when they burst into prints they dig down and fd the dullest patterns in the warehouse,
Not for the larger woman ure the drip-dry cottons, the stain- free fabrles, they have to be content with thick, shiny ma- trials, for it's almost impossible to find a gay cotton dress in a large size.
It's tune romebody pulled the blinkers away
the
from
And when it comes to prints, who else can get away with some of the newest cottons for dressmaking the wide deck- chair stripes, the monster cab- bage roses and rawl-printed designs.
If you're on It's worthwhile
Page
Smart teenage separates -- a striped spun rayon jersey with a big white collar topa a matching shirt in pleated flannel.
can
So if you have to patronisé the large side, most of Dlor's customers
the ford his prices, they've achiev- the large lady's deportment, de- watching
mund something that is Paris show reports, for all the ed a middle-aged spread,
good In France, they fake this looking and up to date and designers cater for outsizes --
time business of being large much if you can't get fi, then boycott they have to. By the
There is a fat the shop, take dressmaking lear more seriously 'ladies' club, whose members cons Instead, and make your meet and sit down to outalze own clothes. You'll soon find meals to match their appeltes. the manufacturers will come They don't discuss the latest round to your way of thinking slimming ideas they're happy or go out of businÆSO. the way they are.
-HAZEL MEYRICK
Three hala by Ace Thaarun, featuring the Hawalt angle. From left to right; "Papale",
a turban in hibiscus velvet; “Aloha", also lu hibiscus velve! with fur trhaming; and á veli vet turban "Iluapała”.
BOYS'
Low-caloried Chicken Casserole
By IDA BAILEY-ALLEN
HICKEN
cream
"Casserole is easy to
hit
becẞuse
I
undiluted Use evaporated mille instead 01 cream in making it,”
prepare and always a
"Chicken mest also is low in when we give a buffet fat compared to other meats
dinner," remarked my such as beef, lamb and pork,”
I added. daughter, Ruth Castelli.
chicken "Roasted breast contains the leas; fat ot We were having a pleasant all meats." chat in the kitchen of her home in Westport, Connecticut, as she prepared a tray supper for her iwo small daughters.
we
"Then I'll get chleken breastá for the casserole when I enter taln. How much should I allow per person?"
**An
Bounce
serving of
"Most of the couples entertain are watching their chicken breast is aniple and weight, Ruth continued, "so carries only 230 calories in they shy away from fried contrast to 177 calories In 8 chicken. But this casserole ounces of porterhouse steak.
when contains very itlle fat, although Besides,
both chicken tastes fich and creamy,, breast and the sick are cooked and boned, the chicken breast contains 1/3 more protein than tho porterhouse and from 1% to 3 times as much ribonvin ond niacin as in most
AND
GIRLS'
MAGAZINE
The Flying Instructors
→Teachers Had As Much Fun As Pupils-
.
By MAX TRELL HIRPIE SPARROW came to the window sill and called out loudly: "Knarf! Hanid!"
Knarf and Hanid, the Shadows with the turned-ubout names, ran to the window in see what Chirple wanted.
to him. he "Here!"
seld "You've gone and forgotten our wings!"
They found a whole flock of young birds young Sparrows, Swallows, Robins, Wrens
A
and
even few Chickens--wailing behind some bushes for Pixie O'Scowl and his assistents.
was like a The flying class regular class in school except that it was out in the open and he most of the Mother and Father
birds were there to help.
was
too
Pixie McSnooze sleepy to remember where had left them, so Pixie O'Scowl begged Knort and Hanid to keep their eyes on Pixie MeSnooze for a minute and be sure not to to
let him fall asleep. Then he darted back to O'Cheer Hall to find the package
of wings. Meanwhile. Kaart and Hanid..
McSnooze. kept shaking Pixie But it did no good, he fell fast asleep.
"Pixie O'Scow! asked me
two," Chirple said, Fink you "whether you want to help him Leach the birds how to fly."
They Can't Fly
Knarf was too astonished to spook. All Hank could say was:
By "But-bul-we can't
OUT- selves,"
However, Chirple Sparrow simply repeated Pixie O'Scowl's request; then away he few.
It was still very early in the morning. They found Pixie CrSeow standing Just outside O'Cheer Hall where the Pixies lived, deep down in the roots of the Old Ook in back of the garden.
that
Knarf and Hanid สรพ Pixie O'Scowl WAS yanking Pixie McSnooze by the hand, but MeSnooze just stood lean- ing against the trunk of Old Oak, yawning.
Sloopy Brother,
the
see to
"I'm certainly glad to
Pixie O'Scowl said you," Knarf and Hand. "I can't get this sleepy, brother of mine 10. help me tench the birds how to
fly.
"But we can't fly ourselves~~" Henid started to say again
"There's nothing to it," said Pixle O'Boowl.. "All you do is keep flapping your wings."
"Wings" Bald Knart.
have no wing”
"We:
Pixie O'Scrowi glanced around.
at Pixió Mosnooze.
"Let him sleep. He's no help to me.anyhow,' Bald O'Scow, "You'd better come with me."
So they left Pixie McSn0020, under the quietly slumbering tree, after they had covered him over with leaf to keep him warm.
Pixie O'Scowl attached the wings to the shoulders of Knart and Hanid. "Go ahead, start flopping them," he said.
The First Rulo
O'Scowl attached wings to the Shadows' shoulders.
cooked meats,
other
"These facts have just been released in a new study on the nutritional values of chicken conducted at Cornell Univer-
sily!
Chicken Casserole Westport: Wash, dry and section 2 (2 1b,) frying chickens (or use 2% 1bs. chicken breasts).
In a
paper or polyethelense bag, measure and mix 4. enriched flour, 11⁄2 tsp. salt, 1 Lsp, monosodium glutamate,
1 tsp.
top, pepper and powdered ginger. chicken,
Adú the
Shake until evenly coated. Lightly brown in buiter or margarine.
Arrange in inyers in a buttered
casserole with the following mixture: 3 c. thin sliced celery, c. sliced clean- ed locks or green onions, 2 c. sliced fresh mushrooms with chopped stems and 3 tbsp, rice. Pour in 2 (13% oz.) trist
Knart and Hanid did just as they were told. They flapped the wings! The next second they. found themselves speeding up into the air. Kaart inund it so pleasant looking down from high up, in the air that he forgot to too. "That's the first rule in My-evaporated milk and I un- down again. keep flapping and came right ing."
Always keep flopping" Pixie O'Scowl told Kaart and Handd. He told this to the young birds,
Rupert and the Old Hat-44
Fater Termutt can hardly speak. **B-but I will say it's impossible," he spluttera. *** Nobody can have burd of a lady cucko sitting on her own iness. Now yet of Mr. Cuckoo getting food for har.” "Yes,! paw's in't, it lovely," Rupert
ALL RIGHTH
sugh. "You're the frat man ever to me it, except for Odmadod. and he's hardly a man, is “hn 2. **- **Tcha, you're beyond nie, your Rupert. Tis xfi 'crany ́) "' «rice the bewildered, farmer as he strides sway. Mes: Bese too moves away'
sole-birda flp-10wards-them, NEJZATED
measure hot water to which tbsp. sherry extract has been In a few minutes, Knart and added. (Ruth uses dry sherry Hanid had learned to By beaut!to taste). Cover; bake 1% hr
of the In a moderate fully. They spent mosi
oven, 350 F morning teaching the young Serves 8 to B
birds to just keep flapping their wings but, strangely enough, this was more difficult than it seem- ed to be. Some of the young to lift them- birds managed solves a fow feet off the ground, then tumbled down again.
"Keep flapping... keep flap- ping!" Pixie O'Scowl,
and Hanid kept shouting,
Knarf
Dinner
Zucchini Vinaigrette on Lettuce Chicken Casserole Westport Buttered Rlee Green Beena Strawberry or
Peach Shortcake Coffee Tea Milic __All_Menturements Age Levei, Zucchini Vinaigrette; Wash and thin-alice 11b, zucchini Do Finally the Пying lesson was not poel. Cook in 14" belling, When Knari and Hanid salted water about 20 min, or returned with Pixie O'Scow to until bile-tender. the Old Oak, they found Pixle
over.
Mix together thep, salbd oil, MeSnooze talking to a Bumble 1⁄2 tbsp. each vinegar and lemon Bec.
Juleo, tsp. saltep. pepplay dep, powdered dil or "I'm glad we don't have to 1 lap, minced freste mint and 1. teach all you bees to fly," Pixie bop, pickle relish, woW AND McSnooze was saying "We'd plin into the succhini. BervO never go through with our hotar" "bhill and work."
fettuce, Serves dansa lapped. Our work," muttered Pixle
* Trick of the Chat ::- O'Scowl. When do you ever
Stir : 2" drops. Talasod kotó each cùp bê butband rice.