This Funny World
THE CHINA MAIL,
FRIDAY, JUNE
1956.
Page
14-19
McNaught Byrdnete, Loe,
***Trained me hitelf !**
YOUR BIRTHDAY
BOHN 12
Yum!
FRIDAY, JUNE 8
ste erwaladly
traf Srat1
to varying TAMMIN
Muncke
SommetjoseR YOU then aques, VOUS *La muen personals But the mu
nat over-uplaja patje
fion ublow- You will tobably
ܪ Th?![hmm
Think Y
prida tu
the made id
yun
ÍCable extent upon
health
But ke
1 yemi we overtured yang ten tar be highly depremec
borused thick
YEH
H
wonewhi
JACOBY
ON BRIDGE
Club Squeeze "Makes Slam
By OSWALD JACOBY
WHEN John Ditto, veteran bringe instructor at Chicago's Central YMCA, bid and made six spades on this till a recent tournament he carned a top score because the other declarers who reached the lam either wert careless with trumps or folled to execute o squeeze play.
West opened the king of dia- monda and then shifted to the three of hearts. Seeing that he
NORTH
742 VAK
Q702 4K 873
WEST
105
EAST
913
❤ 13
By STELLA
AK 1084 -J1004
❤ 30042
B63
SOUTH (D)
MAKQJI
IN ATTIVÍNK Htw Permvere relate * You InnovationA, will come when you and the home ah be properly recognized
You have 46 110 stefanity mak kang trienda KELIOTEKAN,
De
1
VI185
East
8
WOMANSENSE
اوه
A two-man one-woman fashion team makes a critics' tour of the London shops to see what are the latest fashion ideas that might appeal to you
IN SEARCH SUMMER.
By EILEEN Ascroft
THE male point of view is
+3
Tworth listening to even on clothes, perhaps es pecially on bench clothes.
OF
Antill does not like oven gan- dals for the beach--that's why he chose Tony's terry towelling lip-ons, with rubber BOICE In red or navy, with white they were one of our best bargains.
On the
whole, I found спотноц Improvement masculine holiday wear this sea son. Botter value, more imagina. tion and les bad taste.
an in
My touring team-com- prising top fashion photo- grapher John Antill and top fashion artist Rix, and my self was on the hunt first
liked the black shorts (just for something different in
shade
longer than last year) bench clothes. Cameraman
CLS a foll to coloured shirts. And Antili led the way. "I like how I welcome the sports shirts In bright with long sleeves, very practical things in bright pineen. Let's 20 for something really colourful,”
Lu
see women
Su Amal's
Brst
AQ2
for
South 1
Neither side vul
West
ས་ Pasa Pass
North 2
Pass
3
Рова
Рова
THES
of
a
4 N.T. Pass Pass U A
Pass
Pucci, It
Pas
poplin shin and
pau
f you are Kitely toward all warn ConstFul You have men The mortal TEM ind J will make
Your family love hoal or not have
lite mater
happy and ex- from the valley, you
Tooted ag we is goÓ Jealth quis Then the
Артимны Шили txort on this date Lenin to Bran work inka
Selantar beolth good
YEA
David Porte USN Jou Grey and whbubiy Shu-te s
Douth
Robert Bailey Rupe
Samuel 14-Jem, Stevenwat CARINA te werd a per- Bataly
Sully. VOLVORMITTAJ you 306 1 del t
Well, arests - 206 1.41 time to recomiende Vou beliefs
}{+++ C Thruntzak.
**
Leist
pertekl
work-actor world
CESTE LE LÂya
A 215
ext Bul
put you duti
W114~#+
++
will
woth Que dinary
Munte and the art prolabiy ore the you will be happi- since orginality may intade sheud if yemas times, Tas Cheweest if recognitio
GEMINI
You Y and whit
1
11
»
ויי זיו!
וי עלן
And what the mata have An
seinel voUT Tershaus ant and trust the torre- sponding pananginigh. Let you birth- day or be your air quide
SATURDAY, JUNE 9
27-June
71) *** your best afforin en benache i beluk of ornITIATE Things Should be height und
sday воздору
CROSSWORD
•
1. They're
UAK...
(-5)
2.
ACCOM just me Engilaka me
Carten." maybe or
Do
(3)
10. o bas, it would sooth, a potent
in London. (4)
11. Pun oraily tonag.). (9)
12. Capture. (a)
13. The man for good size? (3)
DANCER
22-July (June Important legal nutlein sday need
t You fulf
Coulder
Dal
to make (32)
24-Aug 231 -
en und be rely V rel Tw
LEO July Floational, cultural and intellectuei activities are especially favored t theme Make progres
VEROH TAUR, 20-Sept. Family mallest pt. expectatly in the relation to the romantinity atel wat helghamardanud, are stred
LEBIL
Pass Opening teadm♦ K
coaletn't ruff two hearts safely in dummy, Ditto began by draw- ing two rounds of trumps. Then he took the other high heart, at to his hand with th ace of elabs, and mulled a heart in durarny.
Slive
West couldn't follow but
fortunately, sult
also. couldn't overruff, the station Ditto ruffed a dia- wa elen monet and led out his remain a trumps.
When the fast trump was led, South's other cards were a heart Dummy had and two clubs.
three elubs and the queen of diamonds. West had to reduce to three cards ahead of dummy. If West saved the ace of dia- he would have to throw monds,
club; and if he tried to saye 24-0cl 23a3 the clubs, he would have to
throw the Bee of diamonds Either way, he would establish
Trick for the dummy.
You can make visible programm Bane really major objective today a wound. De energetie Don't waste
Lock KCORPIO
24-Now. 22) - Good fortune` should purme your
Decide Gethullen today
exactly
what you want and go out after A. SAGITTARIUS (Nov, 23-Dec, 22)—- Ikath public and private matters ZTE
pressed, A
combination of
may bring you unprecedented
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan
1x 221
x1
-- (az
If your job as to meet the pulse.
then this to one of the times when you benefit from the practice
21-Feb. AQUARIUS (Jan.
197
If you have to work today, be sure that you val attention to your best Lalents let the home know
NK YOU are t
hors
PISCEN (Feb. 20-MKT. Z1) - Family Tre, expecially those how- ang to cho with endidren's events, are highly favoured just now
ARIER
z-Apr
20) - (MEAF, we house-hunting these day, you may just happens to find exintly the place you want, so take
**CARDSTñisen.
The bidding has been:
South Wert North
East
I Heart 2 Clubs 2 Diamondi Pasa
You, South, hold:
4AQ3 VAKJ4 +53 4K 395
What do you do?
A-Bld three no-trump. This Jung robld shows two stoppors In the enemy's suit and could – erably more than opening bid.
AmipturaS
TODAY'S QUESTION
The bidding has been:
North Fast
Bouth West
1 Heart 2 Clubs 2 Dmds. Pas
?
10. Breakfast companion. (91
17. A ittle sleep. (8)
18. River a Roman known.
(6)
20. Kim o, she asked. (4)
10)
2 Hearts Pass
TAURUS
bare
Year
(Apr.
21) - The outlook in ne. It is up to you
heer effort tri exe
expecially elt should warding
21-MAY
You, South, hold:
*TTHE
What do you do?
Answer Tomorrow
1. Ho
Down
L
190
21. Tire. (9)
22. Indicates a orato man,
3. Stares into doweru. (9)
oottengo
And Crotto in Bichly. (4-5)
Duta on. () Vital Esta
drawback | (9)
← This problem
pretend (4, 4)
J Det
Lost by Roman. (3)
King in tegend. (3)
1. 10 boote nometimes.
. Chat by $iva dancers. (81
12. We haven't
old
13. Bob Dok
children have
one
Job learn-
r
Jed
around. (01
16. Thin
Ret together.
TO)
3 Chesky. 197
Yesterday'a vndetteme
(3)
CHESS PROBLEM
By ROGER DIOT
Black, 7 pieces. .-
choice for
you is the all-Italian outfi e
Wr the right ki. ipel o it in a Kehte bridge store, muli-colourei rt!Mani
affar dested by Emlik
ราย consists of
sheria.
Worthing ton wents a boned, Mraphs 100
which has
elasticuled
With this Shirley
un
in
out
.
rucne busilate
wanted Fo 2. Has. ALAR
Muzy Bare
he picked oling model in rafia,
WE
..
Cinkum the camera- Harlequin the vily 177423 espada fire-and his colour "fur entrala brate places" green.
WIL
BOLD TONES
But we all liked the Hallan holi- Instance on thle year's
wonderful clothes. Those
the East put strug lones postels and wishy-washy Borals in the slude. There is nothing
with wrong
English design. Much of it is very good, but there is
definite ick of
elour sense,
Model mate
cavorty
Worthington's Tony
1
in hot sun.
Beach shirt (inside or out- side stacks) are not so goudily patterned us leat year,
Particularly I admired the
new washed-out blues and the rass buttons on tailored beach Nirts
Chief criticisms were gunst the tle and recit manufacturers. Why are summer-weight sucks n dievus stripes and designs? Why is it almost impossible to buy summery shantung [les?
GAY, COLOURFUL
Fashion
for drum-
looking artist beach Decorsaries, He
ble
at anything practical and dull "Holiday gimmicks should be may and gay."
Buy
So his girl in sketch No. 1 forget her eyebrow pencil -her eyebrows are now plas-
attached to her He and glasses
Something cheaper, but just cmusing, are the black sun- flusser in sketch No. 3, with floral design
lenses There
**Beach
shoca," Rix says, "have never been smarter and a mule cheaper." He sketched from Spain
(No. 7) in black towelling
rope scle, embroidered with yellow rama and flowers.
Italy tends a beach "fatty" in embroidered towelling, white
white rama,
Lace,
un-
multi-coloured across the and on
top of the the side pieces,
with ching earrings, Rix likes sunglasses in bold tarnishable sliver thread and colours and definite shape, ilke
are matching
the ones
in skelch No. 2, with shells, It has a useful elasticised
strap across the instep. their bright stripes and obade over the lenses,
smail
Hu chief complaint on glasses was expenSE, Anything unusia! with style was costly. He would Ripe to
Inexpensive original frames.
One of the best he picked out
yee
more
Fux's last choice wis AN Italian beach shoe in wood, with painted sides and a lemon rail
trimmed Instep strap.
with has a transparen! flowers
klipper, heel, like Cinderella's
Italion wears an Ruocco. He
shirt in red and white beach
thing cotton. Jum, the kind of
Antill-casual, I'd chose, sald comfortable and
corrtaining a raffia Bower. good coleur
to sketch (No. 4) has amusing TOMORROW: Ideos for the serrated
with suntan, Tony's quick-dry nylon boxer shorts are in royal blue.
edges, guaranteed to give the foce a "f"
BOYS' AND
seaside and the
country.
GIRLS' MAGAZINE
The Three R's And Pets
-Punch Explains Why School Is Not For Animals-
"My Scratch didn't," said Mr TRELL By MAX
Punch.
"She said she was busy mice, TNARF, the shadow-boy with day and night hunting
face,
K71 70OZ SAK Kurned-about pant, said chasing birds, singing on back to his sister Hanid: "Hanld," he fences, lapping up milk, picking said, "why don't cats and dogs dish bones, washing her and birds and crickels and Aghting with strange dogs... she didn't caterpillars and things like that and purring. No,
have a bit of time to go 10 go to school?"
Hanid looked at Knar! in sur- school and learn the Three R's. prise.
.BY. THE. WAY.
ROWDS
by
Beachcomber
of sightseers, 2 let.
were o go. shown the armour in the great hall of an ancient mansion, The owner of the house was acting as guide.
at Before you can say 140 percent being there will be a pipeline from Dijueva on the Gulf of Notubi- sneezdat to Damphunth on the northern shore of Lake Usllibil- tab, in the territory of the Oat And what of Rub-ud-Dubdub. Suddenly the man who had has the smiling, secretive Khur been hired to appear as a ghost of Khashdown and Getawch to
in the main bedroom came soy about all this? tearing down the stairs,
He
drew the owner aside and said he had seen a ghost in the room. him. The owner accompanied making
calculation the rapid
genuine
that if this
wore
ghost he would save a pound a
day--the fee paid to the hired
ghost, Alas for human hopest
Twenty Years al Uproar
His left-hand octaver had the force of a pile-driver.
(Music critic.) LLOWING for exaggeration,
On entering the room he heard he probably hit pretty hard: the genuine ghost say:
cried the hired
for
him with keys of reinforced
are you doing concrete,. As a critic.wrote:
ва
"Blow The great virtuoso Sichhammer me backwards if it isn't Harry!" had a special plano made "Tom!" "What The explanation turned out be that the owner's wife, un known to him, had engaged Tom. So, for that one day the sightseers got two chosis. Oill
I
"Those who expect from him
ol touch of the delicacy butterfly brushing the petals of a polyanthus are doomed to disappointment. At Axminster he played Schapvoll's "Merch Miliaire with such vigour that he and the instrument crashed the floor of the con-
White, 1 pieces, White to play: mate in two, THE reported discovery of oll
Solution to yesterday's in South Rabaab has sent, through problem
the Tot of Kitizlecthin hotfoot oest-hall and landed in a cellar alled with Junk. At Nether P-BS; threat 2: KL-K7 (dir to the little port of Wudulnik ch. 1
ABX-P; 2, K-K8; Bum In close pursuit is the Stowey he broke the plano P-KiṢi 2, Kt—KG (dle Rift of Sokkim, with a caval- two and hurled the pieces into cade of second-hand derricks. the orchestra pit with a haughty
1
chit
R
TARGET
How many
words of
C Tour: fetters
UAT
DIR
Y.
or more e
on
trom the latter in tite
the jere In king egen word the
Kich of the sinnan guares may be used. Dues only. Each word musl' contain the.... kurye: Mierin. thx igentry;
Trust one mine-letter word in the liat. No pturais; no foraigta words: '
no prober names, TODAYS
TARGET: 21 words, good;", ta words. „very spod); 31 4 words.. #rosilent, Holation tomOETWW.
YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION, Xpress engross ergon ärrsa: @veri sper gene beard: gost pone pore SOFEN, CODETE GOVKÁNINH: grmers grove se nest never more nor opse ugra ogrets oner over over ting for uzun bir Deney, Bera
· surpa Kerve even sever" SKIET
''orge, verze
Jaugh. Rubbish
ΑΝ
in
N experiment is being made in American offices with desite without ·drawem. · ·Pay- chiatrists say that drawers are always filled with rubbish, and that without them there will be no robbiah: "just :es, without bdskels there would be no waste-paper. I suggest that na paychiatrists) UND always filled witly rubbishy with", but them there would be far legs
|waste-pager ·
"And it was the same with Why is school only for my dog Spotty, children?" Knarf added.
Then Hanid said: "It's a very
"Who would watch the house
he went good Iden."
to school? Who "What is a very good idea, would bark when the bell rang? Honid?"
To Ask Advice "For cals and dogs and birds and crickela and caterpillars and other things like that to go to school," said Hanid. "I won der why they don't."
"That's what I wonder," said
Who would run and jump and wog his tail when the children came home from school if he went to school himself? So he couldn't learn his Three R'"
"What about the birds? Why didn't they go to school?" Hanid asked.
3-22
Panch asked Scratch why she didn't go to school
butterflies. They had no time left at all."
"But, Mr Punch," said Honid, Yot "children are busy, too. they go to school, don't they? They learn their Three R's”
Mr Punch nodded and smiled. "Children are different, my They aren't cats, they dear, aren't dogs, they aren't birds, or crickets, or caterpillars or any of those things.
They're children. And if they didn't go to school and
reading. 'riting and 'rithmetic, who would be able to read
who the books and
would #11 tha able to write letters and who would be able Mr to do all the adding and sub- "were too busy eating tracting and dividing and multi- cocoons, plying? Besides, school is fun! turning themselves into it really, Is":
"They were too busy chirp ing," said Mr Punch.
Too Busy Singing Just then Knarf and Hand noticed that their friend Mr.
"They were too busy singing, Punch, who was sitting in his of course," said Me Punch.
the erickets?" said easy chair on the other side of "And the room, wan listening to all Knarf. they said. They went over to got his advice about why dogs and cats and birds and crickets
Hanid said: "And why didn't and caterpillars (among other
the caterpillars go to school and go to school. things) didn't
Now that's a very curious learn reading, 'riting and 'rith thing" Mr Punch said. "I used "The caterpillars," said
metic?" to think about that myself when
I went to school. So one day I Punch, went up to my cat, whose name leaves and spinning wae Scratch, and asked her why and she didn't go to school and learn the Three Re. She looked puzzle. She had never heard of the Three R."
"Neither have I ever heard of
the Three I's,” said Knart to Mr Punch. What are they, pleaso?"
.
"Tho Threo R's, my boy." and Mr. Punch, "are reading, 'riting, and 'rithmetic.
Write A Laffer,
"I explained the Three B's to my cat Scratch and told her how very pleasant it would be If he could read a book and write a letter and learn to do But she just some figúTER, shook her head and said, wher didn't have the time, q
"Didn't have the timel Hant oxclaimedes, "Cats have ail the, tinos in the world!"
be
Journa
Rupert and the Winter Woolly-24
Now things happen so quickly inside the room lifts Rupert, and that Rupert breath to je stalen (gwir)1) hin out of the stage. Away. The sound of the whistle “ Up and up he la carried through han hardly faded whar Jack: Frost the old air, on and on, through. is whisked rost thak, window, Willối the? aky, spångsed?will atard..
·ând at the samne instant a ferlona · Isaac all; been allo? sudden • that wind that wema, to “dolné Krom Respect hardly are open his urias
THE
SUNSUIT
A MAN
CHOSE
Emerald green
wald
Photographer
Antill
Londo
Express Service.
ABOVE: For your eyes and your feet. a man's choice of this year's
BUJI
Artist RIX makes and glasaca
shoes.
THE IDEAL GIFT FOR
FATHER'S DAY
When he gets down on
all fours his Stretchway Belt goes right along
Cath him!
Pioneer.
It g-l-ve-s' up to one,
full inch with every movementi
"your"
LIFE