POCKET CARTOON

by OSBERT LANCASTER

"Darling, why is it called the Secret Service ?”

PARADE

FIGURE

The

i

THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, OCTOBER 8, 1955.

A COLUMN OF THE UNUSUAL ABOUT PEOPLE AND PLACES AND THINGS.

cloth-capped construction and building pro- silence,

have brought u new who con- gramme has been too much for turn to the 'mystery. OF FUN: Ogure

Yulso variety Mr L.J. Holloway, president One of them, former Major theatre audiences with laughter of the London Master Builders' Iwao Takakura, said he was when he plods onstage with (or Association.

the man who had charge of ibe without) his tools is no longer Addressing a lunchcout party treasure. He was trading it to the plumber.

at Mitcham, Surrey, he burst Japan for disposition. Takakura

THE against "this

ho Right now the lure of fun out

nonsense claimed

delivered Bose's Is Britain's building worker. Ho which evokes auch mirth from aches and the £300,000 to an

official drawn his

of the India Indepen- on gallery and stalls. least, pay (at singe) for not appearing on the

dence movement in Tokyo. building alie; for collecting his cup of ten; for laying a brick a day....

But the merriment at the men carryling out the nation's FC-

A British Crossword Puzzle

12

18

15

4

IS

16

17

18

119

20

21

√22

[27

ACROSS

a Wedteck (B).

8 Change (4).

9 Requested firmly (8).

11 Part of a car (8),

3 Incline (4).

1 Vied with (8)

+ Liberates (8).

li

19 Lake (4).

21 Guided (8).

15 Goes down (8).

26 Strdy (4).

27 Diragrees (8).

13.

26

DOWN

1 Assert (4).

2 Purched (4).

4 Encourage (4).

5 Bellow (4).

6 Cartuse (5).

7 Finished (0).

9 Veatured

(5).

10 Pattern (5).

12 Solltery (5).

14 Puck (5).

Lukewarm (5).

10

(5).

17 Flunges

Mediated (5).

24.

20 Ceremonial garments (5),

21 Cubes ured in gambling (4).

22 Repose (4).

23 Excursion (4),

24 Molst (4).

YESTERDAY'S CROSSWORD,--Across; | Routed, 4 Roads, ? Princent, 6 Chup, Lances, 11 Emerged, 13 intrude. 16 Random, i Robol, in Returned, 20 laste, 21 Dreads. Bawn: 1 Repel, 2 Tonie, 1 Dressed, 4 Rescue, Arranged, Sapped, 10 Notables, 12 Merited, 13 mest. 14 Untrue. 18 Nurse, 17 Modas.

This official was repente:lly warned against revealing its existence for fear of Allied re- .ho Soon afterwards prisals. official vanished.

BURGESS expounds

in the Athenaeum

WHISPERING GAL- LERY. By John Lohmann. Longmans. 21s. 342 pagos.

S with this ridiculous and

The building trade was sub- jected to "constant, niggling and 'often Judicrous criticism," he aserted. "All the time we-are fuced untair criticism. We have to work in the open. Our jobs are there for the inspection of the world. Everyone sees us. So it a single man on single job is reen drinding cup of tea, the whole building Industry dammed for incompetence.

"All the time we are at work 'Big Brother or is it le Sis.er's watching. So the Inefficiency Blory golos cur rency. Somebody tells borty else who writes to the paper. The music hall takes up the story."

some-

NO MEAL After TICKET

generations

for

on

YAYS Lehmann casually this page 804 of autoblography, "I en- countered Guy Burgess one evening in the Athonneum, with characteristic

of solleftudo unfalihful wives, and British husbands are digging in boisterousness he exclaimed: their toes. In divoree cases they "The trouble about Wystan are refusing to accept guilt as (Auden), Christopher a matter of course, merely be-

Stephen cause I 19 the "gentlemanly" (Isherwood) and

(Spender) In that they haven't the fogglest notion what politicians are really like!"

gesture to a woman.

Furthermore, the result of

this attitude Indicates that wives nowadays are almost as unfaithful as husbands.

women partners

GOOD Britons are eating

The forthcoming quarter's then FEEDING: more

ever divores sults in London reveal before. That that nearly za many men as means the whole nation, not

accusing arc

their merely moneyed Individuals,

of breaking the 10 Average daily diet lo Britain is marriage. Yet only a score of 3,120 calories compared with 3,000 Ave years bgo, 2,880 la 1947, and 3,000 prewar, accord-

to the test figures. This increased are has not been achieved by putting more dull, starchy food on the table.

Becoming very choosy, the

people meat, tea.

Main

consuming are eggs, butter, sugar

more

and

fuctor worrying the doctors is that people may not be eating enough bread. Unless they are offsetting a lock of bread by drinking milk, they will not be getting sufflefent calcium.

TREASURE Indians living in

Tokyo

dc. are MYSTERY

manding an an- swer to the 10-year-old mystery

years ago there were three times

more women than men.

aut

The reasons for this change?

Divorce court lawyers point that husbands, faced with

Nor, as it turns out, had the politicians the fogglest notion what Gay Burgess was really like.

John Lehmann

(1) Stephen Spender,

a

"with a huge head of curls, loped bo- side me in the wild winter landscape"

and spoke of (2) Burgess was only one member Audon and (3) Isherwood, who an extreme red cecouric mem had settled in Berlin in stork ber-of the gentration which

poverty. Then there was during Lehmann has observed

(4) David Gascoyne "the a lie whose main stages were introspective suffering of

happy, spelous.

Themes-stilo

highly strung sensibility" in his expression. One day, in a Bat in Paris where David was vainly trying to give precision to his subtle metaphysical mean 03, Bremen rushed in, waving axes and malting the floors shake under their ponderous boots.

"We all rushed about looking for the fire, except David, who silent remained qutvering and

col erlenda, witty friends,

well-stalled; Elon with

friend clever

Quintin Hogg the present high cost of living. (who has become Lord Hall-

sacrifice

explosive force cannot readily

one-sham)-"some t third of their incomes, for ever in him that was never perhaps, as a worthy act. Their pletely under control

a naturally wom private incomes, which in past conflict with decades made this easy, have and easily wounded heart." now shrunk.

ticket.

and

Eton tension

com-

in

on the soin in the midst of this vortex of purposeless activity."

Pilgrimage

Spender

that

an

Horo

SUTER

an eccentriș în anguished generation; with Audon, Isherwood, Spender ho was observod by John Lehmann: and is perhaps the one among

know where them all who

was going

BOOKS

by

ho

GEORGE MALCOLM THOMSON

is De- danger of turning

and the myth of the proletarian ments of its kix-it saviour; some went to the Span- petually in

sh war; some wrote bilter pro- into pagandist poetry.

of

a History of Our Times: public declamation instead of It is short personal confession. Christopher Isherwood

shonleg wrate of individuality; (from America, where he had humour. gone on the "quote" of immi-

But it can be taken as a use- am in the grants)-"I myself

Lehmann's I have ful case-history of most Godawful moss. discovered, what I didn't realise generation; the heroes who were till trying to have their moral cake or what I wasn't before,

and

Over cat it swooning now, that I am a pacifist."

Sky- It was May, 1936, Christopher Mozart in Salzburg and had loft self-discovery

unemployed in rather ing with the

Vicana.

Neno at them, sycopt late.

Lehmann, with some dimetty, perhaps Guy. with his char- bolaterousness, hed got himself a job as the secret acteristic Viemma correspondent of a Come the fogglest notion where they aunist controlled movement were going. But low were wise like David, cainst war and Fascism. It did enough to remain,

"quivering and silent on wonders for his rentier guilt.

His

suffers sola" In the autobiography from the usual defect of docu- vortex.

Husbands icel

also that women now have good chances

anecdotes of working to support

In one of the few them-

that occur in his book, Lehmann selves. Primarily, however,

speaks of the tensions generated that the Little Woman, if she

Assured by the exclusion of at Eton by seeks another, should not con- females.

bod escaped

the When the headmaster, Germany tinue regarding her

of mortal sickness and gulit 13 ex Cyril Alington, took

the

Lehmann Westem civilisation, his sermon in husband as a permanent meal the feel of

of went to Salzburg chapel Oscar Wilde's story

where the the

"scarcely sight of the beautiful Tyrolean Happy Prince. and any boy dared to look at the young men and girls" kept his of Boude- ftecing from COLOUR.

brunettes are out. opposite pews' excop!: in a, eyes from the copy

in his hand. He was rigid way: blushes latre The colour now-glazed,

In mounted involuntarlly to In- in Bedin in time to hear adays has to be something

in a bar on "The Reichstag's between. Something that ranges numerable checks. No one know friends remark

and night, what was coming next either side of

red. British women, explained a veryone was thinking exactly fre!"

After that. there Was leading hairdressir last week, the same thing."

nothing for it but to make the pilgrimage to Moscow.

of the £300,000 treasure of the Indian Quisling, Subbas Chondra Bose, who died in an RED'S THE Blondes air crash while

Singapore

after

three days World War II ended.

The fortune vanished when Bosc-Japanese puppet who set up a Provisional Government of Free India in 1943-was killed In Formosa.

open

п

the

midst of

the

It isn't like The Caine

B

to

MARJORIE MORNINGSTAR, with the glamour of the stage By Herman Wouk. Cape. and, more ardently, with one of the stage'a more resounding 16s. 638 pages.

cads, Noel Airman (previously Saul Ehrmann). WOUK, at 40 years of age, is To conquer the footlights on Win a spot. As Humphrey Marjorie changes the family

Bogart's

he novelist,

sold name

from Morgenstern 3,000,000 copies of "The Caine Morningstar; to win Noel, she Mutiny. Now 3,000,000 critics yields her virtue. But what le are now demanding colour on After Eton came Cambridge,

ere waiting to declare Indig technically lost can be morally their heads, and more and more and doubts about a career. His Almost before he was aware nantly of his new Calme."

of his new novel: "This recovered. gest

that another Indian Na- are visiting, their hairdresszis 19 histe Rosamond wrote to him, or i, Lahojann had been swept is tionalist made off wi.h the get it

Last we see of Marjorie she They may spare their anguish. Even the nicest women no don't want you to go into into the revolutionary currents and £300,000 in gold, jewels,

Schwartz, no the Diplomatic. I can't bear you

that raced

a happy. Europe. He Majerle Morningstar is nothing is Mrs ECTOSE

of valuables given by Iri- longer think it's a bit shocking to in hope!

on being inwardly torn."

of was one of the generation Hke The Calne. It is, however, polsed, good-looking womon to dye their hair. They just

John belonged well-heeled aesthetes who deve-

40 with a doughter of 14 named Sort like countless carlier

that can bet. feel a change now and again to an anguished generation. He doped the guilt of the rendier novels. It tells the story of a Deborah. You does them as much good as sought release in the company class (his term) and political young middle-class Jewish girl Marjorie keeps e close watch

of the young poets of the day: longings. Some turned to Marx in New York who falls in love on Deborah.

Now, new investigations sug-

other dians in the Far East.

Statements by three former Japanese

army officers, break.

ing

A self-imposed 10-year

holiday.

Back To Nature

BY HARRY WEINERT

7

it

It is long and for stretches, Is fot. But it has some well- constructed scenes and some characters lovingly and comical- ly taken from the life. Wouk is writing about scenes he knows.

VIGNETTES OF LIFE

THE COUNTRY

IS NO

PLACE

FOR

JANGLED

NERVES - IF IT ISN'T

SNAKES, ITS SKUNKS.

́"YOU KNOW MAVIS AND I CAN'T

EAT BERRIES— BUT OH NO,

YOU SAID THESE ARE DIFFERENT--

THESE ARE WILD?

T

· SD-SECOND BOOK

EVERY revac, with one exception that 1 bave ever pai on at the Folies Bergère has 13 letters in its title. The first year 1 did not do it intentionally : bui the only real_” (lop'

of my career at the Folies occurred when I broke away from this involuntary custom.

then 1 have

SINCE

wisely remained faith- tal to my 23-letter sitio ;. A even make a point of having the word "Folle" in' it.

IT is not always easy. but a regular patron kan sent me a handy list of 150 titles fulfilling these require menta.

THAT · should *EC US well into the twents. first century,

from The Folies Bergers." by director Pes Dervat. thethuen, 125. dd.).

AND IF IT ISN'T

FOG ITS THUNDER

AND

LIGHTNING,

IF IT

ISNT

BUGS 'IN THE

FLOWERS

IT'S

WORMS

IN THE

APPLES.

(YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY THE BEAUTIFUL SUNSETS-

IN FACT, YOU CANT TAKE AWAY ANYTHING —–

EXCEPT MAYBE A CASE OF HIVES.

NEVER

LIVE BY GENERAS FEATURES

CORK THE WORLD RIGHTS RESERVED

THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS SOLITUDE SIT DOWN FOR TWO MINUTES AND THE LANTS ARE CRAWLING

UP YOUR SPINE

'WHY IS IT THAT, HORNETS

INHABIT ONLY THE NICEST SPOTS 7

WONET

THE NATURE BOY

- WHO

GETS POISON IVÝ.

CREECH.

··AND IF I WASNY, A GENTLEMAN I'D.

TELL YOU WHAT

I THINK OF MOTHER NATURE /

COMIC-OPERA . PRISON

Vienna, Oct. 7.

A decision by the Aus- trian Supreme Court vir tually gives prison warders the right to grant convicts leave of absence from prison and other privi-

leges.

Josef Melcher and Johann Urt, warders at Villach prison. In Carinthia, were sentenced by a district court judge to 10 and 10 months hard labour on a charge of "abusing their official DOWEB.

They

had allowed convlots

out on parole to yisit bars"and:: cinemas.

They had attended “mixed parties in the cells'nt which there were drinks and in prison.

orchestra played.

Conditions at this come opera' prison were brought to light when Villoch polico BETENÍ- ed a drunken man trying to sell a bicycle. He turned out to be a |prisoner "given leave" by the

two ·warders, and. their trial. was the result of his

of this dia-

covery.

Alter

their conviction, the two wandora appowied

Supreme Court. And to evoryTM body wry Including their own, surprise, their « conviction quiabad, London

was

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