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THE CHINA MAIL, FRIDAY, AUGUST 12, 1955.
THE VOICE FROM BEYOND
A
Stukas.
NYONE who served at sea in the early days of the last war will have vivid memories of the dive- bombing attacks by the German
During the prewar days we, on our side, had developed similar tactics, but unfortunately when it came to the test tho enemy targets were few and far between. Anyhow, it was during our early experi- ment in this dive-bombing that the main incident in this story took place
My No. 2 and I had taken off from an aircraft carrier to try out a new sight. We each carried practice bombs and the idea was to make alternate dives on un aluminium flare which I had dropped as target.
On reaching our height, I waved No. 2 away to await his turn, eased the stick forward and put her into
an almost vertical dive.
was
Down-down--down-at 500 I pressed the release, pulled up into a steep climbing tum, and looking over my shoulder saw a white puff of smoke in the middle of the flare. A bull's eye. Money for old rope. I glanced up and there No. 2 heeling over into his dive. There he went screaming down and heading straight for the tar- now, Don't leave it too late 100-200-Look out" Crash!
As I circled over the spot, a wheel and a few bits of wreck age
bobbed up to the surface and that was all.
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One of the worst
DID IT HAPPEN?
defect due to the unusually steep spring dive.
were
ranean.
There he went - screaming down and heading straight for
CRASH! the target
could help, that I couldn't very
well refuse."
Shorty
Did this tale really happen? Is It FACT or FICTION? All the stories in this series could be true-but can YOU pick out the truth ? Answer to this story will be published tomorrow.
look
"I tried desperately to
Even then I thought little of like someono who had never it. It was only a small plate, allow for seen an aeroplane in his life, just big enough to but it was no good.
Mother minor adjustments without re- was already pointing to me and moving the whole cowling, but nodding.
. stronger locking device obviously required. Just one of the inevitable teething troubles one expects in any new type of aircraft.
"The medium seemed to sense what was going on in splie of her closed eyes. 'Would you like to ask a question?'
"At that
was
At the same time, regulations that all aircraft must
I would moment have given anything to be able decreed
10
Winky
up
some innocuous
for
question calling 40 easy non-committal but the
pught which had been up-
permost in our minds seemed out blot to everything else."
What went wrong?
wriggled uncomfort- ably in his chair. "I won cruise to the Mediter- strange sort of set-up," he went on "Mostly old Indies except girl, For the second time in their A few days later there was a for one rather attractive
door and there who turned out to be the my service all aircraft of that par- knock at
medium.
a while After a
they grounded stood Shorty nervously twid- dimmed the lights and she went ticular type
No. 2, lling his cap, "Could he speak off into a trance. Everyone else while I and my new
leaned forward expectantly, but long pauso dur- "Shorty" made exhaustive tests to me in private?"
I sat back in my corner trying ing which the hard not
to appear sceptical, girl swayed to and at the same time longing tu and get the whole thing over and started to done with.
to try to find out what had gone Belag so soon after the leave
period I naturally
suspected woman trouble, but far from it "It's about the crust,"
wrong.
But we could prove nothing, and again we out our Again
dives, nireraft through similar but they took it as good as gold without a sign of any structural
fine art.
He didn't seem to want to go on, but after I'd settled him in a chair and given him a cigar ette, he took a big gulp and out it came.
A trance
"died
wenkness.
Eventually the powers that be
possible came to the only conclusion, "human error," and the no-fying ban was removed. Months went by during which we developed dive-bombing to a
"My father," he said, No further incidents.
the same years ago and since then And yet, in spite of all evidence, nothing could persuade my mother has become a terribly me that No. 2 had had a black- keen spiritualist, and is always
CITOT of trying to get in touch. out or had made an
that work she persuaded me to go to Judgment-he just wasn't
a seance. I didn't want to a bit. sort.
dis- I don't understand those sort of We finished the cruise, embarked for a short leave, then things, but she was so keen on
the lden and so certain that mechanical flew back
I flew back to the
aircraft one of the carrier and made worst deck-landings on record.
That night, as I tossed and turned in my bunk, I sill couldn't believe it was true. Not only was No. 2 a great personal friend but 2 Arst-class pilot with hs cool a brain as you could find in the Fleet Air Arm. The very thought of his having misjudged
height his absurd, there could only be one solution
some
Was
ΟΠ
board
for the
Last
There was a
shake.
fro .and
very and
"It was a bit hot and I think "He's i must have dozed off. Anyhow,
suddenly felt mother digging it's very dim-
at me.
TICW
ap-
by.
Anthony
Kimmins
KEMMINS
CAPTAIN ANTHONY
'spent both world wars in the Navy and tinished off the last as Chief of Haret Information in the Pocific. between, he wrote Whlie Parents Sleep and other mleys, mad he has daca produced and directed such films es Mine Qwa Executioner and The Captain's Paradiso. Fifty rour this year, he has a wife and heo children and lives in Kensington. He was awarded the QA in 1946.
always be grounded while any modified- Von' is put in hand. A few days later we were back in the air and the trifle Was banished from my mind.
But now months
later,
as Shorty alam- med my cabin door, every de tail of that dive on Northoli carpe rushing back, Could that bo the answer?
I ran up to the hangar and
climbed
Yes,
the
carry the
ne in the ribs and found to my cult
my aircraft. horror that everyone was look-parently something.... I can't into
would moke out what came loose lipstream
plate mighty close to the wind- He's very indistinct,' droned ...and hit. him.'"
screen, and if one was leaning a medium, so I think he can the noi thier a short
Shorty got up from his chair bit to one side.... time ago. Yes, something to do and picked up his cap.
The aircraft log books, in with flying
..he seems to
"It sounds
so durned dilly which every detail of modifice- salch in think there is someone in this
cold blood. tions and so on are entered, had room who used to fly with now
But I thought you'd like to been returned, to our shore bane,. know." him."
so there was nothing for it bui Shorty stubbed out his
to curb my impaticoce until we cigarette. "No wonder the old
flow off at the end of the cruise, fadies were all looking at me. I was the only possible.'
LOVE, KHRUSHCHEV, AND COMRADE KOVACS
HUMOUR BEHIND THE
IRON CURTAIN
INCE the visit of the
Soviet delegation headed
By JOHN CLEWS
love. In was taboo, vas quite
And with that he was gone.
And what did I And? First
As the door closed I sat very still. Why the devil hadn't I that due to wear, No. 2's engine thought of this before? Why hadn't
cowling had been replaced just I remembered the first before the accident, And Beyond-,
time those particular
were grounded? +
aircraft
ly and far more important that the replacement cowling drawn from the ship's stores had I had been ferrying one of been one of a batch of assorbed the earliest to come out of the epares sont direct from
the
makers for deck-landing accept makers to the aircraft carrier. once trials, and my route
had what's more, that particular taken me over Northolt, then an batch of stores had been in RAF fighter station.
transit at the time the modifica- tion was ordered,'
:
New toy
"
He just wast that sort,
WORLD COPYRIGHT, RESERVED
DID IT REALLY HAPPEN?
YES
NO
I loft it at that. There seemed no has just turned up in Hungary.
point in trying to find a At a party meeting the lecturer
It was a lovely day, and as
scapegoat, and I am sure No. 2 was assuring the audience that looked down at the airfield I would have hated me to do so, Nikita by
-Comrade Kovacs
But did he timidly the Communists were producing knew
want to tell us to
that all the RAF pilots an old subject
the back of the more goods at lower prices. But would be looking up at this new what happened? walked from President Stalin's Khrushchev to
days this
his Fleet then
room and asked: "If there are one listener kept shalding
Air Arm typé and making Your guess is as good as mine, Tito in Yugoslavia, a story Courtship
sultably caustic remarks. "All-But personally I have always has been going the rounds seriously presented as the sulter really so many cows, where is head in disagement. Finally
pressing his claim with pro-
the beat and the milk? If there the lecturer old stand it no right, I'd show 'em," I said to felt a warm glow in my firm in Polish circles. According duction success, while his be is really so much poultry, where longer. He leaned over and myself, and to the best of my conviction that he didn't make
An adroit
are the eggs?" The party sece asked: "Why do you keep disability put her through her an error of judgment, · to this story, Khrushchev ved parried with
further output
Lary. declared the meeting at en agreeing like this?"
paces, finishing with a steep had a length of English cloth challenge to a
competition.
end and said the would answer
"Well," came the reply, dive and beat-up of the tarmac. which he wanted making up
Now this is changed, and
this most valuable comment the "whenever I go
round the Into a suit. Well known for Szpilki can hit
out at the following weck
shops. there are fewer goods As the speed mounted and his corpulence, he went to a zealous but short-sighted party
At the next meeting the party then over."
the flying wires started screamt- ques-
make a serious mis- Ing there was a sudden, com- "You Moscow tailor's for a fitting. secretary who storms at a girl
comrade:
"Don't try to get out secretary answered the
He take, Comrade," replied thepletely unexpected "swish." After measuring him, the of it, Comrade. You have dis- tions of Comrade Kovacs.
ominously. "You don't know whether I saw it or tailor said: "I am sorry, honoured the name of our or said that Hungary had 1,270,000 speaker
whistled Comrade Khrushchev, but ganisation. I myself saw Com- cows, whose meat went to the should go round the shope less Just heard it, something-a quile
while the and rend the
more small something-had papers
post my head. A moment later are too big for the rade Pietrzyk secretly squeezing workers' canteens,
milk wont to the hospitals. Hur carefully,"
had forgotten all about it in length. I cannot fit you."
gary had 6,800,000 pigs, the pork
the thrill of showing off my new Travel Around two after Khrush-
from which went to the con- A day or
toy, and it wasn't until I landed, the eggs of chev had arrived in Belgrade he
sumers, Similarly, Some of these jokes travel the 18 million hens went to the Curtain story of all comes from: pointed out that an inspection But perhaps the best Iron and one of my ground crew took the material to a Yugo around, for it is common prac- slav tailor and again asked to tice for
market. East European
« scientific meeting in Britain plate on the engine cowling was be fitted, explaining that his
The party secretary ended bis where a British Communist missing, that I remembered the Moscow tallor had found him satirical papers, such as Szpilki
in Rumania, to re- speech and asked if there were sympathiser, explaining or Urzica
West Belgrade talior too big. The
have happened. measured the cloth and then print cartoons from the Soviet any more questions. A voice Bhat Europeans attacked of incident and gured what must Krokodil without revealing the shouted from the rear: "Now we German rearmament but never looked him
and down. fact. Thus up
the Krokodil story know where the meat, mitic and that in Eastern Germany, sald "You may be a big person in about the man looking at a eggs are, but what wo don't that different countries had dif- Moscow," he said, "but you are dilapidated bullding. asking know is where
Comrade ferent social conventions and only a small person here. I a
is not a convention in coun- will have no difficulty in fitting when was it going to be re- Kovacs."
another story of this tries of Eastern Europe paired only to receive the reply that it had just been built, has nature started in Poland and criticise their Governments." You"
so far appeared in one or two joke, complete with the original East European papers as a local Russian picture!
you
Off The Record
This sort of joke is quite de Anitely off the record, but there are many like it. Humour be-
your
hand....
the
There is no doubt that the
hind the Iron Curtain is a very "underground" jokes also get interesting-and funny-thing, There are two kinds of jokes, carried across the borders, es- ofcial and unofelal. Official pecially as they are repeated In the programmes of the anti- Jokes have a purpose. They are barbed, and aimed at minor in- Communist Radio Free Europe, dividuals and deficiencies. They whose broadensts from Munich never
attack official polletes, have many clandestine listeners for that
forbidden
In all the Iron Curtain coun- in Communist society, but they do tries. In fact, there is quite a
Yet
Different
ZILCH, ZUMSI
GO TO SCHOOL
From JAMÈS COOPER
New, York. That means a winter
nummer.
to
five
reveal many weaknesses be basis for the admittedly apocry-TF JOHN has zumsi sloogies o'clock shadow at three pm, in sides being, often, very phal story of the little girl who
taken WEB humorous.
Into the Turda station
know her
Pogonatomist: on expert on
אין
"
and James has zilch, how
For instance, the
Polish Street
in many slopgles do they have beards, polico satirical paper: Szpilki, recently Bucharest.
together? The answer is "She is lost," said the police gerf sloogles.
} IN ONE DAY 72 New York lampooned the notorious rigidity
policemen have resimed to of many minor Communist man, "she doesn't
No, this is not gibberish. It_La ofcials in
a dialogue between name or where her parents live.
Starting pay £28 a wook, is two of them in which one said, What shall we do?" The duty-a new method of teaching arith become fremen.
metic being tried at Dearborn the same but firemen can take "and thus, according to party onscription might be broadcast High School, Mic
officer suggested that directives, you should act in-
School principal Otto Olsen has pare-time jobs forbidden to the radio. Overhearing, dependently, develop the inilla- over
that the old-fashioned polloemen. tios with them....'
rades, If you want to send a turns
over the radio, send it apples and James one of have an average score of 108, To which the other replied: report Yes, Comrade,
but with res to Radio Free Europe. It's the fuse pupils because they think pect to the Independence of only station my parents listen action. when will we receive to!" dincatives on this topic from
five of the masses and cement the little girl piped up: "Com a thoot John having..., two OLFEES: throughout, thờ. U.S..
ZORIC DRY CLEANING the Central Committoo?"
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Another cartoon from Szpilki had shown up a new approach
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more about apples than about day a survey. That makes both problem. So he has sub Prezident Eisenhower and my-
* for malf feel better, stituted zlich, xurma, and gart ong two and three and aloogles and quins for apples and orange ish picture, has been
THE KIDNAPPERS, the Bri This story, slight as it is, is
Says he: "The non-meaningful somewhat grim when the pos- six words help the student, nominated for the Americas Bible penalties for listening to realise he is dealing with neither 1983 award, for the foreign ftim auch Western stations are re-apples nor sloogtes but abstract that has made the greatest co membered. Equally grim is the mathematicel symbols. reptat alory of a Local Com
H
tribution, to International good
A WHILE" We are on uniMATINS
will and sandewadding.
theniet meeldis in Hungary, W which the party adoretary, spoke on ebonomic affairs, fold the audiendo
That
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BENNY HILL
Did yesterday's story--The Man an the Berth, by, Dan Montgomery an actually happen ? "The answer ins YKS.
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