POCKET CARTOON | by OSBERT, LANCASTER
"Darling, I know I'm most terribly silly, but just why are we all so mad keen on
reunited Germany?"
THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, AUGUST 6; 1955.
IT'S A HECTIC LIFE
WITH FATHER
A
NORMAN DOUGLAS.
SELECTION FROM HIS WORKS, Introduction by D. M. Low. Chatto and
Windus; Secker and War. burg. 25s. 394 pagos.,
LITTLE money has made me Inzy, said Mr Keith. "But I do some thinking and a fair
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24 Awakening call (8).
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when the train is late
amcant of reading. I travel, I observe, I compare." Through Mr Keith, spoke his author, Norman Douglas.
NEW BOOKS
by George Malcolm Thomson
blackmailer
*Douglas was one of the most entertaining literary
who hounded him door: "Cone to Gennaro's for characters of his age, always unexpected, un immensely death with charges of un- dinner. Follow." And of Gen famous writer who rejected natural vice, Douglas was care- noro's? "Ah. Your pappa! E la the smug and rosy clouds ful to add, "I should not care gene home ten minutes ago. 'E tuppence if theso insinuations leave this note." The note ran of apotheosis, a vagabond had been true: 1 should think it "Gone home. What's the mat who never forgot that he rather sporting of the old ter with you?" was a Scottish gentleman gentleman to have indulged in ("Your love affairs of any kind at his of ancient lineage.
4me of life." family of Tilquhillie-the oldest in the county, they tell me").
The pedant
Broad survey
where
Four hours after leaving St. of the full This tari apostle and tolerant life could, when he Pancras station, the boy arrived chose, write in the grand at 63 Albert Mansions, marner, ns in his wonderfully his father greeted him: "What evocative description of a on earth happened to you? The train vos ridiculously pte, 1 Roman fountain:
And I'll be bound it suppose.
heated either-damntu wasn't English trains."
60
grew older, he
NORMAN DOUGLAS-ke disliked democraty
He was an artist, who had
That hoary, trickling struc- In his composition more than ture that fountain which has a touch of the pedant, the forgotten to be a fountain,
As Douglas does the water ooze laborious scholar. It was dreamily
to write. His through obstructive mosses and found it harder like him to become an expert emerald growths that dangle in frequent condemnation of other in a neglected field of know- drowsy
like wet people's pendants
writing was: my boy." In the ad parting down ledge like London Street beards, from its venerable lips literary,
untrimmed, mirably broad Burvey fountain Games. He was a little bit that
harmonious. overhung by an writings provided by DM, Low's their beards" of a brigand by tempera- clent ilexes: where shall a more selection, there is not much that, Is "literary"; a great deal that' ment,
reposeful spot be found?"
is smiling but ruthless, with a shrewd vein of cussedness.
He believed that ethics were a branch of physiology; manners, however, were lm-
So difficult
But the characteristle note is
portant. He kept sweets irony, with hints of naughtiness: for children in one packet; the rhythm is that of casy con-
versation, the note that of snuff for old men in another. "frolicsome perversity." He constantly found him- self
Too
of his
| PARADE
25-YEAR At the base of Nel same way that people aboard Column in ocean-going ships get Crossing- DATE
Trafalgar Squar the-Line certificates.
London, four men met and shook The steamers' crews
hacids. Then they pulled out
She shops for
would
theal,
faded Invitations cards dated miss Mrs Smith if she stepped July 17, 1930 and read; "The going. Floral Club requests the pleasure children and gives motherly brings presents of rock for their of your company at the foot of
advice when they have
prob- Nelson's Coluiras at 6 pm. July ems. In winter-time, which 17, 1035."
steamers do not operate, The invitation had beat drawn she wanders to the end of up 25 years before by seven Southend Pier and gazes for young businessmen in Hamli- hours at the wide and ton's, then a lunch tavern STR
the
Column Street. In 1930 the Club Thames Estuary.
brake up. One of the members
went to South Africa and could MILK
not get in the founicati, ofte died
of wounds received in a Japanese QUEENS
black
lonely
18-year-old
and white cowe are breaking prisoner of war camp and one milk production retards for the They Battish Friesian breed. was misring
Of the four who shook hands aro in the British Friesian again Trafalgar Square one Society's Register of Merit as had been tea planting in India, having given yields of over one worked for a chocolate firm, 18,000 lbs of high quality mill another was an insurance agent in ten or more laetations, and the fourth was the author
of the top-selling "Gunbusters,"
the story of Dunkirkt.
THREE COINS There
"magic" Ito IN FOUNTAIN
llan foun. tain beside the river at Canter- bury. It is the one-time garden of
This entitles them
Jetters
nimas
to the "R.M." after their and because each. has given over 10 tons of milk in their lifetimes to dato, they may add "R.M." as well.
On farm at
Mr
anglon,
the 13th century Black- Chere
friums Monastery.
J. R. Gardiner's. Comaby. near Brid- Yorkshiro, "Speelon R.M., R.M.L., has
For over 600 years there has had ton merit entries with a
overall average of 15,080 lbs been a public right of way for each laptation. through
2 the garden and
belongs to The other pow
(Eynsford)
month ago 12-year-old Robert William Alexander Brimley threw in three peonics Ltd, the middle
of
amark Next
and has 11 marit wished for monkey.
the register. Both a sailor from Zanzi entries in his bar walked into
the nearby animals are reported to be in baby monkey the best of health. "who cafe-with
needing a good
home. So Robert got his monkey and the
MATILDA'S fountain acquired fame.
Or in an anecdote, like
John cousin
Heywood, carried a supply of gingerbreads in his pocket because you never There are glimpses: of Dou- know when you may be hungry" madder, and who, becoming glas, the young diplomat in St. Petersburg, charmed to find that took to mixing up one person he shared with the Prime with another and handed Dou
glas the five guineas fee intend- Minister, Prince, Lebanoff, taste
for driving down on hot ed for a Hurley Street specia- list. Douglas pocketing the While Anatole France seems summer afternoons ho see the
an urgent con- the Black money pleaded espousing unpopular to think that "if only we could people bathing in,
*sultation and hurried off. "a bewitching naked, causes, not out of any roman- get rid of
we Brook, Christianity, tic zest but simply because, should all be happy as the day and strangely patriarchal sight; insisting on thinking for is long." Dauglas does not think it carried une back to the youth
will of the world." it at all likely the world himself, he often arrived at ever be sensibly butter: "we unconventional conclusions, shall be lucky if it is not a But not only did he think great deal worse." for himself more danger- ous, he said
as
A
Automata
in-
П
The legend, irca- sured by Austro- lians everywhere,
Robert called the monkey ENGLISH "Lucky" but after a while he that "Waltzing Matilda" is an escaped and the police searcher old Australian bush ballad, has unavailingly. Heartbroken, been exploded by Mr Kenneth Robert
visited the fountain
she худа
collector ół
again, threw in his last half. Younger, MP. M. Younger is a folk songs and is,, at penny and wished hard. Within 12 hours Lucky
came home on present, touring Australia.
He has discovered in Sydney's his own.
Mitchell Library what appears to be the original of "Matilda." 25 is called The Bold Fusiller" and Setting out on life's journey CRUISING Since A report
with the mental endowment of FOR RUBY told by a doctor is an old English borrack room the Duke of that a long sea ballad sung by his family ("inconspicuous and
cruise was the only cure for her Marlborough's men who fought About another Russian, Prince all of us rather cracked into the
Mrs claustrophobia,
Ruby the French in 1704. The chorus learned Douglas As a husband, he must have Uchtomsky, who urged imme- bargain"). he been what
difficult:
"Who'll be a soldier; father diate war with Britain, over from a professor at Wurzburg Smith, 50, of Southend, hes goes:
travelled a the emphasis on
distance equal to His son Robin tells India, impossible.
Douglas wrote a report to lay
Who'll be a soldier; She how, aged 10, he arrived from which the Foreign Office sent on dividuality." It was "a formula twice around the world.
but school at London railway to Windsor Castle. It came back for avoiding those flat lands of could not afford a craise,
each she has taken three or four to with a note in Queen Victoria's life where men absorb station where Norman was
A to trips
Thames week in meet him. No father!
violet Ink-pencil: "I don't think other's' habits and opinions He disliked demderacy; doled
D knows much about such an extent that nothing is pleasure, steamers to Clacion or At length, a policeman with Mr
left save a
of flurried Mogate. herd on the work and opinions
Prince U,"
automata."
Now she has completed 800 Oulda (to whom in her distress a message in well-known hand- "Gone to English
Douglas can sum up a per- he lent money).
With her, he, writing:
But it was never likely that trips at a cast of £500. Eagle
of London are 30. MORALE believed that the mainspring of Review Office, Tavistock Street.
observing, sicamers The horrible Commis- Douglas travelling, was nothing loveller Come on there as soon as you snage in a phrase,
arrive." Through a London fog salre at Modane, one of those comparing, would find himsen impressed that they are com
BOOSTER He lived nemorating her 500 trips by the boy groped his way 10 Frenchmen with whom one is member of a herd,
with a "wide presenting her Street-where
to quarrel, and died an impenitent Tavistock
he instinctively driven
open spaces" parchment, in the found a
pinned to the, because they wear a sententious, conformist.
thought..
Tolerance
of
SOHUTION.—a crossi
Socialism 1 Martinet: 1 Crave, et- thees, 10 Leven, 13 Precede, 13 Pace, 17 Umpires, 18 Declare, 20 Idle,
than envy. 21 Erected, 2 Greerly, 27 Fourteen. 2 Enten. Reaves, Dawn: 1 Sento, 2 Vase, 3 Melec, 4 Tots, 5 Nectar, & Tusses, Endure, 11 Erred,
When he defended Krupp, the 12 Sende. 1 Energe. 15 Piece, 18 Ceded, is Difter, 19. Clouis, 2 Ernes,
arms magnate, against Testy, 24 Dying, 25 Str.
VIGNETTES OF LIFE
IF THAT PIPE DOESNY KNOCK 'EM DEAD- NOTHING WILL
ށ
THE YOUNG MOSQUITOES SEEM TO BE EVEN WORSE THAN THEIR ANCESTORS WERE.
note the
The Younger Generation
SOME ANGLERS HAVE AN ATTACHMENT FOR THE
YOUNGER GENERATION OF FISH.
THE PRESENT CROP OF BUMBLE BEES HAVE IT EASY---- THEY DON'T HAVE TO DRILL THROUGH AS MANY THICKNESSES: OF CLOTHING AS THEIR
GRANDPARENTS DID.
COM, 1955 BY GENERAL FEATURES COM. IM/WORLD RIGHTS RESERVED.
THERE ARE NO
YOUNG ANTS-
THEY'RE ALL
WORKERS.
WABLE-BODIED
'THEY'RE A
(IF YOU CAN).
SREAT JOY.
TAKE IT)
KRAZY HOUSE
поп-
BY HARRY WEINERT
MOMMY — WAKT ARE "CALORIES?
"DO YOU CALL THAT.
AN ONION
KITTENS ARE ESPECIALLY
CUTE
WHEN
NOBODY'S INTERESTED,
He
cried
Who'll be a soldier for Mari- borough with me?"
marched as ho through the streets of Rochester, "Who'll be a soldier for Mari- borough with me."
West Germany hol a surprise, for the pundits who have boen gloomily predicting disas- też from the New German army --and waiting breathlessly to
hear who will be recruited frat. near The answer; among the first men will be bandamen.
A skeleton force will be re- cruited between now and diarch
and
it will include six majors
12
and six glatt sergeants, who are
experts on brass bands.
will draw up plans for six corps of bandsmen
"Bands," says the Ministry.
morale."
Delence
"are important for
But one march is almost cer- tain to be ruled out, for good- "Badenweiler." The march was Hitler's favourite, playe whenever he came in sight of a military band.
BLOOMING Tho DESERT
Kreat да
The
heaps that near electric. power stalicats and other Indus- trial works need no longer re- main ugly wasteland. Dr W, J. Reos, botany professor at Birmingham University has shows that nɛh tips can be made to produce firm crops of grass and clover. At one experimental site adjoining a Staffordshire power station, he has this your
two grown
crops, aveT BEING over four tona to the acre, And this was with no soil covering at
all
Especially Joterested im his experiments were the Egyptian authorities.
Dr. Rees reckons that, if grass can be made to grow on dalı, crops will also grow on sterile wastes in other parts of the world, even where, there is no soil or sludge, to epread as tha surface,
SWEET A "sweet and exolie" DUST perfume is being sprinkled on the floor of the. Dlet, Japan's national parliament; tó seduce
membora.
8. Into a happles moro harmonious
mind.
This
tho.
experiment
in theocked tramears.
of Osaka and Tokyo this, summer. These trains too have: been perfumed,
Said one traveller: It is a grert boon. Now if one trampled underfoot in the rush hour at least the ground smells nicol":
FIREICA fro... engine « roaredu FIRE out from: Huddersfield,
fire one-night,
to fight
Blast:wosic.
| soft, pest
to more
"