PRIVATE EYES REACH FOR CUPS OF CHAR

By

YORKE HENDERSON

an

advertising

Tiena brillig and the allly used t 49

medium for hi agency,

_

sieuth

Did gure

and vimblr ira the Waldorf.

But where toppe Holmes and Spade and Mar- lotor.

Hercule

Peter

R

Wimse

Poiro17

IGHT from the start I

had this guy tabbed for a private eye. He had that mean look. I bet myself the bulge under his jacket was a 46 Colt... 26 .38 Smith and Wesson lenst.

at

out.

hend

man,

An attractive blunde delegate, Mrs Zena Archer, turned out to be head of « Liverpool agency, inherited from her father, ex-Scotland Yard detective.

But, she confessed, her agency concentrated mainly on divorce work. She

Κανε 116 her pro- fessional card. I I wonder why.

Eventually I tracked down Association the President Jack

Ballard, ex-CID President man from Birtulngkain, with

him the first vestige drama. Maybe he looked more like a muccessful business man than a private eye, but he had, he said, worked on every sort of care "from murder down." But even he had to ads

admit that most of his work

was fairly routine stuff,

and

have

infringement with

patent cases and the like.

I lost. He turned to be another newspaper- man. Invited along to tea and strawberries the Association of British Detectives at their annual general meeting.

*T•t} and strawberries, forsooth. Four fingers of Even shot rye, maybe. of cocaine from the Wizard of Baker Street.

W

The rest of the set-up Just as union-shattering.

Every render of Mesars Cheyney and Chandler knows

private sleuths don't have professional asserinllons. Even if they did, they wouldn't hold meetings In respectable London hotels.

that

Drew Blank

of

does a guy have to slug a

I ask you, what sort of chance

calcitrant suspect 011 fringement of patents case" Annual "Oscar”

To- In-

But what hurt most was the Association'a questing after un- sulled reaprelnbility and ometņl ecognition. Qualification stand- urds for membership, profess ional discipline,

Rood public relations-these were the sort of thing they had been talking about in private session.

They even referred to their Governing Council for syan- pathetic consideration i sug-

estion that there should be a sort of annual "Oscar" for the best bit of private sleuthing in each year.

As for

delegate-dicks who queued quietly for their

And they voted in favour of cups of tea, 1 tay there wasn't

an Arbitration Board to settle one set of brnss knuckles disputes between members. Sum among the int And it any of Spade er Philip Marlowe could them

luscious blonde have told them these disputes secretaries they must have

traditionally settled by parked them in the fall.

faceful of knuckles or a bellyful Nobody looked

ir he'd of lead

of lead. recently by

Nonn

hart

been beaten up

are

1s

of the delectives I spoke

hoodtums red! by a crooked to sected ever lo have been

millionaire

hired by the sort of exotically-

The only man who spoke to perfumed client who lashes out

of

1s

L

ôf the corner me out 201

coping wit WHS spoonful of nixed fruit saladi. I drew a blank on the on delegate thought might maa – sure up to Spillane specifications, He was a snooth Clark Cable type.

But he hafted from Barcelona despite its name the Association 14 International – and he spoke no English.

With 11 wealth

of Latin gestures, however, he managed to communicate that he publish- detective magazine and

£1.000 retainers with promises

of unimaginable rewards when the missing heirloom is found.

One delegate put the average private eye's annu after-tax income at around £500. Hardly the income bracket for Mayfair Bats and high-powered

with

CU

sports

But I left

faint one Klean of hope. Presiden! Ballard admitted to reading everything Peter Cheyney wrote. And Mrs Archer, I discovered, is a fan of Philip Marlowe.

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THE BRITISH GENERAL ELKÜTRID

LED.

BLANT

C

of the

THE CHINA MAIL, MONDAY, JUNE 28, 1954.

FRANCE

NE

Pardon, Messieurs!

- until my right foot Comes to an agreement with my Left foot... Alas!

Gimmings

"MON DIEU, MORE FAINTING ON PARADE

China, Russia

Over Jenghiz

- יז'ן

་་

By WALTER KOLARZ

MY LADY H. STICKS HER NECK OUT

OMETIMES

By BERNARD WICKSTEED, the Fun- Finding-Out man, who renews his adventures with Chapman Pincher

at the beaks at us with cold and glassy his beak at the nest without a edge of a river or lake stares.

twig to appenso his mate. you Beo a tall, grey Heron watchers and bird

They both take their turn at bird with a long neck and gossip writers have comparted egg sitting. When father comes lege, and if you know what that there are 4,000 familles in home for his turn ho zalses a Britain this year. If you add to crest of feather on his head, like it is the chances are you will these Lord and Lady Herons all a coronet, and says what sounds say: "Look! There's heron !"

A the little Honourable Herons like: "Arry, 'Arry." but prob- who have not come of ago you ably mans: "What sort of a get a total of about 25,000. This day have you had, my dear?” the gives them further reason for Beyond that, and

thinking they come out of the fact that herong

top drawer, for there are at frogs and fish, you may least 10,000,000. British black know little more about these birds

and just 11.3 hony birds than I do. Or should chaffinches.

When he is away from homo he uses another codo name. You can hear him calling "Frank!"

Hla

Family Crest

I say than I did, becausо Like royally, herons come of last week I went with Mr ago young. They nest when

wife slowly stretches The winter herself, and before accepting the Chapman Pincher to meet a they are a year old.

of 1947 struck the herons a blow gift of the sticks she points her family of herons at Parham,

aa hard as the inheritance tax, beak in the air os if to show In Sussex.

but, because they marry young. their numbers are now The house at Parham is back to normal.

99 that even if she does have to

sit on her own eggs she in still

a ledy. Occasionally they le

one of the show places of Pincher and I were taken to their feathers down and clap Britain, full of old pictures the heronry at Partram by the their bills like castanets,

and

As the young grow up they nest and the

Nu get BQ used to seeing father's said. This

Pen familly crest when he соле

oak, and the herons head gamekeeper. "They ore that nest in the park come the first birds in from a long line of lunded last to leave," he birdry too. They have raised ear there are 30 nesls in the home that they go for him if he beronry, and when we called

their young in the same the young had all been hatched forgets to raise it. Herons are good reason. their slow filters, for a In spoons wood since Tudor times (with silver and longer, perhaps, than beaks) and were hanging around if they did not have a low land- the timbered ancestral homes in ing speed they would break their legs on touch-down. But they the plne tree discussing - have been seen to loop the perhaps the unkind reviews of loop, and in the hawking days why "The Frog"

the falcon did not always win, Birds

Sometimes the heron spearod it in mid-air,

that.

You can widerstand these aristocrats from

Peerage were bil stand-offish

In their Asco! suits when

couple of Common journalists called.

Eight Nests

Their parents were out in the County, not huntin' or shootin', From the tops of the pine but certainly shin'. trees where they have their nests they looked down their

Differ Khan

The birds love ecis, but realis- ing, perhaps, that cels are not as genteel a dish as frogs' legs, they take pains to remove the dinner stains afterwards, They do this A few of the trees had seven with their beaks by fraying cer- or eight nesta in them. Some tain feathers into à fine powder wero large and rozbling like and spreading it over their body. manor houses and others as neat as villos.

Pincher says there is evidence that the blads come back to the same nest each year. They add Lan another storey or wing till at last it gets so big that it falls down. Jackdaws and other plebeian birds sometimes over the bascenent.

cut

debutantes Just matrons

It would

nover do to como back to the stately home in tho pines reeking of raw cels.

DA

Insular Birds

caru

British herons are insular lake birds. They never go to tho Continent. They were probably put off by the French Revolu- The small nests may belong to tion, When your neck is as long last year's that has nothing in common starting

a heron's you cannot OMMUNISM in its

in much about a country, that uses with the Christian Cyril-society, or to old birds who can the guillotine. Or don't they lite undiluted form is

no longer cope with the cum the German herren-volk? Methodius tradition. the negation of the

bling ruins of the family home nation and

so furand have set The Communials have

up an establish- The earliest known bird ple- been careful to avoid the pro-ment casier to run.

ture in the world is of a heron. traditions of all ligious

motion of national traditions

It is in a Spanish cave, and is peoples, and as such, can

which could clash with the Lady Heron docs all the 16,000 years old. That is more exercise only limited attrng- For with all due respect to tions of the Wartburg national 1nditions of Russia. building and Lord Heron has to than they can say of the par- tion. Towards the middle the Resistance fighter students than it has with But there is always the danger fetch the material. Sticks (not traits of people which hang on

the walls thirties the Com Casanova, it must be pointed those forces against which of such a clash, particularly in mink or tiaras) are the signs of

Asia, where Russians and heron wealth, and even after the Pacham Park. munist International out that her loyalties, a the first Wartburg mani- Chinese Communists may not eggs are laid he dare not show

festation was directed. No see eye to eye about the national doubt most of the studenta traditions to be promoted. then assembled dreamed of

In one instance disagreement those freedom of speech, has already occurred. It con- press and conscience which cerns the evaluation of Asia's did not exist in Europe in greatest conqueror Jenghiz

Khan.

Jenghiz Khan, head of of the nine- the Great Mongol Empire of the the first half teenth century, and which thirteenth century, is, of course, today are denied to the peo- a national hero of the Mongol ple of the Soviet Union and people. But as he fought the Russians and Bald waste Russian its satellites.

land, his name is anathema In oficial

where Soviet Russia, this Marxist Communism and cere- Russian nationalism were blend-

realised this limitation and those of every active French switched over to "popular Communist, were divided be, front" tactics.

tween the Soviet Union and France, while the name of Joan of Arc is synonymous with France and with France alone.

on

This implied not only ย common front with non- Communist parties and groups but also an ideolo gical reorientation in the sense of greater stress the national factor in his- then Com- tory. Since munist parties the world over have consistently tried to exploit the great figures of the past and claimed to be the true trustees of the best national traditions of r

DISTORTION

those countries where

the Communists have es-

The day

after

even worse

the Inhabitants controlled Outer

not

Russian- of Mongolia, the

of

the house at

-London Express Service)

Newell Rogers' American Report

Rocket Man Keeps On Crashing

New York.

He stopped at the Edwin Doty

Doty's chief worry: Would she have enough "cookies," as biscuits are called

for In Minnesota,

all the courtiers, generals, governors, and mayors in the emperor's party?

She bad,

tablished their dictatorship pseudo- nationalistic and where they

cannot mony at the Wartburg, the od long ago into one singleCIENTIST John P. Stapp farm for 20 minutes to see what a "real American form is really be publicly contradicted Bulgarian Communists per- ideology.

for Jenghiz Khan is has jolted and jarred ike ridiculed by

an their petrated

strictly prohibited

only himself on a rocket sleigh by

Mrs celebrating among the Mongol peoples of on 27 occasions at a New their respective countries. opponents, they have car. travesty

ried the falsification of Cyril and Methodius Day, the Thus the United States history much further than or, as it is officially called. Soviet Union but ates among Mexico research station.

Ho reached 421, miles an Communists evoke Abra- in countries where they are "Day of National Education

play hour, the fastest ground speed ham Lincoln, those of Latin still struggling for power, and Culture and the Slavo "so-called Mongol People's Re-

No public."

poem

ever achieved (the late John evoking the memory of America clair to be heirs of Every week provides strik. nic Alphabet." that great erator Simon ing examples of the way in

cruel but great emperor may be Cobb touched 403 miles an hour The names of Cyril and published in Outer

Mongolia, on a world car record rim). Bolivar,

the French which Communists within Methodius are dear not only and even restoration of the But John Stapp is not after

Jenghiz Khan period has been imitate aircraft crashes.

and

Communists have grown into the Soviet orbit distort his

the habit of commemorating tory to fit party ends. Joan of Arc every year at the beginning of May.

PROTEST

near

Western

AR

and

VENERATION

DIFFERENCE

Chinese-controlled

this

His worst jolt equalled driving into a brick wall at 120 miles an hour.

finc

WINSKY DISTILLER offers

"Tho Midlands and the Northwest of England humming at an over-increasing

aro

to the Bulgarians but to all architectural monuments of the speed records. His job is to A the Metropolitan Opera a Slay peoples. These two

now home ir it likes to stopped. On May 23, 1964, for apostles of the Slavs who

move from Broadway to Park Avenue, There he plans to bulld a skyscraper for his com- instance, the East German lived in the ninth century Communists staged what have gone down in history,

pany's offices, which would also be "at home to some culturo,” they described as

great mis. an "im. not only

HERE, so far, are his con- sionaries but also as the Mongolia, however, there is a can stand greater

Inner clusions: 1. The human body pressive ceremony"

creators of the Slavonic, or

shocks than

La special TROM Manchester Castle THIS year's commemora- Wartburg

tion of Joan of Arc, held Eisenach, Thuringia, which Cyrillic, alphabet. Both the completely rent attitude to have occurred in fatal crasher, correspondent of the Churls-

There, a wards Jongliz Khan,

2. Passengers should face the

tian Science Monitor, one of in front of the Paris Town has been a symbol of Ger.

Eastern ceremony was held with great rear not the front of the plane; the leading US, newspapers, ~ Hall, had a particularly topi man nationalism since the Churches have included them pomp on April 23, 1954, com- 3. The lap safely belt should sends this report;"

memorating the 727th anniver be supplemented by a shoulder cal character. It took the nineteenth century. The among their saints.

Bary of his death.

The event harness; 4. Beats must be more form of a protest against ceremony was held to mark

was publiclaed by the Chinese West German rearmament the virtual completion of the

Communist newa amey, which firmly anchored. and the war in Indo-China. restoration of the castle,

said that the feast was attended by 6,000 hordsmen and peasants

n's" a second industrial. At the same time the French and the Communist peot

Vast Atlanile Ocean cur- volution....As ono norther So deep-rooted is the from all parts of THE GULF STREAM, that tempo in what may be described Communists had the in- and East German Minister veneration of the Slavs for hirman of the Inner Mongolian having its temperature taken,

presided over by the rent that warms Britain, is manufacturer put it: and was genious idea of connecting of Culture, Johannes these two saintly brothers Autonomous Government him-

not take my hat off to Germans the Joan of Arc manifesta. Becher, delivered

a speech that the Communista sell

Scientist William F. Richard- or Japanese, I am taking my tion with the commemore full of nationalistic phrases, thought it expedient to

coat oft Chinos Commumis? son is taking the readings by tion of a woman Communist, He referred to the students' mako use of their great Government not only encourged his radiation thermometer in Daniello Casanova, who died demonstration at the Wart-

the popularity. During this molestation but even took an amphibious aircraft. This AN ELECTRIC EYE timed the measures intra speed of a ball thrown by of typhus in 1943 in a Ger- burg which took place 187 year's Cyril and Methodius credit for the return of the bier thermometer

Khan of Jenghiz man concentration camp.

his red radiation and compares it Bob Turley, baseball's fuitost years ago and said it must celebrations in Bulgaria, the empress to the old mausoleum with radiation from water in pitcher (bowler). be the sacred task of every Minister The invitation issued for German

of Education, drum which they had been re- the plane. It will tell him to preserve his Yanev, went so far as to moved by Kuomintang exactly where the Gulf Stream this strange demonstration

heritage. ran thus: "On Sunday May

refer to their cause as A' This difference in the ap- 9 at 9.30 a.m. commemora- In reality the East Gor. strong shield for Bulgarian praisal of Jenghiz Khan is, por tion of two French heroines man Communist regime has, national culture against the haps, the most remarkable dis-Atlantis, he will use a new beer-or it winer fallen for national indepen- of course, far less in com. capitalist West. denco Joan of Arc and mon with the botter tradi- Cyril and Methodius Day interest, even if the Chinese depths.

which has embeged so far. It flow of the current at various

The

rogime.

the

and

flows.

Later, in the research'

crepancy between Ruslan and strument called

It recorded a. rato, of 94.3 miles an hour.

ship. CAKE, the Japanese drink, is

bathy

Chinese Commeuriset - Ideclogy | pilotameter, which measures the

in Bulgaria was, very Communists are as little sincere

Wino, says the Senate, Beer, says the House of Ro- presentatives,

Danielle Casanova. Meet

If wine it must pay an insport with garlands and bunches

tax of 67 cents a galign it beer ↑ The Wanbury Tradition), Os significantly, the last day of, in playing up Jenghis Khan as of Illac at the Pyramides October 11 and 1. 1217, professor

[OME-MADE lemonade and only. 20 cents. Underground Station.”-

and students from all sin of the Week of the Bulgarian the French Communists in com-0

Fblacuits ( were served -- LO manypist at ith himpilation of the Book" which had the sole memorations Joan of Arc or the

Cherman Communiata with their Emperbest Halle" Belande of 'KTHWEST team' for Commun- Bo the Communists try, to welCEASTA ENC Sartrengthen des purpose of increasing" the trung (GPW) the Wartburg Ethiopia by a Minnesota ferp. - later thủ Ughs (ritymnes with reconcile the irreconcilable, com of the Gemed tree sale of a type of literature Criti

thugs).

“Studente Ciaba&founded iMEPAGE NO

'dom" Gurmien "mation,

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