TILES

"If he raps my head once more with that baton, and says 'Fortissimo,' I'm

going to get up and fortissimo him.”

We

London Express Service

Should Ridicule

The Ridiculous, And Deflate The Pompous

By John

London.

Gordon

bigo

Lloyd

THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, MARCH 21, 1958.

New Light On Most Hated Man in Europe

LAST HOURS OF A MONSTER

T-

By ROBERT HARMAN

HE dough-faced little Gangster-like, he laid up at were making him tremble co man without

the home of his mistress, hi violently that the Colonel Nung any In her room 11 he thought It an Army blanket over him. trousers hitched up was safe to sneak ou aud head And so, fantastic figure, he his underpants and south.

was driven back to Luneburg. hugged his blunket round

4t There,

headquarters, Sergeant-Major Edwin Austin him as he stumbled' out of the car at 2nd Army Head-

was walling for him with a Top- quarters, Luneburg.

sandbag in his hand. ranking Nazi prisoners were his esponsibility and he meant to knock- Himmler unconscious

that a it away, 50

really could complete search for poison

But he was not be made. allowed to carry out his plan,

But the precious identity card, the passport to safety. was the very thing that was to trap him. How the real Hitz inger, murdered by ono of Twitching like a fright laughed if he could have seen Himmler's courts, would have ened animal, he blinked the Reichstuchrer stopped at with short-sighted eyes at one of the first Britian check the sergeant-major who points he came to, at Bremer

vorde.

grabbed him by the arm and dragged him inside. "You are a policeman, Hein- And that was the last the rich Hitzlager?" asked the ser

reant. "Come inside. We world ever saw of Heinrich HAVE ORDERS TO DETAIN espectable ittle man who Himmler.

GERMANS IN UNI-

ALL

Ten minutes

Inter, Insane FORM." with fear, he was to bite on the - cyanide cupsule hidden in his mouth and die, hanging upside down like a rabbit, while his captors, tried to force the poison out of him.

WEB OF FEAR

THUS ended the stars (which Will Frischauer has DROV pieced together) of the Reichs- fuchrer SS, the Commander- in-Chief of the Reserve Army, the Chief of German Police.

Looking back over his crimes, It is hard to get him down to lile size,

Himmler might still have brazen- ed it out. But he didn't have the guts!

"It's

110

11 sobbed.

use,"

a Heinrich Himmler."

He was sitting loo heup in the corner of the shed when Colonel Murphy, Chief of intelligence

Field Marshal

Montgomery's reared up H.Q In his car less thon rong with the screams of his later.

h hour

They pushed Himmler into a reat little room with red plush vixirs a respectable room, just the sort of room for the

BROJ to go and see his mother every morning before signing The death- warranta for the gas chambers.

HIMMLER

They stripped him and searched

him. found до- thing and began lo search again. Himmler dicken his

pulled

his head away from the Anny doctor

who was trying to open his mouth-end jerk-

ed back in the

ghostly convul- so of prussie- acid pulsoning.

Austin grabbed

ut bis throat, doctor

Here was a man who caused the death of enough people to All hair London. All Europe

victims..

Yet Hinmlter, the spider in ordered. "See if he has got any jerked his feet up into the air. the middle of this web of fear, was ..nothing but a school poiron on him. Don't give him They thumped his back, pressed his stomach. But it was foo sneak who grew up into a bitle is clothes back!"

Inte. mouse of a man, too terrified to take part in killugs himselt end writhing with pains in his stomach every time he ordered another ten thousand or so to the death chambers.

Himmler, in fact, probably knew almost as much fear as his victims. For, above all things, he was a coward.

"ustrip him," the Colonel the Colonel and the

ing to see whether he had buen and let the little ordinary people. REICH'S END REN'T we becoming naughty or not.

se how they can use it." Twenty years

First he suggests a a lot of sourpusses Gearge, who knew how to deal allery into which anyone can

publice will never discover me," he whispered when these days? It uses with pomposity, deall very effect- Ro and watch the wheels going Hitler was dead, when the Third to be one of our grand quali. Ively with Lord Harlech on an round. Birt the old striped Reich was crashing to its end.

This, Months ties that we could laugh at occasion when he suffered from trousers shriek in horror.

before, In Gestapo a sudlen rush of blood to the they cry, is an intrusion into our Headquarters in Berlin, he had our troubles, and even

st head.

privacy. It will destroy pro- pleked up the identification ourselves.

fessional dignity. Did you ever

card of a German policeman hear more pompous twaddle?

executed for "defeatism." Now was the Ume to make use of it. "From now on I am Heinrich

We pricked pomposity with ridicule, and made laughing stocks of our busy boxlies.

Stuckbroking is no more a pro-

an

fession thus grocering Stock Hitzinger," he gloated. "I have brokers ure simply salesmen, like Uie men who sell us motor cars, carpet sweepers, or furni- | stuck ture on the never ever."

If Sir Bernard Docker pricks the bubble again he will have wide support. For it was on impertinent and intolerant action to deliver a public insult to Sir Bernard and his wife, and load the dice, against them. by lend- lng strength to rúmour at a very Every little blown-up difficult moment, with hardly a turkey cock who strutted shred of justification. _with_nure_dignity than we may plead that the Dockers proper comes out into the open Of course the City big-wigs A salesman who wants to thought was good for him were too naughty in the Casino to do his business. When he invited a wallop from a to br associated with the begins to develop snob Ideas jester's bladder.

respectable Midland Bank. about professional diguity, and But if a woman has the pluck to feel that ho can only work Very wholesome it was for to slap the face of a man who in a holy temple hidden from them. And fine fun for us. good luck to her. And if her his bumps examined.

has Insulled her, I say jolly vulgar eyes. It's time he had But what a change has husband defends her for doing come over us. We now take it, applaud him too. the pompous as seriously us they take themselves.

.

man

Politicians have become as THERE seems to be something about striped trousers and sacred as Hindu cows, Our black Jackels that gives a feudal peacocks strut about a divine glow of self-import- in Coronation year, firmly ance and knocks sepse out of convinced that the rest of

his head.

The gay Lord Castlerosse had

us were born to venerate an uncie, Lord Revelstoke, who them. And nobody laughs.

Isn't it time we recovered our old gift of ridiculing the ridiculous and deflating the pompous?

L

im-

For, unless treatment is swift, he is bound for Carey Street.

identity card?” Hurriedly Be shaved of his moustache, a black patch over his eve and - with Macher and Grothmann, wo of his S.S. bullies, slipped quietly away.

S.S. men have woven quite a tile web of romance round the next two wecks In Himmler's life, There WIN precious little romance in the reality.

"Himmler." by Win Frischauer, Ocftrants, 16.

MEN IN BIG HATS

ARE

GRUMBLING

New York. from Korea, forget about

the

ranked among the most portant bankers of his day.

Whether it was because of the weight of the personal millions eternal worry he had accumulated, or the of looking after £0.000,000 which a Czar of Russia had deposited in Baring's anys, the bad men are and his grandson on the handlebars. Bank to lie free of interest until there is nothing to guide

he came to claim It, Lord Revel-

had

young Castlerosisc

OWN in Arizona, where, proposed congressional inquiry

De old cowboy song into the war by riding a bicycle

rumba in the home of Ro-

a Latin dance teacher when Mrs

Dretchen heard a noise.

AMERICA COLUMNE

from NEWELL ROGERS.

OOK where we are landing stoke certainly took his striped you but the evening star, DAN

¡ANCERS were swaying to a ourselves. Nosey Par- trousers seriously.

the cowboys are grumbling kerism has become As When the

about the Coronation, of all bert Dretchen under the eye of virulent an epidenile as emerged from the educational things. influenza, It really ought to seminaries the obvious road to

The grumblers, be a notifiable disease. fortune was, to hitch up with

uncle, and share the prosperity ten-gallon hats, in spurs. and Do you know that

D that

come from Boring's

have nothing hundred groups of welfare good luck in having the use of

the Ing to pay interest on them. So possessors of an illuminated he put on

the striped trousers. diploma in poke-nesery) are But not, alus, for long enough to her riding side- busy throughout Britain subdue his natural ebullience. investigating what makes One morning he strode into greeting "Well haw's the old

today

exports (all, I expect, proud the Czar's millions, without hav-against

Queen: they love

those pictures of

salute.

But they work on dude ranches" the great desert Out cattle, but tourists.

a family happy or unhappy? uncle's bank parlour, with the ranches that nowadays herd, not

In April 600 of them are to bucket shop doing

of a union

the bones of the skeletons they even get a week's pay in lieu. found in our cupboards. I enli

He took off his striped trousers hardly wait for It..

But Ln't. It a rather torrifying and never wore them again ex- picture of what life is going to cept to be married, which didn't be like in the New Jerusalem, bring him luck either,

sprained ankle.

She danced in- to the kitchen, pereamed, and a burglar waltzed out of the back door. They cap- tured him in the street. He had a

ORGY AND BESS," the all- Negro musical, had the most unusual Broadway opening Arizona's 114 dude ranches the scasos. First, it

secondly, all the

stead

of

was

11

have a three days' jumbo:ce it he went, And not being report a fall in bookings. They matinee, and London, to play jolly tunes on member

he didn'tbeileve petrons are booking in- spectators were actors from on The year for the Corona- other shows invited to see the

They are mostly city show free. costerners who want to ride the desert ranges under the watch, ful chaperonage of an experi- enced cowhand,

Most dude ranches, like the Juxurious Rancho da

into which these tente, and so confideally righteous, shepherds

are determined to herd us.

NOR

broker.

los

ICAGO's twin hotels arg called Ambassador East and Ambassador Wes!..

For years

Ambassador East

of Caballeros (capacity 84) mako a has run a successful dining rooni It's time the comedians got another example busy on them, play

striped trousers pomposity dat rate for room, board, sun- with scarlet-coated walters. It is I recommend, also to the see what is happening at the shine and horses

supposed to be an imitation of comedians Stock Exchange. The attention of our

Room in Bath, If you and your wife want to the Pump the pompour director of the ore not having too good a time, be dudes it will cost you about

England. Midland Bank, headed by their There nren't enough big in- US$200 a week-not counting

Now

Ambassador West is chaliman Lord Harlech;

vestors any longer. Taxation cigarettes, whisky and square going to open a Beau .Ninh Glowing with self-righteous has lightened their pockets,

- (1874-1701) room dan men's ness, they were so eager to dis- So the chairman proposes that

luncheon club. And the Mayor sociate themselves from Si: the Stock Exchange should dis- MENERAL JAMES VAN of Bath, Alderman A. W. S. Bernard Docker that they pushed card the mumbo-jumbo mystery, * FLEET,"" { retired -Eighth Borry, la coming over for the him dif-the-board-without-waits in which it has – wrapped Itself, |Army... commander...Just - back occasion; :

dancing.

Himmler Jet himself 132 enough. But searched quietly

For two days the body lay at when the soldiers tried to dress Luneburg, and then it was tied alm again, in British battle-

blankets and telephone dress, he screamed and fought up in hysterically. You Want to wire.

The man who took IL catch me in British uniform," away and buried it wus he babbled. "Then you will Sergeant-Major Austin. "I was

shoot me as a spyje

Ruther than put On tho

dustman in civiliun life," he battledress he would take only suid afterwards. "Curious that Akhaki shirt underpants Sucks I could full to me. and boots. Terror and cold this human rubbish.”

Now adding the final touch of gace 20 all Rohan Owaters in this new. allmmer hand-finished cain,

Rules again That with the new Phantom Crown-waterproof, aven when pulled out for hand - petting ".||

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"He saw something glitter in the earth, be stooped and picked it up"

FREE BLUEPRINT OF SUPREMACY' The fasciallog 122064 of some of the secreta that make Rolex one of the Engai watches in the world. For your tw

write the

Rolex Watch Co., Lai, Geney “opy, and

To protect the intricate "movemani, Rolex. ersinmen'and technicians labourad for years 18 prodoor the Oyster ease Employing the nairar method of water proofing-the saliewaling or E tion på þar metal on another-the Roles Oister wanthasrat, and is still she foremost, waterpront,' watch in the world, Visible proofol sccuracy. is the Rolex Red Seal; showing' than the Swne Gavezamanı bas seated the-chronämeter and awarded if a coveted Officii Timing Certificata:

MONG KONG.

Four years buried*

EVEN in 1945, when the war in Europe had ended,, flying had its hazards, Flight-Lieutenant Bolton learnt this only too well; it was -May-13th-when-he had-to crash-land in the South of England, and was badly injured. His aircraft, Typhoon, was completely wrecked, and—a more personal tragedy his Rolex Oyster dis- appeared,

a

It was almost exactly four years to the day when man who lived near where the Typhoon had crushed was digging in his garden. He saw something glitter in the earth; when he stooped and picked it up- yes, it was the pilot's watch,

The case bad corroded sad the hands had rusted; but these were incidentals. After four years in the earth the delicate mechanism was still unharmed; the Oyster case had protected it perfectly.

When you remember that this watch, to alay accumte, has to tick exactly. 432,000 times a day; and that the lubricating oli ku carefully measured to :0001 of a grammes you can realize the exquisite delicacy of a Rolex mavement.

1.

But, you may argue, most watches would never have to undergo a test like that. Truel But all watches have enemies -dirt and damp, dust and perspination- and the sort of watch that will stand that fall sad those four years cast hardly be harmed by slighter hazards. A perfect movement, perfectly protected is what you wint—and what you find in a Rolex Oyster. You find it, too, in the Tudor, the junior member of the Rolex family, which is also protected by the Oyster case.

This is a tre kory, taken from a letter written by the pilot in question (an-Flight Lieutenant W. Bolton, of Urmston, Lase cashire) to the Rolex Watch Company. The original letter, can be inspectad - at the, Ofice of the Roles' Watch Company's1 28, sue du Marche, Ganeya, Ewitzerland.

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