FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS
e
CHRISTENING
CAKES
BIRTHDAY
WORST EPIDEMIC FOR TEN YEARS, THEY SAY.......OH, WELL.
THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 21, 1953.
To Irkutsk and back with Comrade Anna
SIBERIA
TIA
SEVEROLOVSE
KAZAKH
BALK
LAN
HINA 400 MILES
The tale of Comrade Anna's too-free enterprises-as told to Soviel citizens by Pravda-begins with a magic knock at Krasnodari end thousands of miles and 20,000 roubles later in Latvia
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Stockholm. She disappeared again and was N attractive, innocent- next heard of several thousand A looking
miles away in Zaporozhe, where Russian girl after knocking at some more with six aliases, a golden doors, she landed the job of voice, a plausible manner, trade union secretary, and a "magic touch" which
From there she opened the private offices of Dniepropetrovsk with 5,000 of Soviet high officials to her the trade union's roubles. But has .become the
it was only in the Baltle republic' most of Latvia
that she was even- notorious adventurer in the ually arrested. Soviet Union.
Pravda says "not only must
Pravda, the official Com munist party mouthpiece, which usually derides the "capitalist newspaper prae- tice of publicising criminala," today splashes the full story of confidence trickster Anna Rogovaya,
It seems that on a hot day last August, following her mysterious disap- pearance from guol, Anna knocked on the door of the
deputy director at the Ministry of Justice, in the Krasnodar region,
'At peace?'
“There was magic in her knock or else the director
moved to
T
Spotless Wonder
THE STORY OF A GIRL
WHO WON'T GET MEASLES.......
London. HERE is a curibus crisis in our house. We have a daughter who won't get
measles.
Maybe
that sounds fine to you, but for us it is no joke. It has plunged the place into misery, and the most miserable of us all is spotless unnatural
this child.
You see, her brother has got measles (and how!). He has had more spots to the aquare inch than a map of the South Pacific, and she is mad with jealousy.
We fear....
us.
by the father who fools ho has failed BERNARD WICKSTEED
HOW TO GET MEASLES
real bottle and pills squeezed-up dough.
of
It makes us look such as hopeless. Her case was
We take her temperatura fools. She is beginning to beyond his aid.
dally and keep her in a darkened lose faith in
room with a kettle steaming into Poor child, we tried to it all day; but none of the laws of By all
these keep the awful truth from subterfuges can disguiso the medicine she
her. We continued to hold basic fact that she hasn't a single should have been spotted to her heart's content at least a week ago.
I have even thought of creep-
night with a pot of red ink and
out # hope that We spot. knew in our hearta was false. But she sensed that ing up to her bed at dead of something was wrong.
Sho sensed it in the measles while she slept. But the painting her. with artificial grave look of the doctor trouble with that plan is it might and in the nervous tension wake her up, and the only time of her parents.
we get any peace is when she I begin to fear for the and the real patient are asleep, psychological consequences of this great disappoint- I get nightmares which
Yo I see my
She pines
YOUNG John In the meantime has had his spots and lost
The
doctor has daughter lies in bed and pines for the spots that never come.
It is eight days now since the doctor looked her over and gave her 48 hours at the most.
Encouraged by this ment. promising diagnosis we put in her to bed in the same precious daughter in the them again
her LL she wants in this room as
mensly dock at the Old Bailey given up calling, and our world is to have measles brother and said: "There, accused of some this girl go on trial but all the too. She is dying to get there, 'now. Lie officials whom she succeeded in them, and if she continues quietly and you'll soon
down crime, and I hear the duping, cajoling or fascinating
be medical witnesses, one by ill."
one, blaming it all on her cruel parents who wouldn't let her have measles as child.
ALL
must account for their lack of to be thwarted we fear for
revolutionary vigliance."
her reason,
ALL A LITTLE CONFUSING!
By
John Gordon
London. An optician can now make them TOW peculiar are the for you in a fortnight.
situations a Coronation
HOW
ruises!
But there is still a litle gum on the works. For apparently it takes the optician seven weeks For example, on Corona- to get permission to go ahend was feeling too much attion Day, peace with the world on divorced will be welcomed top of him can't cope with the the ad- June 2, the with the job because
ministrative lads and lasses on that hot day," says Pravda into the sacred precincts of flood of forms.
Westminster Abbey. How-
| sardonically,
"But the fact is that Anna somehow inspired him with such sudden confidence that when she asked for a job he suggested that the should start the next morning."
Three days after her appoint- ment she did not turn up and the director was so upset by her supposed sudden ness that he sent her n doctor.
He never tound her.
The millia was alerted when documents were missing. They were equally unsuccessful.
For wherever they may have been searching. Pravda says,
1 was certainly not in Control
Asia, in the private office of the president of the Krasnoyarsk Red Cross.
He, too, apparently had been fascinated by a magic knock on his door.
Economist
was
Bogus pills
awful
When she grows a little older and goes to school her class- mates, with that juvenile genius they have for exploiting the Babnormal, will point the finger of scorn at her and cry: "Hee, hee, hee! She can't get measles! Bully old Kari!"
The 48 hours went by without a measle in sight. Every morning we search- ed her from head to foot like diligent monkeys at the Zoo. Not a sign. The doctor, who calling every day to look at her brother, shrugged his shoulders and gave her up give her bogus medicine out of
Mr Chapman Pincher SAYS epidemic of
measles in Britain for ten years, so if she cannot get it now I
is true we try to mitigate this is the worst WAS
her hardahlps by treating the girl just as we do her fortunate brother
How to
beat that M Morning
moro
John. We see no hope that she ever will.
London Express Service)
a y Feeling
ILLUSTRATIONS BY GERALD HOFFNUNG.
every
So if you are a director of
a big company you either work very little or work every day and either way there la no Mon- day slump.
Optimist
GET
that Monday PHOEBE YOUNG morning feeling (as I ever much the archbishops at times whether work is worth cold
No doubt miny wonder open my eyes to the goes on a hunt may sniff and anort, they the effort you have is put into dawn). YOU get that Mon-
light of Monday's with the calendar cannot, keep them out.
11. Or, in these days of very day morning feeling (if not burdensome taxation, adequately tecompensed.
at dawn then as you strap-
Climbing a few steps down "Yes--but hang towards five whole
morning, the ladder of success I went And days of work). Everyone the old days, when I use to day blues.
seven days a week.
in to people I know get the Mon- gets it....it seems.
rise at dawn to read the first news bulletin, the beastliness But there is a cure for all became unbearable. complaints.....or should
bc. "But, working So
have been trying to WEDNESDAY, And the curo for the Mon- day malady.
went
But 14 days later on June 16, these same divorcees will be excluded from the smooth lawns of Ascot's Royal-Enclosure,
Can you conceive any- thing more absurd? Wo throw open the doors of a church to those whom the archbishops regard as moral lepers. But we close the gates of a racecourse against them.
THEY MAY don a per's robe and watch the sacred anoint- Ing of their Queen. But they never wear top hat and
may
tails at Ascot to racehorse.
cheer her
WISER MEN than us seem to
Mr
have seen the light. James, of Mitcham, for example, When he follows his occupation of bullders Labourer, he draws a wage of 20 a week.
To
a
that the taxpayers, adi another £2 DS
family allowance for his six children, bringing his totul to £ a week.
But if 33-year-old Mr James hankers after
itle leisure. either because the weather is good enough to make a holiday agreeable, or bad enough to make work disagreeable, a good fairy waves her wand over him and, hey presto, his Income
rises to £8 6s. fid.
Od,
"MONDAY
angh
to
the successful, tho f a mous, the mighty. Thoy, thought, would be able to give advice.
I asked Sybil Thorndike (aged 70). Does she suffer from the Monday morning feeling?
Singing birds
The next day Anna
For, instead of his employer officially combining the duties of The Church of England holds paying him £0, we, the tax- senior economist, typist,
marriage is
£0 09. pay him and that
sucrament payers, cashier.
-not merely a contract; that through the National Assistance U man may have
one Board, plus the family allowances says. "I am but living wife-his first,
of £2 as usual.
"How successful she had been
as an economist is still a matter But where are the Coronation
Unless, of course, they have married other pees. In which case, contrary to all the Church's rules, the last becomes the Arst. The noble Duke of Norfolk, a Roman Catholle, must find this divergence between the faith and form of the Church of England u Jittle confusing.
SD
Half-way.
Sold the fling clerk with a baby at home: Just Icel
{FRIDAY trightfun and
as wo do, Feven days a week, Monday hope that by itself. presents lunchtime... Fit..
porilcular bo
After all, problem.
no
better
SO - if yoù the time Tues- have
the job
day comes tho
of announcing week is nearly
or OVOT."
disaster
tragedy at any
timd
of night
daya programme need be beastlier than most,
Sald the Frenchwoman,
or day, Mon- selling model gowns: "It 'is ter-
rible. по
Before the war I bought myself Д tiew hat on Mondays to change my Afae- personality." [For postwar read lipstick or nail varnish
istead of hat).
1 asked Sir Compton kenale (aged 70) whether he suffers on Monday mornings. "Not since I was at school," he Suys. "Now Monday means nothing. A writer writes when he wants she
to and
ho when must."
the
"Oh, goodness me, no," usually in country on Monday morning, and woke up to the sound of birds singing. Then I drive to
of doubt," says Pravda Jeeringly, seats for the first and true wives dificult to decide whether we town for lunch..
1 CONFESS, and it a little "but when she disappeared of divorced peers? Alas, there three days later it WOR dis- no place in
have too little sense, or Mr the Abbey for Jaimes too much. But at least covered that the office typewriter them.
"I love Mondays, In fact, I und cash box with 15,000
to I begin 000 roubles
understand why love Tuesdays too-because I (about £1,300) had also gone,"
the nation needs
many see my grandchildren. I love In Irkutsk, a 11e later, chief
psychiatrists nowadays,
Wednesdays, Judge Bayev was so impressed
because it la by her first hand knowledge of
matinco May. criminal procedure that the
And I love became the clerk of the court
these lesser ASPECIALLY when you add to Sundays be a fortnight of knocking within
nonsenses Mr cause I on his door.
Eden's hair-raising new idea to look forward help the Germans who have tried to Monday
again,"
SO — if you are
Dame and have been appearing in a West End play
her
Q new Ave-yearETS
PICK a
few other sunbeams from the sky.
so hard and so often to smash us up.
can
Etna.
Her position allowed her to make many contacts among the local high-ups. The local chief of police fell under her spell and gave
We are, it seems, to bring the passport.
young soldiers and airmen of Anna persuaded him that the Under the blessing of the new Germany over to wrong name had been entered nationalised medicine, I read, Britain, show them the military for nearly two years you feel no In her old passport.
it now takes eight months to mistakes their fathers madó, despair an Monday's curtain With the notepaper and official have a brace filted to a child's which lost Germany the war, and rirës, forms stolen from Krasnodar, teeth.
teach them how to do better sho forged documents and got On the other hand, the next time.
"dangerous
prisoners" business
spectacles
many released.
JOHNNY HAZARD
YOU SEEM TO HAVE SURVIVED YOUR SHIPWRECK, LORD BREWIS GO ON WITH YOUR STORY!
QUITE! I WAS
PRETTY WELL STIFFENED BY THE CRACKUP OF MY BOAT...
of
providing State Is briskening up. Aren't we wonderful?
"...WHEN'I AWOKE I FELT.WARM/ I OPENED MY EYED..." BER
I asked John Snarge 48) whether ho gois Feeling.
(aged
By Frank Robbins
50--if you are a self-employ ed writer, and a knight in the bargain, you do not even notice Monday's new leaf-turhing.
I asked several big business men. Or, rather, I tried to, but perhaps they were in their yachts or deep in the country protected by their butlers; no doubt taking Monday in much the same spirit as Sunday.
I did frack.
-pay.
opa down, however — tổ
A committco
Het tend new
meeting, lan
Sald the civil servant' with the brier case:
"I just walt patiently till it is over. After all, Tuesday is bound to come."
Safd the commissionare, with the wared moustache: "I think of Monday as the peak of the week. I look forward to it-
Ab 1. merk.
Rugby. I asked themselves.
once
pression paaced
13
de- has tho
week 18 ROT mal.
Bald the win- dow cleaner: "T go to the pictures on Monday... night to cheer my- Edit up."
fow
Yot
¿ people" cheer
up that was m
Mr Halford cinemas' and theatres are emp
Reddish (aged test, on Monday.
'54), a director
of the Post-
That a week and rise at rix 'on each
one. I like work."
So there we are, Advice from lond Coment all kinds, of all sorts, t Company, 1
My advice?...Treat yourself he got the Monday feeling? to the little extras on
"Oh no, I work seven days day. Go to your best lunch Mon- place, Walk the pleasantest way home. Have something extra good for supper.,
MAAND LOOKED INTO THE MOST AGELESS... THE UGLIEST FACE I HAVE EVER SEEN!'
Fiat cars
Model 1400
ONE-PIECE STRUCTURAL" CONSTRUCTION "FOR" "RIGIDITY:
Above all: Don't give in to that Monday Morning Feeling. Have you got.....:
it this
· FLOIT) = -| ing? Then fight it but fight it the cheerful way
Sing a song - even if your family thinks you have gone mud.
Plan your
summerhoil-.
days oven if
it is snowing and the wind cuts through your only topcoat;
m
· Decide to go to a h
and get fun, out of tuntiaputing.
thuhn. vouch