FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS

e

CHRISTENING

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BIRTHDAY

WORST EPIDEMIC FOR TEN YEARS, THEY SAY.......OH, WELL.

THE CHINA MAIL, SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 21, 1953.

To Irkutsk and back with Comrade Anna

SIBERIA

TIA

SEVEROLOVSE

KAZAKH

BALK

LAN

HINA 400 MILES

The tale of Comrade Anna's too-free enterprises-as told to Soviel citizens by Pravda-begins with a magic knock at Krasnodari end thousands of miles and 20,000 roubles later in Latvia

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Stockholm. She disappeared again and was N attractive, innocent- next heard of several thousand A looking

miles away in Zaporozhe, where Russian girl after knocking at some more with six aliases, a golden doors, she landed the job of voice, a plausible manner, trade union secretary, and a "magic touch" which

From there she opened the private offices of Dniepropetrovsk with 5,000 of Soviet high officials to her the trade union's roubles. But has .become the

it was only in the Baltle republic' most of Latvia

that she was even- notorious adventurer in the ually arrested. Soviet Union.

Pravda says "not only must

Pravda, the official Com munist party mouthpiece, which usually derides the "capitalist newspaper prae- tice of publicising criminala," today splashes the full story of confidence trickster Anna Rogovaya,

It seems that on a hot day last August, following her mysterious disap- pearance from guol, Anna knocked on the door of the

deputy director at the Ministry of Justice, in the Krasnodar region,

'At peace?'

“There was magic in her knock or else the director

moved to

T

Spotless Wonder

THE STORY OF A GIRL

WHO WON'T GET MEASLES.......

London. HERE is a curibus crisis in our house. We have a daughter who won't get

measles.

Maybe

that sounds fine to you, but for us it is no joke. It has plunged the place into misery, and the most miserable of us all is spotless unnatural

this child.

You see, her brother has got measles (and how!). He has had more spots to the aquare inch than a map of the South Pacific, and she is mad with jealousy.

We fear....

us.

by the father who fools ho has failed BERNARD WICKSTEED

HOW TO GET MEASLES

real bottle and pills squeezed-up dough.

of

It makes us look such as hopeless. Her case was

We take her temperatura fools. She is beginning to beyond his aid.

dally and keep her in a darkened lose faith in

room with a kettle steaming into Poor child, we tried to it all day; but none of the laws of By all

these keep the awful truth from subterfuges can disguiso the medicine she

her. We continued to hold basic fact that she hasn't a single should have been spotted to her heart's content at least a week ago.

I have even thought of creep-

night with a pot of red ink and

out # hope that We spot. knew in our hearta was false. But she sensed that ing up to her bed at dead of something was wrong.

Sho sensed it in the measles while she slept. But the painting her. with artificial grave look of the doctor trouble with that plan is it might and in the nervous tension wake her up, and the only time of her parents.

we get any peace is when she I begin to fear for the and the real patient are asleep, psychological consequences of this great disappoint- I get nightmares which

Yo I see my

She pines

YOUNG John In the meantime has had his spots and lost

The

doctor has daughter lies in bed and pines for the spots that never come.

It is eight days now since the doctor looked her over and gave her 48 hours at the most.

Encouraged by this ment. promising diagnosis we put in her to bed in the same precious daughter in the them again

her LL she wants in this room as

mensly dock at the Old Bailey given up calling, and our world is to have measles brother and said: "There, accused of some this girl go on trial but all the too. She is dying to get there, 'now. Lie officials whom she succeeded in them, and if she continues quietly and you'll soon

down crime, and I hear the duping, cajoling or fascinating

be medical witnesses, one by ill."

one, blaming it all on her cruel parents who wouldn't let her have measles as child.

ALL

must account for their lack of to be thwarted we fear for

revolutionary vigliance."

her reason,

ALL A LITTLE CONFUSING!

By

John Gordon

London. An optician can now make them TOW peculiar are the for you in a fortnight.

situations a Coronation

HOW

ruises!

But there is still a litle gum on the works. For apparently it takes the optician seven weeks For example, on Corona- to get permission to go ahend was feeling too much attion Day, peace with the world on divorced will be welcomed top of him can't cope with the the ad- June 2, the with the job because

ministrative lads and lasses on that hot day," says Pravda into the sacred precincts of flood of forms.

Westminster Abbey. How-

| sardonically,

"But the fact is that Anna somehow inspired him with such sudden confidence that when she asked for a job he suggested that the should start the next morning."

Three days after her appoint- ment she did not turn up and the director was so upset by her supposed sudden ness that he sent her n doctor.

He never tound her.

The millia was alerted when documents were missing. They were equally unsuccessful.

For wherever they may have been searching. Pravda says,

1 was certainly not in Control

Asia, in the private office of the president of the Krasnoyarsk Red Cross.

He, too, apparently had been fascinated by a magic knock on his door.

Economist

was

Bogus pills

awful

When she grows a little older and goes to school her class- mates, with that juvenile genius they have for exploiting the Babnormal, will point the finger of scorn at her and cry: "Hee, hee, hee! She can't get measles! Bully old Kari!"

The 48 hours went by without a measle in sight. Every morning we search- ed her from head to foot like diligent monkeys at the Zoo. Not a sign. The doctor, who calling every day to look at her brother, shrugged his shoulders and gave her up give her bogus medicine out of

Mr Chapman Pincher SAYS epidemic of

measles in Britain for ten years, so if she cannot get it now I

is true we try to mitigate this is the worst WAS

her hardahlps by treating the girl just as we do her fortunate brother

How to

beat that M Morning

moro

John. We see no hope that she ever will.

London Express Service)

a y Feeling

ILLUSTRATIONS BY GERALD HOFFNUNG.

every

So if you are a director of

a big company you either work very little or work every day and either way there la no Mon- day slump.

Optimist

GET

that Monday PHOEBE YOUNG morning feeling (as I ever much the archbishops at times whether work is worth cold

No doubt miny wonder open my eyes to the goes on a hunt may sniff and anort, they the effort you have is put into dawn). YOU get that Mon-

light of Monday's with the calendar cannot, keep them out.

11. Or, in these days of very day morning feeling (if not burdensome taxation, adequately tecompensed.

at dawn then as you strap-

Climbing a few steps down "Yes--but hang towards five whole

morning, the ladder of success I went And days of work). Everyone the old days, when I use to day blues.

seven days a week.

in to people I know get the Mon- gets it....it seems.

rise at dawn to read the first news bulletin, the beastliness But there is a cure for all became unbearable. complaints.....or should

bc. "But, working So

have been trying to WEDNESDAY, And the curo for the Mon- day malady.

went

But 14 days later on June 16, these same divorcees will be excluded from the smooth lawns of Ascot's Royal-Enclosure,

Can you conceive any- thing more absurd? Wo throw open the doors of a church to those whom the archbishops regard as moral lepers. But we close the gates of a racecourse against them.

THEY MAY don a per's robe and watch the sacred anoint- Ing of their Queen. But they never wear top hat and

may

tails at Ascot to racehorse.

cheer her

WISER MEN than us seem to

Mr

have seen the light. James, of Mitcham, for example, When he follows his occupation of bullders Labourer, he draws a wage of 20 a week.

To

a

that the taxpayers, adi another £2 DS

family allowance for his six children, bringing his totul to £ a week.

But if 33-year-old Mr James hankers after

itle leisure. either because the weather is good enough to make a holiday agreeable, or bad enough to make work disagreeable, a good fairy waves her wand over him and, hey presto, his Income

rises to £8 6s. fid.

Od,

"MONDAY

angh

to

the successful, tho f a mous, the mighty. Thoy, thought, would be able to give advice.

I asked Sybil Thorndike (aged 70). Does she suffer from the Monday morning feeling?

Singing birds

The next day Anna

For, instead of his employer officially combining the duties of The Church of England holds paying him £0, we, the tax- senior economist, typist,

marriage is

£0 09. pay him and that

sucrament payers, cashier.

-not merely a contract; that through the National Assistance U man may have

one Board, plus the family allowances says. "I am but living wife-his first,

of £2 as usual.

"How successful she had been

as an economist is still a matter But where are the Coronation

Unless, of course, they have married other pees. In which case, contrary to all the Church's rules, the last becomes the Arst. The noble Duke of Norfolk, a Roman Catholle, must find this divergence between the faith and form of the Church of England u Jittle confusing.

SD

Half-way.

Sold the fling clerk with a baby at home: Just Icel

{FRIDAY trightfun and

as wo do, Feven days a week, Monday hope that by itself. presents lunchtime... Fit..

porilcular bo

After all, problem.

no

better

SO - if yoù the time Tues- have

the job

day comes tho

of announcing week is nearly

or OVOT."

disaster

tragedy at any

timd

of night

daya programme need be beastlier than most,

Sald the Frenchwoman,

or day, Mon- selling model gowns: "It 'is ter-

rible. по

Before the war I bought myself Д tiew hat on Mondays to change my Afae- personality." [For postwar read lipstick or nail varnish

istead of hat).

1 asked Sir Compton kenale (aged 70) whether he suffers on Monday mornings. "Not since I was at school," he Suys. "Now Monday means nothing. A writer writes when he wants she

to and

ho when must."

the

"Oh, goodness me, no," usually in country on Monday morning, and woke up to the sound of birds singing. Then I drive to

of doubt," says Pravda Jeeringly, seats for the first and true wives dificult to decide whether we town for lunch..

1 CONFESS, and it a little "but when she disappeared of divorced peers? Alas, there three days later it WOR dis- no place in

have too little sense, or Mr the Abbey for Jaimes too much. But at least covered that the office typewriter them.

"I love Mondays, In fact, I und cash box with 15,000

to I begin 000 roubles

understand why love Tuesdays too-because I (about £1,300) had also gone,"

the nation needs

many see my grandchildren. I love In Irkutsk, a 11e later, chief

psychiatrists nowadays,

Wednesdays, Judge Bayev was so impressed

because it la by her first hand knowledge of

matinco May. criminal procedure that the

And I love became the clerk of the court

these lesser ASPECIALLY when you add to Sundays be a fortnight of knocking within

nonsenses Mr cause I on his door.

Eden's hair-raising new idea to look forward help the Germans who have tried to Monday

again,"

SO — if you are

Dame and have been appearing in a West End play

her

Q new Ave-yearETS

PICK a

few other sunbeams from the sky.

so hard and so often to smash us up.

can

Etna.

Her position allowed her to make many contacts among the local high-ups. The local chief of police fell under her spell and gave

We are, it seems, to bring the passport.

young soldiers and airmen of Anna persuaded him that the Under the blessing of the new Germany over to wrong name had been entered nationalised medicine, I read, Britain, show them the military for nearly two years you feel no In her old passport.

it now takes eight months to mistakes their fathers madó, despair an Monday's curtain With the notepaper and official have a brace filted to a child's which lost Germany the war, and rirës, forms stolen from Krasnodar, teeth.

teach them how to do better sho forged documents and got On the other hand, the next time.

"dangerous

prisoners" business

spectacles

many released.

JOHNNY HAZARD

YOU SEEM TO HAVE SURVIVED YOUR SHIPWRECK, LORD BREWIS GO ON WITH YOUR STORY!

QUITE! I WAS

PRETTY WELL STIFFENED BY THE CRACKUP OF MY BOAT...

of

providing State Is briskening up. Aren't we wonderful?

"...WHEN'I AWOKE I FELT.WARM/ I OPENED MY EYED..." BER

I asked John Snarge 48) whether ho gois Feeling.

(aged

By Frank Robbins

50--if you are a self-employ ed writer, and a knight in the bargain, you do not even notice Monday's new leaf-turhing.

I asked several big business men. Or, rather, I tried to, but perhaps they were in their yachts or deep in the country protected by their butlers; no doubt taking Monday in much the same spirit as Sunday.

I did frack.

-pay.

opa down, however — tổ

A committco

Het tend new

meeting, lan

Sald the civil servant' with the brier case:

"I just walt patiently till it is over. After all, Tuesday is bound to come."

Safd the commissionare, with the wared moustache: "I think of Monday as the peak of the week. I look forward to it-

Ab 1. merk.

Rugby. I asked themselves.

once

pression paaced

13

de- has tho

week 18 ROT mal.

Bald the win- dow cleaner: "T go to the pictures on Monday... night to cheer my- Edit up."

fow

Yot

¿ people" cheer

up that was m

Mr Halford cinemas' and theatres are emp

Reddish (aged test, on Monday.

'54), a director

of the Post-

That a week and rise at rix 'on each

one. I like work."

So there we are, Advice from lond Coment all kinds, of all sorts, t Company, 1

My advice?...Treat yourself he got the Monday feeling? to the little extras on

"Oh no, I work seven days day. Go to your best lunch Mon- place, Walk the pleasantest way home. Have something extra good for supper.,

MAAND LOOKED INTO THE MOST AGELESS... THE UGLIEST FACE I HAVE EVER SEEN!'

Fiat cars

Model 1400

ONE-PIECE STRUCTURAL" CONSTRUCTION "FOR" "RIGIDITY:

Above all: Don't give in to that Monday Morning Feeling. Have you got.....:

it this

· FLOIT) = -| ing? Then fight it but fight it the cheerful way

Sing a song - even if your family thinks you have gone mud.

Plan your

summerhoil-.

days oven if

it is snowing and the wind cuts through your only topcoat;

m

· Decide to go to a h

and get fun, out of tuntiaputing.

thuhn. vouch

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