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7. Marriage by Proxy
Although it is rarely met with, there is a form of customary marriage by proxy, which has all the force of, and to all intents and purposes is, a kit fat (*), marriage. The bride comes to the groom's house and all the ordinary procedure of a wedding is observed, except that the groom is represented by a cockerel. It is possible that this custom arose from the lengthy absence of overseas Chinese from their homes. Certainly it is the bride who is always present; there is no customary marriage by proxy where the bridegroom is present and the bride absent.
8. Sam P'o Tsai (17)
(a) A sam p'o tsai (17) is a young girl who has been reared by a family not her own with the specific object of marrying her to one of the sons of that family. The practice is normally confined to poorer households which fear that, when their children reach marriageable age, the family may not be in a financial position to exchange the necessary gifts for betrothal. Failure to observe tradition in this respect would involve loss of face. A young girl will therefore be handed over to the family of the boy whom she is due to marry. Sometimes the bargain is free, sometimes a token payment is made, sometimes quite a large sum of money changes hands. The money is usually wrapped in red paper to ensure a lucky transaction. There is no fixed age for the entry of the girl into her new home. It may be when she is only a few years old or it may be when she is up to 15 years old. She becomes, until marriage, just another worker in the household.
(b) The sam p'o tsai (17) is traditionally carried into her new home on the back of a woman, under an open umbrella to which is tied a piece of red cloth. Sometimes, however, an older girl will be transported in a bridal chair. Crackers are fired and there is a sacrifice of chicken and pork to the ancestors, as well as a burning of joss sticks to inform the ancestors of the arrival of the girl into her new family.
(c) At the son's coming of age (between 16 and 18), the couple are ready to be married, provided the girl is sufficiently developed. If not, the ceremony is deferred. The ceremony