MUTT AND JEFF
'OH,BOY! I MUST RUSH AND TELL JEFF THE GLAD. NEWS! HB WON A CAR!!
JEFF YOU WON! YOU' WON THE CAR! WHERE ARE THE TWO TICKETS. YOU BOUGHT FOR
TWENTY CENTS?
YEP THIS IS THE WINNING TICKET ALL RIGHT, 28861..
A BRAND NEW EIGHT HUNDRED -DOLLAR CAR! THINK OF IT!
THE CHINA MAIL, AUGUST 20, 1988 By BUD FISHER
WELL, AINT CHA SURPRISED? AINT CHA GLAD? WHAT'S
THE MATTER?
7-16
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I'M JUST THINKIN WHAT A FOOL I WAS BUYING THIS
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GENERAL JAKE
AYBE you've heard of this old war- They lay in windrows.
Those who
dog Gen. Jake Sears. You must managed to find some sort of shelter
F
have. He's been cited for bravery a we routed out and either shot or bay- dozen times. Considered one of the oneted. It was gory and merciless and me if it wasn't inhuman- finest officers in the army, knows all damn the answers, as far as strategy is con- even for a war. cerned. Smart. A her
L
By the time that slaughter was fin- Well, maybe he was a hero. I sup- ished and our own wounded cared for pose any soldier is a hero who knocks and the outfit organized again, the the devil out of the enemy, not matter body of Germans left on the other side how he does it. That's war. Still of the river had built a pontoon bridge, somehow I'd always had a notion that and what with this and boats and rafts a hero was one who braved odds. Queer they were coming across with murder the ideas kids get. Queer the way in their eyes.
But General Jake had planned every- they stick with a chap as he grows older. At any rate, I was with Old thing. Before the first of the remain-· General Jake's outfit at Lameraux. ing body of Germans touched the Lam- Remember Lameraux? Sure, General eraux side of the river we were in re- Jake got his biggest medal for what happened at Lameraux.
treat, and a fast retreat at that, al- though there was plenty of time and nothing much to worry about.
Lameraux's a village, you know,
You see, the number of the Germans We'd been occupying it for a week. Our position wasn't strong. We knew who were left on the opposite side of that when the Germans got around to the river was only slightly less than it, they'd move în on us. We were all our own gang, and General Jake wasn't set to scram. That's a. queer thing taking chances. No, sir. Not Gener- about General Jake. He always clear- al Jake.
:
ed out when there was a chance of That evening we reached the town getting his hide punctured. I suppose of La Roche, which was occupied by it's considered strategy-not taking plenty of our boys, and there we made
camp. I don't know exactly what sort. chances.
Well, sir, the day, before the Boche of report General Jake turned in at moved in-of course we didn't know it headquarters, but I do know that he
By Richard Hill Wilkinson
.
a
was the day before until later-up was cited for the Lameraux episode comes a messenger from headquarters not long after. And I do know that with instructions for General. Jake to the American newspapers carried hold Lameraux as long as he could. I fine.account of the affair, explaining mean, headquarters knew General in detail how, though hopelessly out- Jake's tactics, and they didn't want numbered, General Jake, obeyed orders a gallant him walking out without some show of from headquarters, made resistance.
stand at the village of Lameraux, suc- General Jake smiled thinly to him- ceeded in killing several thousand of self and tore the orders into little the enemy, and then, because reinforce- pieces and throw the pieces away, And ments arrived, was forced to retreat, then the next day the Germans moved thereby saving the lives of more than in. We had ample warning. Every half his own outfit. thing was in readiness for a hasty and That's the sort of thing that makes efficient retreat. Of course, the smart a war hero, I guess. At any rate, thing to do was to blow up the bridge, that's the rank General Jake goes by Sometimes I amile which offered the only means of ap now-war hero. proach, before quitting the village, when I think of it. Maybe I'm dumb. all thereby impeding the Germans no end. Maybe I got this hero business Everyone expected orders to that ef- wrong. Maybe I don't know what you But one fect, but General Jake had a sly look have to do to get a medal.
his eyes. He was thinking of thing. I do know. I know what happen- those orders from headquarters, I ed at Lameraux, because I was there, guess, and thinking what folks might and I don't talk about it much. Bay if he retreated as he planned.
(Copyright, 1988, By The Associated Newspapers).
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So instead of ordering the bridge blown up, he issued some hurried in- structions. Then he started the re- treat. Two miles up the road he cir cled the outfit and headed back through| some woods. We waited at the edge of the woods for an hour, watching the Germans cross the bridge into the vil- lage. Then General Jake sent a mes-1 senger scampering off to the field sta- tion he had established.
Ten minutes later there was a ter-1 rific explosion. The bridge flew into the air like kindling wood. The Ger- mans who were on the Lameraux, side! stared in amazement, but their amaze- ment gave way to concern, for ipat
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then General Jake's boys came swarm- Dealers in Garden Seeds, Postage
ing out of the woods.
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bridge about three to one. We had the P.O. Box No 880 HONG KONG
What followed was pretty awful;
even for a war. Our men out-number-
ed those Germans who had crossed the
advantage of knowing just what we
were to do and having a flock of ma-k
chine gun sets up, ready for use, ava tay th
General.
11 Maybe you can, imagina, what...
upton