“Imagine My Embarrassment?”
(Continued from Page 1)
cital of his more brutal crimes in Chicago and in other criminal districts would secure for him a place in her affections. He in- terspersed these reminiscences with avowals of love and admira- tion for her. He informed her that she was respectively the berries,"
cheese," "the coffee," and that cream in his for her he would "shoot" de ̈ wolks" "bust open de whole wide would," and other strange pro- cesses, some of which are definite- ly not for publication.
Mrs. Perkins, on the other hand, interrupted continuously, producing tracts which Smasher threw on the floor. You will real ise, therefore, that the conversa- tion was hardly edifying, and would do no good by reporting it fully here. Let it suffice that Smasher seemed to be having the best of it because Mrs. Perkins protests became weaker and she and eventually weaker, gazed in dumb amazement at Smasher whilst he told her in no measured terms how he had "given the heat to two Chicago cops who tried to "pull a fast one on him,” how he had "blasted down” a smart bank cashier in Minneapolis, and how
once successfully machlad
ned no less than twenty-three members of a salesman's associa- " tion in Newark merely because he did not like the colour of the charabanc in which they were travelling.
we
And so this strange meal pro- gressed, and it was when-
I reached the coffee stage that became aware of the fact that an individual sitting by himself at a table in the corner of the res taurant was making frantic siguals to me. This individual was a peculiar-looking and ex- tremely wizened man of about fifty years of age, and it seemed possible that he desired above all things to talk to me about my companions.
I felt that I had gone so far into this adventure that the least I could do would be to see it through, and so excusing myself I walked over to the little man's able. He asked me to sit down. "I don't know who you are, Sir," he said in
quiet
and
You
nt I feel
friend in the
sait may be unknowingly ning into danger. I think I am right when I say that I believe the lady at your table has inform- ed you that she is Mrs. Honoria Perkins, the Life President of the All-Britain Elderly Women's Sout Saving Society, and that she is desirious of saving your souls.
"You are quite correct,” I said. "At the moment she seems to be concentrating on saving Mr. Bol- gutz's soul, yet at the time of leaving I think Mr. Bolgatz was getting very much the best of the argument In fact I would go so far as to say that his rather ad- venturous recitals concerning in- cidents in his misspent life and
I said
Fer shall
hook his head once more.
a sad business," he said, "but we must do something about it. Let's go outside and tele phone
We went out to the lobby and he disappeared into a telephone booth. I waited outside, smoked a cigarette, pondered on the strangeness of life, and what a marvellous story. I should have to ball in the paper. After a few -minutes he came out.
"It is all right,” he said, "I've telephoned, and they're going to have an ambulance waiting out- side. The thing to do is to go back and keep her at that table for
his continued entreaties that about another quarter of an hour,
lady should share a life of crime with him seem to be succeeding. amazing as that may sound.”
He shook his head sadly. "That woman is always caus- ing trouble," he said. "That was You why I wanted to talk to you see the point is this. My name is PoomerJohn Henry Poomer-
and Honoria is my sister She-h
of course hopelessly mad. She
or five days ago.. escaped four
from the mental home in which she is incarcerated, and we have been searching high and low for her She gets this mania about making herself up in the most blatant way and going about try- ing to save people's souls. I do hope she won't become violent”
I was petrified. After all, I had considered that my association with Bolgartz was necessary to my career on the Argus, but to be forced to dine in a public-res- taurant with a Chicago gangster and a woman lunatic was asking a great deal, even of a Rams- bottom. I sat there quite unde- cided, not knowing what to do Eventually, I asked my compan- ion if he had any ideas on the subject.
"I do not think I should do
at
anything," he said. You se. e shee it looks as if
the
quiet,
and
she
may
So. If we try to get her back to the asylum she'll pro- bably pick up a knife from the table and attack somebody. She's really rather awful you know. She killed two keepers and a tax- collector last
NEWS FLASHES
Franco's Policy
"Our policy," declared General Franco to Cecil Gerahty, "Daily Mail" correspondent in Spain, "will be eminently Spanish, and The decidedly anticommunist. state will be built up on totali- tarian lines, and the people will co-operate in the government of the state through the family, the municipality, and the corpora- tion Novels.
most
dist
religions
Bond
rence
some
ound, and as if religion had no part in life at all. The words "right and wrong and good and evil, as we know them. come into their ves
Trade
In spite of the Palestine, says orangs expo
five and six million cases in 1995- 1936 to over ten million in 1936 1937,
income of 3 divided Arab and
German Ex
Germans
increased 000, which was qually between
by which time the ambulance and the attendants will have arrived."
I agreed with this and we re- turned to the restaurant. Im- agine my horror when I saw that the table was empty and that both Smasher Bolgutz and Mrs. Honoria Perkins had gone. The an on the door at the Exclusive said that they had got into a cab
gone off while we were tele- phoning, and that in the cab Mrs. Perkins had embraced Smasher most warmly. It was in a very hopeless frame of mind therefore that I returned to the restaurant and sat down at the little man Poomer's-table.
He asked me if I would have drink and I said that I would like some brandy. I was feeling- very upset at the adventures of the evening, and I was fearfully perturbed about the awful fate
and real of this unfortunate brained woman who carried away
was about ten
wards that three
dark
uniforms came into the ant. They came straight over to our table and addressed myst
panion
"Come on now, Mr. Poomer," said one of them. We don't wan no trouble, do we now Come along, there's a good fellow.
Poomer said not a word. He merely got up and one of the me in uniform took him by the arm and led him out of the restaur- ant. I spoke to the other two..
"What is that?" I said. "Would you mind explaining?**
"Oh, it's all right, Sir," said one of them. "You see this fel- low Poomer escaped from Colney Hatch four days ago. We've been looking all over London for Mind you, he's not dangerous or anything like that **
I gasped.. "Do you mean to tell me that he's a madman most shrieked
One of the men nodded. "You're right
he said
"He's absolutely bats in the bel fry. He's fair cantion he is." A horrible idea entered head
me, I whispered, ho you know anything
She She's Permanent
All-Britain Saving Soci
Women's
E
young traine
control"
at Bedford
not at
"I can tell White Horse
blindfold! And to think that at one
time I used simply to ask for
White Horse is just like a fine liqueur
Sole Agents for
#14: JARDENÉ MA
and-soda!