THE CHINA MAIL FRIDAY SUPPLEMENT OCTOBER 15, 1937
BRUSH UP YOUR WITSM ODDITIES
A Case Of Kinship
ERE must have been а dearth of eligible young ladies in Kinsleydale, for each of five men there has married the widowed mother of one of the others. Jenkins's stepson, Tomkins, is the stepfather of Perkins. Jenkins's mother is a friend of Mrs. Watkins, whose husband's mother is a cousin of Mrs. Perkins.
→ What is the name of the step- son of Simkins?
The Two Clerks
"Which would you prefer," asked Mr. Cashbox of his two clerks, Jones and Smith, "£1,000 a year, rising by £200 annually, or £1,000 a year, rising by £50 every six months?"
"The former" said Jones. "The latter," said Smith. Which of them is right?
OLD PRICES
IN BOT LES LANGE 8 cz
SMALL az
Th
Busy Fly
Two cyclists, John and George start simultaneously from two points A and B, 60 miles apart, to cycle towards one another along a straight road. John goes : at 10 mp.h. and George at 15 m.p.h.
A fly, travelling at 20 m.p.h.. leaves. point A at the same time as John, and flies along the road till he meets George;. when he turns about and flies back again to John. He proceeds thus to fly back and forth until the two cyclists meet.
J
What distance has the fly then covered?
Popoff
"I have so built my house.” writes Professor Popoff, "that the windows on all four sides face south.”
How has the professor trived to do this?
NEW PRICES
(IN ECONOMY TINS)
LARGE 8oz. $ 1.20 SMALL 4oz. 659
Ask for ANDREWS în the ECONOMY TINS containing the SAME QUANTITY as the former bottles at LOWER PRICE.
Hitherio you have bought your Andrews Liver Salt in boifles. From now on it will reach you in the new Economy Tinand not only is it a still better Andrews than before--it will cost you less.
Years of patient research have proved that Andrews Liver Salt keeps better in the fin containers than in bottles. You will be" well advised to buy this better Andrews în lins, but Andrews in bottles will still be available for those who prefer them.
Andrews in the Economy Tin now available in this country is the same Andrews which, during nearly 50 years, has built up the largest sale of any saline in Great Britain: and the Dominions. You will find that a combines in a unique way the pleasant, invigorating qualifies of a refreshing saline with the cleansing properties of the Ideal Tonic Laxative. Its slom continuous
EFFERVESCENT
ANDREWS
LIVER SALT
GORATES
effervescence
which
affaci on. lining
THE
delicate stomach
You NEED Andraws if you suffer from :-
BILIOUSNESS CONSTIPATION HEADACHES FLATULENCE HEARTBURN- LASSITUDE.
LOSS OF APPETITE RHEUMATISM: LIVERISHNESS:
ANDREWS
LIVER SALT
-LARGEST SALE OF ANY EFFERVESCING SALT IN THE
Iron Tonic
A professional juggler was. a Philadelphia. challenged in saloon to swallow a certain num- ber of articles.
He swallowed. 208 in seven hours. They included:-
20 pieces of chain.
2 combs.
10. horseshoe nails. 54 wire nails. 35 nails.
8 screws.
50 buttons.
12 pins.
1 knife handle. Later he complained of pains, was ́ rushed to hospital and operated upon. He recovered and has now been sent home.
PEPPER AND SALT
His Finish
And then there was the wo- man who was "simply exhausted” after she had finished choosing a new spring outfit. We hear her husband was pretty well spent, too
** *
Awful Thought ́›
“And is this your ancestral home?" asked the film star.
"It is, darling."
"Well, it looks mighty familiar. Are you sure we haven't married before?"
*
器
***
The Economist
been
Then there was the wee wife who always cooked much more for dinner than was used, because, if she don't she would be unable to economise by making left-over
dishes.
*
Short Odds
*
Wife: "Present-day clothes for women have a splendid finish,
haven't they, darling?”
Husband (racing fan),
"Yes,
but the starting price is ter- rible!"
*
*
*
He Knew
"I'm afraid the new servant is dishonest."
"But you shouldn't judge by appearances.".
"I don't I judge by disappear-
*
Flood Song
"There are wherries at the bot- tom of my garden.”
Cart Before Horse
The shopkeeper got a shock when he received this order,
"One woolly man's vest, a soft gent's collar, a square waiter's apron, and one pair of black
Prevention Doctor: "What's the
201
ure and I've paies in
me back, sor."
Doctor (handing him a bottle): “Well, take a dose of this a quar
ter of an hour before you feel the pains coming
12
Twice Running
During the filming of a scene. in Max Miller's latest comedy, being made at Teddington stu- dios, Betty Lynne, the leading lady, had to throw things, includ- ing a vase of flowers, at him. The vase hit him in the eye.
He had to stop work to be treated, so his "stand-in” re- hearsed the scene. They tried throwing from a different angle.
This time the vase hit the stand-in and gashed his cheek.
*
NEST EGG
It has taken a special Act of Congress to get her money back for Mrs. Ada S. Lewis, who thought a hen's nest the safest place in which to hide a $10 United States Government bond 17 years ago. It was hen-pecked « when she retrieved it.
Granny Repents
con-
An aged grandmother's -science has stirred her to send to the LNER at York 5s. for a "fraud" of years ago.
When she took her grandchild. 2 few days more than three years old, on a journey, she pretended that the child was under three and needed no ticket.
Sending the fare, the grand- child. now a grown-u0 woman, explained, "Grandmother is very old now, and the fact is worry- îng her considerably. She cannot. rest until the fare, which we cal- culate is 5s, is paid. so I am en- closing a nostał order for that amount. Yours faithfully, Her Granddaughter.”
Solution to "Brush Up Your Wits"
1.-A Case Of Kinship
Denote Tomkins, Perkins, Jen- kins, Simkins and Watkins by A, B, C. D and E; their mothers by a, b, c, d and e.
Then we have at once: Men A B C D E. Wives b not e a not a
once
from which it follows aft that E married d, B married c and D married e
Hence Watkins is the stepson of Simkins,
2. The Two Clerks
Smith is right.
3. The Busy Fly
Forty-eight miles.
For John and George are proaching one another at m.p.h. and therefore will be cycle ing for 24 hours before: meet. And at 20...
in 2.4 hours will cov
4. Popoff
The professor had built his
Pole house at the