THE CHINA MAIL, MAY 18, 1937.

THE

BRITISH SUBJECT MAY BE

WORLD ABOLISHED

GOES BY

MARK Twain was upon one

OC-

term.

There is a strong impression in Parliamentary circles in Cape Town that, after the Imperial Con- ference, the designation "British subject," "as the description con- noting all members of the British Commonwealth, may be abolished casion travelling with

a more general friend in an out-of-the-way place in and replaced by Europe where he heard no English spoken for days at a time. Alight- Although the Union Government ing at a railroad station one day has no intention of interfering with he beheld on the station platform the position enjoyed by nationals anfong the crowd a very beautiful of the Dominions, the view is held in some quarters that the term girl.

"British subject" does not correctly define the status as understood to- day.

**

In his delight he called out to his friend, feeling perfectly safe in the English speech in that unknown It has been suggested that a more town: "Say, Ned, come here quick general term, such as "Subject of and see the most gloriously beauti-the King," would be more in accor ful girl you've ever clapped eyes on,? dance with the present constitu- tional position and would raise no Whereupon the young Woman

misunderstanding on such turned and said in flawless Eng-

ques-

lish: "I thank you more, sir, for the

as the divisibility of the evident sincerity of your compli- ment than for the extraordinary publicity which you give it.”

The golf world is involved at the moment in a controversy of appal- ling dreariness concerning the origin of Vardon's celebrated swing.

If you ever get dragged into it by some mischance, take a firm line, and make a declaration thus:

tions Crown.

It is clear however, that any such decision. could only be reached as the result of general agreement and (there is no reason to believe that

the Union will force the issue.

OKAY AND LOUSY

AMERICA'S PET WORDS

MERICA'S ten "most over- "The origin of Vardon's swing is

worked words,” according to well known to me, and to only two Mr. Wilfred J. Funk, dictionary- other people in the world. It is a maker, with the classes most res- secret. Even among gntlemen Iponsible. for "over-working” them could not reveal it. Were I to do are:- 80, your blood would freeze and every hair on your heats stand up- in horror, shame, and pity."

+

A lot of confused mumbling will ensue. This you quell by casting a glance around and adding with quiet emotion.

"Jim Bludso of the Mounties, the whitest man, bar one, I ever knew He took it on himself to shield a pal..It involves the honour of a good and beautiful woman.

"

Any Old Harrovians present will then straighten their ties, cough, and change the subject, and retire victorious. -

Arthur Wimperis, as lissome

you

a

1, Okay

Children and shop- girls; 2, Terrific - All persons exposed to Hollywood for more than twenty-four hours; 3, Lousy

Same as 2; 4, Contact - Ad- vertising workers; 5, Definitely

Society; 6, Gal Broadway- ites; 7, Racket Tradesmen; 8, Swell ----- Interior decorators; 9, Impact Columnists and com~ mentators; 10, Honey Stock- brokers.

Society's use of "definitely," says Reuter, amuses Mr. Funk, becauser "The joke is they think it's an aristocratic English word.”

He attributes the craze in U.S. to British-mindedness induced by the Jubilee and the Coronation. Mr. Funk also selected the ten wit as ever jangled bells, described most beautiful words in the lan- Dr. Czinner, husband of Miss Berg-guage Dawn, hush, lullaby, mur- ner, in the Law Courts the other muring, tranquil, mist, luminous, day as "one of the most obedient chimes, golden and melody. and amenable husbands and direc tors I have ever seen.”

Habitues of Kensington Gardens have often seen the Doctor flying over the treetops with a message

When A Motorist Falls Asleep

from Miss Bergner for the birdies, A motorist who falls asleep while but what is not generally known is driving his car cannot legally plead that a naughty fairy named Mr. it as an excuse for an offence. Dickery Dock (who lives in a hidey- This was decided by the Lord hut near the Broad Walk) always Chief Justice, Lord Hewart, and tries to make hint disobedient by Justices Macnaghten and Singleton, waving an old sock full of the sighs in a King's Bench Divisional Court- of motherless dormice and shouting A motorist summoned at Hull for "Hey! come and have an ache, driving without due care and at- sport!"

tention pleaded that his car swerv

But Dr. Czinner knows that if heed and hit two trees because he sud- flew down to have a wee, enjoyable denly fell asleep. ache with Mr. Dickery Dock it would A ́ stipendiary magistrate dis- lead to the usual old fairy brawl, missed the information, holding that nips and kisses being exchanged a motorist who momentarily slept among the whole fairy population because of tiredness was in the same in the • proportion of 46 to 64, and category as a person taken ill while drawing-room window would be shut driving, and was not responsible for and Miss Bergner would be playing what occurred. tag with a lot of gnomes, having Lord Hewart said there was, ab forgotten him utterly.

yet, no authority for the propost-

So he flies on, not even putting tion that a motorist who fell asleep out his tongue, and when he gets could not commit an offence against back there are scrumptious things the Road Traffic Act, and the court for tea.

held that the magistrate was wrong.

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