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HERE, THERE
and
EVERYWHERE
Chinese To Them ·
In the mess at the depot of a
famous British regiment hangs
л
painting of "Chinese". Gordon.
-MONDAY, JULY 10, ` 1933.
LOW AND TERRY AT
THE CONFERENCE
"PANAMA DELEGATES"
CRASH THE GATES
Thereon the artist painted an in- STRANGE LANGUAGES AND DRINKS
scription in Chinese characters. What it meant nobody knew, but it was presumed that it was a eulogy of the famous general.
London. But it was much the same
I don't know how it is with you, wherever we went, and beveral times
A short time ago a distinguished but I find this economic stuff dread-Low, finding as caught in a group Chinese visitor was lunching at the fully hard to understand. I've tried of different nationalities, started a mess when he caught sight of the to grasp it, because with the poor world conference on the burden of his suburb. I don't picture. He blinked, and then old world in its present state It's up the rates in smilingly asked if his hosts were to all of us don't you think?-to think they understood what he was on the brain-power at the talking about, but they all listened aware that the inscription had turn
maximum voltage. Often, lately, very politely, and made sympathetic been copied from a soap wrapper've been unable to go to sleep after exclamations like "Hell!" and, lunch for worrying about everybody "Bien!" and "Buenos dina!” and The Phantom Governor |being in debt and food and goods "Skaa!!" and a Japanese Pressinan Mr. Montagu Norman, has being so cheap that only the very asked, please could be get a copy of double-a double whose resem-rich can afford to buy them. Low's honourable speech from the blance to the Governor even de- And that's where I leave the rails bureau-later on to transmit it to his and go over the embankment. Ijobjectionable newspaper? After a
•
+
Mr. Norman will be elated. Now
ceives his best friends.
The double is Count Montrelas, the head of an ancient Bavarian can't see it. Low doesn't make it while I got talking to a Ruritanian family, and now a journalist in any easier. He says it's because I secretary-a beautiful girl she was haven't got an economic mind. The-behind a large palm on the stairs, his black hat and black coat he is
great thing necessary, he told me, about the three-penny-bit nuaisance. the very spit of Mr. Norman.
was to raise prices all round. Every-She said she was generally free Just before Parliament rose re-
was too cheap, and what about nineteen-thirty, which seemed cently, Count Montgelas was walk-thing Ing in one of the corridors of the the world needed, he said, was a odd-I mean, you expect a girl to be House of Commons with Major statesman who could show us the late, of course, but three years,.. I way to raise the prices of food and However, it turned out that was the Ralph Glyn. Mr. Baldwin passed,
the commodities so as to put them once Continental way of saying 7.30 p.m. waved a band, and greeted Count with a cheery, "Hello, more within the reach of the verv So I was about to say that I knew ja remarkable little restaurant where Governor." The Bavarian was em poorest.
"Isn't that clear?" he said. they had some embossed threepenny- barrassed.
"No," I said.
bita that she 'ought to see, in order "Then we'll go along to the World to understand the subject thorough- h need bother no more about Pro- fessor Skinner and other pseudon-Economic Conference," he said, "andly, when I noticed a black-bearded making "imperative ymes. He can travel simply and there you'll hear the whole thing ex gentleman plained."
įsignals to me from an alcove on the safely as Count Mantgelas.
I thought it was a good sugges- landing above. tion, because obviously it wasn't So I asid. "Excuse me, pnadige jlikely that a brainier bunch of frau," and bounded downstairs, economic scholars than that as thinking he might be her husband. Mrs. Holdman expresses sincere six weeks ago. Dr. Frank was
sembled in the Geological Museum But he caught me. FIRST EVE: What did you hear would ever be seen again. It was Chanks to all friends who have been officially informed, as he stepped
"Sh!" he said, putting a dirty Bo kind to her during her and ber-out of his aeroplane, that his at the opera yesterday?
true that Panama was too busy to finger to his lips; and started pour- desir- SECOND: All sorts of things attend, owing to the fine summer ing out a torrent of talk which I Dr. Court and the nursing staff at able," and that he would not be Smith is going bankrupt, Mrs. being so good for the hat trade, and couldn't understand, except that it eavement, especially to Dr. Moore, coming was "not very
current Brown has dyed hair, and the that was a nasty blow; but the other hadn't anything to do with the Buri- the Kowloon Hospital, also for the allowed to speak on
political questions. The Nazi Whites are having a divorce.
sixty-six nations had all sent their tarian secretary. I'm thankful to attendance at the funeral.
Minister of Justice therefore
financial experts. So I agreed to say. So I told him I feared he was addressed his Austrian fellow- - FOOD FOR THOUGHT
number and should Nazis on the subject of the Dinner: You seem to keep this, and we set out at once for South on, the wrong
Kensington.“
press Button B. Whereupon he The China Mail liberation of Vienna from the hotel remarkably clean.
On the way, Low said we ought to began again in broken English, and Turks. 250 years ago, skilfully Waiter (beaming): I'm glad you.
be prepared to address the Con-it seemed he was an emissary from insinuating, so it is reported, think so, sir.
ACKNOWLEDGMENT.
solicited visit of the Bavarian Minister of Justice to Vienna
Your Daily Smile
WHAT THEY GO FOR
•
*
*
■
Hong Kong, Monday, July 10, 1933 that the enemy from whom Dinner: Yes, rverything I eat ference about something to do with some outlandish country who want
was
Dr. Dollfuss At Bay.
BY THEIR HABITS----
cab.
Looked Like Hotel
economics, in case Mr. MacDonald ed to negotiate a loan for 10,000,000 Vienna ought now to be rescued[tastes of soap.
called upon us, and he proposed that Stivas or something, secured on the his Dr. Dollfuss and staunchest supporters
the should draw the!
the delegates' at- Banana Monopoly. I promised to A FEW TOO MANY. Heimwehr-and this in spite of "Darling," he coed, "have you ever tention to the burden of the rates in mention it to Mr. Chamberlain (be- his suburb, while I might say a few cause I was anxious to get back to The diminutive Chancellor of the fact that the Heimwehr kissed a man before, or has any man words about the threepenny bit the other landing), but he said five Austria, Dr. Dollfuss he is just were themselves simultaneously)kissed 'you?
nuisance. They might not be topics shillings on account would be very under five feet in height is be-celebrating the defeat of the "Y-yes," she stammered. coming a considerable figure in Turkish army in 1683, though "Tell me his name, then," he of world-shaking importance, he welcome, so I gave it to him. And Central European affairs. He is drawing, in veiled language, cried, "and ru go and thrash him." Bald, but they had a distinct econ- when I bounded upstairs again, the We Ruritanian secretary had bounded fighting for his position against quite different lessons from the "Oh, Hector," she gasped, "rmomic and monetary bearing. both home and foreign attackers, same historical event. The Nazi afraid he might be too many for accordingly swatted them up in the somewhere else. and is so far holding his own emissary received further rebuffs you."
- Labour Thrown Away'
Another resemblance to an hotel with tenacity and courage. He as he retired towards the Ger recently paid a sucessful visit to man frontier, and he left the
However, it was labour thrown was the reception-room at the main Rome, where he has clearly country threatening that Herr SPINKS (meeting old land-lady) away, as it turned out, because al-entrance. established excellent personal re-Hitler would avenge him. Re Pardon me, madam, but you remem-though we had passes that admitted There was a man in uniform out- lations with both Signor Mus- prisals have in fact been quickly ber me at your house four years us to the rest of the building, we aide the door and a person like a solini and the Vatican. The devised by the German Govern-ago.
couldn't get into the actual con-head porter inside, and an inquiry Duce is known to be most ment. Their principal measure, LANDLADY: Well, well I should terence chamber. The official on counter with men behind it who an- favourably impressed by his per- has been to strike Austria in her just think I do! My! How you used the door said that only delegates swered you in any tongue you liked sonality, and the Chancellor is most sensitive point the tour-to put the buttter on your bread! were allowed in, and every delegate to speak. While Low was standing said to be satisfied that an inde-ist traffic, which she has done!
had a special ticket. Low Isn't there brushing up his Latvain a lady pendent Austria has a warm her utmost during recent years
eastly dashed, and he made a dar came in, followed by a taxi-cabman MRS. SWIFT: Good! Now, he ing attempt to retrieve the eltuation. carrying a portmanteau which was friend in Italy and Signor Mus- to foster, and with such auccess solini. With the Pope Dr. Doll-as to compensate her partially can walk!
|He said: * "But regardez, Monsieur! covered with foreign hotel labels, so fuss has concluded a Concordat, for her post-War economic isola- MRS. SWIFT: Good! Now he We are ze Panama delegates. Aren't that people should think she was a the main points of which are re-tion. But last year almost three-can walk the floor by himself at we, Sancho?"
One; and she said to the linguist; ported to be the full administra quarters of the foreign visitors alght!
"Ja," said. “Oui! tive freedom of the Church in to her Alpine districts were Ger-
"Our Government she change it with bathroom attached, and will Austria, the regulation of the mans; and even if the average
Facts You Did Not mind, n'est-ce-pas?" he went on. position of Bishops between the has usually been somewhat less
Know. Government and the Church, the-for many British, American, recognition of Catholic mar- and Italian tourists are showing ringes in Civil Law, compulsory an increasing appreciation of the increased from 20 to 40 per cent serel' fan't that right, Sancho?" religious instruction in primary beauty and inexpensiveness of the minimum amount of domestic schools, and a pledge of freedom travel in Tirol the prohibitive butter that must we contained in given by the Austrian State to fees placed by the German Gov-margarine sold for local consump Catholic popular institutions. ernment on German travellers tion.
HIS WORRIES OVER
The Netherlands government has
*
"I want a suite on the first floor
"She hear ze call of your so wonder you send up tea in half-an-hour?”. ful London policeman, Senor, and (Continued in Page 10.) Jahe say, 'Ach! Panama must be
"Si, si, caballero!" I said. But it wouldn't wash. The official acted, as if the thought had didn't actually say we were liars, buti
crossed his mind, and we had to turn;
through the door we could see the
In addition to this equitable to Austria is a heavy blow to agreement in religious affairs one of the few growing indus- Orders are issued to automoblie AWAY. the Austrian Chancellor has tries of the country. The retalia drivers in a Connecticut city by loud. It was very sickening, because been attending to the mundane tory measure of the Reich Gov-speakers along main streets instead delegates rising to points of order, business of trying to secure ernment was nominally taken, of of requiring the employment of credits for his country's Im-course, in the interests of the several motorcycle policemen. and moving that the speaker be no poverished Treasury. Here also German travellers themselves.
* SCARE SOLVED.
Little Girl Clears Train Mystery.
"MURDER
FRENCH POLICE BAFFLED
Orleans.
longer heard, and playing cards in he seems to have received as According to the official decree At German aviator recently
the rear seats; and Mr. MacDonald A little girl of 12 has solved the surances that must be satis- the visa fee of thousand established a record by carrying starting a speech about the eyes of mystery of a blood-stained compart factory to him. The Italian marks was imposed in an en- 200 pounds of mail a distance of the wurrold being on the Conferencement in a train from St. Etienne, Government are understood to deavour to protect "German tra- of 78 miles from Vienna in a motor-We should have loved to have been which when it was discovered re-
inside. be ready to furnish their share vellers from unpleasant inci-less gliding plane 'in an hour and
cently threw the officials into con- The Long Bar of the fresh loan, of which the denta" to non-Nazi Germans 40 minutes.
sternation, coming ko soon after the terms were recently negotiated this tender solicitude must seem
Still, the rest of the building was murder on the same stretch of line: Junder the auspices of the singularly ironical; and the resThere is admittedly considerable open to us, and there was really of Mademoiselle Honorine Pralut.
League; but in this connexion son given for the reprisal was support for German National more going on there, in fact, the The coach was uncoupled and the difficulty is that, while Italy, that the Austrian Government Socialism and for union with place was like an hotel with its placed under official seal, and de- France, and Great Britain are had forbidden in Austria the Germany within Austria. But lounges, and bars and writing rooms tective have since been scouring the trying to maintain the financial wearing or display of the Nazi Dr. Dollfuss is the responsible and telephone boxes-lifts Dying up line for the victim's body, and economic independence of uniforms, flags, signs, and "other representative of his country to and down-strangers dashing about To-day Simmone Poirier peeped Austria, Germany is trying to emblems of the movement foreign countries; and he is de-and mich a gabble of foreign timidly into the police station here [ruin it. To Germany Dr. Doll though any other signs or cm-finitely opposed to the machina languages as we had never heard be- and asked for the commissioner. fuss is the enemy, because he is blems but those approved by the tions of his Nazi compatriots and fore especially in the sort of speak "I have come to explain about the resisting, with something of the Nazi Government are of course their German allies. So long as easy on one of the upper floors murder all the newspapers are talk- dictatorial vigour and pro totally suppressed in Germany, there are no defections from his where there was a lovely long bar ing about" she said, adding meekly pagandist enthusiasm of Herr The policy of Herr Hitler towards own supporters he seems to be and experts from all over the globe "It was mi-solve to Hitler Himself, the combined Austria is in fact one of arrogant fully capable of defending his sat round little oak tables with The bewilderment of the Police efforts of the German and interference with Internal Aus-country's independence, and strange drinks, discussing the pro- Commissioner was dispelled when
Nazis to Austrian
trian affairs by bringing Indirect elsewhere than in Germany his blems of the day and how to save Simmone explained that her nose Austria. The formal
pressure to bear upon the head gallant stand will be watched the world from ruin till they could simply would not stop bleeding in attempt began with
present Government with considerable sympathy, hardly speak for laughing
the train on Friday-Reuter.