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The China Mail.
"TRUTH, JUSTION, PUBLIC SERVICE"
HONGKONG, SATUrday, Nov. 19, 1991.
·EGO
ADVERSARIA.
THE CHINA MAIL.
QAVE.
SATURDAY. NOVEMBER 19,- 1921.
on airs?""What do they know of
And here, by the way, bones that it is most unlikely (if I gets colic, with that of your cheerful Flanders mud, who did their soldier-
I remember that there may say so reverently) that any will pessimist tortured as Job was, ing on Stonecutters?" There you ÁNARLEY YOW are some people who take the trouble to sort and label
Before I went home sick a like me, in spite of my them as Mutton bones or Gost bones.
ART few days ago, I was looking have two typical attitudes, repeat-naughty ways, of which these adver- One tag should cover the heap, and at a picture with a friend of ed with variations throughout the saria are only a part, and that what that marked Compost. We are not mine. He began to jeer at the artist's correspondence. No outsider reading I have written may cause some of the stuff that martyrs are made of ¦ idea of the wake of a boas, which to the letters would be likely to gather them to track me to my lair, und offer because martyrs see down one side of my taste or judgment was pretty near- the actual crux, which is made up consolations, a lot friends did. their noses only, and so walk, as it ly right. I said: Don't say a word of the forthcoming visit of a Keep hay! Although Lean manage were, with head askew, and incline to more. I've got your measure. You Prince, bis expressed wish to meet ill, I say and starlif fussed over. If each side of the nose, and each one preciate art. You've been reading
to be cheerful by myself, when I am get left. Having a working eye on are too full of art criticism to ap comrades of the war, the Legion I peg out, you have my toodleoo and doing its sharo, we know (don't we?) hooks about it, and you are so full of committee's assumption that this best chin-chins here. If I don't, I'll which aide of the street got cliches that every time one tickles wish was the same as a wish to meet i see you later. Cheerio.
most sunshine. As coral insects your memory, you feel obliged to So far as the Great building a reef, theagh as scratch. No art can ever be a joy to the members of the Legion, and last, but not therefor, least important, the Great Dinner Jacket Stipulation, which I noted last week. "It is not true that the invitation to the last Legion affair was thus worded:
"Come, ye heroes, come to the dance. All ye who toiled and fought and suffered in dirty khaki, unshaven, unbathed, lousy, itchy, soiled and grubby, come in your hundreds and come in your Tuxedos."
sialist are two things, though both be green, and smooth where they might
be crinkled, and that it is no use
AS IT LEAVES
ME AT PRESENT."
LAUGH
a
I don't know, said I. But I know now. I'm s sick man.
Please, Mr. Editor, let me know Eb? when you've had enough. and we feel kind o' sorry for those Enough now. I should think so-in others, and decide to paddle round in the circo. the nice shiny ocean and make the| best of what is luft. You'd almost think some of these earnest ones expected to live for ever, and after that leave a monument that would
last for several more evers.
TO THE
is
SPECIAL CABLE.
IZRA BROTHER? AGAIN.
SHANGHAI LAWSUIT BEGUN.
̈¦(China. Mail SPECIAL.
SHANGHAI, NOT, 19,
tention was begun yesterday in the A case arousing bonsiderable at British Supreme Court. Hefore Judge Skinner Turner Ellis Ezra sought to recover possession of certain properties on which he borrowed money from his brother Isaac Ezra. The evidense reforred to vast sums and properties of the Eara family. Four leading couned are employed in the case which was adjourned.
TAIKOO'S TALKERS.
You see how it is, your REBATING SOCIETY BEGINS, follows? The spirit LADS
willing but the carcase is crocked. Be indulgent. If I get over this, I will be dulcet next week
A MOOK "ELECTION."
Although no announcement abont or bust. If I don't get over it, but it appeared in the newspapers there pass to that bourne where, for obvious was a Parliamentary election at Tai-- reasons as Shakspere said, newspapera koo list night. It was a rock ope or any other such inflammable things and figured as the first item on the cannot be, do not give way to idle agenda paper of the Taikoo Club tears but hustle round for some other Debating Society.
A MARTY Budget Joke (or collec-unconscious of the end as they, we you. You miss its message. You tion of jokes) is concora like, to shove, our mite on the accre- cannot see. Your tongue fapt about ed, the leader writers|tion, and say this place where we in front of your eyes.”
He looked at me astonished. have forestalled me.. There was that put it appears to be about the right one about every man Jack in the level. But we don't get hot about it "What's the master with you?", Civil Service being able to earn twice when the others add a storey, nor demanded he. the money he does, for far less ex-demand Banishment Ordinances for penditure of time and brain. Do not them. Bless you, we know the Sure jump to the conclusion that I mean and Certain and Final Banishment the joke is on the man who made that Order is on the way to each of us, claim. If I did, I would not hesitate to say so, for the Governor and I are Excuse me while perhaps the only two men who can I finish a par-afford to laugh at being laughed oxysm of cough-at. No. The joke is that the ing. Another very men who guffawed at the ides laughable matter of M
getting $1000 is that while I am trying, to amuse month anywhere, or of Mr. you I am very ill and suffering serious
getting $600 did not see that But cities and, thrones and pains, so that I wish it was over, and His Ex. was having a quiet dig at I could share the peace of the lads who them, in his own humorous way,
powers stand in Time's eye did not return to join or scorn the which involves, I'm sure,
Somewhat as do the flowers much
which daily die.. Legion. You may not see the hum laughter "up the sleeve.'
།pm our of that unless explain, though taking it that he was alluding to some But it doesn't matter misquoting I'm not sure of that "somewhat,” perhaps those who dislike me may commercial salaries paid here, and the manage a laugh. In addition to five- (ahem) expenditure of time and brain Kipling-be hasn't written a poem ly rheumatic aches, I have a very bad that serves to earn them. I had a one can really spoil, in that way, not cold, which has developed a racking hearty laugh myself, because really, to say spoil. congh, which hurts my goitre, and in a government department, some of nearly chokes me into apoplexy. With our it I have fever, rising at times higher perhaps not make good" as do well paid taipans would than even I can joke about. At this the officials they
criticise. point (bera's where I think the laugh All the world, barring one small comes in) when I was comparing my-village at the back of South Americs, self with Job, one of my teeth began and the crew of a windjammer stuck. to ache! Toothache, on top of that in the Antarctic, has heard my opinion complication of bodily ills, really of the cadet system; but you should struck me as a funny anti-climax. hear my confidential opinion of our Anyway, I intend to laugh and get junior taipans. Expenditure better. I don't intend to take up brains.? I should smile. If Crown Land in Happy Valley, if I But excuse me a moment. Here cau avoid it.
they bring one of the umpteen medi- cines I am supposed to take. Ugh! Here's how. Same to yourself, and many of 'em.
AGAIN THE
LEGION
A thing very laugh- abic (as showing how
wise Puck was, and what fools we mortals be) is that throughout this long and vigorous controversy, in which so much has been said about whether
:
of
the
To printer's messenger: How many sheets have you carried so far?
P.M.: I don't know, Sir.
Me: Don't you think you've got about enough to satisfy the Foreman?
P.M. I don't know, Sir. Me: Q, dear. How monotonous is the conversation of printers' messen- gera. H'm, I suppose I'd better try to squeeze oué another paragram.
the Daily Press leaders. Some of Labour) and Mr. J. Simpson (Coali way of wooing cheerfulness. Read Mr. D. B. Bone (Independent them are really funny without being tion) were the candidates and Mr. 8. vulgar.
LOCAL AND GENERAL.
A quantity of household furniture will be auctioned be Messrs. Lammert Bros. on Monday,
New Vehicles
and Traffic
Ordinance regulations are published in the Government Gazelle.
The Hon. Mr. Bird made ME. BIRD'S & suggestion regarding
One case of plague and another SUGGESTION, land sales, here that of diphtheria, both Chinese, were hot. deserved more attention ified on Thursday, so one of enteric than it seems to have got. A fever, Portuguese. really excellent suggestion. I have
+
Boulton, president of the Debating Society, acted as Returning Officer.
The Labour candidate was ințio- duced by Mr. D. McNellie who made a brief speech in the course of which he declared that the Labour Party contained more students of politics and economics than any other party and contested the truth of Mr. Churchill's allegation that Labour had.
administrative talent."
Mr. Bone, who spoke tom manu- script, in commeng linself to the suffrages of the vectors, told them, at
I the outset that he was not going to
At the close of his speech the
barrage of questions which ranged candidate was subjected to a small from a suggestion that the rate of the dollar should be permanently fixed at 6a. 7d, to a request for his views on the subject of probibition.
make any promises since it would be many years before the beneficial re- sulta of the reforms proposed by the I wish I were healthy selling its land privately, and I was the Governor has given his assent, on
always been against the Government The Gazette announces that .. babour party would be felt. Before civilisation could progress much ANOTHER and in form. I believe genuinely shocked when I read that behalf of the King, to the Budget Bill they would have to sink their
SMILE. I could show you a in certain special cases they had done passed by the Legislative Council.
"I desire for immediate benefits in favour smile or two in those so. Yet I appreciate the grievance our stay-at-home soldiers are or are costly (I had almost written costive) of these parties who, having taken all
of their sacred duty to posterity. Mr. not eligible for membership of the quarters for Government servants; the trouble and paid the expense of the Colony for the year commencing Nations, urged the necessity for Valuation of the tanements in Bone championed the League of Legion, not one has taken the trouble those with the tennis courts that cost getting the land put up, find them- July 1, 1922 must be made before abolishing the caus:a of war, to refer to the rules of that associa $17,800. Surely you can seo
selves outbid by richer men, who can April 30, 1922 or as soon after as tion, and so get his premisses right. sailent features of the joke for your afford to go beyond what the land is possible.
spoke of improving the educa- Under the heading of membership," self. The Morning Post rubbed it worth to them.
tional system and went on to deat it says very plainly that "The mem-in very neatly, I thought, on Thurs appears to have get the idea from the Mr. Bird, who
with the question of unemployment. bership may include all ranks who day, when it instanced that as the practice at Macao, suggested that the tisement for she joint service of the problem was the nationalisation of the Attention is called to the adver- His panaces for the last mentioned have served or are serving in the most expensive bit of road material original applicant, when the lot is Hongkong, Canton and
Army, and on record. The excuse of the D.P.W knocked down, should be Royal Navy, the
Macao land, which, he thought would help Royal Air Force and Colonial that the decision to give each house the option of taking it
given Steamboat Co., and the China the housing question along towards a and Buxiliary Forces," Doesn't a tennis court to itself was influencod
at Navigation Co., Ltd. as amended in solution, and the organised distribu- The time for by their need for filling for the road, he could attend the sale and not
that price. that settle it?
If this were done, this issue.
tion of the product of industry. the real heroes of the trenches--the reminds me of Mrs. Profyteer's res- bid at all, it others were after it. comrades of the mud and slime-to son for buying the grand piano. "It's Knowing that the original applicant Government on, Inland Lot No. 1689 A memorial of re-entry by the Lick about the inclusion in the League trae," she said, "that none of us can would have this option, other hidders has beez, registered according to law. of carpet-soldiers was when that rule play it, but look what a lot o' flower- would be obliged to offer a fair price, Cancellation of re-entry on Lots Nos, was being passed. Their protests pots and knicknacks I can put on top." come too late, That does not justify When it comes to figures, I'd just as than it is worth, for the reason that 317 has also been registered.
and they dare not offer winch more 175 and 209 Demarcation District No. the Committee in interpreting the soon be not at home to callers. it might be left on their hands. I Pinces expressed wish (if his words generally get them all sparled and think that this ensures fair prices for
In introducing the Coalition can were as I got them) into a desire to ravelled.
Lieutenant-Commander R, didate, Mr. M. J. Eldridge pointed to But how about these? meet the members of the League. Those houses are to cost $600,000 grievance. Where does the laugh navigation officer of the "Titania" the Coalition during the war and public land, while removing a real Gregory has been appointed the successful results achieved, by Even then I am sure H.R.H. would apiece, which at eight per cent. vould come in bere? Don't worry. It does submarine depot ship, Hongkong, and maintained that there were still many crying over milk already well watered? not discriminate between those who mean monthly rent of $400 per come in, right enough, The joke is to the charge of the Chart and Baro huge problems which party politics Yet verily I suppose that so long as served at the front and those who month. They will be let to Civil that because it is such a simple and meter Depot on arrival here. small boys have guts, they will fill served elsewhere.
Servants who will pay six per cent. of easy and good method they will not
would never solve them with unripe gooseberries. Where the Committee, or whoever their salaries, or day) from $56 to adopt it. You'll ses. If they do,
Mr. Simpson, after urging that the Nevertheless (and for this you may was responsible for the Legion's $45 a month, according to size of the laugh is at me, so you'll have it, given three months to show why it ed before party politics pointed to The Ying Fat Un Company is country's welfare should be consider- thank my habit of reading wide and last stant,
did err, was
in salary. Said tenants probably had a somehow. And I'm sure you are should not be struck off the Register. the example of Australia and wanted deep) it is written that they shall yet stipulating for "dinner jackets." The rent allowance double that. It is kindly welcome. Ladies and gentlemen, become men, if they live long enough, membership includes, according to true that if they had to pay market
The names of the Chun Kwok Hong to know what the Labour Party and all ye ruddy and and their sutures be not too firmly their own rules, "all ranks, and all rates, we should have to increase CONTRA. gallant muglitters, tripe knitted. That man is the only animal ranks do not wear dinner jackets.
The same speaker Oriental Securities and Finance Co., He asserted that in New South Lee Steamship Co., Ltd, and the had done for the Commonwealth. their pay.
But would it be a
THE CHEERFUL. (Mr. Bird) has not Ltd., have already been struck off the Wales where MUNDUM. eaters, and good-timers that laughs is a proposition contradict-
hardship to make them pay as much
the pleasure and
there was as may not considered by some men that laugh and by
rent as their former house allowance
profit of
Register.
Labour Government the State was yourselves embraced by that polite some that do not, or only wryly, and it apostrophe, be so good if you please may well be that the contradictors
on the verge of bankruptey, taxation was? It seems to me, unless my acquaintance, for I see be said that figures have gone wrong somewhere, no pesemist he ever met was endow raw sill has increased considerably, and unemployment was greater thera
It is reported that the price of had nearly reached breaking poin as to contemplate a little the appear and deniers of it have justice on their
that the Government is surreptitions-ed with anything that seemed to The silk of finest quality is estimated than in almost any part of the Empire. ance, complexion, carriage and de-side, if we are to judge by most that
ly, without a vote, increasing their encourage him to look upwards and to be over $1,300 per pioul. The If they all joined forces what better meanour of a man who with exceed appears in print, which is rather to
pay by that arrangement.
mjoy the heights. I call myself reason is the scarcity of silk obtain-Government could they have? He ingly great earnestness embarks upon weep over. Now the world is so full the task of thinking, pondering, of bad men and fools, which is the
(Theerful Pessimist, and I can assureable from Sai-Chiu as a result of the urged them to vote Coalition and put I'm afraid after all that the speaker that I often get a stiff unfavourable weather this year, be their country first. weighing ruminating, reflecting, con: same as to say unhappy people, and
AFOLOGIES, you must get short mea-nok from enjoyment. I have even sides the mulberry leaves being dea- sidering, cogitating, and in such wisel.there are so many legitimate opportu
sure this week. I realize aniped into the lamppost of reality" trayed by worms: Since the European know his views on Home Rule and preparing to write down upon fair nities for crying and bewailing and
that this is not very amusing, any he talked of, and it neatly drove my War, all factories have resumed whether he was in favour of an inceme Mr. Simpson's hecklers wanted to He'll note bis invite, and, then way. But if your dose was ruddig pipe shark through the roof of operations and the result is that there tax in Hongkong. On the former paper the resultant thoughts of the mourning and being solemnly sad or ame. Is there not a circumflex sadly solemn, that it is a little towards
like bide is dow, dab you, you wud- dut do half, as butch work, as Ibe my mouth A most discomforting is great demand. Cainta Timce subject he said he thought Ireland. accent above his nose, and a visible the evening of the scales to write as it
tryig to do....
adventure. Now if the gentleman congestion of the veins in his fore-wore a deliberate bid for laughter, and
will permit me to oross foils with him, To enable the inmates of the head? Is not this congestion due to pantagruelize whatsoever and
Thisis the nuance of preach. I will-gardez vous, son-plait say blind Home, Kowloon, and also the to the attraction of concentration, wheresoever it is unlikely that amend
THIS ing to anked congrega- that I never met an optimist who inmates of the Pokfulam Foundling wherely every ventricle, scat, tunnel, meut can come, hence adveraria, of
JOB. tions, which I trust for the enjoyed more than we pessimista do. Home, to have a Christmas party and receptacle, tubicle, and cellule is filled which I as an interested party am
aske of their peace of mind In the language of a hymn I heard Christmas gifts, Madame Lottie with a stream through all the pipes, expected to leave you to speak, dumb tunnels, and conduits whatsoever that dogs that you are. Let us agree that
feel. They scatter their good seed on possibly in a church, they look at concert in the City Hall early in Dec my brethren of the Cloth may never somewhere in one of my past lives, Gordon will gave a special afternoon do feed and nourish the thing he is the first to lose his temper is the one
fruitful ground, and so one kind of heaven and long to enter in. We ember. Owing to Madame Gordon supposed to think with? Does not that is in the wrong, and damn the
seed suffices them. I need a sample pessimista, philosophical pessimists, having preliminary arrangements in such a situation persuade you that one that sulks. Is that fair? So, my
Look here, I know as of everything in the seed merchant's enter in and look and enjoy, and hand for the annal concert in Jan- he is as it were beside himself and hearties, we understand each other
HEADACHES well as you do that stock. Forsaking metaphor, there are waste no time in vain longings. More uary next in aid of these institutions bond, entranced, absent, blind as Let us now look around for something
those lines are not in my lectience (a word I coined a over, your optimist is not a stayer she has decided to make the tickets cliffa impressed magnifi to all save that he would at which to laugh.
poetry. Not nearly week or two ago, you may remember) If he sees I know that almost any of those hearty and level-headed elbow liftom field in front, he quite and A very fine programme will be
too much of only $1 each for the gift fund concert undergoing.improveme zed, as the image
What, my hearties, Swastika fellows could write bottes whom it is as easy as it is pleasant sulks. We pessimists stay with it be-sented including excerpts from Italian British Borneo Tim THE LEGION Can we find more ones. If given time. But I am to talk to, for they guess what I cause there is really nothing clis to and French opers.
pre-ing traffic witnesse laughable than the writing against time, cometing by a would to at, and in any event take do, and we have the joy of the gallop, strafe we have had fire, very weak, and with the most the will for the deed. These delight even while we know the course is an the week among men who frightful headaches. Decidedly Job ful fellows know well that all the oval, and that the Judge's Box is an British Legion, had nothing on me, for I have no controversy of las arest con-empty dummy, and the knacker's not be, desire to curse the day I was born, or troverais! week matters ng more in yard the surest thing Spurs are the jolly days I've had in between, the end than my present troubles painful and bits uncomfortable, but if I'm to have much more of do... Whoever is right, whoever oats are good, and there is joy in s
of Chamberlain' Pain Balm. It is just traction of my mental wrong, the truth. If truth there be,bran-mash, and grass in sweet, and gaine, soreness disappeare like tho thing rin rub down after a med uit. Happy must come to light at last, and the way! did you see that pretty filly aid and sprains and wollings
a right ones and the wrong ones will by cantor by! Just compare the deny other treatment. For sale
sured in, bae third long time, then en be such an inextricable heap of meanour of your optimilat when he chemists and Storekeepers?
no other?
STRAFE.
1
"The rank is but the guines
stamp.
The Man's the gold." In evening dress the hero may Look nicer than he did that
day
When dirty, he did fight a lamp That lit the world;
But it Tuxedos do not match hie
pay
turn away,
As one that's sold. This comradeship they prate of
hardly may Exist with compulsory glad array It is too cold.
Do not his democratic leaning
cramp
The Dinner Jacket's but a fancy
stamp The man's the gold.
WITH IT.
PESSIMIST,
my
A FAVOURITE RUB DOWN.
the
golfer, the football player and
all round athlete know the value
integral part of the Empire and he should have Home Rule but remain an was emphatically against the in- position of an income tax.
After both candidates had been proposed and seconded a ballot wr being elected by 34 votes to 16. taken which resulted in Mr. Br
#
"Docks gaily decora
af North- ent harbour
sawmill erected to wide demand Br Kathering int Northolifte barous prar congratu quet er
at deal increas
inauguration
Jer Company great det increased worl4- Amon splendid timbers rior, natives informed ead hunting for bar icernonexistentnowadays. Ad Governor evening ban cellent state town happiates
•.!! This in the message Renter's Correspondent fogedphod Lord-Northcliffe thaty port, phior to combing to