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4.
Para 5 uses the words "by convention" twice. It should be replaced by "in practice" preferably in both places, but we could live with "by convention" in relation to the Governor's exercise of his powers in Hong Kong.
5.
Paras 9 and 13 refer to official members of EXCO and LEGCO as "secretaries" in charge of major departments. Does this technically include the Attorney-General?
Para 17 VIII A line 4: "senior unofficials" should I think be "senior officials".
6.
7.
Para 17 VIII C line 2 "present" should I think be "president".
Para 21 "there will be a deliberate shift" : perhaps, but is this Government policy or what?
8.
PART II
9.
"autonomy" appears in line 11 of para 1. I think we can live with the word "autonomy" here in view of the somewhat teleological aspect of this paragraph and particularly para 3 (2) of the Joint Declaration. But I wonder whether para 2 is not too limited. At present Hong Kong's powers in relation to banking and bank notes are subject to the requirement to reserve bills.
in Clause XXVI of the Royal Instructions and existing provisions relating to Judges of the Supreme Court are set out in the Letters Patent. (On a point of the most excruciating detail, if the quotation in para 1 (iv) is taken from Part X of Annex 1, I think the word "the" should be inserted before the word "appropriate". It does make a difference).
In para 7, the word "allowing" in line 2 is slightly strange. "Making" would be more appropriate.
10.
11.
I found the reference to entrenching the powers of the legislature in the last line of para 7 a somewhat expansive description of the bill, but the description is that of others and not the authors of the paper.
12.
In paras 10 et seq there is an implicit parallel between the Executive Council and "an executive" or executive authorities.
I am not sure that the Joint Declaration justifies this. EXCO, at present, is an advisory body.
The executive authorities at present in Hong Kong are the Governor, the Secretaries and their subordinates. It may well be politic to try to draw a parallelism, but I wonder whether the issue of what the Chinese might envisage by executive authorities should not be further explored.
PART III
13.
My only comment on this Part is the purely editorial one that the reference to (c) or (d) in line 9 of para 23 should presumably be
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/a