CONFIDENTIAL
Mr. Gaminara
Mr. Laird
Reference. HK 22/5
SECRETARY OF STATE'S SPEECH IN HONG KONG ON 14 FEBRUARY
Hong Kong Tel No 30
I attach a consolidated list of comments from other
Departments on the draft speech as contained in Hong
Kong Tel No. 30. I have incorporated with one
exception all the specific amendments onto the
attached copy of the telegram.
The one amendment I have not made concerns the
point made by Economists Dept. about the term "this
city" instead of "this colony". I am sure the
Governor is aware of the distinction mentioned by
Mr. Wooller (his minute of 19 Jan. attached): but he
is probably deliberately refraining from using the
word colony. I assume he is using the term "city" to
cover the whole of urban Hong Kong.
Most Departments made the point that the tone of
paragraph 1 needs altering. It is difficult to
redraft this paragraph in any way that it is not
equally patronising or pompous. One way around it
would be to put the whole speech in a different order.
I think paragraph 11 would make quite a good
beginning (with a suitably recast paragraph 1 as
an introduction), followed by paras 12 and 13 then
paras. 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10 and finally 14.
Pir. Kelly
P. M. Kelly (Miss)
20th January 1972.
DD 896639 140609 500M 7/71 GM 3643/2
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.my attached redraft
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