1950-03-04 — Page 4

4

Do you drink? It was fixed before birth

By CHAPMAN PINCHER

Weltaller, moderate

17HETHER you will be a

drinker or chronle toper decided before you are born, according to a new medical theory.

The port of company you keep merely determines when you will start drinking.

Tho theory, put forward by Texas University scientists, days who craves int

person alcohol has a deficiency in his diet, because he needs a more- 1han-ordinary amount of some ingredient.

And the excessive need for this Ingredient is the result of physical fault present

EL

birth and probably inherited.

HAIR OF THE...

at

The scientists offered mámals which had never tasted alcohol

water

alcohol.

n choice of plain

water

mixed with

They report in the lance:-

"Some of te

ог

animals up-

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, SATURDAY, MARCH 4, 1950.

peared

bc

"The Committee feel that if you can make our candidato bear a slight resemblance to St. George-to much the bottor."

constitutionally to

feetotallers, other moderate, steady drinkers, ollers spas- indie drinkers, others drinkers with aunting appetites,

other drinker

with

10-

latively strong appetile even at the start,"

Then

the

scientists found

that by tering the animals

dels-adding excessive gangli- the of vitamins and other in- could stviteli gredients they

The drinking habits.

Ол some diets all the ammals

soak d themselves

in drink.

alf "went Dat

Ou others they

the wagon."

to cure

chrane

Lotuion Express Servien

MEET Scotland Yard's

7OU'VE heard of Scot-

land Yard's

Flying

Squad but now meet

The selentils are now trying the Frand Squad. Everyone

treatment.

alcoholics

--(Lendor Express Service)

POCKET CARTOCK

-from America

by OSBERT LANCASTER

So theyre di terrm perta musical and water kapano

that maube Juntr'il get a zob

a distorted. 2

TA

ינן

Meer here in att set an uning

singing commercial'

WOMEN

FIVE

F-men

big-salaried posta

from the

per

by Mark Priestley

WITH

BERNARD. WICKSTEED IN

DARKEST AFRICA DESPATCH No. 2...

The Lolta illa, Kenya.

DON'T know what the accountants will say when they see my expenses for this trip, but one of the items will be: "To buying a cow...£5."

It wasn't a very good cow, but I needed it to pay my witch doctor's bl

Ho's rather a superior witch doctor for laibon, an they'ro called in theAc parts), and he's the rector of a witch doctors' medical school in the Masaj native reserve,

I happened to say to somebody in Nairobi that I'd like to meet a real

there was a whole fnculty of them 8,000 feet up in the hills at Loita.

Wicksteed and friend

medicine man, and he said brought ahead by the driver that isation side of their profession. Bwana Beaverbrook, friend of They Inve the sliding scale up a reporter and a row. Dwann Churchill, was sending system of fees and charge ne- cording to the patient's means. The really poor pay nothing at all."

wilch doctor is a

They don't specialize. Every quite normal to call in a second but it is G.P., opinion. They are middlemen between the Creator and the

So here we are above the clouds in a lost world that might have come out of Rider Haggard.

In the Marat medical profes- rion they don't ask for fees in advance. It's a case of "No cure, no cow." so we left ours to graze and gathered round in a circle.

The situation

To reach it you drive for more than a hundred miles over the dusty plains lying immediately south of the equator. Then you lows: climb into the sky up a series of brlek-red gorges that are the home of baboons and leopards.

Suddenly you come out at the top and spread before you are the rolling green downs of England. You might be in Sus- sex or Wiltshire,

A dozen varieties of little flowers grow in the turf like buttercups, dalsies, and hare- bells, and the hills are doited with bushes that look something like blackthorn or may.

In these su-English surround- ings it's add to find that the animals grazing by the track are antelopes, zebras, and gnus.

Bone rattling

The faculty at Lolla was founded about a hundred years

was explained

Your fame as medicine

1

to the panel something as fol- patient, they say, and in diflcult

cases one middleman enough,

I've

just

paid

isn't

+

Each patient has his own re- gistered medical map, just as wo have now, but he's at flerty to change to another if the first doctor gives him permission.

If he swaps without getting this-the Masal equivalent of Alling in the right forms-he's Hinble to find himself bewitched. Cases of unprofessional con- punished by the (Masai General Council) but

wouldn't Lett Us what conduct they considered unpro-

arc

duet M.G.M.G.

Metical

my witch doctor

*

they

It certainly isn't drunkenness

bc- cause getting fiddly 011 beer made from hopey is often a prelude to dim- cult diagnosis. men has spread to Britain, and "And"it" isnt getting "familiar- this man here, Bwana Bwernard with your female patients. It is wicktred, having failed to get more likely that you'd be con- his rheumatism cured under the sidered unprofessional if you White Man's National Health didn't. Scheme, has come to you with this magnificent cow to ask for your advice."

thors of the CIP-the Criminal Avestigation De-

Jewel frauds on insur his victims. He spent heavily partment-but few people cars is James Samuel Hunt, stolen

sperialised In swindle ance companies. It chares

to obtain new have heard of the CFD-the who

embezzlers round large graft payments

cars, making BOUT 40 hereditary witch erants who faked their own grand-seale Frauds Depart export drive, forming a series Company

on the globe, cloned

doctors live in this African an hic idle. The

The news went round Shangri-La, but not all of them ants emuggling rocket and that Hunt was In four years this iment.

of companies to swindle clients has stoppered

the man who are in practice. Successful witch scores of funk comparatively newly-fortned in Canada, Australia and else money escape routes from the get a new car and near- doctoring depends a much on braich-of-London's police whore.

Is C200.000 was placed-in-de-peychology and knowledge of They've elimited sterling" ayen,

with him. Most of the human nature that you are not 1Q has trapped over 10,000 the advertise-and-vanish rogue

Amid bl-time melets, the tars were never delivered.

allowed to ralle the boner or crooks and protected poten- who offered

take fees till you reach middle fial victims in every part of to veterans an area supervisors Fraud Squad handled the patient

that led to the Coping each day with major are Until then you have the applicant-since investigations The British Commonwealth, and required

minor KYD Lynskey

Tribunal ant be handling large notorious

the men status of an undergrachate or a they would

they checked have ceared to be surprised at witch doctor's heir apparent. recently, rams of money on his behalf-to More

of hunan Britain little-known

the activities of a "city"

eredulity. The old te depasit cash with him as secu tions!

anti-fraud squad was rily.

trick duped They've, winkled out the prominent traders who bought Spanith Prisoner formed in March 1916-as the lick business-borrowers

who, hire quantities

of surplus nur grandparents, and variants spearhead of all-out drive offering to y fantastic in metal

Ministry of are still coming up in the i loans to start Supply and cheated Britain of Fraud Squa & giet zerond-floor | found sitting on top of a hill could see at once against hare-pushing specula- teres

terest rates tors, phony bines swindler net

pounds by pay others at Scotland Yard. altempted to thousands of new enterprises,

Wit- independent and big thanein frauds. Since try an old fraud on Colonial in- Ang

traders As ness the

01 10 bid of Maria Saunders, alias Baro- perverted Ingenuity then it has spread its net wider vestors. They paid the Interest much an £2,000 Ho catch con-men and sharp- for a month or two before dis- against them.

ness Simenik, whom the Czechs found guilty some time ago of isters of every grade.

fenud and false obtaining 3,000,000 Arrents for

have pretencca

mounted by fraud from an American.

crowns, by business brokers, the gang of These are, merely small fry, hourly 40 percent, In the cur- Since its inception, the Squad dent statistical year, the F-men

in everything secured 2,954 convictions. The his heels in han, Intervened. He is cooling

currency racketeering to fact remains that the Fraud gaol. In gol far the next four from

Squad is actually n fighting force of only 150 detectives, mill slightly below strength.

When the Home Office first Look Chief Detective Super- intendent Arthur Thorp off or- dinary detective duties to

They've rounded up the typ

MINUTES

EACH

appearing.

WEEKEND

WITH THE ɑrisest d wittiest MEN

DISRAELI

FEMININE vanity: That divine gift which makes women charming.

of woman on THE ACTION our destiny is unceasing.

morlication, THERE IS NO however kern, nu mitery, how- ever desperat, which the spirit of woman cannot in some degree lighten or alleviate.

WOMEN are generous, but not precise in money matters.

BENJAMIN DISRAELU Earl ol Beaconsfield (1801-1881), slates- 01 and nuvelist, master of

epigram and brillant delater, was prodigal of wit and wisdom.

The examples given helms

shole! ant be taken as invari ably expre-letgibi own opinion.

Though NOR20* are frum Li

maus

•hers hers,

ire frost hás nove's and are the remarks of att characters.

L Pien 2nd tits, fie MIN jable af contradicling lumis

ti wa wanable als of titiang tments lea better than Samal te larm themselve

work was

The 'Baroness'

PRAGUE newspaper publish. ed a report of the trial with a photograph of her. Showing this newspaper to wardrobe dealer in London, the 'Baroness' pointed to the figure

plained

a woman

by a witch doctor who came down from heaven and was

He was so small that the Mazai and took him home. herdsmen thought he was a child

The old boys didn't believe a word of it. They weren't sure what we were getting at, but you

was some kind of gas.

Surgery

man

YOUR

True medielne won't touch surgery. That's a mere artisan's job. Even a white man can be a surgeon. In- deed, these days the witch doc- they knew it tors send surgical cases to the European hospital without much question. Without even bothering to In the old days, though, the

with the confer

olhers, the Masal surgeons would amputate Imagine their surprise when, dean, or head of the faculty, gave a limb, or remove a fractured rib they got him back and found this reply: "We can cure rhcu- and put on one from a sheep in that he wasn't a youngster at all matian among our own people, its pince. but a teeny weeny witch doctor. but we have never tried our Their

He married several of the local methods on a white man. girts, and all his male descen- dants have been witch doctors ever since.

up

principal disinfectant was melted sheep's fat, and they the wounds with Sewed "If the Bwaun with the sinews from the back of an ox. stinking-pipe has sufficient faith Until the wounds were healed to live with us for a few weeks the patient lived on nothing but we might help him. Otherwine roast beef. My rheumatism

our advice to him is to go to the

This was all very interesting, but it wasn't the top secret stuff of 3,000,000 crowns and ex- A the best bedside manner in

DOZEN of them dressed in Nairobi Government Hospital,"

The District Officer who had I wanted. Even the promise of that was the sam | Army blankets were wailing for brought me up to Lojta said they Bwana Beaverbrook's cow, now recruit the Sund, much of the placed on her head by the us under a tree when our lorry thought we were trying to break ground, wouldn't Induce them to

were being cages because they to new that he had Czech Communists.

Grazing peacefully in the back- A fortune bumped to to hold special police classes.in was standing

stop. Besides

down their code. to her credit, blankets they wore sandals made and recountancy, she

Live that. company law

explained, in the

"Onc Czech of motor tyres, and Instead of

of their sidelines 1 Arthur Thorp once worked in banks

Ihat the cow brought nearer Jo London office, enlisted in the

carrying little block bags they giving charme to callie-thieves and asked what they did when showed out-

stowed their equipment in holes he said, "If once we knew what they needed rain. "Why," said police at 18 and

Naturally. Pability

her well-to-do In

those charms were we'd know the dean, "we do the same pierced through their cars, financial tanding

sympathiser could not read the

that y man found investigating the Harris fire Czech letter-press. She parted

carrying, "you. We pray for I." Today he knows with £6,500

There's no bush telegraph to them was out on a cattle raid." Go on, give him the cow, com-raising care.

before she had Loita, but a bus runs once a The panel were les reticent Barac that there's still no fraud too the news report transtated and week and old or too preposterous le prove went to the police.

word

been when asked about the

pay-off.

IT DESTROYS one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.

wife

AN OBEDIENT mands her husband.

APHORISMS

APOLOGIES only nccount for that which they do not alter,

MAN is not the creature of cir- emmstances, circumstances the creatures of men.

are

1

Sold Aerodrome Squad acts with amazing speed.

[THE

tas

NOTHING depresses a man's Angla, complete with buildings within a few hours. discovered

than a

and African

Once the necessary clues of fraud reach its ears, the Fraud When Sir John Corbin Chubb

Kaoled for obtaining HERE'S the ease of the gang Wah

£1,400 ear by false pretences, of confidence men who sold a

the presions judge derelict RAF nerodrome in East Vic

mentioned that the fraud was

Walter spirits more completely

equipament, to a South

Herbert Brackley used to read relf-conviction of self-conceit.

business company DESPAIR is the conclusion of The victims were driven round obituary notices as part of

the aerodrome

for Inols.

robbing: and offered it plan

elderly ଦ TILE

restored to

complete working with a he became acquainted order for £250,000.

with a widow, telephoned her they agreed, and paid over a to make an appointment and IGNORANCE never settles large deposit on account. It found two detective-sergeants question.

later that they be waiting. PATIENCE is a necessary in-Way only

came suspicious and found that gredient of genius.

the aerodrome still belonged to In the SUCCESS Theto- SOPHISTICATED

the British Government. riclan Inebrinted with the audacity.

time ITE WHO going exuberance of his own verbosity.

The reference is to Gladstone.) everything.

IT SEEMS

a barren to me

art ENTERPRISING

FEW great men have flourished who, were they randid, would not acknowledge the vast advan- tages they have experienced in thi this Conservatism-an often fortunate. the earlier years of their career unhappy crossbreed, the mule of from the spirit and sympathy of politics that engenders nothing.

women.

A FEMALE friend, amiable, clever, and devoted, is a posses- sion more valuable than parks and palaces.

LOVE

A

PHRASES

LOVE Is the May-day of the

THE GONDOLA of London-a heart.

hansom cab. THE MAGIC of first love in

CAREER of plundering and the gnorance that it can ever blundering. end.

THE SWEET simplicity of

child of

gains

THE UNFORTUNATE always egotistical.

LITERATURE

In a le book, he carried were the names of 15 other widows, Pleading guilty to In this instance, the South fraud amounting to £2,000 he Africans refused io praecute asked for even other casez to

the dossier had to be be considered. closed. Fortunately, several of the con-men were hauled in subsequently on other charges.

are and

BOOKS are fatal; they are the

Then, last year, there was the continuous-credit

THE STILL hissing bacon and curse of the human race. Nine-spectacular

INSTEAD of love being the Tree Per Cents, occasion of all the misery of this

Following Up

world, 0 13 sung by fantanile Cras that looloed like tufts of tenths of existing books are non-trick of Oddessa-born Abc Bar- he followed If necessary through

bards. I believe that the misery prinroses,

IIIS CHRISTIANITY

of

this world is occasioned by

muscular.

LIFE

wan

there not being love enough.

THAT FATAL drollery called LOVE at first sight is often a

sentiment, representative government, genial and Benuino but first love at first sight is ever eventually branded as spurious. WHERE we do not respect, we where we soon coase lo love; cease to love, virtue weeps and flies.

POLITICS

.

are

YOUTHI is a blunder; Manhood a struggle; Old Age a regret.

THE BLUNDERS of youth are preferable to the triumphs of manhood or the successes of old

the age. distribution of

POLITICS REAL possession and

his own account.

ob-

At the same time, the Squad watches and quietly follows up every enticing advertisement offering

for Invest- ment of

employ-

Major And Minor ment Plenty of advertisers

NCE the F-men commence on investigation, a clue will

nell Kritz who actually ob- hundreds of complicated docu- sense, and the clever books are 10

ments tained £72,000 by fake pre-

and company reports. the refutalica of that nonsense.

one of Britain's the latter often cooked by ex- tences from YOU KNOW who crities are?

his

Bank accounts are Beris leading banks. Kritz began The men who have failed in

career in this country with tained on subpoena, cheque iterature and art.

a flat-tron and an Ironing board transactions exhaustively probed, the movements of banknotea AN AUTHOR who speaks in an East End shop, hiring nhout his own books in almost as out evening gowns at 10 shill bank accounts.

traced through thousands of bad as a mother who talks about|ings a night. Ultimately the her own children.

staggering sum of £1,000,000 WORDSWORTH-gentlemanly was passing through his bank man, but only reads poctry,

TABLE TALK

"RENSIBLE ren are all of the

offer genuine propositions with ADVENTURES fre fo the

same rellport"—"And pray,

nothing to hide. But the F- adventurous.

what is that?"" Sensible men} RITZ persuaded five people men take no chances.

to allow him the unlimited answer the ads and set quiet enjoyment.

RATHER ülke bad wine; one I TO BE CONSCIOUS that you so soon gets bored

with good use of their bank accounts and Inquiries afoot to make sure THE POWER of the future is

presented their cheques at his nothing is wrong. are Ignorant is a great step to wine.

Taking advantage Ministerial capacity.

WITH WORDS Wo govern knowledge.

As a result they have almost WE ALL of us live too much Bores bave succeeded dragons.

THE AGE: of chivalry is past. own bank.

of the usual three-day delay in-

he drow out the closed down the suckerballs

out the be in a circle.

MY IDEA of an agreeable clearance,

out by bogus NO GOVERNMENT

into the various put

persons. person is a person who agreer money, pald

the

Fee-snatchers · who cheques, long secure without a formidable

Accounts to mbet

more cheques apprenticeships, bogus Opposition.

A VISIT to a country house is then presented

school sharks, of meals mulgated by from his dupes and paid out respondence a series

Agencies more money till the accounts fake film audition the new dresses of the lodies,

hate mowballed to fantastic dimen- alt there and a hundred similar HOW those rooks bore!

rackets previously operated on THE CHARACTER of a wo claying with ancient families; slons.

nn Empire-wits baris, but rapidly develops after you are always cawed to denth.

THEY BAY primroses make an such a scale that he spent now largely belon the post, £00.000 from his own pocket thanks to the brillant work marriage, and sometimes Beems

In fact it is capital_zalad.

In order to Juro £200,000 from of the fraud cops. to change, when only complete.

power.

IN POLITICS nothing is con- temptible.

men

con

of

THE WORLD is weary statesmen whom democracy has degraded into politicians.

VARIETY is the mother of never tell."

MARRIAGE

I HAVE always thought that every woman should marry, and

ENGLAND does not love coall- no man.

tions.

PARTY is organised opinion. A BOUND Conservative Gov. ernment. I understand: Tory men and Whig measures.

מחמד

with me.

London Express Service

They

offer dud

COT-

VUE-FOCUS

EXCLUSIVE ON THE BUSCH PED

mt égant, a slegte vinden, Aik

had

organ-

-London Express Service

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