1948-11-10 — Page 4

QUEEN'S & ALHAMBRA

SHOWING TO-DAY at 2.30, 5.15, 7.15 & 9.15 K.M.

Johnny WEISSMULLER

Maureens

OʻSULLIVAN

Jy

TARZAN

MATE

AN M-G-M PICTURE

AND HIS

NEXT CHANGE

• Sunniest, funniest vexation of your life...hit the Road to fi

For the s

CROSBY

BOB

HOPE LAMOUR

HEWEST, HESTIES: "HOJAS" SHOW OF -13 ALL!

TO RIO

BAKER PARAMOUNT'S"

Gators

SANTOSWT A FOWWCK?

TERMICO

"Apostate, Fa" e Danzel Dart - me Morman Z. Mcleod

"T"

GALE SONDERGAARD

FRANK FAYLEN

THE WERE BROTHERS

THE

ANDREWS

SISTERS

ORIENTAL

AIR CONDITIONED

TAKE ANY EASTERN TRAM CAR OR HAPPY VALLEY BUS

SHOWING TJ-DAY: 2.30-5.15-7.20 G 20 P.M.

A WONDERFUL ROMANTIC COMEDY WITH LOVE AND FUN!

"You're the most mixed-up

damal over-moti

COLUŃBIA, PICTLINES gerakanta :

› Glenn FORD Evelyn KEYES The Mating of Millie

RON HANJELI - WILLARD PARKER

Scrvorady by Lavetta tisťanéve and 31. The Metalerey Diracled by HERRY LEVIK • A CASEY ROBINSON PRODUCTION

NEXT CHANGE;

SHOWING

TO-DAY

THIS LOVE

IS

CURSED!

“UNCONQUERED".

Cathay

WANGHAI ROAD, WANGHAI

20.

Patti (238

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 1948.

7264

"There you are, Fred-I told you all this eclebration's got nothing to do with the opening of the Dairy Show,"

Sitting on the

·OULD you like to give

me a penny for my thoughts?" asked the, Sparrow's wife as she bent her beak over her tiny bit of knit- ting.

"Not when I'm going to have them for nothing whether I like it イナ not," said the Sparrow, alghing with the sheer boredom of her presence.

"I was thinking," said his wife," what are you going to do it another war breaks out?"

"Dive down a coal mine and atoy. there," said the Sparrow.

"You can't live in a coal mine," sald his wife.

of

"You'd have a better chance Hoing down there than up here."

"What I meant was what are you going to do for the country?"

"The same as I did last time," sold the Sparrow.

"Whatever was that?"

"Are you telling me that you have forgotten my contribution to victory over the Hitlerite hordes of bar- barians?" said the Sparrow. "Can gratitude be so short-itved?"

"I can't remember anything to be grateful for," said his wife. "You didn't join the wardens or anything like that."

"If you will throw what you call a mind back to the years 1940-45," said the Sparrow, "you will remem- ber that I was a reserve fire-watcher

The Tree Tops Club."

"That was a nico sort of effort."

at

"Good."

Fence

by NATHANIEL

"So that it

GUBBINS

won't slip down and leave von exposed.",

"Thanks."

1

"With these body belts you ought. to have much happier winter.""

"Splendid."

O!

3+

course, the usual polsons will be coming down."

"Naturally."

"There will be errors of diet and some indulgences."

"Quite

"Um?"

"And Christmas."

#t

01

"No, thanks."

"Rather go to sleep again?" "Please."

"O.K., liver."

"Good night."

"But it's early morning." "Never mind, Good night. "Good night."

Party conversation

"WHEN we've

our

any

spent all capital there won't be more parties excent for distinguish- ed visitors at the Foreign Office."

"Margaret's father says that when yes, Christmas."

recovery "You have

they talk about national -rotten time

and the hardships endured by the Christmas, don't you?"

British people without complaint "Mustn't prumble."

whisky remember what they never mention the suppose you Aristotle said about blie?"

drinkers who pay twice as much "Who?"

for Inferior liquor despite income tox and capital deprecintlon."

111)

"Aristotle. He believed that excess of bile in the liver was the cause of bad temper, Haven't you read Aristolie?"

"I can't read in the dark,”

arms

REDS' DEFEAT IN BALKAN 'HOT CORNER

By NORMAN MONTELLIER

TRIESTE.

COMMUNIST Power 14. buket. West frontier

time "hot corner" of the East-West frontier in Europe, Allied military Government officials: belleve.

Trieste is more like just another senport town now than the strife ridden city which made headlines during the turbulent period from 1945 until early 1948.

AMG officials are sind to have it that” awny. "We are quite satisfied that what once was one of Europe's toughest, most uncontrollable Communist par- ties now look like the weakest one in Europe," they said,

Time has done it. AMG officinis said the Talin election defeat of Communism) the church's all-out anti- Communist campaign and the Tilo-Cominform artu- ment has so divided the Trieste Communists on nailon- alistic Issues that no faction of the party has enough strength any longer.

"We do not have any fears for the future from local Communists," one AMG man sali. "The Communist organisation Is a shadow of its former self."

Leenuse evil thoughts always distort

the features.

Triesle's mixed population of Slavs and Italians, were bound to start trouble when the Free State of Trieste was first proposed. Sides were drawn either for Yugoslavin or for Italy. There was no popular support for the tree territory, Idea, now repudlated by. Anglo-American government leaders as well.

But while nationalism was the first instinct. Communist leaders "When I think of Monty I always quicitly moved in to weld the anti- say to myself: Here is one of the free state population into n. powerful Communist party, concentrating on greatest soldiers of our time, and the fighting the Anglo-American

grateful cupation polley in the zone nd~

eir ministered by AMG.

highest

п- compliment

people can offer la

dogs after him","

пате their

Russian

"Have you noticed that generals are beginning to look like German generals?"

"

niways

thought English bishops looked like German generals."

fact "Margaret's father says the that the British go on drinking the whisky despite *everything Government can do against it is not only an example of the highest form of democracy, but an illustration of freedom- the grit of a proud and loving people."

"My husband says he can never see why Conservatives attack Con- munisis when they have one main destruction object in common-the. of Socialism."

"In 13 or 20 years' time we shall he the finest physical, specimens in the world because this is the only country, apart from the Dominions, where all the babies are, being properly ted."

80,000 Members

oc-

AMG spokesmen said tho. Com- munist organisation grew to around 80,000 members at its peak. Parades and demonstrations, which were fre- quent, always drew up to 30,000: persons. Riots were common and”? AMG's job of trying to keep order in its zone of the free state was u dimcult one.

The free state came into being with the signing of the peace treaty. The Yugosiny military took over control of the southern part of the state. The rest, including Trieste city and harbour, was run by AMG with 3,000 American and

5,000 British soldiers.

The Communists concentrated on up trouble in the local surring shipyards, accusing AMG of violat- ing civil liberties, charging- 'dis- crimination against Slave and the harbourisg of known Fascist crimi. nals. The Communists campaigned for The Russians are such mechani-nication" of the fren state, back- toward cal idiots that when they do manage ing up Yugoslav gestures to lumber along with on atomic the same goal, on Yugoslav terms, bomb they'll probably blow "them- selves to bits.'

"That, of course, is nothing but wishful thinking."

The Last Straw

AMG plugged ahead with ile in- dependent polley. The standard of lving rose steadily until Trieste Anglo- city and the rest of the

was in a remark-

American zone

"My husband says they're like the like Japanese. They've never been able and to do more than steal other people's the ideas, including Marxism.'

Making a speech absut whisky at ably good condition compared with Civilians a distillers' lunch, Margaret's father the hungry. Yugoslav one.

voles in said that despite shortage and taxa-were given more and more tion we shall drink it in the homes, the zone's administration, and the inthe taverns, In the hotels, and Communists were checked in every even in the streets and On the effort to get control of key positions. beaches. We shall never

aurren- der."

"They say Stalin's exacly an ape with short, thick body "Of course, not. Sorry, Bul, con-

almost reaching to sidering what Aristotle said, and all

ground." that Christmas drinking and bile and

་་༔

he only

could war everything. I think you're prefly

sporting the

with glamorous Ana Pauker what way you deal -things-without-losing-your-temper,derful children they'd have..

"Don't mention it."

"My husband says that although "Shall I send down some liver Russians are notoriously plain, salts to wake you up?"

Communism makes them look worse

"It was the nicest I could think of" said the Sparrow. "I was also

in the black market."

"And sili are," said his wife. "You're telling 'me,” said the Spar-

TOW.

of

"You ought to be ashamed yourself when you think of thal nice Mr. Robin, back in the wardens already, learning new ARP never touching a thing off the ration. He's quite worn out with work and worry."

and

brains

"He ought to have his examined," said the Sparrow,

"His brains are all right," said At 2.30, 5.20,

his wife, “and his heart's in the right He'll be ready to fight place, too. 7.30 & 9.30 p.m. the Communist menace whenever

it comes,"

PEGGY CUMMINS

VICTOR MATURE ETHEL BARRYMORE

MOSS ROSE

VINCENT PRIET

Dieving in GILESORT KAIDEES PIGORK IN DENK MARKET

NEXT CHANGE Joan BENNETT

Robert RYAN in

"THE WOMAN ON THE BEACH”

TO-DAY

ONLY

Linda

MAJESTIC

POPULAR REQUEST! Cornet Richard

DARNELLA-WILDE,

· GREENE

2.15. 4.45, 7.15

& 9.45 P.M.

George SANDERS

FOREVER AMBER

CO-MORROW

Acadamy Award. Finner

TECHNICOLOR

RONALD COLMAN

“A DOUBLE LIFE"

marry

won-

What The Englishman Laughs At

vaudeville they used to say: "He

who laugh Inst—is English."

But the British know that old By "ROBERT. MUSEL clicho about their alleged lack of a sense of humour Isn't true. They lough as often and with the wome response as others. Only they don't always laugh at the same things.

Recently Ď British poll WIS taken on who laughed at what and when.

It showed that the British city "And so shall I said the Spar. dweller is more apt to laugh at

Jokes about war and current af row, preparing to leave.”

the countryman gut- "Where are you going?" asked his fairs, while wife, a tear starting in her eye. "To faws mainly at domestle humour.

Peoplo that awful Tree Tops Club?"

over 40 laugh more at "There are new methods of fire-religion and drunkenness and dialect watching to be learned," said the stories. Younger people seem to go

stortes. "shaggy dog" All the above refers to printable jokes. Both sexes and

all ages amirked at the other giggled and kind and the poll takers reported that 4,000 of the 10,000 jokes they analysed couldn't be printed in form.

Sparrow as he flew away, mustn't be late on parade,"

Dialling LIV

"HULLO

Is that my liver?" Um-m-m?"-

"Is that my liver?"

"Your liver speaking." iftfare you asleep?" "Of course."

"On"

for

any

that

cam-

"I can enjoy no joke but ono Kibw and funny," nhousewife told the poll-inkers. This bination pleases mo Immensely. Otherwise my life-la pure and sim- ple.".

* Four Years azo ·

same poll "Well, I've got D now kind of asked the same questions on hu- body belt for your protection. With mour and decided that this was the straps.'

favourite British : joke;

"I have, some news for you. You know how you hate the cast wind?"

"Yes."

Having ordered a plato of cab- bage a restaurant customer plas- tered it over his head. "What are you doing with that cabbage?" demanded the proprietor. "Is that cabbage?" said the customer. "I thought it was spinach." The same joke has reappeared in many forms in this year's poll. Here's one of the variations:

A man enters a pub, orders a 'beer, drains it and walks straight up the wall, across the celling, down the other side and out of the door. "That's odd," said an- **" other man at the bar. said the barmaid, "he usually orders ale."

And another:

"This morning," says a man to a friend, "Julius Caesar got on the number 9 bus with me at Marble Arch and told me he had the to race back to Rome for Ides of March",

"You're lying," cropped the

0 friend "The number

bus doesn't go to Marble Arch." Among other typical jokes that the British find funny were these:

THE ADVENTURES, OF FIDO

田田

T'wo spinsters went tramp Away."

in the woods-he

for

*

gol

A friend met Harry Pollitt, British Communist leader, In brilliant sunshine with his Um- brella up. "It's raining in Mos-

Comrade Harry explained,

The April 18 election defeat of Communism in Italy hit the Trieste party hard Italians began bolting the party and Slavs, listen- ing more intently to Tito's nation- alistle propaganda, began ignoring: the Cominform's pronouncements.

The Tito-Cominform break' “was. the last straw. Slavs lined up on the side of Tito. They are #111 Communists but mare nationalistic- In favour of Yugoslavia than any- thing else. The pro- Cominform: Communists regrouped slowly and. bafore they collected themselves, Winston Churchill met Health the Titoists managed to snatch the Ministér Ancurin Bevan in the party's funds, leaving the others.

of Commons and the broke-United Press, Socialist leader asked Churchill for twopence to ring up a friend. "Here's fourponce," said Church- ill, "ring up all your friends.”

cow."

House

A child climbed on a hobby horse in a department store and refused to get of Tho storo psychologist was called and after ho whispered in the child's car it Immediately went home with Its mother. "What did you say," marvelled the mother, “lo maka my naughty child so obedient?" Said the psychologist: "I marol" whispered "get off that dashed, horm or I'll break your dashed neck'." What's funny about 1-health? Here's one British example:

A friend spends an hour con- soling a bedridden "comrade. After 09 minutes of solid comfort- ing.he turns to go, trips, ever tho door jamb. » And. mutters aloud: "What a helluva place to carry a coffin."-United Press.

basaltan-chines

:

BALD SPOTE!

Don't let this happan

Beli

to youpon

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