1948-09-08 — Page 4

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TO-DAY

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 1948.

DO YOU THINK, THE COMMITTEE FOR. UN-AMERICAH ACTIVITIES CAN BE IN THE PAY OF MOSCOW TO MAKE A FOOL OF AMERICA?'

TRUMAN A RED

SAYS MRS.BIGMOUTH

World Copyright. By arrangement with Evening Standard.

Every Wednesday in the Telegraph:

D

Sitting on the

ESPITE the cures and

not drinking this and

not eating that, here is

your Uncle Nat knocked flat by gout again.

And there, outside his Sen Nest window, are the happy sucking ice holiday-makers cream and

slapping their children's behinds while the children scream and doggics bark and boatmen wind the 8queaking winches.

Right under his window are the town council's jolly boys, singing at their work, revving up their lorry engines, and digging up the road again.

*

They dig up the road outside the Sea Nest roughly about once a week. In ordinary clrcumstances it is a pleasure to see them so healthy and happy; und to hear their hearty laughter and frank observations on private and public affairs in voices which could be heard in Calois, across the Channel.

But to the victim of Cout the marching of a fly across the celling

would sound like the tramp of armed men. Therefore your Uncle's chief desire at this moment is for a lidal wave to wash them all away, holidaymakers, children, doggies, Jolly boys and all.

Women retire

NCARED by the shocking language wrung from the lips of gouty folk, the women of the house have left the wild beast alone in his lair, with food and water within reach and chairs and tables placed in a line to the bathroom.

By clinging to these and to banis- ters and door handles he can hop on one foot to wash his face when he

AT 2.30, 5.20, feels like it.

MAJESTIC 7.20 & 920 pm.

ONLY

Joan CAULFIELD

Claude RAINS

Audrey TOTTER

THE UNSUSPECTED

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Paulino GODDARD in "AN IDEAL HUSBAND"

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Cathay

AT 2.30, 5.30,

They have also left him Lottie, the devil cat, who has already calen half his food, sneezed in his water, and is taking an intense interest in a bulge in the bed which is your Uncle's toe,

*

Fence

by NATHANIEL

GUBBINS

The problem is how to reach the objective on one leg and bring back the stuff.

pathy, coming softly to the bedside with a muffled wuff and a bottle of brandy and a little, cup hanging from his collar.

he

If it comes to that, what a comfort

The slapping of the little boys' behinds on the beach is becoming so Intense that It sounds like the

would be at any time-going crackle of musketry. Happy Eng- walks with your Uncle and stopping 11sh families are enjoying their now and then for refreshments, holidays in the old-fashioned way.

:

It your Uncle hopped on one leg As far as the cabinet, how would he hop back with a glass, a and a bottle.

★

siphon.

The jolly boys are hacking away at the road. As they pause in their labours anybody within shouting distance can learn that one has a

wife whose destinies should not be

controlled

of

Ministry by the Health and the Ministry of Pen- alons, but by the Ministry of Agri- culture.

Another has an aunt who would be more at home in a dog kennel They all agree that some high-up In the town counell (foreman?) was not born in wedlock.

Would be possible to crawl to the cabinet on hands and knees and bring back the glass, the siphon, and the bottle?

Not in less than six journeys there and back.

Π

Women return

S Lottie is now in a position for final assault on the bulge, the journey to the cabinet might as well be attempted. It couldn't be more painful,

So, while the jolly boys are, sin- ging "The Girl That I Marry” and a Uttle boy is being slapped to death by an enraged parent, the affileted

'FIDDLE' MAKES LIFE EASY

PARIS.

AFRENCHWOMAN proudly showed me what

appeared to be a brend ticket for 750 grammes (Just over 1lb. 10oz.).

Ho

The pride was on account of her son. was very clever at turning the red-printed figuro 2 on a 250-gramme ticket into a 7 with the help of a razor-blade. "You could never toll," declared his mother, who considers herself a normally honest and respectable woman.

So the French are cynical when they observe that the Government intends to reform this and that public abuse. But they will go on forging brend ticketa." And carrying out the complex process of "fiddle" which has become the French system of living, the "Systeme D." TOURIST BOOM

HERE are more foreign tourists in Paris now than at any time since the war: estimated number

is half a million. They swarm through the Louvre, they cluster among the gargoyles on the belfry of Notre Dame; 1,000 take electric torches through the Catacombs and 10,000 climb the Eistel tower every day.

EVELYN

RON'S

They are accing the sights. But are they seeing Paris? Not altogether.

For many of the 3,000,000 people who live here are away on their holidays, and before they went they shut up shop. Shops and restaurants, laundries and dry cleaners, have their shutters up, nad

on the shutters the notice,

"Fer- meture Annuelle" (Annual Clos- ing).

with to support suppose balance is lost?

An attempt is made to stand on one foot. But balance is lost almost Immediately and the body falls back on the friendly bed

It seems hopeless. A drink wouldn't seem so important except as a relief from the excruciating noise of the jolly boys' lorry engine,

What about asking help from the Jolly boys? Why not call out of the window and ask them to come in through the buck door and have a party

This would solve the whole pro- blem, and the party would be en- livened with more details of tho wife who ought to be grazzing in a in a kennel, and the foreman whose meadow, the aunt who ought to live

parents ought to have known better.

*

Aro

But just when the invitation is being shouted the jolly boys heard to drive away singing "Doing What Comes Naturally.'

Lottle makes a frontal attack on

the undefended toe and is repulsed by a handful of water in the face.

limb is lowered from the bed and

Downstairs the excited laughter held high in the air, while the sound of the women can be heard. one is placed firmly on the floor. *.

On hands and knees? No.

Un-

They have been pushing dignified. Throo long hops? But cocktails at the local hotel.

Twenty or 80 theatrea and music-halla are open, but I counted 43 which are shut.

Pariolans are, asking themselves If it would not be better busincas to slogger their holidays instead of barring the door to tourist francs at the peak of the visiting scoson.

DUSTBIN RAID

THE

Existentialists, like the laundresses and the femmes do menage, are taking a holiday.

Some of them have gone to Cannes, There they opened a night club called The Dustbin, which was raided by the police on the gala night when girls scantily dressed in strings of vegetables and empty cans competed for the title of "Miss Poubelle."

Tourists wishing to see cele- brities in Faris have had to con- tent themselves with glimpses of Itinerant Alm stars and Mr. Nocl Coward.

you can go At any other time to the Ritz Bar to see the funny hats worn by the chle ellents.

But I found the Ritz Bar full of English and American women who wore no hats at all. SECRETS OF 'FOLIES'

THE Folies Bergere, of course,

doesn't close. The

£30,000 show running there now, C'Est do Ju

Folic, is in its third year. Tourists crowd it nightly,

I saw no foreigners except four Gis at a Monday matinee. But French people crammed the theatro from 2a. to 15%. Od.). (1800 seats Many were shopkeepers; Paris cheps close on Mondays, in and out of season.

Paul Dorval, owner and manager of the Folies for 30 years, started the Monday matinces about three months ago. Heroes of this perfor mance, which alms to show the public the "secrets" of the Folies hands, Bergere, are the 01 singe dressers, and other backroom boys and girls. For the curtain never back goes down.

and Showgirls dressed dressed nonchalantly continue their act while tough men in dungarees and berets set the stage for the next scene in the background. BUTTER AT 9%. Od.

100 EMIGRATE TO

SPEED UP ROCKETS

By Chapman Pincher

What about just bringing back FOR more than 100 British ex- desert, known by the code name tie bottle in two journeys?

Servicemen with the urge to go Woomera, will also be the testing Empire-building emigration has ground for Britain's atom weapons. suddenly taken on on added aura of adventure.

Cat advances

OTTIE is advancing on the bulge

in the bed in short rushes.

If she reaches it, the yells of the litle boys on the beach will scent like the squealding of mice, compared with the yell which will come from the wild beast's lair.

They have been selected to help construct the 1,500-mile rocket range in Australia.

Recently

un-

FIRST talking point with most Frenchwomen is the ever- soaring cost of food. Butcher's shops have templing cuts of veal and thick stenka. But steak or veal costa ds. or is. a pound, which, puts it beyond the reach of most." Every week the price creeps up a few francs. Meat is off railon.

Butter is rationed. But only very rarely pre the butter tickets honoured. Yet I was served openly in a shop near the Halles with half a pound of butter at 9s. pound flouble the proper price. Now the

ter,

Named from the spear-launching Norman farmers and dairymen aro sticks used by the aboriginals who demanding the derationing of but- lived there until a year ogo. Woomera ід опе of the world's loneliest and driest regions.

So

But the French shopper has compensations. I bought six lettuces for ad., two globe artichokes for 24d., b. fine Brio cheese (no for 15. 2d., a canteloupe

atom-age tickets) the life of these rated humdrum they their jobs as architects, surveyors, Empire bullders will be tough. But melon for 11d a bottle of ex- and engineers. Today they know It will not be dull. they will be privileged to witness the secret stirrings of a fantastic

age.

cellent Macon Burgundy for 29. Od.

They know they have to work

For lunch I am eating a slice of fast. Britain's research on guided malon filed with cracked ico: a missiles-now 11 Forner-stono of thick steak with rissole potatoes: And right in the far corner of the

and imperial defence-is Camembert cheese: bananas and Joir is a small cabinet. In

It will be their job to design and national this Temporarily checked in her ad-

for lack of long-range cream. With the meal goes red small cabinet are a glass, a siphon vance by a push from the other foot, put up the firing pits from which held up

wine: afterwards, cofice und of soda water. and a bottlo

and supor-V2s will one day be launched. facilities. of Lottle refires in good order

Houeurs on a roof-garden with 1 on encircling) They will bulid the observation posts Scotch-tho only alcoholic drink prepares lo execute

Our scientists are having, to test superb view over Paris. allowed to goutees, if one may movement, across the knees to the across the Australian deserts where their first successful guided miselle The name of this luxury res- christen the wretched creatures that. defended' side of the bulge.

scientists will track these projectiles by firing it out to sea of the Welsh taurant? streaking across the sky at 5,000 coast, where there is no secrecy, It is at this agonising moment that miles per hour. The women of the house have

Uncle wishes ha had never not left rest stations on the long wasted his devotion on cats, who are trail to this objective. It is only all devils at heart. Ho wishes he about six yards away, but six had been nicer to doggies.

"

your

It is the pico canteen. this-nloa Cost of a meal like or ten shillings. French secretaries Just how near transcontinental and typists (wages 23 to 20, 108. Thoy, will put up the laboratories misslies are is shown by a new a month and over) prefer to keep where, new fuels capable, perhaps, American rocket which British

spirit stoves in the office: cook their of thrusting a missile beyond the scientists are to suo fired shortly. own steaks at the desk. reach of gravity-will be devised.

Known as Neptune this rocket is POSTSCRIPT—A notice in the Their "ground floor" privileges expected to reach a height of 240 Trois Quartiers, big Paris store, route march on a cobbled French What a comfort a big St Bernard

"TEAROOMS OPEN-MEN road with full pack and blistered would be now a big St Bernard will also extend to atomic research. miles-more than double the height says

ARE ADMITTED." this 3,000

of touched by the best V2. with big, mournful eyes full of sym-For feet.

square miles

yards to an unsupported goutee is as painful and difficult as a 15-mile

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