1948-06-05 — Page 11

每

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH,

CHAPMAN PINCHER

About the Houso

with a quiz on

spring cleaning

WHY DON'T YOU BLOW

UP THE GASWORKS?

WANTED

to

go trout South America, (b) Australia, Bahing on an unexpected (e) India. day off yesterday, but my

wife roped me in for spring-

THEN WE

22. What is the hollest tein- rerature you can stand in here? () 4deg. (blood heat). (b) 90der..

WENT INTO (e) 110deg.

cleaning. My only hope of THE KITCHEN:~ escape was the small-boy tech-

me.

10. Does the temperature of

nique of asking her so many the room rise or fall if you leave questions that she would be

the "fridge" door.open? glad to get rid of

She stood up to a barrage of 36 and got 17 right before I got my freedom.

What's your score?

11. What stops the flame running back along the main and blowing up the gas works? 12. What makes it sing? 13. The vest thing to put on a bad

WE STARTED IN THE burn until the LIVING ROOM:—

1. At home

B.B.C. show

hear you fraction of A

n

ism doctor comeя (n) Nolling; (b) oll, (c) tannic acid.

14. An oval lead pipe is less likely to be burst by frost than a round

second before the back row of one. Way? the studio audience. True or false?

15. When the water comes out milky and then clears it is be

2. The record is only 12ins, cause there is one in it. True or

wide, but the needle travels around it (n) 150ft., (b) 700ft.. (c) 1,500ft.

false?

THE AFTER · THAT, ROOM:-

BED-

36. The creatures which bore holes

23. 'Airing cupboards are places to store woollens. Why?

bad

24. The hottest water comes from (a) the top, (b) the middle (e) the bottom of the tank.

AND A LOOK INTO NURSERY:—

THE

25. Which of there should never be used for cleaning white paint? (a) soap, (b) ammonia.

20. Children have an instinctive fear of animals. True or false?

27. All white babies are born with blue eyes. True or false?

28. Ordinary glass cuts off certain health-giving mys from the sun. These are called. (a) infra-red. (b) ultra-violet, (c) gamma raya?

THEN I SHOUTED FROM THE LOFT:-

20. How far can the biggest Brilish

its with

legs house-spider span stretched out?

30. Which in fact, which fiction (a) They can about cockroaches? By. (b) beer is their favourite drink,

(a) Worms. (b) beetles. (e) Saw (e) they are not beetles.

3. How much electricity in antiques are-- does the best bulb waste by turning it into heat instead of mes. light? (a) 10 percent, (b) 40 percent, (c) 90 percent.

4.

A pendulum takes as long to make a full swing of one incli as to swing six inches. True?

*

How many years old is a plece of conl? (n) 20,000, (b) 2,000,000, (c) 200,000,000.

6. Why does he bolt his food?

7. How many relatives has she in Britain?

31. What job does this pipe do?

WHILE AND

I WAS BEING AND 17. This should be covered up in CHASED ROUND THE GARDEN- the 32. How many bricks in a thunderstorm because it can attract fear of animals. True or false?

average two-storey house? (a) 2,000, 18. Which of these stories abo 1 (b) 20,000, (c) 200,000. inoths

untrue? (a) they will-33- Glye-three-reasons why coot is or attack brand new clothes. (b) good for the soll.

34. Rain water is better than newspaper is n good thing to wrap

for young seedlings. True clothes in because moths dislike the water smell of printing ink, (c) adult or false? moths do more damage than the

Krubs?

19. Why does blucing make sheets whiter?

THEN IN THE BATHROOM:— 20. What is the purpose of this bend?

21. Why does water always swirl

8. He needs a change of down here in a clockwise direction?

water more often when he is

kept in a warm room thun he doen in a cold one.

Why?

9. Ile comes from Africa, but most parrots live in

LINCOLN

(a)

35. When you find the top neatly lifted off, the most likely cause is (a) n ent. (b) expansion of the milk, (c) bird.

THE LAST STRAW:—

.

30. A 10-stone housewife running up stairs 10ft. high in two and a half seconds is working at a rate of (a) 1-10th horse-power, (b) h.p,, (0) 1 h.p.

HERE ARE THE 36 ANSWERS

FIRST THE LIVING 1-True. (Radio Waves nearly 900,000 times

ROOM: sound). 2.~~). dme. 4.-True 5e.

travel

has no digestive G-Dogs' allva faster than

power like ours. Chewing would 7-About purpose. zerve little

B-Water can hold less 6,000,000. oxygen when warm. 9.-b.

MERCURY

Ford

1948 MODEL

FORD 10. H.P. "PREFECT"- DOUBLE-ENTRANCE SALOON

IMMEDIATE

DELIVERY

INSTALMENTS ACCEPTED

HARPER & SHEA, LTD.

SHELL HOUSE, H.K.

TEL. 28273.

SATURDAY, · JUNE 5, · 1948.

Let's All Be Grand For A Day

PARIS.

by BERNARD WICKSTEED

Just before the war the Greek

As we can all take £36 out police found a dealer with a incck looking hat for £4, and spent the

of Britain. now, let's follow the Princess to Paris, and see how far the money will take us.

Parisians dislike their bread much that those who visit England take bacic a couple of BU loaves for their wives, Just as travelling Britons take home nylons. It's true,

stock of

017115

Venun's misaing which he was selling to American tourists at £500

a time, After this spot of culture we'll go to some quiet little restaurant for a real French lunch. This will: cost us about 18s.

Would you like frogs legs to begin with? They are down on the as grenouilles sautes pro- menu vencales.

on

to

A

We won't go to one of those posh Parls hotels in the Opera House dis- trict that cost about £2 10s. a night. We'll travel incognite instead, and try one of the quieter streets off the Rue de Rivoli, where we'll get bed and breakfast (ersatz coffee, and a Anything called provencat on

should be avoided hard roll) for £1.

French menu so by

their honeymoon, people because it is pretty sure be cooked with garlic.

Our dish of frogs' legs costs 39, and there are 24 of them, which works out at 244d. a leg. Some people say they taste like chicken, but the garile disguises this, and, personally, I shan't mind much it I never have them again. Snails work out at the same price (per shall) und you buy them by the dozen like oysters.

French traffic

So feeling very Continental after our frugal breakfast, let us sally out in the direction of the Louvre.

the We'll have to be careful in sireots because all the drivers appear to do just what they like and toot their hooters all the time to show they, are doing it. The din is in- creased by the police. who act referees and constantly blow their

whistles.

is

Live snails

This

means

rest of the afternoon looking," in mirrors and wondering how, it would go down in Hampstead.

Ja woman

Look

Every well-dressed Parls now has the New least not until you go to the night There isn't a knee to be seen-at spots. Then you will see much

than knees.

The women who are not well- dressed nearly all wear aprons and bedroom slippers, and have their hair up in buns.

Taxis cost about twice as much as in London. But there is a good Underground which will take you anywhere for 134d.

One of the stations is called Stalingrad and another Franklin D Roosevelt. The Roosevelt station in in a classler part of Paris, but Stalingrad is bigger.

RELLS

DUMB BE

REGISTERED USIN/PETENT OFKE

YOU WANT MY PERMISSION TO GET MARRIED, WHO'S THE GIRL?

WELL,SHES

ONLY A FARMERS DAUGHTER

BUT -.

THATİL PO IVE HEARD

THAT ONE

Unus Can

Stand On

One Finger

By ROBERT MUSEL NEW YORK-Frank Furt-

ner, who is billed by the Ringling Brothers, Circus na

Unus," stands on one finger.

B

Any engineer, any, anatomlet One of the things that tourists and any other acrobat will tell.

for a tour of the you it is impossible. can do is to go

After walching Unus mount sewers by boat.

Wherever you feel footsore in platform, place his forefinger on a feld Paris, all you have to do is to sit lass globe and holst his body over- at a table outside one of those head--watching him through

cates, and losses from 40 feet, mind you-I boulevard

about open-air order a glass of beer or a cup of went backstage to find out coffee. Having done that, you can

Unus is a pleasant, blond Vien- sit there the rest of the day if you

one bothers you for nese 30 years, five feet 7 inches tall and 145 pounds in weight, He like and no

has a striking wife, Valentina, who is in the act with him. He has money.

Montmartre

blonde secretary, Frieda, who serves as interpreter.

it.

QUESTIONS DODGED

Unus knows English quite well questions about his but pertinent finger-raising trick are referred to secretary. She doesn't under- stand either Unus right forefinger.

examined

his

1

Government has THE French

granted a licence to a firm who won't The Louvre used to be a palace. are going to import 40 tons of live Now it is a museum, and we are snails from Austria. They

Co to going there because it houses the come under their own power.

What are you going to have to

the night Montmartre, .whero most famous picture in the world

rose-coloured clubs are. And also the most famous statue drink, by the way? A bottle of vin I the evening we will

And the pince we'll go Venus de rose? the Mona Lisa and the

wine, and because it is so pale for it after dinner (25s.) is the Bal Milo.

weak. Tabarín. The portrait

Lisa of Monn

many people think it is

It costs 2s. 6d. to go in, and then famous because of her smile. It was Actually it is stronger than most

A bottle will cost us you have to buy a 10s. bottle of painted by Leonardo da Vinci about red wines.

champagne for £3. If you share

other, except the year 1500 and took, four years about half a crown.

It has most. For the main dish we will have this among four and make it last It looks like any

little stubbler than to finish,

three Joints and a pail. It is Beth," The Venus de Milo-the one with a good thick steak, Us. It is all night, your 24-hour show will

blood and bone.

sald, out any arms, you know-was dug funny thing about France that you work out at 175. Od. a head.

The final scenc

you know," I "Of course, up by a peasant in Greece about can buy meat on Fridays and

impossible to do what 130 years age and sold to France for Saturdays only, but you can cat It Tabarin cabaret is the dance of "that it is

the French Can-Can, which in the you do." 6,000 francs-worth £300 then, £7 any time., Beef, veal, and mutton

rank as meat, but lamb and pork elty of changing fashiona hasn't

Unus grinned cheerfuly. 10s. now,

After- You can buy those any day altered much in 50 years,

"Ja,"

he said. "Impossible, ja." one time do not. Fashions change. At

wards the Can-Can girls put on "I have spoken to many Venus Was considered a perfect of the week.

You can't buy she hadn't any

their New Look dresses and go to bats." I said. "And, in fact, I was woman in that

understander in an act any- are: Paris. It is against the law. But a bar next door, where they are once measurements Arms. Her

self. They all think you can't pos Bust 37ins, waist 20ins, hips you can go into a cafe and order joined by the audience.

Our whole day has cost us about sibly do 1. Many of them 42ins. Today

work- ham, bread, and butter, and then mannequins

man make the sandwich yourself.

25 each, not counting shopping.been coming here nightly to watch. ing for Christian Dior, the

the who invented

Now Look,

If there is a woman in the party So at this rate our £35 would last They say they would sooner believe must have a' bust of 30ins., a she will want to go shopping after a week. But what a week it would an elephant could stand on the up waist of 22ins., and hips of 30ins. lunch. My wife bought a cheeky be!

D

не

sandwich in

at

the

Bal

AIRLINE TRAINING CENTRE

LDERMASTON, a name which is going to become as well known as any in International-aviation, is one to remembered by the air-

be

minded.

A large-scale map of southern England would show you Aldermas- ton

as a small (and incidentally charming) village between Read- ing and Newbury, Berkshire. An up-to-date alr map would

Class I alrbeid.

show

it

D 15 Former United States bomber

The little-known air- field of Aldermaston in south England_will_ become world-famous for its International Academy of Airline Flying and Crew-work.

By

CHARLES

of his trunk."

дего-

have

"Ja," Unions nodded happily, "Ja, Impossible."

"So," I ai

I said, "what gimmick, what gadget do you use? In other words, what is the trick?

Unus looked at his secretary. "Gimmick," he repeated. "What is that?"

His secretary shrugged.

ment. The result is that Alder-

LOTS OF PRACTICE Indian representatives asking about

Ale concern,

Training Limited, "I practice eight years to do the make

I which runs it. have the most fully trick." Unus salda "First I equipped air training centre in the handstonds on one hand. Then

in all blg buildings world. It is, in fact, toubtful make handstands on one cane. Soon:

I do it on whether

anywhere outside the Europe.

Once I stand on cane on top United States

perhaps not of bail on top of 25-storey building, even there) the setting up of #

(and

second such placó would now be Jo" KAT physically possible. The stuff to do

the one finger stand?"--I- it just can't be had, and if it could, persisted.

"Always I practise," Unus went it would cost a fortune.

"I put my finger in neck right on. 19, On the flying side there at!

bottle and I fall of champagne Aldermasion, every modern landing many times but at last I do not."

"I've heard of bottle GARDNER

B.B.B. Air Correspondent

there the other

"on

tore

stands be- I sald. "There's a fellow in Philadelphia who can stand on two thumbs. But no one ever_slood on the solitary, unaided forefinger be-

Unus face lit up.

"Jn," he beained, "impossible."—

JESTS AND JEERS

•

•

two pints mako one

"Flying is the occupation of the

pilots will know where it is anyway no proper training facilities

indeed in most countries, there are ald (including ground-control talk-fore. It's impossible."

any-you-down, on which ground staff as for many of them were stationed there during World War II. In- way, and some operators have been well as pilots can be trained,) and u eldentally, they might like to know at their wits end to discover how to full course is offered in air traffic United Press. that their amusing murals have been train their air crews and mainten control procedure and modern flying

The navigation,

radio, station ance men for new types of aircraft carefully preserved in the

methods and equipment, and how to ensure engineering and instrument sections buildings there.

steady flow of fully competent are equipped with practically every Since 1945, Aldermaston has recruits. The new, and severe. per- known training gadget, while ground

We're not so badly off after all. played an important but not very sonnel licensing laws now being in engineers and various maintenance

Britain's ternationally agreed will only servo specialists get full courses in all us In China, avery Sunday is a flag much publicised part in

day. pects of their craft. civil aviation. It has been the to make the problem more acute.

all operating It has been a smart move. there-

For aircraft, the school uses and training centre far

Liquid measure in the school of staff of the British Overseas Aviation fore, on the part of BOAC. BEA and maintains the training machines inexperience:

Kingdom Government allotted by the Corporations, so that cavort. IN THE KITCHEN: 10-It rises. Corporation and British European the United

to declare Aldermaston an by throwing Airways and, as such, has done a

"open a full range of modern airliners is Refrigerator works

went shop." When I

tup." This is important, be- heat out of lee box into room. When first-class job.

day I

I found Chinese, European and dour is open it has to work harder.

From now on, however, Are Indian representatives asking about cause is maltes Aldermaston one of future," says a vocational school an maston. Is setting up shop in the terms and vacancies, while aiready the few places in the world where nouncement. That's for the good 11-There is no air in the main for

Suu -world market.

.backed by the Air India pilots for the now version courses on to new types of place. gas to burn in. 12-Bursting of

has Bombay-London service are steam bubbles cehoes Britain's air corporations, it innumerable in done and spout. 13-a. 14-An decided to turn itself into an inter- special conversion 'course to

national Academy of Airline Flying larise themselves with latest to В circle of oval can change

and Crew-work, with its doors open aids and procedures. greater arca without increasing its

to everyone.

Lavish Equipment So

pipe oval

very circumference.

This may not sound

Aldermaston has been lucky. It expands without stretching when ice impressive occasion, but I assure you

To sum up, this school, which has

inside

The cost of staff train- managed to equip itself lavishly and Ewells. 15.-False. Air that it is. it

enormous cheaply at the end of the war, when accommodation for up to 500 pupils, ing for an airline is bubbles cause milkiness.

item in the annual budget. As an there was a lot of stuff to be had is now offering the world the most from war surplus. Civil aviation comprehensive insiruction in every- example, BOAC spent £1,500,000 on it in 1948-47, and most big airlines in Britain was crying out for trained thing to do with the actual opera- regard training as one of their big men, so top priority was given to tion of airliners, down to courses for gest headaches. In many countries, the needs of the training establish- stewards and air hostesses.

18-b.

tint

IN THE BEDROOM: 17-False. 18. 19Blue neutralisca natural yellowness of linen

Mucion of pure whiteness.

giving

20.-It

IN THE BATHROOM: atops, odours coming back from tho of earth's drains. 21-Because rotation. In southern hemisphere. It goes down anti-clockwise, 22-c. 23-Heat discolours wool Abres. 24.

IN THE NURSERY: 25-, bo- cause it turns it yollow. 20-Folce up Then lo nge of about 11 months,

27- most show instinctive fear. True. 28-b

IN THE LOFT: 20,-Five inches 30.All fact, 31-Lets: overheated water escape from hot water tank. 32, OUTSIDE THE HOUSE:

b. 33--It contains fertiliser; it keeps clugs away! by darkening soll it makes it warm up' qulcker 34- False. 35. 30!

un

PAULA

on

fami-

radio

such

get

conversion

•

pilots and engineers can

con- ones--the bad ones go to the other.

machines and

There seems to be troublo over NE courses are always being sought, not elections everywhere and Hongkong only by airline companies who 210 changing or renewing their equip is no exception. ment, but by smaller charter Arms as well.

BY DENNIS WHEATLEY

THE HANGMAN WON'T SEE ME, EITHER†

CAMERA CREW! LIKE UP FOR THE

MOST SENSATIONAL SHOT YODEL

EVER GET!

NO!

"Do women always have the last BOY?"

"Not always. Sometimes a woman is talking to another woman."

Overheard on the beach: "Why does she get all the alien- "Because of her stand at ease," tion?"

Last Instalment of "Paula? The murderer plunges to

self-destruction in front of the cameras.'"

ACTION!