1948-01-24 — Page 6

I

6

PAUL HOLT

Thinking Aloud

WAS delighted, only the other day, to accept an in- vitation from Harry the Mole to go racing. It was all done in style.

Harry and Jo-jo and Rudy were all congratulated on their honesty, while Marle and I had another little

drink.

LJERE

canic

the tricky bit, but

Harry had hired one of those Motoring School "L" cars Harry managed it superbly. (Basic Sufferers: Brush Up On Within another fine minutes the old widow woman, tears streaming Your Driving!), and Harry's W

her, wrinkled cheeks in great down cheerful girl friend, Marie Per- runnels, becks, burns and tarts of haps, sat in the back seat with gratitude, had consented to put the me and put a rug over my whole roll on our suure thing for the

tast race, The winnings were knees in

most friendly s A

all to go to her son, just invalided out fashion. We had a bottle or two of the Navy.

venison of Chateau Yquem, a

She insisted on putting the money pasty in the boot, and a good on herself, standing there in the thing for the third race.

queue quite alone, brave but for-

you might sny.

What could have been bet. loen a ter?

By the time our good thing in the third had walked it home (we know that the favourite was going to have a go for the National and therefore wasn't trying now, so as not to incur a ronalty) we were in a fairly merry mood,

race,

1 beard Hurry hsisting that lic should, collect her winnings for her.

This was so like Harry.

Mickey, the detective, was keeping | a very close eye on this, and 1 could see that all this philanthropy was bothering him no end. The last race began,

It was wonderful. There was our

We

mimal right out in front and leap- ing like Caughoo. He was up to the Rudy Samba last obstacle when the others were was there and Jo-jo Likewise, at the distance.

And then......he refused. And they had a flask and a good

known might have

it. A clever thing for the Inst

Borse, He stood there patiently til The second passed the post. Harry was so mortifed be did art even try to And the old Indy. #remember wondering, on the way home, whether she really had lost her roll and whether she really hind pt the roll Harry had rustled for her on that stone ginger for the last care.

THEN

The

+

⭑

things began to happen.

loudspeaker announced Quick an objection to our winner. os a flash Harry and Budy and Jo- jo lugan scurrying around stonging to retrieve discarded tote place the

Harry. kets. (I remember it was the Master Mind, with thought picking up tickets the fourth

<21 horse, nobody else having reasoned that this animal would now come into place money).

Marie Perhaps, who feather stoop- free in a frit two-way stretch, Jest me to the bar, where Ivy

I

remember wondering, whether she really was a Woman at all,

tou,

widow

There was a curious ifttle smile on Mickey the detective's face when we paul goodnight to him.

the

On the way home Muric Perhaps and I souggled up anw gang "Now gave us two is the Hour" gether, Hurry

of her Mole, I thought, was a little quiet, loud- A last he spoke. "I think I've been certain rabbed," he said dolefully.

farge Sc

Scutcher In lionour birthday. J Just

the then

speaker mnounced that

!he

citizen raceitner had dropped a roll R.S.P.C.A. note of falling money, and would

1 know worked on the Ander return it to the clerk of the A GIRL

land throughout the war. She

course.

THE HONGKONG TELEGRAPH, SATURDAY, JANUARY 24, 1948.

itka long way for a

little one like me ......

MASVIRAL

PLAN

TEST FLIGHT

Copyright in all Countries!

iי

WAS ANYTHING EVER MORE GILBERTIAN?

-By “Candidus”

HAVE purposely refrained from commenting 'upon the Kowloon City affair, because I believed that with the passing of days, the Chinese Government would appreciate the utter foolishness of allowing_law- lessness to assume an interpretation of legality. I hnd expected the good sense of China's statesmen to indicate in no uncertain terms that the defiance of the laws of a friendly state, by irresponsible Chinese agitators, could not be tolerated. Like many olliers of all nationalities, I am disappointed. The absurdity of the affair! That it should be invested with a pseudo-national importance is by no means faltering to Chinese omelaldom.

One is forced to the conclusion that there is more behind the sceno than the world knows, and that China is either unable or unwilling to rebuke those who refuse to conform to international ethics. There are so many contradictory aspects which support the above conclu- sion,

In his book, "Singapore and After," Lord Strabolgi revenis that Generalissime Chiang Kai-shek offered to send us ten divisions of trained soldiers to hold the Kowloon mainland against the Japanese, (unfortunately, we had to nrm them, and at the time were unable to do

30). Of course, I am accepting Lord Straboigi's word that Bie offer was made. Here was an offer to assist in the retention of Hongkong, China doubtless preferring to see the British flag in preference to the Rising Sun of Japan. There was no silly quibble In those days an the rights of jurisdiction over Kowloon City; and, moreover, there never has been in the history of the Colony.

•

SPEAK with a very close regard for China and things Chinese, and it is because of this regard that I am horrified that such a necne as was witnessed on Shameen

EVEN GREAT MEN

GROW TOO

THAT is the greatest péril facing is us untion?

war as we

in

by

JOHN GORDON

Wo

OLD

I

Not a single one of them ean hope to play any vital part in a future

wer.

could have been possible. The sub- versive and lawless rabble had their day, and their own temporary and emply trimaph merely shanted nation so very recently elevated to the position of one of the five blg powers of the work. What can the world think?

to

I! Is unbelievable that the Chinese Government, if it really has the well-being of its great country at heart, can tolerate insults to n friendly

The power. Do

many friendly hands held out mean noth- ing? Unfortunately, during the last two years we have witnessed so many seein unexplainable nations which

calculated

spurn deliberately forbign friendship, and yet it is too obviously unwise for Chim to develop It? The consequence is that

How can we avoid

Yet we are still blithely promot-a policy of selfishness and isolation.

Tolerance and bottom think we should make rule on seniority, from the Mediter-

respect are at- 21 very nearly touch the

10 Portsmouth and from tributes mutually desirable in the before we triumph,

now that every Service chief rouen

Portsmouth to the Admiralty, nd-conduct of International affairs to- We went into the 1914 war over 50 years of age is replaced intrals who are not only obsessed by day, and yet these two words ap- with an Army organised by by a

an ok system but who block younger man within

the pear to have no meaning in some advancement of juniors with new quarters. To infame students and Jelens and the ability to cary them to incite them to violence is a major Boer War experts to fight the year. Boer War all over again.

No man over 50 today can be out.

crime, and yet we see various youth We forced high-explosive expected to take an active part It is much the

tions turning young people

to away from their studles join shells, tanks, and peroplanes in any future war. And few Army.

lawless agitators. Little can these upon these gentry, who resent- men over 50 today should play

The average age of the military souths how the incalculable harm et] their arrival. Eventually, any part in the shaping of the

country at the behest next nembers of the Army Council to-they do their won machine with which the after replacing them, we

day is 53, headed by Lord Mont-of those who prefer chaos to order. the war after it had lasted war will have to be fought he gomery, who is 60.

It is Faddening to feel that China cannot keep her house in order--- to cause the tradition into which twice as long as it ought have done, cost us so

All have rendered the nation great cannot even control her students, or much they were born, and in which

them from becoming the they should now be demobilisedpawns of the agents of economile

well. They are too old

It was a sorry day for China when General Marshall gave up his hope As for the Air Force, it is a young of assisting in the sorely needed man's Service, and it should

after the war be rehabilitation were shaper and controlled by young reaped its harvest.

men.

with same

이

the anisations

That a powerful enemy should tumble us in the dust, wrest our power, passessions, and freedom from us, and re- serfdom or some- duce us la thing akin to it,

We laugh at the idea-be- cause it has never yet happen- ed. But one day it may hap- pen. One day we may lose the last battle in a evitably lose the first.

Have you ever thought why The other day she went back to we start our wars with a series the form and, for sentiment's sake, of disasters? walked down the lane to her little The reason is simple. After money that we never recovered they were trained will be obso-ervice, but the time has come when prevent shed. There were electric light and

war (every victorious war we leave our economic stability, and put lete by the time that Pracefully with the men they led so and political destruction. electric heating There were run- nlng water and a fan, a wider win-the men who won it to prepare the flower of a generation

our manhood into premature To say that is no disparage- learn new tricks.

ment of the men in the high What is the result? They graves.

posts today. Their achieve prepare us for the sort of wor

ments in the last magnificent.

lived in a shed with a coke stove for mirth-in heating, and she fetched water for washing from the pump and heated it on the stove.

This, as you can imagine, aroused n considerable burst of which Mickey, the course detective, Rentally joined,

saw

But Harry did not laugh; the eyes of the Mole were shining. I him whisper to Rudy and Jo-jo and off they went.

Working really hard, they had collected, by gaining the confidence of many trusting citizens, as much as £100 in five minutes. And when They went to the clerk of the course, old guess what-there was a dear widow

waiting; there to claim it.

woman

dow, and a real lock on the door.

"Lacky girl," said my friend. "This is a cowshed now." said the farmer jovially,

Move friend,

Daisy." wick over,

us for the next.

PRES

they won. They look instead of forward.

-But what a silly

time to start

year, anyway!

A

BOUT this time of year You may have noticed a general tendency to

.?1נן

the date wrong on letters and cheques--a silent protest, per- haps, at starting a new year

By

BERNARD WICKSTEED

back

¡DID

THE LESSON

We did not learn iD we learn our lesson?

at all.

of comes.

Not

The machine for the 1939 war was shaped by the experts who had won the 1914 war.

Our infantry was still think ing of trenches when it went lo France.

War

dogs to

The record of all of them is Yet its leaders today, with Lord shot with gleams of

had

glory. Tedder at their head, have MANY peopic cannot appreciate

early

PERIL AHEAD

Afties.

the Kowloon City question in

proper perspective or true signi ficance. Many probably think of a elty equal to any of the world's smaller ciiles. Little do

they realise that the total area of land,

plus whatever

-bricks and Waly

of which may compose the

Some won immortal fame. All average age in the deserve well of their country. which for airmen is hoary old age.

We londed them with well- won honours. It would have been better perhaps if we had

If they don't go heaped

of a certain mensure wealth upon them as well to T changes in the methods

air warfare may well be A

theory and

new enable them to quit their posts most tremendous of all methods of

had

honours been and carry their new evolved in the 20 years between The Jewish Year can be any one the wars. of six different lengths, three nf But our "experts" were still them shorter than ours and three in the pre-tank, pre-aeroplane,

and pre-parachutist age.

a

of them longer.

Chinese years run in cycles of 60,

and instead of being numbered each

one has its name, ilere are 12 of them: rat, as, tiger, rabbit, dragon

make, horse, sheep, fowl, monkey.

tot. and pig.

new

War

What was the result?

with ease and dignity, but un- of the last war is B

The bomber and fighter technique

thing of the Even the human pilot may be

fortunately we had a touch of past. meanness at that moment. Anished.

Us.

to

If we are content to let the

not

the would, if valued, probably

reach one tenth of the price of the Empire State

In Bulking New York, or any other sizable build- ing In any other country, Its jeable value to Hongkong is, at the most, a few hundred Hongkong dollars per month and yot, this Air very insignificant little backyard has at assumed an importance of the first

Gilbertian?

I was the beginning of the great scramble of the boys for the jobs, and they didn't happen to be the Force be run by men who are Dun- run ort of boys in the eyes of the sun when men inevitably temd magnitude. Was anything ever more

10 louk kirk. the fall of Europe, and there who were allotting the jobs.

backwards. Instead of by very nearly the fall of Britain.

young men peering, restlessly into Because we withheld the песел-

difflet the future, there is peril ahead for True, the aeroplane saved us sary money we made it

for these great war leaders to re- India has 14 calendars, all of them from complete extinction.

tire. We should be wise now different. The Most year is 11 The Air Ministry, being a think again and make it easy. days shorter than ours, whleh means

The time has come when a the they gain a year on us in every 32, young Service, and consequent-

interests of the nation's safety centenariany less hidebound by tradition decade ahead they should be moved, and you can become

than the others, had managed But they ought to be superannuated All these different calendars, and to provide us with a tiny but upon the most generous basis. done by many others that have been forgot- reasonably efficient Air Force.

many ten, are the attempts of man to work or auspicious about it. The

calendar and re ou a sum that is next to impos sun, moon and stars are not in used duly after himself. The sug- sille. any particular juxtaposition. It restion is that he wanted to isn't even a particularly nice the year on its shortest day,

In the dead of winter.

When you come to think of

it, why should the new year things that just happened and didn't at 97.. begin in January! It isn't get into the papers. natural. There is nothing holy

month.

A theory is that it was Julius Caesar. He made changes in the

But even the Air Ministry would have failed us had not The problem is now to fit a day been taken out of its hands and the production of aeroplanes

start

but into month

is,

und the two of them

days, 12 hours, 44 minutes and

3.3 left the blimps of that Ministry a little dizzy and more than a little resentful,

NEXT WAR Boffins, not Blimps

people objected and said it ought to into a year. A lunar month is 29 speeded up with a rapidity that changed fundamentally. Now if the new year began on herin with a new moun as it always

had done. December 21 there might be seme I don't know how true this point to it. because that is the shortest day. Or, better still, March but astronomers have checked

there was n new 21. because that

Is the spring and found that

moon on January 1 in the year B.C. equinox when, for the first since the nutumn, the day is as long 45. when Caesar made his reforms.

as the night. But the only

thne

thing

that distinguishes January 1 Cram any other winter day is the num-

ber of Scotsmen with hangovers.

At one time the new year did be

ONE

Leap year

seconds long, and a solar year 345 days, 5 hours. 18 minutes and up 46.2 seconds,

When Julius Caesar reformed one calendar, dates were so out of hand that people were celebrating mid- summer night in the winter.

He

put things on an even keel by or- derint a special year of 445 days-

OUR FOLLY What it cost us WE moved from disaster

disaster until the 1914 re-

to

the final stage of the last war the technique of war suddenly Armies, nir forces and navies as we know them today are now large- ly obsolete. The war of the future and will be an affair of scientists chemists-not of soldiers, saltors and irren as we have known them.

The future ighting force may Ad- have to be shaped not in the

miralty, the War Ofilee, or the Air Mistry but in the universities, the

leges.

to the Year of Confusion it was call-ies had been put on the shelf laboratories, and the technical col-

.

Gregory's plan

of Caesar's changes was make every fourth year a leap ed-and instituting leap year.

murder some gin in March. Thal's how Septem- year, but after his bar.got its

(septein-Latin, idiot altered it in every third year, name for seven). Octuber, November and and in no time the calendar was out. A LEAP year in every four would' December were named in the some of hand again. way (Latin: octo, ; novem, 9: de- cem, 10).

Extra months

wos

Augustus Caesar

be nit right If the year was

with knowledge decorations

and new men with more modern. minds put in their places.. We may indeed have reached the) Again, what was the, conse-, Board of Admiralty, the Army Coun- clay when we must choose for the quence of our folly? exactly 365 days long. which

cil, and the Air Council men The war lasted years longer degrees for sclentiac cancelled leap Caesar thought it to be. But it isn't. year for eight years, and so put It is 11 minutes 13.8 seconds shorter than it should have done, and rather than men with it right, and then, ilke Julius, claims than that. In a hundred years this cost us so much money that it for bravery. ed his reward by naming one of adds in nesly 10 hours, and by ruined us.

We must be ready to begin the in the old Roman the months after himself. Hence Au- the 18th century it had accumulat

There is indeed a case for ar- not "Blimps."

next war with "Boffins" in control, THAT

ten Aust.

ed to ten whole days. calendar, which had only

We been months or moons. I didn't work

And A question of protocol arose over Once again people were celebrat-gument that had

It is the scientists who will well, beenuse ten kmar months is August at the time had only Ing feasts at the

wrong time

the war an answer to the atomic menace, not of properly prepared make 295 days and the solar your 30 days to July's 31. Augustus didn't year. It was the same trouble that would never have come at all. the soldier. It is the selenlist who has a Hitle over 305 days.

to another Caesar having a Caesar had. So in the year 1582 One nation does not attacks will in turn pass from defence So the Romans Invented January longer month than he, so he took a Pope Gregory XIII. stopped the rot another unless it feels certain offence again, not the admiral, the and February and tacked thei on day from September and added it to by cutting out ten days. October 4 of after. December to make the-

victory. The temptation general, and the air-marshal trained year August, thus putting millions of was followed by October 15.

on the old drill books. To stop any further creeping of that weighs the sealer against nearer to the right length.

A scientifle fighting force is January was named after the twin enside Inniladies who charge more the date Pope Gregory arranged for you is to be so ill-prepared only insurance against war, and our pagan gods Janu and Janus. They Aust than they do in Septem- leap year to be left out three times that you look to be "easy only security in it. were penceful fellows, and it was her. There ought to be a busl of

every 100 years. We still stick to ment." presence hoped that their

in the him on every boarding-house man that arrangement, which is why

That is the condition WO calendar would offset the warllite telniece.

ours le called the Gregorian calen- given influence of Mars, who had

were in in 1914 and 1939. It is Gregory's system has reduced the the condition we shall bo on error to 20 seconds a year, and it ten or 15 years hence, when the

for pote

Pounds Into the pockets of

those

Of course, there are plenty his name and some of his habits to other new years besides ours.

Jews have had theirs. It was March.

Nobody really

knows

January got switched from

place to first.

how September 15. The Chinese have 11th wait till February 10, indus

It was one of those May 10.

of dar.

The

to will take 3,323 years for that to next war may come, if we till mount up to a days. So it shouldn't

worry us.

on repeating the old folly.

In

TOO OLD DOGS

our

To learn new tricks

approaching to years of age or MOST of our admirals today are

go

over it, led by the First Sea. Lord, Sir John Cunningham, aged 62.

I should like to see a commission appointed by the United Nations sent out to Investigate the "great Don't let us repeat the fullies of crisis," and to know that their terms the past. Let us get rid of the old of reference made it necessary for men in all the Services. Han the them to hold their sessions in Kow- laurels about their them with dignity, consideration and pany them on their first visit to the

necks.

loon City. I should nke to accom Treat every generosity.

little squalor patch termed a "city" and then observe their utler con- But for the sake of the lives of fusion and bewilderment when they our sons, get rid of them quickly. arrive on the scene.

DAVID LANGDON

CARTOON

"Streeter says: 'Fairies at the bottom of your garden-spray:

with D.D.T.